[blparent] great responses to my question about experiences with more than one child

[Jennifer Bose]

On 8/24/11, blparent-request at nfbnet.org <blparent-request at nfbnet.org> wrote:
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> Today's Topics:
>
>    1. Re: school teacher - not an issue (Deborah Kent Stein)
>    2. Re: experiences of blind parents with more than	one	small
>       child (Chad Allen)
>    3. Re: experiences of blind parents with more	than	one
>       smallchild (debbie grace)
>    4. Re: school teacher - not an issue (Nikki)
>    5. Re: school teacher - not an issue (Veronica Smith)
>    6. Re: school teacher - not an issue (Amanda Winkler)
>    7. Re: school teacher - not an issue (Erin Rumer)
>    8. Re: school teacher - not an issue (Veronica Smith)
>    9. Re: school teacher - not an issue (Erin Rumer)
>   10. Re: school teacher - not an issue (Chad Allen)
>   11. Re: [Bulk]  school teacher - not an issue (Brandy W)
>   12. Re: school teacher - not an issue (Veronica Smith)
>   13. Re: school teacher - not an issue (Nikki)
>   14. Re: school teacher - not an issue (Nikki)
>   15. Re: school teacher - not an issue (Nikki)
>   16. Re: school teacher - not an issue (Nikki)
>   17. Re: [Bulk]  school teacher - not an issue (Nikki)
>   18. Re: school teacher - not an issue (Chad Allen)
>   19. Re: school teacher - not an issue (Nikki)
>   20. Re: school teacher - not an issue (Barbara Hammel)
>   21. Re: school teacher - not an issue (Barbara Hammel)
>   22. Re: school teacher - not an issue (Nikki)
>   23. Re: school teacher - not an issue (Nikki)
>   24. Re: school teacher - not an issue (Pickrell, Rebecca M (TASC))
>   25. Re: school teacher - not an issue (Nikki)
>   26. Re: school teacher - not an issue (Sheila Leigland)
>   27. Re: school teacher - not an issue (Pickrell, Rebecca M (TASC))
>   28. Re: school teacher - not an issue (Nikki)
>   29. Re: school teacher - not an issue (Nikki)
>   30. Re: school teacher - not an issue (Barbara Hammel)
>   31. Re: school teacher - not an issue (Pickrell, Rebecca M (TASC))
>
>
> ----------------------------------------------------------------------
>
> Message: 1
> Date: Tue, 23 Aug 2011 12:12:20 -0500
> From: "Deborah Kent Stein" <dkent5817 at att.net>
> To: "NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List" <blparent at nfbnet.org>
> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
> Message-ID: <002501cc61b7$d20ba630$0b00a8c0 at DKSLAPTOP>
> Content-Type: text/plain; format=flowed; charset="utf-8";
> 	reply-type=original
>
>
>
> Dear Nikki,
>
> Great news!  The more you take control, the more your folks are likely to
> see how capable you are.
>
> Debbie
>
> ----- Original Message -----
> From: "Nikki" <daizies304 at comcast.net>
> To: <blparent at nfbnet.org>
> Sent: Tuesday, August 23, 2011 10:03 AM
> Subject: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
>
>
>> Just an update...
>>
>>        Hi all.
>> I want to thank you all for the confidence boost.
>> My dad, son, and I went to meet the teacher yesterday.
>> I asked her if she could email me the handouts and I was very pleased to
>> find out that she would be happy to do it for me.
>> But my dad still requested the paper handouts for himself.
>> IDK why, but it was rather upsetting that he feels he has to be involved.
>>
>> Anyway, success!
>> Oh and I?m going to pick my son up from school, give my dad a break, lol.
>>
>> It?s confusing to me that my parents complain, mainly my dad, about having
>>
>> to do everything, but when I take a stand, it back fires.
>> Meaning, it?s hard for him to accept me being independent.
>>
>> Nikki
>> _______________________________________________
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>>
>
>
>
>
> ------------------------------
>
> Message: 2
> Date: Tue, 23 Aug 2011 10:26:54 -0700
> From: "Chad Allen" <chad at chadallenmagic.com>
> To: "'NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List'" <blparent at nfbnet.org>
> Subject: Re: [blparent] experiences of blind parents with more than
> 	one	small	child
> Message-ID: <003201cc61b9$db159310$9140b930$@com>
> Content-Type: text/plain;	charset="us-ascii"
>
> Very helpful. I'm forwarding this onto my wife now.
>
> Thanks for the insight.
>
>
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org [mailto:blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org] On
> Behalf Of Melissa Ann Riccobono
> Sent: Tuesday, August 23, 2011 8:37 AM
> To: 'NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List'
> Subject: Re: [blparent] experiences of blind parents with more than one
> small child
>
> Hello Jen and list,
> 	This is very long...  Ve warned.
>
> This is a great discussion.  My husband and I are both blind and we have two
> children.  Austin is 4, and Oriana is 15 months.  Let me open the discussion
> by saying I didn't experience a lot of challenges due to blindness
> specifically...  I, and all parents with more than one child I suspect, face
> the challenges of how to balance the needs of both children while staying
> sane myself.  As my sister, who is also blind by the way, says, "It's a huge
> difference between having one child and two...  After you get used to that,
> having a third child is a lot easier."  (She has three boys who are 12, 9,
> and 7.)
> While I can't say I know what it's like to have three children, I can say it
> is a leap between worrying about one child and all of a sudden adding a baby
> into the mix.  Some things are just hard in general the second time
> around...  Lack of sleep, for example, is a lot harder to deal with if you
> have an older child who doesn't take naps anymore so you can't catch up
> during the day while the baby sleeps.  Some things though, are fantastic.
> Watching your children interact and play with one another...  Having more
> hugs...  Also, just being less worried in general about doing something
> wrong with a new baby because you've all ready done this before.
> 	My husband travels in spurts for his job.  He won't be gone for a
> long time, then all of a sudden he'll have periods when he's gone for a week
> at a stretch, or gone for a few days, back for a few days, and then gone
> again.  We do not have family near us, so we've built up a network of
> friends and people we trust who can watch our kids for a variety of reasons.
> Or, sometimes when my husband is traveling a lot I ask someone to come over
> or go out to dinner with me and the kids so I can have some adult
> conversation.  For the most part though, I handle mornings and
> evenings/nights by myself while my husband is gone.  Austin now goes to a
> fabulous in home day care, which is run more like a preschool, in our
> neighborhood four days a week.  Oriana goes one day a week.  I am the
> president of the National Federation of the Blind of Maryland, which means I
> have to do a lot of work from home, and quite a few meetings and events
> outside the home, on a weekly basis.  Since December I have had a wonderful
> older woman who has helped do driving and other things for the Maryland
> affiliate, and who also watches Oriana quite a bit downstairs in our house
> while I work upstairs.  This is nice because I can go down and see Ori any
> time I want, and I can also nurse her if she wants to nurse during the
> day...  (Yes, she's still nursing some.)  The help I have is directly
> related to the job I'm doing now, and not to the fact that I have two
> children.  Is the help wonderful and appreciated, absolutely!  Would I want
> or need it if I wasn't doing the work I'm doing?  No, I don't think I
> would...  Or, I wouldn't need it as often as I use it now.  My sister stayed
> home with her boys and had very little outside help...  And her husband also
> travels a bit for his job.  Everyone is different though, and if you want
> and can afford extra help, by all means, go for it!
> 	How far apart are you thinking of having your children?  This is a
> question to consider carefully, if you can.  My sister had her kids about
> 2.5 years apart.  She swore by this.  She said it was a lot easier because
> she never got out of the "baby" phase completely.  She still had one in
> diapers when her next child was born, so she was used to doing diaper
> changes.  Also, especially since she ended up having three boys, her kids
> have been interested in similar things while growing up.  I however, really
> wanted my son to be a little older before trying for number two.  I feel
> there is a big difference between a child of 2.5 and a child of 3.  At 2.5 I
> felt as if Austin still really needed me and his dad, and one on one
> attention.  We still rocked him to sleep many nights, and laid in his bed
> other nights to help him sleep.  He wasn't potty trained yet, and I really
> wanted to have one child out of diapers before having a baby.  I had no
> trouble "going backwards" in this respect!  Even Austin's behavior changed a
> lot in just that half a year.  Some of the impulsivity of toddlerhood left,
> and he became more of a "preschooler" who was better able to think of others
> and not just himself, to entertain himself for periods of time, and who had
> more self help skills.  Did and does he still need me and my husband?
> Absolutely!  But overall he was more independent when Oriana was born when
> he was 3.5 than he would have been had she been born when he was 2.5 or even
> 3.  Now I didn't want my kids five years apart...  For me, that seemed too
> big of a gap, but there are others who swear by this method because their
> older child is in kindergarten, or almost there, and then they can start
> over with a baby
> 	 As far as carseats go, sometimes another year or half year between
> children can make the difference between traveling with two carseats or
> traveling with a carseat and a booster seat.  Unfortunately, in my case,
> this plan did not work out because, although Austin is plenty tall enough
> for a booster, he's still a couple of pounds under weight for one.  This
> means hauling around two car seats is our reality, at least for a little
> longer.  I do have to say I hire drivers more often than I used to in order
> to run errands.  Or, I wait to run them until both kids are at day care, or
> until at least Austin is out of the mix.  When traveling with both kids to
> run errands, a driver is nice because I can leave the car seats in the car.
> We can also go when the errands are done instead of having to wait for a
> ride.  Of course, it's a lot easier to travel with only Oriana on errands
> because I only have to deal with one car seat if I am by myself.  I
> certainly have hauled two car seats however.  I have a Sit 'N' Stroll, so
> Oriana uses it for her carseat.  This means I can pull her behind me, have
> Austin's car seat on my other arm, and still use my dog for short distances.
> There are also bags you can get so you can put a car seat over your shoulder
> or on your back.  If I had to do a lot of hauling of car seats, I would
> definitely invest in one of these.  Right now though, I am able to take the
> bus, walk, or hire drivers most of the time.
> 	We also have a wagon with two seats.  Austin usually likes to walk
> now, but if he gets tired it's nice to have a place for him to ride, and
> Oriana loves the wagon as well.  I also sometimes take Oriana in her
> backpack, depending on where we're going, and that leaves my hand free to
> hold Austin's hand.
> 	As far as keeping both children safe...  To me, this is not that
> different than keeping one child safe...  Although, of course, there are
> differences.  But it's just learning to listen for one child while
> interacting with the other, and/or doing the same thing with both
> children...  You develop techniques that work for you and your children.
> Certainly there is the issue with small toys.  Austin is very into Legos
> right now, and also a set called Motor Works which has plastic vehicles he
> can take apart and put back together.  All of these vehicles have small
> plastic screws Oriana could easily swallow.  So we have rules about where he
> can play with these toys, where they are stored, how quickly he has to pick
> them up when he's done with them, etc.  It's a little more difficult because
> Oriana has been trying to climb on all of the furniture lately, but this
> just means I need to be more in tune with Oriana, where she is, and what
> she's doing when I know these small toys are being played with.  Also, you
> have a few months to get used to your new baby and your new situation before
> that baby really starts moving around and getting into things.  Again, I
> think all of parenting is a learning process, and you figure things out as
> you go.
> 	Again, all parents who go from one child to two have questions.
> And, all parents have accidents happen to their children when they turn
> their back for that split second it takes to answer the phone, take
> something out of the oven, etc.  If you can, try to take blindness out of
> the mix for a while when you're deciding to have another child.  Do you have
> the finances to care for another child.  Do you have enough love to go
> around?  Do you want your son or daughter to have a sibling?  Also, think
> back to the questions and fears you had before you had your first child.
> I'm sure you had many--yet, things must be going very well if you are even
> talking about a second child, which means you've answered those questions
> and conqurred those fears.  I suspect you will have the same experience if
> you decide to take the jump and go for number two.
> 	Sorry for the long post, and thanks for reading if you've gotten
> this far.  I certainly do not have all of the answers, but I would be happy
> to talk to you any time off list or via phone if I can answer any questions
> for you.  My email is melissa at riccobono.us
> Good luck with this huge, and very personal decision!
> Melissa
>
>
> _______________________________________________
> blparent mailing list
> blparent at nfbnet.org
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
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> blparent:
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/chad%40chadallenma
> gic.com
>
>
>
>
> ------------------------------
>
> Message: 3
> Date: Tue, 23 Aug 2011 10:16:54 -0800
> From: debbie grace <debbiegrace at gci.net>
> To: 'NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List' <blparent at nfbnet.org>
> Subject: Re: [blparent] experiences of blind parents with more	than
> 	one	smallchild
> Message-ID: <9015416ABEFF4A0FA8450292D1DE98EB at DCLVYCC1>
> Content-Type: text/plain; charset=us-ascii
>
> Hello,
> My name is Debbie Grace. I too am a blind Grandparent with 2 grandchildren
> who have been with me for about three years. They are now 3 and 5 years.  My
> daughter died in May of 09 and I have custody of them right now.  It has
> been quite an adventure for us.  I can understand about the toys and the car
> seats.  I too have to carry them around with me.  I also take a lot of cabs
> and they can provide at least one car seat for me.  I also am single so I do
> have a network of friends that help me and some family around.  I have been
> accused of not being able to potty train because of my sight and not being
> able to take care of my grandchildren.  I do not let this bother me because
> as I have been able to adapt.  One of my granddaughters just started
> kindergarten this year , so I am looking forward to some of the other
> challenges that will come up.  I am very thankful for this site and the
> suggestions of the other parents.  I am seeking permenant custody and will
> have a trial this December.  Their Father is still in the picture.  It has
> been very emotional and rewarding for me to be able to spend time with my
> granddaughters.  I do hope that the courts will leave them with me as I am
> loving them very much and they really a paart of my life.  It is great to be
> able to tlak to you all and I will be looking forward to more info.
> Thank You
> Debbie Grace,Hannah and Ashley
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org [mailto:blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org] On
> Behalf Of Chad Allen
> Sent: Tuesday, August 23, 2011 9:27 AM
> To: 'NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List'
> Subject: Re: [blparent] experiences of blind parents with more than one
> smallchild
>
> Very helpful. I'm forwarding this onto my wife now.
>
> Thanks for the insight.
>
>
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org [mailto:blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org] On
> Behalf Of Melissa Ann Riccobono
> Sent: Tuesday, August 23, 2011 8:37 AM
> To: 'NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List'
> Subject: Re: [blparent] experiences of blind parents with more than one
> small child
>
> Hello Jen and list,
> 	This is very long...  Ve warned.
>
> This is a great discussion.  My husband and I are both blind and we have two
> children.  Austin is 4, and Oriana is 15 months.  Let me open the discussion
> by saying I didn't experience a lot of challenges due to blindness
> specifically...  I, and all parents with more than one child I suspect, face
> the challenges of how to balance the needs of both children while staying
> sane myself.  As my sister, who is also blind by the way, says, "It's a huge
> difference between having one child and two...  After you get used to that,
> having a third child is a lot easier."  (She has three boys who are 12, 9,
> and 7.) While I can't say I know what it's like to have three children, I
> can say it is a leap between worrying about one child and all of a sudden
> adding a baby into the mix.  Some things are just hard in general the second
> time around...  Lack of sleep, for example, is a lot harder to deal with if
> you have an older child who doesn't take naps anymore so you can't catch up
> during the day while the baby sleeps.  Some things though, are fantastic.
> Watching your children interact and play with one another...  Having more
> hugs...  Also, just being less worried in general about doing something
> wrong with a new baby because you've all ready done this before.
> 	My husband travels in spurts for his job.  He won't be gone for a
> long time, then all of a sudden he'll have periods when he's gone for a week
> at a stretch, or gone for a few days, back for a few days, and then gone
> again.  We do not have family near us, so we've built up a network of
> friends and people we trust who can watch our kids for a variety of reasons.
> Or, sometimes when my husband is traveling a lot I ask someone to come over
> or go out to dinner with me and the kids so I can have some adult
> conversation.  For the most part though, I handle mornings and
> evenings/nights by myself while my husband is gone.  Austin now goes to a
> fabulous in home day care, which is run more like a preschool, in our
> neighborhood four days a week.  Oriana goes one day a week.  I am the
> president of the National Federation of the Blind of Maryland, which means I
> have to do a lot of work from home, and quite a few meetings and events
> outside the home, on a weekly basis.  Since December I have had a wonderful
> older woman who has helped do driving and other things for the Maryland
> affiliate, and who also watches Oriana quite a bit downstairs in our house
> while I work upstairs.  This is nice because I can go down and see Ori any
> time I want, and I can also nurse her if she wants to nurse during the
> day...  (Yes, she's still nursing some.)  The help I have is directly
> related to the job I'm doing now, and not to the fact that I have two
> children.  Is the help wonderful and appreciated, absolutely!  Would I want
> or need it if I wasn't doing the work I'm doing?  No, I don't think I
> would...  Or, I wouldn't need it as often as I use it now.  My sister stayed
> home with her boys and had very little outside help...  And her husband also
> travels a bit for his job.  Everyone is different though, and if you want
> and can afford extra help, by all means, go for it!
> 	How far apart are you thinking of having your children?  This is a
> question to consider carefully, if you can.  My sister had her kids about
> 2.5 years apart.  She swore by this.  She said it was a lot easier because
> she never got out of the "baby" phase completely.  She still had one in
> diapers when her next child was born, so she was used to doing diaper
> changes.  Also, especially since she ended up having three boys, her kids
> have been interested in similar things while growing up.  I however, really
> wanted my son to be a little older before trying for number two.  I feel
> there is a big difference between a child of 2.5 and a child of 3.  At 2.5 I
> felt as if Austin still really needed me and his dad, and one on one
> attention.  We still rocked him to sleep many nights, and laid in his bed
> other nights to help him sleep.  He wasn't potty trained yet, and I really
> wanted to have one child out of diapers before having a baby.  I had no
> trouble "going backwards" in this respect!  Even Austin's behavior changed a
> lot in just that half a year.  Some of the impulsivity of toddlerhood left,
> and he became more of a "preschooler" who was better able to think of others
> and not just himself, to entertain himself for periods of time, and who had
> more self help skills.  Did and does he still need me and my husband?
> Absolutely!  But overall he was more independent when Oriana was born when
> he was 3.5 than he would have been had she been born when he was 2.5 or even
> 3.  Now I didn't want my kids five years apart...  For me, that seemed too
> big of a gap, but there are others who swear by this method because their
> older child is in kindergarten, or almost there, and then they can start
> over with a baby
> 	 As far as carseats go, sometimes another year or half year between
> children can make the difference between traveling with two carseats or
> traveling with a carseat and a booster seat.  Unfortunately, in my case,
> this plan did not work out because, although Austin is plenty tall enough
> for a booster, he's still a couple of pounds under weight for one.  This
> means hauling around two car seats is our reality, at least for a little
> longer.  I do have to say I hire drivers more often than I used to in order
> to run errands.  Or, I wait to run them until both kids are at day care, or
> until at least Austin is out of the mix.  When traveling with both kids to
> run errands, a driver is nice because I can leave the car seats in the car.
> We can also go when the errands are done instead of having to wait for a
> ride.  Of course, it's a lot easier to travel with only Oriana on errands
> because I only have to deal with one car seat if I am by myself.  I
> certainly have hauled two car seats however.  I have a Sit 'N' Stroll, so
> Oriana uses it for her carseat.  This means I can pull her behind me, have
> Austin's car seat on my other arm, and still use my dog for short distances.
> There are also bags you can get so you can put a car seat over your shoulder
> or on your back.  If I had to do a lot of hauling of car seats, I would
> definitely invest in one of these.  Right now though, I am able to take the
> bus, walk, or hire drivers most of the time.
> 	We also have a wagon with two seats.  Austin usually likes to walk
> now, but if he gets tired it's nice to have a place for him to ride, and
> Oriana loves the wagon as well.  I also sometimes take Oriana in her
> backpack, depending on where we're going, and that leaves my hand free to
> hold Austin's hand.
> 	As far as keeping both children safe...  To me, this is not that
> different than keeping one child safe...  Although, of course, there are
> differences.  But it's just learning to listen for one child while
> interacting with the other, and/or doing the same thing with both
> children...  You develop techniques that work for you and your children.
> Certainly there is the issue with small toys.  Austin is very into Legos
> right now, and also a set called Motor Works which has plastic vehicles he
> can take apart and put back together.  All of these vehicles have small
> plastic screws Oriana could easily swallow.  So we have rules about where he
> can play with these toys, where they are stored, how quickly he has to pick
> them up when he's done with them, etc.  It's a little more difficult because
> Oriana has been trying to climb on all of the furniture lately, but this
> just means I need to be more in tune with Oriana, where she is, and what
> she's doing when I know these small toys are being played with.  Also, you
> have a few months to get used to your new baby and your new situation before
> that baby really starts moving around and getting into things.  Again, I
> think all of parenting is a learning process, and you figure things out as
> you go.
> 	Again, all parents who go from one child to two have questions.
> And, all parents have accidents happen to their children when they turn
> their back for that split second it takes to answer the phone, take
> something out of the oven, etc.  If you can, try to take blindness out of
> the mix for a while when you're deciding to have another child.  Do you have
> the finances to care for another child.  Do you have enough love to go
> around?  Do you want your son or daughter to have a sibling?  Also, think
> back to the questions and fears you had before you had your first child.
> I'm sure you had many--yet, things must be going very well if you are even
> talking about a second child, which means you've answered those questions
> and conqurred those fears.  I suspect you will have the same experience if
> you decide to take the jump and go for number two.
> 	Sorry for the long post, and thanks for reading if you've gotten
> this far.  I certainly do not have all of the answers, but I would be happy
> to talk to you any time off list or via phone if I can answer any questions
> for you.  My email is melissa at riccobono.us Good luck with this huge, and
> very personal decision!
> Melissa
>
>
> _______________________________________________
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> blparent at nfbnet.org
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> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
> blparent:
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> gic.com
>
>
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> ------------------------------
>
> Message: 4
> Date: Tue, 23 Aug 2011 16:59:43 -0500
> From: "Nikki" <daizies304 at comcast.net>
> To: "NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List" <blparent at nfbnet.org>
> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
> Message-ID: <01C9688C49824039BF8A45B17CBFDA9A at NicolePC>
> Content-Type: text/plain; format=flowed; charset="utf-8";
> 	reply-type=original
>
>             Hi Debbie.
> I feel as though I shouldn't have to prove my capabilities to my parents.
> It is MY son, isn't it?
> I shouldn't feel like I'm being controlled just because I live in their
> house, you know?
>
> Rebecca.
> I have a laptop and my parents respect my privacy, so no worries there.
> If anything were to come up, you can be certain I'll make sure they hear
> about it.
> I am the youngest of 2. My older brother lives with his family.
> As far as friends, I have a couple, but not going to talk to them about my
> feelings.
>
> V, my son constantly reminds me and my parents that I'm the boss.
> So, if he wants something and asks my mom, she tells him, "go ask your mom."
> I'm the one in charge.
>
> As far as my dad doing everything, I'm ashamed and embarrassed.
> I get frustrated when we're both in the kitchen, I get the milk and a glass.
> In the midst of what he's doing, stops and takes these items from me and
> pours the glass for me.
> Now, I'm able to do this myself and today, I told him, "what are you doing?
> I can do this myself."
> IDK what exactly he said, but I think he said,"I know." I asked him, "then
> why aren't you letting me do it myself?
> His response told me he has little or no confidence in me. He said, "I  just
> washed the counter. I don't want to clean it again."
> Do you know what that does to someone's self esteem?
>
> So, it's not so much me letting him do everything. His stress he has, is
> brought on by himself.
> I may need to fix some things with myself, but God and I are working on it.
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: Deborah Kent Stein
> Sent: Tuesday, August 23, 2011 12:12 PM
> To: NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List
> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
>
>
>
> Dear Nikki,
>
> Great news!  The more you take control, the more your folks are likely to
> see how capable you are.
>
> Debbie
>
> ----- Original Message -----
> From: "Nikki" <daizies304 at comcast.net>
> To: <blparent at nfbnet.org>
> Sent: Tuesday, August 23, 2011 10:03 AM
> Subject: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
>
>
>> Just an update...
>>
>>        Hi all.
>> I want to thank you all for the confidence boost.
>> My dad, son, and I went to meet the teacher yesterday.
>> I asked her if she could email me the handouts and I was very pleased to
>> find out that she would be happy to do it for me.
>> But my dad still requested the paper handouts for himself.
>> IDK why, but it was rather upsetting that he feels he has to be involved.
>>
>> Anyway, success!
>> Oh and I?m going to pick my son up from school, give my dad a break, lol.
>>
>> It?s confusing to me that my parents complain, mainly my dad, about having
>> to do everything, but when I take a stand, it back fires.
>> Meaning, it?s hard for him to accept me being independent.
>>
>> Nikki
>> _______________________________________________
>> blparent mailing list
>> blparent at nfbnet.org
>> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
>> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
>> blparent:
>> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/dkent5817%40att.net
>>
>
>
> _______________________________________________
> blparent mailing list
> blparent at nfbnet.org
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
> blparent:
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/daizies304%40comcast.net
>
>
>
>
> ------------------------------
>
> Message: 5
> Date: Tue, 23 Aug 2011 16:20:42 -0600
> From: "Veronica Smith" <madison_tewe at spinn.net>
> To: "'NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List'" <blparent at nfbnet.org>
> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
> Message-ID: <002201cc61e2$e5722cf0$b05686d0$@net>
> Content-Type: text/plain;	charset="utf-8"
>
> I agree, but sometimes it is best to have that printed copy of the
> assignment and yes, it would be nice for you to be in charge of your own
> life. haha
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org [mailto:blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org] On
> Behalf Of Nikki
> Sent: Tuesday, August 23, 2011 10:22 AM
> To: NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List
> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
>
>     Or there was the original plan for me to scan the paper, which is why I
> was able to get Open Book.
> I'm trying to decrease the amount of paper files I have and just go digital.
> So many other things to worry about.
> But I can understand.
> Need desperately to get out of here, haha.
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: Veronica Smith
> Sent: Tuesday, August 23, 2011 11:06 AM
> To: 'NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List'
> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
>
> It's hard for any parent to let go especially when you live with them.  Now
> if you lived by yourself, you would always be the one in charge.   I always
> took the paper version of every assignment as well as the emailed one.  It's
> good to have both, at least you can put the paper one in a file and if your
> like me, you can lose it. ha ha
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org [mailto:blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org] On
> Behalf Of Nikki
> Sent: Tuesday, August 23, 2011 9:04 AM
> To: blparent at nfbnet.org
> Subject: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
>
> Just an update...
>
>         Hi all.
> I want to thank you all for the confidence boost.
> My dad, son, and I went to meet the teacher yesterday.
> I asked her if she could email me the handouts and I was very pleased to
> find out that she would be happy to do it for me.
> But my dad still requested the paper handouts for himself.
> IDK why, but it was rather upsetting that he feels he has to be involved.
>
> Anyway, success!
> Oh and I?m going to pick my son up from school, give my dad a break, lol.
>
> It?s confusing to me that my parents complain, mainly my dad, about having
> to do everything, but when I take a stand, it back fires.
> Meaning, it?s hard for him to accept me being independent.
>
> Nikki
> _______________________________________________
> blparent mailing list
> blparent at nfbnet.org
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
> blparent:
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/madison_tewe%40spinn.net
>
>
> _______________________________________________
> blparent mailing list
> blparent at nfbnet.org
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
> blparent:
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/daizies304%40comcast.net
>
>
> _______________________________________________
> blparent mailing list
> blparent at nfbnet.org
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
> blparent:
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/madison_tewe%40spinn.net
>
>
>
>
> ------------------------------
>
> Message: 6
> Date: Tue, 23 Aug 2011 15:23:09 -0700
> From: "Amanda Winkler" <awcactuscat1 at hotmail.com>
> To: "NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List" <blparent at nfbnet.org>
> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
> Message-ID: <BLU156-ds13EB60196E0E592E7BC1708D2E0 at phx.gbl>
> Content-Type: text/plain; format=flowed; charset="utf-8";
> 	reply-type=response
>
> Nikki,
> In response to your dad pouring the glass of milk for you.  you might have
> said"Well I guess I'll have to clean up any mess I make and keep cleaning
> until I get it clean to your standards."  I am wondering have you ever taken
> Independent Living Skills at a learning center for the blind before?
>
> Amanda
>
> --------------------------------------------------
> From: "Nikki" <daizies304 at comcast.net>
> Sent: Tuesday, August 23, 2011 2:59 PM
> To: "NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List" <blparent at nfbnet.org>
> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
>
>>            Hi Debbie.
>> I feel as though I shouldn't have to prove my capabilities to my parents.
>> It is MY son, isn't it?
>> I shouldn't feel like I'm being controlled just because I live in their
>> house, you know?
>>
>> Rebecca.
>> I have a laptop and my parents respect my privacy, so no worries there.
>> If anything were to come up, you can be certain I'll make sure they hear
>> about it.
>> I am the youngest of 2. My older brother lives with his family.
>> As far as friends, I have a couple, but not going to talk to them about my
>> feelings.
>>
>> V, my son constantly reminds me and my parents that I'm the boss.
>> So, if he wants something and asks my mom, she tells him, "go ask your
>> mom."
>> I'm the one in charge.
>>
>> As far as my dad doing everything, I'm ashamed and embarrassed.
>> I get frustrated when we're both in the kitchen, I get the milk and a
>> glass.
>> In the midst of what he's doing, stops and takes these items from me and
>> pours the glass for me.
>> Now, I'm able to do this myself and today, I told him, "what are you
>> doing?
>> I can do this myself."
>> IDK what exactly he said, but I think he said,"I know." I asked him, "then
>>
>> why aren't you letting me do it myself?
>> His response told me he has little or no confidence in me. He said, "I
>> just washed the counter. I don't want to clean it again."
>> Do you know what that does to someone's self esteem?
>>
>> So, it's not so much me letting him do everything. His stress he has, is
>> brought on by himself.
>> I may need to fix some things with myself, but God and I are working on
>> it.
>>
>>
>>
>>
>>
>>
>>
>>
>>
>>
>> -----Original Message-----
>> From: Deborah Kent Stein
>> Sent: Tuesday, August 23, 2011 12:12 PM
>> To: NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List
>> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
>>
>>
>>
>> Dear Nikki,
>>
>> Great news!  The more you take control, the more your folks are likely to
>> see how capable you are.
>>
>> Debbie
>>
>> ----- Original Message -----
>> From: "Nikki" <daizies304 at comcast.net>
>> To: <blparent at nfbnet.org>
>> Sent: Tuesday, August 23, 2011 10:03 AM
>> Subject: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
>>
>>
>>> Just an update...
>>>
>>>        Hi all.
>>> I want to thank you all for the confidence boost.
>>> My dad, son, and I went to meet the teacher yesterday.
>>> I asked her if she could email me the handouts and I was very pleased to
>>> find out that she would be happy to do it for me.
>>> But my dad still requested the paper handouts for himself.
>>> IDK why, but it was rather upsetting that he feels he has to be involved.
>>>
>>> Anyway, success!
>>> Oh and I?m going to pick my son up from school, give my dad a break, lol.
>>>
>>> It?s confusing to me that my parents complain, mainly my dad, about
>>> having
>>> to do everything, but when I take a stand, it back fires.
>>> Meaning, it?s hard for him to accept me being independent.
>>>
>>> Nikki
>>> _______________________________________________
>>> blparent mailing list
>>> blparent at nfbnet.org
>>> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
>>> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
>>> blparent:
>>> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/dkent5817%40att.net
>>>
>>
>>
>> _______________________________________________
>> blparent mailing list
>> blparent at nfbnet.org
>> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
>> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
>> blparent:
>> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/daizies304%40comcast.net
>>
>> _______________________________________________
>> blparent mailing list
>> blparent at nfbnet.org
>> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
>> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
>> blparent:
>> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/awcactuscat1%40hotmail.com
>>
>
>
>
> ------------------------------
>
> Message: 7
> Date: Tue, 23 Aug 2011 15:24:12 -0700
> From: "Erin Rumer" <erinrumer at gmail.com>
> To: "'NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List'" <blparent at nfbnet.org>
> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
> Message-ID: <000f01cc61e3$63f828e0$2be87aa0$@gmail.com>
> Content-Type: text/plain;	charset="utf-8"
>
> Hello Nikky,
>
> You are completely right and I can only imagine the frustrations you're
> having with your dad, especially living under the same roof.  This is going
> to make you laugh because he reminds me of the mom Merry on the show
> Everyone Loves Raymond.  Thinks she's loving the family but totally
> controlling and condescending.  Well, just know as I'm sure you already do
> that it's your dad's insecurities about your blindness and not your in
> capabilities.  You'd think family would become more confident as the years
> go on, but sometimes those people get even deeper rooted in their goofy
> ways.  Keep killing him with kindness while being assertive and you might
> see a light at the end of that tunnel with him, no pun intended. GRIN
>
> Erin
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org [mailto:blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org] On
> Behalf Of Nikki
> Sent: Tuesday, August 23, 2011 3:00 PM
> To: NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List
> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
>
>             Hi Debbie.
> I feel as though I shouldn't have to prove my capabilities to my parents.
> It is MY son, isn't it?
> I shouldn't feel like I'm being controlled just because I live in their
> house, you know?
>
> Rebecca.
> I have a laptop and my parents respect my privacy, so no worries there.
> If anything were to come up, you can be certain I'll make sure they hear
> about it.
> I am the youngest of 2. My older brother lives with his family.
> As far as friends, I have a couple, but not going to talk to them about my
> feelings.
>
> V, my son constantly reminds me and my parents that I'm the boss.
> So, if he wants something and asks my mom, she tells him, "go ask your mom."
> I'm the one in charge.
>
> As far as my dad doing everything, I'm ashamed and embarrassed.
> I get frustrated when we're both in the kitchen, I get the milk and a glass.
> In the midst of what he's doing, stops and takes these items from me and
> pours the glass for me.
> Now, I'm able to do this myself and today, I told him, "what are you doing?
> I can do this myself."
> IDK what exactly he said, but I think he said,"I know." I asked him, "then
> why aren't you letting me do it myself?
> His response told me he has little or no confidence in me. He said, "I  just
> washed the counter. I don't want to clean it again."
> Do you know what that does to someone's self esteem?
>
> So, it's not so much me letting him do everything. His stress he has, is
> brought on by himself.
> I may need to fix some things with myself, but God and I are working on it.
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: Deborah Kent Stein
> Sent: Tuesday, August 23, 2011 12:12 PM
> To: NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List
> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
>
>
>
> Dear Nikki,
>
> Great news!  The more you take control, the more your folks are likely to
> see how capable you are.
>
> Debbie
>
> ----- Original Message -----
> From: "Nikki" <daizies304 at comcast.net>
> To: <blparent at nfbnet.org>
> Sent: Tuesday, August 23, 2011 10:03 AM
> Subject: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
>
>
>> Just an update...
>>
>>        Hi all.
>> I want to thank you all for the confidence boost.
>> My dad, son, and I went to meet the teacher yesterday.
>> I asked her if she could email me the handouts and I was very pleased to
>> find out that she would be happy to do it for me.
>> But my dad still requested the paper handouts for himself.
>> IDK why, but it was rather upsetting that he feels he has to be involved.
>>
>> Anyway, success!
>> Oh and I?m going to pick my son up from school, give my dad a break, lol.
>>
>> It?s confusing to me that my parents complain, mainly my dad, about having
>> to do everything, but when I take a stand, it back fires.
>> Meaning, it?s hard for him to accept me being independent.
>>
>> Nikki
>> _______________________________________________
>> blparent mailing list
>> blparent at nfbnet.org
>> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
>> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
>> blparent:
>> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/dkent5817%40att.net
>>
>
>
> _______________________________________________
> blparent mailing list
> blparent at nfbnet.org
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
> blparent:
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/daizies304%40comcast.net
>
>
> _______________________________________________
> blparent mailing list
> blparent at nfbnet.org
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
> blparent:
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/erinrumer%40gmail.com
>
>
>
>
> ------------------------------
>
> Message: 8
> Date: Tue, 23 Aug 2011 16:27:45 -0600
> From: "Veronica Smith" <madison_tewe at spinn.net>
> To: "'NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List'" <blparent at nfbnet.org>
> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
> Message-ID: <002301cc61e3$e1a13250$a4e396f0$@net>
> Content-Type: text/plain;	charset="utf-8"
>
> Nikki, I have faith in you and if I were you, I would say, "even sighted
> peeps make messes."  Next time, say no thank you to the glass and reach over
> and take control.  If you always let him, he will always be the same.
> Remember though, I am not perfect nor do I claim to be.  I know how parents
> are, my mom and dad tried to do it all for me, but I finally started just
> doing it and they finally saw that  I could.
> How abut your mom, does she try to do it all for you as well?  Like I said,
> Nikki, you can take control.  Tell dad thanks, but no thanks and if you do
> spill the milk, you and only you should be the one to clean up after
> yourself. V
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org [mailto:blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org] On
> Behalf Of Nikki
> Sent: Tuesday, August 23, 2011 4:00 PM
> To: NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List
> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
>
>             Hi Debbie.
> I feel as though I shouldn't have to prove my capabilities to my parents.
> It is MY son, isn't it?
> I shouldn't feel like I'm being controlled just because I live in their
> house, you know?
>
> Rebecca.
> I have a laptop and my parents respect my privacy, so no worries there.
> If anything were to come up, you can be certain I'll make sure they hear
> about it.
> I am the youngest of 2. My older brother lives with his family.
> As far as friends, I have a couple, but not going to talk to them about my
> feelings.
>
> V, my son constantly reminds me and my parents that I'm the boss.
> So, if he wants something and asks my mom, she tells him, "go ask your mom."
> I'm the one in charge.
>
> As far as my dad doing everything, I'm ashamed and embarrassed.
> I get frustrated when we're both in the kitchen, I get the milk and a glass.
> In the midst of what he's doing, stops and takes these items from me and
> pours the glass for me.
> Now, I'm able to do this myself and today, I told him, "what are you doing?
> I can do this myself."
> IDK what exactly he said, but I think he said,"I know." I asked him, "then
> why aren't you letting me do it myself?
> His response told me he has little or no confidence in me. He said, "I  just
> washed the counter. I don't want to clean it again."
> Do you know what that does to someone's self esteem?
>
> So, it's not so much me letting him do everything. His stress he has, is
> brought on by himself.
> I may need to fix some things with myself, but God and I are working on it.
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: Deborah Kent Stein
> Sent: Tuesday, August 23, 2011 12:12 PM
> To: NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List
> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
>
>
>
> Dear Nikki,
>
> Great news!  The more you take control, the more your folks are likely to
> see how capable you are.
>
> Debbie
>
> ----- Original Message -----
> From: "Nikki" <daizies304 at comcast.net>
> To: <blparent at nfbnet.org>
> Sent: Tuesday, August 23, 2011 10:03 AM
> Subject: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
>
>
>> Just an update...
>>
>>        Hi all.
>> I want to thank you all for the confidence boost.
>> My dad, son, and I went to meet the teacher yesterday.
>> I asked her if she could email me the handouts and I was very pleased to
>> find out that she would be happy to do it for me.
>> But my dad still requested the paper handouts for himself.
>> IDK why, but it was rather upsetting that he feels he has to be involved.
>>
>> Anyway, success!
>> Oh and I?m going to pick my son up from school, give my dad a break, lol.
>>
>> It?s confusing to me that my parents complain, mainly my dad, about having
>> to do everything, but when I take a stand, it back fires.
>> Meaning, it?s hard for him to accept me being independent.
>>
>> Nikki
>> _______________________________________________
>> blparent mailing list
>> blparent at nfbnet.org
>> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
>> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
>> blparent:
>> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/dkent5817%40att.net
>>
>
>
> _______________________________________________
> blparent mailing list
> blparent at nfbnet.org
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
> blparent:
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/daizies304%40comcast.net
>
>
> _______________________________________________
> blparent mailing list
> blparent at nfbnet.org
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
> blparent:
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/madison_tewe%40spinn.net
>
>
>
>
> ------------------------------
>
> Message: 9
> Date: Tue, 23 Aug 2011 15:31:13 -0700
> From: "Erin Rumer" <erinrumer at gmail.com>
> To: "'NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List'" <blparent at nfbnet.org>
> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
> Message-ID: <001001cc61e4$5fa81330$1ef83990$@gmail.com>
> Content-Type: text/plain;	charset="utf-8"
>
> Yes Nikky, tell your dad, "Haven't you heard the saying don't cry over spilt
> milk?" SMILING!
>
> Erin
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org [mailto:blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org] On
> Behalf Of Veronica Smith
> Sent: Tuesday, August 23, 2011 3:28 PM
> To: 'NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List'
> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
>
> Nikki, I have faith in you and if I were you, I would say, "even sighted
> peeps make messes."  Next time, say no thank you to the glass and reach over
> and take control.  If you always let him, he will always be the same.
> Remember though, I am not perfect nor do I claim to be.  I know how parents
> are, my mom and dad tried to do it all for me, but I finally started just
> doing it and they finally saw that  I could.
> How abut your mom, does she try to do it all for you as well?  Like I said,
> Nikki, you can take control.  Tell dad thanks, but no thanks and if you do
> spill the milk, you and only you should be the one to clean up after
> yourself. V
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org [mailto:blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org] On
> Behalf Of Nikki
> Sent: Tuesday, August 23, 2011 4:00 PM
> To: NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List
> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
>
>             Hi Debbie.
> I feel as though I shouldn't have to prove my capabilities to my parents.
> It is MY son, isn't it?
> I shouldn't feel like I'm being controlled just because I live in their
> house, you know?
>
> Rebecca.
> I have a laptop and my parents respect my privacy, so no worries there.
> If anything were to come up, you can be certain I'll make sure they hear
> about it.
> I am the youngest of 2. My older brother lives with his family.
> As far as friends, I have a couple, but not going to talk to them about my
> feelings.
>
> V, my son constantly reminds me and my parents that I'm the boss.
> So, if he wants something and asks my mom, she tells him, "go ask your mom."
> I'm the one in charge.
>
> As far as my dad doing everything, I'm ashamed and embarrassed.
> I get frustrated when we're both in the kitchen, I get the milk and a glass.
> In the midst of what he's doing, stops and takes these items from me and
> pours the glass for me.
> Now, I'm able to do this myself and today, I told him, "what are you doing?
> I can do this myself."
> IDK what exactly he said, but I think he said,"I know." I asked him, "then
> why aren't you letting me do it myself?
> His response told me he has little or no confidence in me. He said, "I  just
> washed the counter. I don't want to clean it again."
> Do you know what that does to someone's self esteem?
>
> So, it's not so much me letting him do everything. His stress he has, is
> brought on by himself.
> I may need to fix some things with myself, but God and I are working on it.
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: Deborah Kent Stein
> Sent: Tuesday, August 23, 2011 12:12 PM
> To: NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List
> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
>
>
>
> Dear Nikki,
>
> Great news!  The more you take control, the more your folks are likely to
> see how capable you are.
>
> Debbie
>
> ----- Original Message -----
> From: "Nikki" <daizies304 at comcast.net>
> To: <blparent at nfbnet.org>
> Sent: Tuesday, August 23, 2011 10:03 AM
> Subject: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
>
>
>> Just an update...
>>
>>        Hi all.
>> I want to thank you all for the confidence boost.
>> My dad, son, and I went to meet the teacher yesterday.
>> I asked her if she could email me the handouts and I was very pleased to
>> find out that she would be happy to do it for me.
>> But my dad still requested the paper handouts for himself.
>> IDK why, but it was rather upsetting that he feels he has to be involved.
>>
>> Anyway, success!
>> Oh and I?m going to pick my son up from school, give my dad a break, lol.
>>
>> It?s confusing to me that my parents complain, mainly my dad, about having
>> to do everything, but when I take a stand, it back fires.
>> Meaning, it?s hard for him to accept me being independent.
>>
>> Nikki
>> _______________________________________________
>> blparent mailing list
>> blparent at nfbnet.org
>> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
>> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
>> blparent:
>> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/dkent5817%40att.net
>>
>
>
> _______________________________________________
> blparent mailing list
> blparent at nfbnet.org
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
> blparent:
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/daizies304%40comcast.net
>
>
> _______________________________________________
> blparent mailing list
> blparent at nfbnet.org
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
> blparent:
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/madison_tewe%40spinn.net
>
>
> _______________________________________________
> blparent mailing list
> blparent at nfbnet.org
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
> blparent:
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/erinrumer%40gmail.com
>
>
>
>
> ------------------------------
>
> Message: 10
> Date: Tue, 23 Aug 2011 15:59:20 -0700
> From: "Chad Allen" <chad at chadallenmagic.com>
> To: "'NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List'" <blparent at nfbnet.org>
> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
> Message-ID: <002101cc61e8$4be57e60$e3b07b20$@com>
> Content-Type: text/plain;	charset="utf-8"
>
> Someone mentioned Rehab training on this string. I would like to put it out
> there that I am a graduate of the Colorado Center for the Blind and the
> training changed my life in so many ways. If anyone ever wants to discuss
> what it means to be a graduate of an NFB training center, , I'd be glad to
> answer any questions.
>
>
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org [mailto:blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org] On
> Behalf Of Veronica Smith
> Sent: Tuesday, August 23, 2011 3:28 PM
> To: 'NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List'
> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
>
> Nikki, I have faith in you and if I were you, I would say, "even sighted
> peeps make messes."  Next time, say no thank you to the glass and reach over
> and take control.  If you always let him, he will always be the same.
> Remember though, I am not perfect nor do I claim to be.  I know how parents
> are, my mom and dad tried to do it all for me, but I finally started just
> doing it and they finally saw that  I could.
> How abut your mom, does she try to do it all for you as well?  Like I said,
> Nikki, you can take control.  Tell dad thanks, but no thanks and if you do
> spill the milk, you and only you should be the one to clean up after
> yourself. V
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org [mailto:blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org] On
> Behalf Of Nikki
> Sent: Tuesday, August 23, 2011 4:00 PM
> To: NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List
> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
>
>             Hi Debbie.
> I feel as though I shouldn't have to prove my capabilities to my parents.
> It is MY son, isn't it?
> I shouldn't feel like I'm being controlled just because I live in their
> house, you know?
>
> Rebecca.
> I have a laptop and my parents respect my privacy, so no worries there.
> If anything were to come up, you can be certain I'll make sure they hear
> about it.
> I am the youngest of 2. My older brother lives with his family.
> As far as friends, I have a couple, but not going to talk to them about my
> feelings.
>
> V, my son constantly reminds me and my parents that I'm the boss.
> So, if he wants something and asks my mom, she tells him, "go ask your mom."
> I'm the one in charge.
>
> As far as my dad doing everything, I'm ashamed and embarrassed.
> I get frustrated when we're both in the kitchen, I get the milk and a glass.
> In the midst of what he's doing, stops and takes these items from me and
> pours the glass for me.
> Now, I'm able to do this myself and today, I told him, "what are you doing?
> I can do this myself."
> IDK what exactly he said, but I think he said,"I know." I asked him, "then
> why aren't you letting me do it myself?
> His response told me he has little or no confidence in me. He said, "I  just
> washed the counter. I don't want to clean it again."
> Do you know what that does to someone's self esteem?
>
> So, it's not so much me letting him do everything. His stress he has, is
> brought on by himself.
> I may need to fix some things with myself, but God and I are working on it.
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: Deborah Kent Stein
> Sent: Tuesday, August 23, 2011 12:12 PM
> To: NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List
> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
>
>
>
> Dear Nikki,
>
> Great news!  The more you take control, the more your folks are likely to
> see how capable you are.
>
> Debbie
>
> ----- Original Message -----
> From: "Nikki" <daizies304 at comcast.net>
> To: <blparent at nfbnet.org>
> Sent: Tuesday, August 23, 2011 10:03 AM
> Subject: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
>
>
>> Just an update...
>>
>>        Hi all.
>> I want to thank you all for the confidence boost.
>> My dad, son, and I went to meet the teacher yesterday.
>> I asked her if she could email me the handouts and I was very pleased to
>> find out that she would be happy to do it for me.
>> But my dad still requested the paper handouts for himself.
>> IDK why, but it was rather upsetting that he feels he has to be involved.
>>
>> Anyway, success!
>> Oh and I?m going to pick my son up from school, give my dad a break, lol.
>>
>> It?s confusing to me that my parents complain, mainly my dad, about having
>> to do everything, but when I take a stand, it back fires.
>> Meaning, it?s hard for him to accept me being independent.
>>
>> Nikki
>> _______________________________________________
>> blparent mailing list
>> blparent at nfbnet.org
>> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
>> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
>> blparent:
>> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/dkent5817%40att.net
>>
>
>
> _______________________________________________
> blparent mailing list
> blparent at nfbnet.org
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
> blparent:
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/daizies304%40comcast.net
>
>
> _______________________________________________
> blparent mailing list
> blparent at nfbnet.org
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
> blparent:
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/madison_tewe%40spinn.net
>
>
> _______________________________________________
> blparent mailing list
> blparent at nfbnet.org
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
> blparent:
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/chad%40chadallenmagic.com
>
>
>
>
> ------------------------------
>
> Message: 11
> Date: Tue, 23 Aug 2011 18:50:52 -0500
> From: "Brandy W" <branlw at sbcglobal.net>
> To: "NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List" <blparent at nfbnet.org>
> Subject: Re: [blparent] [Bulk]  school teacher - not an issue
> Message-ID: <90EB765F37E14C53A3479C365F888218 at Brandy>
> Content-Type: text/plain; format=flowed; charset="UTF-8";
> 	reply-type=original
>
> Well I'm glad to hear you are making progress with your dad, but really
> who's child is this? You need the handouts for your son not your dad. I
> would insist on picking him up, and there for you talk with teacher and all
> that parenting kind of stuff. Good luck with a good year!
>
> Bran
>
>
>
> "When we treat children's play as seriously as it deserves, we are helping
> them feel the joy that's to be found in the creative spirit. It's the things
> we play with and the people who help us play that make a great difference in
> our lives."
> ? Fred Rogers
>
> Brandy Wojcik
> Discovery Toys Educational Consultant and Team Leader
> www.playtoachieve.com
> (512) 689-5045
>
> Looking for team members nation wide!
> ----- Original Message -----
> From: "Nikki" <daizies304 at comcast.net>
> To: <blparent at nfbnet.org>
> Sent: Tuesday, August 23, 2011 10:03 AM
> Subject: [Bulk] [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
>
>
>> Just an update...
>>
>>        Hi all.
>> I want to thank you all for the confidence boost.
>> My dad, son, and I went to meet the teacher yesterday.
>> I asked her if she could email me the handouts and I was very pleased to
>> find out that she would be happy to do it for me.
>> But my dad still requested the paper handouts for himself.
>> IDK why, but it was rather upsetting that he feels he has to be involved.
>>
>> Anyway, success!
>> Oh and I?m going to pick my son up from school, give my dad a break, lol.
>>
>> It?s confusing to me that my parents complain, mainly my dad, about having
>>
>> to do everything, but when I take a stand, it back fires.
>> Meaning, it?s hard for him to accept me being independent.
>>
>> Nikki
>> _______________________________________________
>> blparent mailing list
>> blparent at nfbnet.org
>> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
>> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
>> blparent:
>> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/branlw%40sbcglobal.net
>>
>
>
>
>
> ------------------------------
>
> Message: 12
> Date: Tue, 23 Aug 2011 19:55:46 -0600
> From: "Veronica Smith" <madison_tewe at spinn.net>
> To: "'NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List'" <blparent at nfbnet.org>
> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
> Message-ID: <000801cc6200$f1209c30$d361d490$@net>
> Content-Type: text/plain;	charset="utf-8"
>
> I, too, am a graduate of a training center.  The best thing that ever
> happened to me. v
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org [mailto:blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org] On
> Behalf Of Chad Allen
> Sent: Tuesday, August 23, 2011 4:59 PM
> To: 'NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List'
> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
>
> Someone mentioned Rehab training on this string. I would like to put it out
> there that I am a graduate of the Colorado Center for the Blind and the
> training changed my life in so many ways. If anyone ever wants to discuss
> what it means to be a graduate of an NFB training center, , I'd be glad to
> answer any questions.
>
>
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org [mailto:blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org] On
> Behalf Of Veronica Smith
> Sent: Tuesday, August 23, 2011 3:28 PM
> To: 'NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List'
> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
>
> Nikki, I have faith in you and if I were you, I would say, "even sighted
> peeps make messes."  Next time, say no thank you to the glass and reach over
> and take control.  If you always let him, he will always be the same.
> Remember though, I am not perfect nor do I claim to be.  I know how parents
> are, my mom and dad tried to do it all for me, but I finally started just
> doing it and they finally saw that  I could.
> How abut your mom, does she try to do it all for you as well?  Like I said,
> Nikki, you can take control.  Tell dad thanks, but no thanks and if you do
> spill the milk, you and only you should be the one to clean up after
> yourself. V
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org [mailto:blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org] On
> Behalf Of Nikki
> Sent: Tuesday, August 23, 2011 4:00 PM
> To: NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List
> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
>
>             Hi Debbie.
> I feel as though I shouldn't have to prove my capabilities to my parents.
> It is MY son, isn't it?
> I shouldn't feel like I'm being controlled just because I live in their
> house, you know?
>
> Rebecca.
> I have a laptop and my parents respect my privacy, so no worries there.
> If anything were to come up, you can be certain I'll make sure they hear
> about it.
> I am the youngest of 2. My older brother lives with his family.
> As far as friends, I have a couple, but not going to talk to them about my
> feelings.
>
> V, my son constantly reminds me and my parents that I'm the boss.
> So, if he wants something and asks my mom, she tells him, "go ask your mom."
> I'm the one in charge.
>
> As far as my dad doing everything, I'm ashamed and embarrassed.
> I get frustrated when we're both in the kitchen, I get the milk and a glass.
> In the midst of what he's doing, stops and takes these items from me and
> pours the glass for me.
> Now, I'm able to do this myself and today, I told him, "what are you doing?
> I can do this myself."
> IDK what exactly he said, but I think he said,"I know." I asked him, "then
> why aren't you letting me do it myself?
> His response told me he has little or no confidence in me. He said, "I  just
> washed the counter. I don't want to clean it again."
> Do you know what that does to someone's self esteem?
>
> So, it's not so much me letting him do everything. His stress he has, is
> brought on by himself.
> I may need to fix some things with myself, but God and I are working on it.
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: Deborah Kent Stein
> Sent: Tuesday, August 23, 2011 12:12 PM
> To: NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List
> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
>
>
>
> Dear Nikki,
>
> Great news!  The more you take control, the more your folks are likely to
> see how capable you are.
>
> Debbie
>
> ----- Original Message -----
> From: "Nikki" <daizies304 at comcast.net>
> To: <blparent at nfbnet.org>
> Sent: Tuesday, August 23, 2011 10:03 AM
> Subject: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
>
>
>> Just an update...
>>
>>        Hi all.
>> I want to thank you all for the confidence boost.
>> My dad, son, and I went to meet the teacher yesterday.
>> I asked her if she could email me the handouts and I was very pleased to
>> find out that she would be happy to do it for me.
>> But my dad still requested the paper handouts for himself.
>> IDK why, but it was rather upsetting that he feels he has to be involved.
>>
>> Anyway, success!
>> Oh and I?m going to pick my son up from school, give my dad a break, lol.
>>
>> It?s confusing to me that my parents complain, mainly my dad, about having
>> to do everything, but when I take a stand, it back fires.
>> Meaning, it?s hard for him to accept me being independent.
>>
>> Nikki
>> _______________________________________________
>> blparent mailing list
>> blparent at nfbnet.org
>> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
>> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
>> blparent:
>> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/dkent5817%40att.net
>>
>
>
> _______________________________________________
> blparent mailing list
> blparent at nfbnet.org
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
> blparent:
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/daizies304%40comcast.net
>
>
> _______________________________________________
> blparent mailing list
> blparent at nfbnet.org
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
> blparent:
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/madison_tewe%40spinn.net
>
>
> _______________________________________________
> blparent mailing list
> blparent at nfbnet.org
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
> blparent:
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/chad%40chadallenmagic.com
>
>
> _______________________________________________
> blparent mailing list
> blparent at nfbnet.org
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
> blparent:
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/madison_tewe%40spinn.net
>
>
>
>
> ------------------------------
>
> Message: 13
> Date: Tue, 23 Aug 2011 21:03:52 -0500
> From: "Nikki" <daizies304 at comcast.net>
> To: "NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List" <blparent at nfbnet.org>
> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
> Message-ID: <FFF688F7B6554AF9836AF2D0E41F296B at NicolePC>
> Content-Type: text/plain; format=flowed; charset="utf-8";
> 	reply-type=response
>
>     No Amanda, I have not.
> Let me tell you why.
> I was diagnosed with RP at age 3.
> It is a progressive blindness.
> I was given chores to do around the house, as I grew up.
> So, I learned things by watching my mom or dad.
>
> As I got older though, my vision began deteriorating.
> So my dad modified the washer and dryer because I wanted to do my own
> laundry, plus my dad shrunk some of my shirts, lol.
> I would vaccume, dust, have KP occasionally.
> I was only able to make simple things to eat, like, grilled cheese, mac and
> cheese, soup, microwavable things.
> I used to make cookies with ease.
> Now, I have trouble cutting bread, spreading PB, jelly, or mayo on bread,
> when it used to be not a problem.
> I have trouble with putting in and taking out cookie trays from the oven,
> now, so I don't bake as much as I used to.
>
> Now, I can just hear my dad saying, "why do you feel like you have to do
> that when you have me here to help you."
>
> Um, I couldn't say anything because my dad is quick, sometimes I feel...
> um... can't think of the word, it's like I have be as quick or quicker even
> to meet my son's wants and because I can't, it leaves me feeling not
> worthless, but... that word...
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: Amanda Winkler
> Sent: Tuesday, August 23, 2011 5:23 PM
> To: NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List
> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
>
> Nikki,
> In response to your dad pouring the glass of milk for you.  you might have
> said"Well I guess I'll have to clean up any mess I make and keep cleaning
> until I get it clean to your standards."  I am wondering have you ever taken
> Independent Living Skills at a learning center for the blind before?
>
> Amanda
>
> --------------------------------------------------
> From: "Nikki" <daizies304 at comcast.net>
> Sent: Tuesday, August 23, 2011 2:59 PM
> To: "NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List" <blparent at nfbnet.org>
> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
>
>>            Hi Debbie.
>> I feel as though I shouldn't have to prove my capabilities to my parents.
>> It is MY son, isn't it?
>> I shouldn't feel like I'm being controlled just because I live in their
>> house, you know?
>>
>> Rebecca.
>> I have a laptop and my parents respect my privacy, so no worries there.
>> If anything were to come up, you can be certain I'll make sure they hear
>> about it.
>> I am the youngest of 2. My older brother lives with his family.
>> As far as friends, I have a couple, but not going to talk to them about my
>> feelings.
>>
>> V, my son constantly reminds me and my parents that I'm the boss.
>> So, if he wants something and asks my mom, she tells him, "go ask your
>> mom."
>> I'm the one in charge.
>>
>> As far as my dad doing everything, I'm ashamed and embarrassed.
>> I get frustrated when we're both in the kitchen, I get the milk and a
>> glass.
>> In the midst of what he's doing, stops and takes these items from me and
>> pours the glass for me.
>> Now, I'm able to do this myself and today, I told him, "what are you
>> doing?
>> I can do this myself."
>> IDK what exactly he said, but I think he said,"I know." I asked him, "then
>>
>> why aren't you letting me do it myself?
>> His response told me he has little or no confidence in me. He said, "I
>> just washed the counter. I don't want to clean it again."
>> Do you know what that does to someone's self esteem?
>>
>> So, it's not so much me letting him do everything. His stress he has, is
>> brought on by himself.
>> I may need to fix some things with myself, but God and I are working on
>> it.
>>
>>
>>
>>
>>
>>
>>
>>
>>
>>
>> -----Original Message-----
>> From: Deborah Kent Stein
>> Sent: Tuesday, August 23, 2011 12:12 PM
>> To: NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List
>> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
>>
>>
>>
>> Dear Nikki,
>>
>> Great news!  The more you take control, the more your folks are likely to
>> see how capable you are.
>>
>> Debbie
>>
>> ----- Original Message -----
>> From: "Nikki" <daizies304 at comcast.net>
>> To: <blparent at nfbnet.org>
>> Sent: Tuesday, August 23, 2011 10:03 AM
>> Subject: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
>>
>>
>>> Just an update...
>>>
>>>        Hi all.
>>> I want to thank you all for the confidence boost.
>>> My dad, son, and I went to meet the teacher yesterday.
>>> I asked her if she could email me the handouts and I was very pleased to
>>> find out that she would be happy to do it for me.
>>> But my dad still requested the paper handouts for himself.
>>> IDK why, but it was rather upsetting that he feels he has to be involved.
>>>
>>> Anyway, success!
>>> Oh and I?m going to pick my son up from school, give my dad a break, lol.
>>>
>>> It?s confusing to me that my parents complain, mainly my dad, about
>>> having
>>> to do everything, but when I take a stand, it back fires.
>>> Meaning, it?s hard for him to accept me being independent.
>>>
>>> Nikki
>>> _______________________________________________
>>> blparent mailing list
>>> blparent at nfbnet.org
>>> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
>>> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
>>> blparent:
>>> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/dkent5817%40att.net
>>>
>>
>>
>> _______________________________________________
>> blparent mailing list
>> blparent at nfbnet.org
>> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
>> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
>> blparent:
>> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/daizies304%40comcast.net
>>
>> _______________________________________________
>> blparent mailing list
>> blparent at nfbnet.org
>> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
>> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
>> blparent:
>> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/awcactuscat1%40hotmail.com
>>
>
> _______________________________________________
> blparent mailing list
> blparent at nfbnet.org
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
> blparent:
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/daizies304%40comcast.net
>
>
>
>
> ------------------------------
>
> Message: 14
> Date: Tue, 23 Aug 2011 21:07:12 -0500
> From: "Nikki" <daizies304 at comcast.net>
> To: "NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List" <blparent at nfbnet.org>
> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
> Message-ID: <8425E06C687846938EAE568B32B16CB7 at NicolePC>
> Content-Type: text/plain; format=flowed; charset="utf-8";
> 	reply-type=original
>
>     Thanks Erin.
> I can totally see his insecurities.
>
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: Erin Rumer
> Sent: Tuesday, August 23, 2011 5:24 PM
> To: 'NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List'
> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
>
> Hello Nikky,
>
> You are completely right and I can only imagine the frustrations you're
> having with your dad, especially living under the same roof.  This is going
> to make you laugh because he reminds me of the mom Merry on the show
> Everyone Loves Raymond.  Thinks she's loving the family but totally
> controlling and condescending.  Well, just know as I'm sure you already do
> that it's your dad's insecurities about your blindness and not your in
> capabilities.  You'd think family would become more confident as the years
> go on, but sometimes those people get even deeper rooted in their goofy
> ways.  Keep killing him with kindness while being assertive and you might
> see a light at the end of that tunnel with him, no pun intended. GRIN
>
> Erin
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org [mailto:blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org] On
> Behalf Of Nikki
> Sent: Tuesday, August 23, 2011 3:00 PM
> To: NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List
> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
>
>             Hi Debbie.
> I feel as though I shouldn't have to prove my capabilities to my parents.
> It is MY son, isn't it?
> I shouldn't feel like I'm being controlled just because I live in their
> house, you know?
>
> Rebecca.
> I have a laptop and my parents respect my privacy, so no worries there.
> If anything were to come up, you can be certain I'll make sure they hear
> about it.
> I am the youngest of 2. My older brother lives with his family.
> As far as friends, I have a couple, but not going to talk to them about my
> feelings.
>
> V, my son constantly reminds me and my parents that I'm the boss.
> So, if he wants something and asks my mom, she tells him, "go ask your mom."
> I'm the one in charge.
>
> As far as my dad doing everything, I'm ashamed and embarrassed.
> I get frustrated when we're both in the kitchen, I get the milk and a glass.
> In the midst of what he's doing, stops and takes these items from me and
> pours the glass for me.
> Now, I'm able to do this myself and today, I told him, "what are you doing?
> I can do this myself."
> IDK what exactly he said, but I think he said,"I know." I asked him, "then
> why aren't you letting me do it myself?
> His response told me he has little or no confidence in me. He said, "I  just
> washed the counter. I don't want to clean it again."
> Do you know what that does to someone's self esteem?
>
> So, it's not so much me letting him do everything. His stress he has, is
> brought on by himself.
> I may need to fix some things with myself, but God and I are working on it.
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: Deborah Kent Stein
> Sent: Tuesday, August 23, 2011 12:12 PM
> To: NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List
> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
>
>
>
> Dear Nikki,
>
> Great news!  The more you take control, the more your folks are likely to
> see how capable you are.
>
> Debbie
>
> ----- Original Message -----
> From: "Nikki" <daizies304 at comcast.net>
> To: <blparent at nfbnet.org>
> Sent: Tuesday, August 23, 2011 10:03 AM
> Subject: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
>
>
>> Just an update...
>>
>>        Hi all.
>> I want to thank you all for the confidence boost.
>> My dad, son, and I went to meet the teacher yesterday.
>> I asked her if she could email me the handouts and I was very pleased to
>> find out that she would be happy to do it for me.
>> But my dad still requested the paper handouts for himself.
>> IDK why, but it was rather upsetting that he feels he has to be involved.
>>
>> Anyway, success!
>> Oh and I?m going to pick my son up from school, give my dad a break, lol.
>>
>> It?s confusing to me that my parents complain, mainly my dad, about having
>> to do everything, but when I take a stand, it back fires.
>> Meaning, it?s hard for him to accept me being independent.
>>
>> Nikki
>> _______________________________________________
>> blparent mailing list
>> blparent at nfbnet.org
>> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
>> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
>> blparent:
>> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/dkent5817%40att.net
>>
>
>
> _______________________________________________
> blparent mailing list
> blparent at nfbnet.org
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
> blparent:
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/daizies304%40comcast.net
>
>
> _______________________________________________
> blparent mailing list
> blparent at nfbnet.org
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
> blparent:
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/erinrumer%40gmail.com
>
>
> _______________________________________________
> blparent mailing list
> blparent at nfbnet.org
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
> blparent:
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/daizies304%40comcast.net
>
>
>
>
> ------------------------------
>
> Message: 15
> Date: Tue, 23 Aug 2011 21:09:13 -0500
> From: "Nikki" <daizies304 at comcast.net>
> To: "NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List" <blparent at nfbnet.org>
> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
> Message-ID: <E4D0A03A6ABE4883A6C278B0BBD66C66 at NicolePC>
> Content-Type: text/plain; format=flowed; charset="utf-8";
> 	reply-type=original
>
>     Oh wow!
> Thanks V.
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: Veronica Smith
> Sent: Tuesday, August 23, 2011 5:27 PM
> To: 'NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List'
> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
>
> Nikki, I have faith in you and if I were you, I would say, "even sighted
> peeps make messes."  Next time, say no thank you to the glass and reach over
> and take control.  If you always let him, he will always be the same.
> Remember though, I am not perfect nor do I claim to be.  I know how parents
> are, my mom and dad tried to do it all for me, but I finally started just
> doing it and they finally saw that  I could.
> How abut your mom, does she try to do it all for you as well?  Like I said,
> Nikki, you can take control.  Tell dad thanks, but no thanks and if you do
> spill the milk, you and only you should be the one to clean up after
> yourself. V
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org [mailto:blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org] On
> Behalf Of Nikki
> Sent: Tuesday, August 23, 2011 4:00 PM
> To: NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List
> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
>
>             Hi Debbie.
> I feel as though I shouldn't have to prove my capabilities to my parents.
> It is MY son, isn't it?
> I shouldn't feel like I'm being controlled just because I live in their
> house, you know?
>
> Rebecca.
> I have a laptop and my parents respect my privacy, so no worries there.
> If anything were to come up, you can be certain I'll make sure they hear
> about it.
> I am the youngest of 2. My older brother lives with his family.
> As far as friends, I have a couple, but not going to talk to them about my
> feelings.
>
> V, my son constantly reminds me and my parents that I'm the boss.
> So, if he wants something and asks my mom, she tells him, "go ask your mom."
> I'm the one in charge.
>
> As far as my dad doing everything, I'm ashamed and embarrassed.
> I get frustrated when we're both in the kitchen, I get the milk and a glass.
> In the midst of what he's doing, stops and takes these items from me and
> pours the glass for me.
> Now, I'm able to do this myself and today, I told him, "what are you doing?
> I can do this myself."
> IDK what exactly he said, but I think he said,"I know." I asked him, "then
> why aren't you letting me do it myself?
> His response told me he has little or no confidence in me. He said, "I  just
> washed the counter. I don't want to clean it again."
> Do you know what that does to someone's self esteem?
>
> So, it's not so much me letting him do everything. His stress he has, is
> brought on by himself.
> I may need to fix some things with myself, but God and I are working on it.
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: Deborah Kent Stein
> Sent: Tuesday, August 23, 2011 12:12 PM
> To: NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List
> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
>
>
>
> Dear Nikki,
>
> Great news!  The more you take control, the more your folks are likely to
> see how capable you are.
>
> Debbie
>
> ----- Original Message -----
> From: "Nikki" <daizies304 at comcast.net>
> To: <blparent at nfbnet.org>
> Sent: Tuesday, August 23, 2011 10:03 AM
> Subject: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
>
>
>> Just an update...
>>
>>        Hi all.
>> I want to thank you all for the confidence boost.
>> My dad, son, and I went to meet the teacher yesterday.
>> I asked her if she could email me the handouts and I was very pleased to
>> find out that she would be happy to do it for me.
>> But my dad still requested the paper handouts for himself.
>> IDK why, but it was rather upsetting that he feels he has to be involved.
>>
>> Anyway, success!
>> Oh and I?m going to pick my son up from school, give my dad a break, lol.
>>
>> It?s confusing to me that my parents complain, mainly my dad, about having
>> to do everything, but when I take a stand, it back fires.
>> Meaning, it?s hard for him to accept me being independent.
>>
>> Nikki
>> _______________________________________________
>> blparent mailing list
>> blparent at nfbnet.org
>> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
>> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
>> blparent:
>> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/dkent5817%40att.net
>>
>
>
> _______________________________________________
> blparent mailing list
> blparent at nfbnet.org
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
> blparent:
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/daizies304%40comcast.net
>
>
> _______________________________________________
> blparent mailing list
> blparent at nfbnet.org
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
> blparent:
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/madison_tewe%40spinn.net
>
>
> _______________________________________________
> blparent mailing list
> blparent at nfbnet.org
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
> blparent:
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/daizies304%40comcast.net
>
>
>
>
> ------------------------------
>
> Message: 16
> Date: Tue, 23 Aug 2011 21:21:17 -0500
> From: "Nikki" <daizies304 at comcast.net>
> To: "NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List" <blparent at nfbnet.org>
> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
> Message-ID: <4208A4906D464C3AB46159EB39B56FD3 at NicolePC>
> Content-Type: text/plain; format=flowed; charset="utf-8";
> 	reply-type=original
>
>     Yes!
> I appreciate all the boosts of confidence, thank you.
> I will definitely be taking control, putting my foot down.
> And Yes, my mom steps in and does things for me, but she's different about
> it each time.
>
> Some days she'll ask and other days she won't realize what she did until
> after it's done, then she apologizes.
> But since I don't see her much, she can't really do anything for me.
> Besides, she wants me to be independent.
> It's my dad that has a hard time letting go.
>
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: Erin Rumer
> Sent: Tuesday, August 23, 2011 5:31 PM
> To: 'NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List'
> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
>
> Yes Nikky, tell your dad, "Haven't you heard the saying don't cry over spilt
> milk?" SMILING!
>
> Erin
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org [mailto:blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org] On
> Behalf Of Veronica Smith
> Sent: Tuesday, August 23, 2011 3:28 PM
> To: 'NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List'
> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
>
> Nikki, I have faith in you and if I were you, I would say, "even sighted
> peeps make messes."  Next time, say no thank you to the glass and reach over
> and take control.  If you always let him, he will always be the same.
> Remember though, I am not perfect nor do I claim to be.  I know how parents
> are, my mom and dad tried to do it all for me, but I finally started just
> doing it and they finally saw that  I could.
> How abut your mom, does she try to do it all for you as well?  Like I said,
> Nikki, you can take control.  Tell dad thanks, but no thanks and if you do
> spill the milk, you and only you should be the one to clean up after
> yourself. V
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org [mailto:blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org] On
> Behalf Of Nikki
> Sent: Tuesday, August 23, 2011 4:00 PM
> To: NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List
> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
>
>             Hi Debbie.
> I feel as though I shouldn't have to prove my capabilities to my parents.
> It is MY son, isn't it?
> I shouldn't feel like I'm being controlled just because I live in their
> house, you know?
>
> Rebecca.
> I have a laptop and my parents respect my privacy, so no worries there.
> If anything were to come up, you can be certain I'll make sure they hear
> about it.
> I am the youngest of 2. My older brother lives with his family.
> As far as friends, I have a couple, but not going to talk to them about my
> feelings.
>
> V, my son constantly reminds me and my parents that I'm the boss.
> So, if he wants something and asks my mom, she tells him, "go ask your mom."
> I'm the one in charge.
>
> As far as my dad doing everything, I'm ashamed and embarrassed.
> I get frustrated when we're both in the kitchen, I get the milk and a glass.
> In the midst of what he's doing, stops and takes these items from me and
> pours the glass for me.
> Now, I'm able to do this myself and today, I told him, "what are you doing?
> I can do this myself."
> IDK what exactly he said, but I think he said,"I know." I asked him, "then
> why aren't you letting me do it myself?
> His response told me he has little or no confidence in me. He said, "I  just
> washed the counter. I don't want to clean it again."
> Do you know what that does to someone's self esteem?
>
> So, it's not so much me letting him do everything. His stress he has, is
> brought on by himself.
> I may need to fix some things with myself, but God and I are working on it.
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: Deborah Kent Stein
> Sent: Tuesday, August 23, 2011 12:12 PM
> To: NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List
> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
>
>
>
> Dear Nikki,
>
> Great news!  The more you take control, the more your folks are likely to
> see how capable you are.
>
> Debbie
>
> ----- Original Message -----
> From: "Nikki" <daizies304 at comcast.net>
> To: <blparent at nfbnet.org>
> Sent: Tuesday, August 23, 2011 10:03 AM
> Subject: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
>
>
>> Just an update...
>>
>>        Hi all.
>> I want to thank you all for the confidence boost.
>> My dad, son, and I went to meet the teacher yesterday.
>> I asked her if she could email me the handouts and I was very pleased to
>> find out that she would be happy to do it for me.
>> But my dad still requested the paper handouts for himself.
>> IDK why, but it was rather upsetting that he feels he has to be involved.
>>
>> Anyway, success!
>> Oh and I?m going to pick my son up from school, give my dad a break, lol.
>>
>> It?s confusing to me that my parents complain, mainly my dad, about having
>> to do everything, but when I take a stand, it back fires.
>> Meaning, it?s hard for him to accept me being independent.
>>
>> Nikki
>> _______________________________________________
>> blparent mailing list
>> blparent at nfbnet.org
>> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
>> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
>> blparent:
>> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/dkent5817%40att.net
>>
>
>
> _______________________________________________
> blparent mailing list
> blparent at nfbnet.org
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
> blparent:
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/daizies304%40comcast.net
>
>
> _______________________________________________
> blparent mailing list
> blparent at nfbnet.org
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
> blparent:
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/madison_tewe%40spinn.net
>
>
> _______________________________________________
> blparent mailing list
> blparent at nfbnet.org
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
> blparent:
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/erinrumer%40gmail.com
>
>
> _______________________________________________
> blparent mailing list
> blparent at nfbnet.org
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
> blparent:
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/daizies304%40comcast.net
>
>
>
>
> ------------------------------
>
> Message: 17
> Date: Tue, 23 Aug 2011 21:26:34 -0500
> From: "Nikki" <daizies304 at comcast.net>
> To: "NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List" <blparent at nfbnet.org>
> Subject: Re: [blparent] [Bulk]  school teacher - not an issue
> Message-ID: <898425527A10429C83FF4C48CDC5160C at NicolePC>
> Content-Type: text/plain; format=flowed; charset="utf-8";
> 	reply-type=response
>
>     I agree.
> It is my child.
> I have offered or said that I'm going to be picking him up.
> Now the paperwork is another story.
> I really don't know what my dad's plan is.
>
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: Brandy W
> Sent: Tuesday, August 23, 2011 6:50 PM
> To: NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List
> Subject: Re: [blparent] [Bulk] school teacher - not an issue
>
> Well I'm glad to hear you are making progress with your dad, but really
> who's child is this? You need the handouts for your son not your dad. I
> would insist on picking him up, and there for you talk with teacher and all
> that parenting kind of stuff. Good luck with a good year!
>
> Bran
>
>
>
> "When we treat children's play as seriously as it deserves, we are helping
> them feel the joy that's to be found in the creative spirit. It's the things
> we play with and the people who help us play that make a great difference in
> our lives."
> ? Fred Rogers
>
> Brandy Wojcik
> Discovery Toys Educational Consultant and Team Leader
> www.playtoachieve.com
> (512) 689-5045
>
> Looking for team members nation wide!
> ----- Original Message -----
> From: "Nikki" <daizies304 at comcast.net>
> To: <blparent at nfbnet.org>
> Sent: Tuesday, August 23, 2011 10:03 AM
> Subject: [Bulk] [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
>
>
>> Just an update...
>>
>>        Hi all.
>> I want to thank you all for the confidence boost.
>> My dad, son, and I went to meet the teacher yesterday.
>> I asked her if she could email me the handouts and I was very pleased to
>> find out that she would be happy to do it for me.
>> But my dad still requested the paper handouts for himself.
>> IDK why, but it was rather upsetting that he feels he has to be involved.
>>
>> Anyway, success!
>> Oh and I?m going to pick my son up from school, give my dad a break, lol.
>>
>> It?s confusing to me that my parents complain, mainly my dad, about having
>>
>> to do everything, but when I take a stand, it back fires.
>> Meaning, it?s hard for him to accept me being independent.
>>
>> Nikki
>> _______________________________________________
>> blparent mailing list
>> blparent at nfbnet.org
>> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
>> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
>> blparent:
>> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/branlw%40sbcglobal.net
>>
>
>
> _______________________________________________
> blparent mailing list
> blparent at nfbnet.org
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
> blparent:
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/daizies304%40comcast.net
>
>
>
>
> ------------------------------
>
> Message: 18
> Date: Tue, 23 Aug 2011 19:39:52 -0700
> From: "Chad Allen" <chad at chadallenmagic.com>
> To: "'NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List'" <blparent at nfbnet.org>
> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
> Message-ID: <003d01cc6207$1aaf7020$500e5060$@com>
> Content-Type: text/plain;	charset="utf-8"
>
> Do you know about the Colorado Center for the Blind, BLIND Inc., and
> Louisiana Center for the Blind?
>
>
>
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org [mailto:blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org] On
> Behalf Of Nikki
> Sent: Tuesday, August 23, 2011 7:21 PM
> To: NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List
> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
>
>     Yes!
> I appreciate all the boosts of confidence, thank you.
> I will definitely be taking control, putting my foot down.
> And Yes, my mom steps in and does things for me, but she's different about
> it each time.
>
> Some days she'll ask and other days she won't realize what she did until
> after it's done, then she apologizes.
> But since I don't see her much, she can't really do anything for me.
> Besides, she wants me to be independent.
> It's my dad that has a hard time letting go.
>
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: Erin Rumer
> Sent: Tuesday, August 23, 2011 5:31 PM
> To: 'NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List'
> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
>
> Yes Nikky, tell your dad, "Haven't you heard the saying don't cry over spilt
> milk?" SMILING!
>
> Erin
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org [mailto:blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org] On
> Behalf Of Veronica Smith
> Sent: Tuesday, August 23, 2011 3:28 PM
> To: 'NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List'
> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
>
> Nikki, I have faith in you and if I were you, I would say, "even sighted
> peeps make messes."  Next time, say no thank you to the glass and reach over
> and take control.  If you always let him, he will always be the same.
> Remember though, I am not perfect nor do I claim to be.  I know how parents
> are, my mom and dad tried to do it all for me, but I finally started just
> doing it and they finally saw that  I could.
> How abut your mom, does she try to do it all for you as well?  Like I said,
> Nikki, you can take control.  Tell dad thanks, but no thanks and if you do
> spill the milk, you and only you should be the one to clean up after
> yourself. V
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org [mailto:blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org] On
> Behalf Of Nikki
> Sent: Tuesday, August 23, 2011 4:00 PM
> To: NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List
> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
>
>             Hi Debbie.
> I feel as though I shouldn't have to prove my capabilities to my parents.
> It is MY son, isn't it?
> I shouldn't feel like I'm being controlled just because I live in their
> house, you know?
>
> Rebecca.
> I have a laptop and my parents respect my privacy, so no worries there.
> If anything were to come up, you can be certain I'll make sure they hear
> about it.
> I am the youngest of 2. My older brother lives with his family.
> As far as friends, I have a couple, but not going to talk to them about my
> feelings.
>
> V, my son constantly reminds me and my parents that I'm the boss.
> So, if he wants something and asks my mom, she tells him, "go ask your mom."
> I'm the one in charge.
>
> As far as my dad doing everything, I'm ashamed and embarrassed.
> I get frustrated when we're both in the kitchen, I get the milk and a glass.
> In the midst of what he's doing, stops and takes these items from me and
> pours the glass for me.
> Now, I'm able to do this myself and today, I told him, "what are you doing?
> I can do this myself."
> IDK what exactly he said, but I think he said,"I know." I asked him, "then
> why aren't you letting me do it myself?
> His response told me he has little or no confidence in me. He said, "I  just
> washed the counter. I don't want to clean it again."
> Do you know what that does to someone's self esteem?
>
> So, it's not so much me letting him do everything. His stress he has, is
> brought on by himself.
> I may need to fix some things with myself, but God and I are working on it.
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: Deborah Kent Stein
> Sent: Tuesday, August 23, 2011 12:12 PM
> To: NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List
> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
>
>
>
> Dear Nikki,
>
> Great news!  The more you take control, the more your folks are likely to
> see how capable you are.
>
> Debbie
>
> ----- Original Message -----
> From: "Nikki" <daizies304 at comcast.net>
> To: <blparent at nfbnet.org>
> Sent: Tuesday, August 23, 2011 10:03 AM
> Subject: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
>
>
>> Just an update...
>>
>>        Hi all.
>> I want to thank you all for the confidence boost.
>> My dad, son, and I went to meet the teacher yesterday.
>> I asked her if she could email me the handouts and I was very pleased to
>> find out that she would be happy to do it for me.
>> But my dad still requested the paper handouts for himself.
>> IDK why, but it was rather upsetting that he feels he has to be involved.
>>
>> Anyway, success!
>> Oh and I?m going to pick my son up from school, give my dad a break, lol.
>>
>> It?s confusing to me that my parents complain, mainly my dad, about having
>> to do everything, but when I take a stand, it back fires.
>> Meaning, it?s hard for him to accept me being independent.
>>
>> Nikki
>> _______________________________________________
>> blparent mailing list
>> blparent at nfbnet.org
>> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
>> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
>> blparent:
>> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/dkent5817%40att.net
>>
>
>
> _______________________________________________
> blparent mailing list
> blparent at nfbnet.org
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
> blparent:
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/daizies304%40comcast.net
>
>
> _______________________________________________
> blparent mailing list
> blparent at nfbnet.org
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
> blparent:
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/madison_tewe%40spinn.net
>
>
> _______________________________________________
> blparent mailing list
> blparent at nfbnet.org
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
> blparent:
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/erinrumer%40gmail.com
>
>
> _______________________________________________
> blparent mailing list
> blparent at nfbnet.org
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
> blparent:
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/daizies304%40comcast.net
>
>
> _______________________________________________
> blparent mailing list
> blparent at nfbnet.org
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
> blparent:
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/chad%40chadallenmagic.com
>
>
>
>
> ------------------------------
>
> Message: 19
> Date: Tue, 23 Aug 2011 22:04:57 -0500
> From: "Nikki" <daizies304 at comcast.net>
> To: "NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List" <blparent at nfbnet.org>
> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
> Message-ID: <8E668E5CF2D0401BB75C46E7BD9748D4 at NicolePC>
> Content-Type: text/plain; format=flowed; charset="utf-8";
> 	reply-type=original
>
>     I didn't learn about LCB or LWSB until earlier this year.
> I mentioned wanting to go to LWSB to my DOHRS counselor, but she said
> something I forgot and was enough for me to drop the idea.
>
> Oh it had to do with money, how they're not going to send someone out of
> state if their not independent enough here, and that I could easily get
> trained here.
> IDK what that was all about, but I dropped the idea and never brought it up
> again.
>
>
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: Chad Allen
> Sent: Tuesday, August 23, 2011 9:39 PM
> To: 'NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List'
> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
>
> Do you know about the Colorado Center for the Blind, BLIND Inc., and
> Louisiana Center for the Blind?
>
>
>
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org [mailto:blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org] On
> Behalf Of Nikki
> Sent: Tuesday, August 23, 2011 7:21 PM
> To: NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List
> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
>
>     Yes!
> I appreciate all the boosts of confidence, thank you.
> I will definitely be taking control, putting my foot down.
> And Yes, my mom steps in and does things for me, but she's different about
> it each time.
>
> Some days she'll ask and other days she won't realize what she did until
> after it's done, then she apologizes.
> But since I don't see her much, she can't really do anything for me.
> Besides, she wants me to be independent.
> It's my dad that has a hard time letting go.
>
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: Erin Rumer
> Sent: Tuesday, August 23, 2011 5:31 PM
> To: 'NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List'
> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
>
> Yes Nikky, tell your dad, "Haven't you heard the saying don't cry over spilt
> milk?" SMILING!
>
> Erin
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org [mailto:blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org] On
> Behalf Of Veronica Smith
> Sent: Tuesday, August 23, 2011 3:28 PM
> To: 'NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List'
> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
>
> Nikki, I have faith in you and if I were you, I would say, "even sighted
> peeps make messes."  Next time, say no thank you to the glass and reach over
> and take control.  If you always let him, he will always be the same.
> Remember though, I am not perfect nor do I claim to be.  I know how parents
> are, my mom and dad tried to do it all for me, but I finally started just
> doing it and they finally saw that  I could.
> How abut your mom, does she try to do it all for you as well?  Like I said,
> Nikki, you can take control.  Tell dad thanks, but no thanks and if you do
> spill the milk, you and only you should be the one to clean up after
> yourself. V
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org [mailto:blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org] On
> Behalf Of Nikki
> Sent: Tuesday, August 23, 2011 4:00 PM
> To: NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List
> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
>
>             Hi Debbie.
> I feel as though I shouldn't have to prove my capabilities to my parents.
> It is MY son, isn't it?
> I shouldn't feel like I'm being controlled just because I live in their
> house, you know?
>
> Rebecca.
> I have a laptop and my parents respect my privacy, so no worries there.
> If anything were to come up, you can be certain I'll make sure they hear
> about it.
> I am the youngest of 2. My older brother lives with his family.
> As far as friends, I have a couple, but not going to talk to them about my
> feelings.
>
> V, my son constantly reminds me and my parents that I'm the boss.
> So, if he wants something and asks my mom, she tells him, "go ask your mom."
> I'm the one in charge.
>
> As far as my dad doing everything, I'm ashamed and embarrassed.
> I get frustrated when we're both in the kitchen, I get the milk and a glass.
> In the midst of what he's doing, stops and takes these items from me and
> pours the glass for me.
> Now, I'm able to do this myself and today, I told him, "what are you doing?
> I can do this myself."
> IDK what exactly he said, but I think he said,"I know." I asked him, "then
> why aren't you letting me do it myself?
> His response told me he has little or no confidence in me. He said, "I  just
> washed the counter. I don't want to clean it again."
> Do you know what that does to someone's self esteem?
>
> So, it's not so much me letting him do everything. His stress he has, is
> brought on by himself.
> I may need to fix some things with myself, but God and I are working on it.
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: Deborah Kent Stein
> Sent: Tuesday, August 23, 2011 12:12 PM
> To: NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List
> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
>
>
>
> Dear Nikki,
>
> Great news!  The more you take control, the more your folks are likely to
> see how capable you are.
>
> Debbie
>
> ----- Original Message -----
> From: "Nikki" <daizies304 at comcast.net>
> To: <blparent at nfbnet.org>
> Sent: Tuesday, August 23, 2011 10:03 AM
> Subject: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
>
>
>> Just an update...
>>
>>        Hi all.
>> I want to thank you all for the confidence boost.
>> My dad, son, and I went to meet the teacher yesterday.
>> I asked her if she could email me the handouts and I was very pleased to
>> find out that she would be happy to do it for me.
>> But my dad still requested the paper handouts for himself.
>> IDK why, but it was rather upsetting that he feels he has to be involved.
>>
>> Anyway, success!
>> Oh and I?m going to pick my son up from school, give my dad a break, lol.
>>
>> It?s confusing to me that my parents complain, mainly my dad, about having
>> to do everything, but when I take a stand, it back fires.
>> Meaning, it?s hard for him to accept me being independent.
>>
>> Nikki
>> _______________________________________________
>> blparent mailing list
>> blparent at nfbnet.org
>> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
>> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
>> blparent:
>> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/dkent5817%40att.net
>>
>
>
> _______________________________________________
> blparent mailing list
> blparent at nfbnet.org
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
> blparent:
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/daizies304%40comcast.net
>
>
> _______________________________________________
> blparent mailing list
> blparent at nfbnet.org
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
> blparent:
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/madison_tewe%40spinn.net
>
>
> _______________________________________________
> blparent mailing list
> blparent at nfbnet.org
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
> blparent:
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/erinrumer%40gmail.com
>
>
> _______________________________________________
> blparent mailing list
> blparent at nfbnet.org
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
> blparent:
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/daizies304%40comcast.net
>
>
> _______________________________________________
> blparent mailing list
> blparent at nfbnet.org
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
> blparent:
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/chad%40chadallenmagic.com
>
>
> _______________________________________________
> blparent mailing list
> blparent at nfbnet.org
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
> blparent:
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/daizies304%40comcast.net
>
>
>
>
> ------------------------------
>
> Message: 20
> Date: Tue, 23 Aug 2011 22:43:37 -0500
> From: "Barbara Hammel" <poetlori8 at msn.com>
> To: "NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List" <blparent at nfbnet.org>
> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
> Message-ID: <SNT139-ds55EF58C7F6BC4A8938CE5EB110 at phx.gbl>
> Content-Type: text/plain; format=flowed; charset="utf-8";
> 	reply-type=response
>
> The same feelings one gets when one asks their sighted spouse how the floor
> looks after you ran the vacuum and the response is "It'll do."  What the
> heck does that mean?
> Needless to say, vacuuming doesn't get done near enough.
> Barbara
>
>
>
>
> Let every nation know whether it wishes us well or ill, that we shall pay
> any price, bear any burden, meet any hardship, support any friend, oppose
> any foe, in order to assure the survival and the success of liberty.--John
> F. Kennedy
> -----Original Message-----
> From: Nikki
> Sent: Tuesday, August 23, 2011 4:59 PM
> To: NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List
> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
>
>             Hi Debbie.
> I feel as though I shouldn't have to prove my capabilities to my parents.
> It is MY son, isn't it?
> I shouldn't feel like I'm being controlled just because I live in their
> house, you know?
>
> Rebecca.
> I have a laptop and my parents respect my privacy, so no worries there.
> If anything were to come up, you can be certain I'll make sure they hear
> about it.
> I am the youngest of 2. My older brother lives with his family.
> As far as friends, I have a couple, but not going to talk to them about my
> feelings.
>
> V, my son constantly reminds me and my parents that I'm the boss.
> So, if he wants something and asks my mom, she tells him, "go ask your mom."
> I'm the one in charge.
>
> As far as my dad doing everything, I'm ashamed and embarrassed.
> I get frustrated when we're both in the kitchen, I get the milk and a glass.
> In the midst of what he's doing, stops and takes these items from me and
> pours the glass for me.
> Now, I'm able to do this myself and today, I told him, "what are you doing?
> I can do this myself."
> IDK what exactly he said, but I think he said,"I know." I asked him, "then
> why aren't you letting me do it myself?
> His response told me he has little or no confidence in me. He said, "I  just
> washed the counter. I don't want to clean it again."
> Do you know what that does to someone's self esteem?
>
> So, it's not so much me letting him do everything. His stress he has, is
> brought on by himself.
> I may need to fix some things with myself, but God and I are working on it.
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: Deborah Kent Stein
> Sent: Tuesday, August 23, 2011 12:12 PM
> To: NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List
> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
>
>
>
> Dear Nikki,
>
> Great news!  The more you take control, the more your folks are likely to
> see how capable you are.
>
> Debbie
>
> ----- Original Message -----
> From: "Nikki" <daizies304 at comcast.net>
> To: <blparent at nfbnet.org>
> Sent: Tuesday, August 23, 2011 10:03 AM
> Subject: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
>
>
>> Just an update...
>>
>>        Hi all.
>> I want to thank you all for the confidence boost.
>> My dad, son, and I went to meet the teacher yesterday.
>> I asked her if she could email me the handouts and I was very pleased to
>> find out that she would be happy to do it for me.
>> But my dad still requested the paper handouts for himself.
>> IDK why, but it was rather upsetting that he feels he has to be involved.
>>
>> Anyway, success!
>> Oh and I?m going to pick my son up from school, give my dad a break, lol.
>>
>> It?s confusing to me that my parents complain, mainly my dad, about having
>> to do everything, but when I take a stand, it back fires.
>> Meaning, it?s hard for him to accept me being independent.
>>
>> Nikki
>> _______________________________________________
>> blparent mailing list
>> blparent at nfbnet.org
>> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
>> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
>> blparent:
>> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/dkent5817%40att.net
>>
>
>
> _______________________________________________
> blparent mailing list
> blparent at nfbnet.org
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
> blparent:
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/daizies304%40comcast.net
>
>
> _______________________________________________
> blparent mailing list
> blparent at nfbnet.org
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
> blparent:
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/poetlori8%40msn.com
>
>
>
>
> ------------------------------
>
> Message: 21
> Date: Tue, 23 Aug 2011 22:49:45 -0500
> From: "Barbara Hammel" <poetlori8 at msn.com>
> To: "NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List" <blparent at nfbnet.org>
> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
> Message-ID: <SNT139-ds55997BEBC0FC8F1A186EFEB110 at phx.gbl>
> Content-Type: text/plain; format=flowed; charset="utf-8";
> 	reply-type=response
>
> Do you live somewher close to one that you could attend?  I have a husband a
> bit like that so I let him do all the cooking.  (I don't like it any way.)
> But, at least at the center here, we had to cook a 7-course meal as our
> final project.  Oh, and serve it to a small group of people, like family.
>
>
>
> Let every nation know whether it wishes us well or ill, that we shall pay
> any price, bear any burden, meet any hardship, support any friend, oppose
> any foe, in order to assure the survival and the success of liberty.--John
> F. Kennedy
> -----Original Message-----
> From: Nikki
> Sent: Tuesday, August 23, 2011 9:03 PM
> To: NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List
> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
>
>     No Amanda, I have not.
> Let me tell you why.
> I was diagnosed with RP at age 3.
> It is a progressive blindness.
> I was given chores to do around the house, as I grew up.
> So, I learned things by watching my mom or dad.
>
> As I got older though, my vision began deteriorating.
> So my dad modified the washer and dryer because I wanted to do my own
> laundry, plus my dad shrunk some of my shirts, lol.
> I would vaccume, dust, have KP occasionally.
> I was only able to make simple things to eat, like, grilled cheese, mac and
> cheese, soup, microwavable things.
> I used to make cookies with ease.
> Now, I have trouble cutting bread, spreading PB, jelly, or mayo on bread,
> when it used to be not a problem.
> I have trouble with putting in and taking out cookie trays from the oven,
> now, so I don't bake as much as I used to.
>
> Now, I can just hear my dad saying, "why do you feel like you have to do
> that when you have me here to help you."
>
> Um, I couldn't say anything because my dad is quick, sometimes I feel...
> um... can't think of the word, it's like I have be as quick or quicker even
> to meet my son's wants and because I can't, it leaves me feeling not
> worthless, but... that word...
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: Amanda Winkler
> Sent: Tuesday, August 23, 2011 5:23 PM
> To: NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List
> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
>
> Nikki,
> In response to your dad pouring the glass of milk for you.  you might have
> said"Well I guess I'll have to clean up any mess I make and keep cleaning
> until I get it clean to your standards."  I am wondering have you ever taken
> Independent Living Skills at a learning center for the blind before?
>
> Amanda
>
> --------------------------------------------------
> From: "Nikki" <daizies304 at comcast.net>
> Sent: Tuesday, August 23, 2011 2:59 PM
> To: "NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List" <blparent at nfbnet.org>
> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
>
>>            Hi Debbie.
>> I feel as though I shouldn't have to prove my capabilities to my parents.
>> It is MY son, isn't it?
>> I shouldn't feel like I'm being controlled just because I live in their
>> house, you know?
>>
>> Rebecca.
>> I have a laptop and my parents respect my privacy, so no worries there.
>> If anything were to come up, you can be certain I'll make sure they hear
>> about it.
>> I am the youngest of 2. My older brother lives with his family.
>> As far as friends, I have a couple, but not going to talk to them about my
>> feelings.
>>
>> V, my son constantly reminds me and my parents that I'm the boss.
>> So, if he wants something and asks my mom, she tells him, "go ask your
>> mom."
>> I'm the one in charge.
>>
>> As far as my dad doing everything, I'm ashamed and embarrassed.
>> I get frustrated when we're both in the kitchen, I get the milk and a
>> glass.
>> In the midst of what he's doing, stops and takes these items from me and
>> pours the glass for me.
>> Now, I'm able to do this myself and today, I told him, "what are you
>> doing?
>> I can do this myself."
>> IDK what exactly he said, but I think he said,"I know." I asked him, "then
>>
>> why aren't you letting me do it myself?
>> His response told me he has little or no confidence in me. He said, "I
>> just washed the counter. I don't want to clean it again."
>> Do you know what that does to someone's self esteem?
>>
>> So, it's not so much me letting him do everything. His stress he has, is
>> brought on by himself.
>> I may need to fix some things with myself, but God and I are working on
>> it.
>>
>>
>>
>>
>>
>>
>>
>>
>>
>>
>> -----Original Message-----
>> From: Deborah Kent Stein
>> Sent: Tuesday, August 23, 2011 12:12 PM
>> To: NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List
>> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
>>
>>
>>
>> Dear Nikki,
>>
>> Great news!  The more you take control, the more your folks are likely to
>> see how capable you are.
>>
>> Debbie
>>
>> ----- Original Message -----
>> From: "Nikki" <daizies304 at comcast.net>
>> To: <blparent at nfbnet.org>
>> Sent: Tuesday, August 23, 2011 10:03 AM
>> Subject: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
>>
>>
>>> Just an update...
>>>
>>>        Hi all.
>>> I want to thank you all for the confidence boost.
>>> My dad, son, and I went to meet the teacher yesterday.
>>> I asked her if she could email me the handouts and I was very pleased to
>>> find out that she would be happy to do it for me.
>>> But my dad still requested the paper handouts for himself.
>>> IDK why, but it was rather upsetting that he feels he has to be involved.
>>>
>>> Anyway, success!
>>> Oh and I?m going to pick my son up from school, give my dad a break, lol.
>>>
>>> It?s confusing to me that my parents complain, mainly my dad, about
>>> having
>>> to do everything, but when I take a stand, it back fires.
>>> Meaning, it?s hard for him to accept me being independent.
>>>
>>> Nikki
>>> _______________________________________________
>>> blparent mailing list
>>> blparent at nfbnet.org
>>> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
>>> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
>>> blparent:
>>> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/dkent5817%40att.net
>>>
>>
>>
>> _______________________________________________
>> blparent mailing list
>> blparent at nfbnet.org
>> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
>> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
>> blparent:
>> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/daizies304%40comcast.net
>>
>> _______________________________________________
>> blparent mailing list
>> blparent at nfbnet.org
>> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
>> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
>> blparent:
>> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/awcactuscat1%40hotmail.com
>>
>
> _______________________________________________
> blparent mailing list
> blparent at nfbnet.org
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
> blparent:
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/daizies304%40comcast.net
>
>
> _______________________________________________
> blparent mailing list
> blparent at nfbnet.org
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
> blparent:
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/poetlori8%40msn.com
>
>
>
>
> ------------------------------
>
> Message: 22
> Date: Tue, 23 Aug 2011 22:50:40 -0500
> From: "Nikki" <daizies304 at comcast.net>
> To: "NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List" <blparent at nfbnet.org>
> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
> Message-ID: <0EA8E2BA021041449519C6D948E91EBD at NicolePC>
> Content-Type: text/plain; format=flowed; charset="utf-8";
> 	reply-type=response
>
>     It means, it's good enough for them.
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: Barbara Hammel
> Sent: Tuesday, August 23, 2011 10:43 PM
> To: NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List
> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
>
> The same feelings one gets when one asks their sighted spouse how the floor
> looks after you ran the vacuum and the response is "It'll do."  What the
> heck does that mean?
> Needless to say, vacuuming doesn't get done near enough.
> Barbara
>
>
>
>
> Let every nation know whether it wishes us well or ill, that we shall pay
> any price, bear any burden, meet any hardship, support any friend, oppose
> any foe, in order to assure the survival and the success of liberty.--John
> F. Kennedy
> -----Original Message-----
> From: Nikki
> Sent: Tuesday, August 23, 2011 4:59 PM
> To: NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List
> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
>
>             Hi Debbie.
> I feel as though I shouldn't have to prove my capabilities to my parents.
> It is MY son, isn't it?
> I shouldn't feel like I'm being controlled just because I live in their
> house, you know?
>
> Rebecca.
> I have a laptop and my parents respect my privacy, so no worries there.
> If anything were to come up, you can be certain I'll make sure they hear
> about it.
> I am the youngest of 2. My older brother lives with his family.
> As far as friends, I have a couple, but not going to talk to them about my
> feelings.
>
> V, my son constantly reminds me and my parents that I'm the boss.
> So, if he wants something and asks my mom, she tells him, "go ask your mom."
> I'm the one in charge.
>
> As far as my dad doing everything, I'm ashamed and embarrassed.
> I get frustrated when we're both in the kitchen, I get the milk and a glass.
> In the midst of what he's doing, stops and takes these items from me and
> pours the glass for me.
> Now, I'm able to do this myself and today, I told him, "what are you doing?
> I can do this myself."
> IDK what exactly he said, but I think he said,"I know." I asked him, "then
> why aren't you letting me do it myself?
> His response told me he has little or no confidence in me. He said, "I  just
> washed the counter. I don't want to clean it again."
> Do you know what that does to someone's self esteem?
>
> So, it's not so much me letting him do everything. His stress he has, is
> brought on by himself.
> I may need to fix some things with myself, but God and I are working on it.
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: Deborah Kent Stein
> Sent: Tuesday, August 23, 2011 12:12 PM
> To: NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List
> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
>
>
>
> Dear Nikki,
>
> Great news!  The more you take control, the more your folks are likely to
> see how capable you are.
>
> Debbie
>
> ----- Original Message -----
> From: "Nikki" <daizies304 at comcast.net>
> To: <blparent at nfbnet.org>
> Sent: Tuesday, August 23, 2011 10:03 AM
> Subject: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
>
>
>> Just an update...
>>
>>        Hi all.
>> I want to thank you all for the confidence boost.
>> My dad, son, and I went to meet the teacher yesterday.
>> I asked her if she could email me the handouts and I was very pleased to
>> find out that she would be happy to do it for me.
>> But my dad still requested the paper handouts for himself.
>> IDK why, but it was rather upsetting that he feels he has to be involved.
>>
>> Anyway, success!
>> Oh and I?m going to pick my son up from school, give my dad a break, lol.
>>
>> It?s confusing to me that my parents complain, mainly my dad, about having
>> to do everything, but when I take a stand, it back fires.
>> Meaning, it?s hard for him to accept me being independent.
>>
>> Nikki
>> _______________________________________________
>> blparent mailing list
>> blparent at nfbnet.org
>> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
>> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
>> blparent:
>> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/dkent5817%40att.net
>>
>
>
> _______________________________________________
> blparent mailing list
> blparent at nfbnet.org
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
> blparent:
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/daizies304%40comcast.net
>
>
> _______________________________________________
> blparent mailing list
> blparent at nfbnet.org
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
> blparent:
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/poetlori8%40msn.com
>
>
> _______________________________________________
> blparent mailing list
> blparent at nfbnet.org
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
> blparent:
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/daizies304%40comcast.net
>
>
>
>
> ------------------------------
>
> Message: 23
> Date: Tue, 23 Aug 2011 23:37:17 -0500
> From: "Nikki" <daizies304 at comcast.net>
> To: "NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List" <blparent at nfbnet.org>
> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
> Message-ID: <69922FCBBD4545798C7E3C7EA1909BC1 at NicolePC>
> Content-Type: text/plain; format=flowed; charset="utf-8";
> 	reply-type=response
>
>     Wow!
> Um, no.
> The state of IL doesn't have one.
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: Barbara Hammel
> Sent: Tuesday, August 23, 2011 10:49 PM
> To: NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List
> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
>
> Do you live somewher close to one that you could attend?  I have a husband a
> bit like that so I let him do all the cooking.  (I don't like it any way.)
> But, at least at the center here, we had to cook a 7-course meal as our
> final project.  Oh, and serve it to a small group of people, like family.
>
>
>
> Let every nation know whether it wishes us well or ill, that we shall pay
> any price, bear any burden, meet any hardship, support any friend, oppose
> any foe, in order to assure the survival and the success of liberty.--John
> F. Kennedy
> -----Original Message-----
> From: Nikki
> Sent: Tuesday, August 23, 2011 9:03 PM
> To: NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List
> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
>
>     No Amanda, I have not.
> Let me tell you why.
> I was diagnosed with RP at age 3.
> It is a progressive blindness.
> I was given chores to do around the house, as I grew up.
> So, I learned things by watching my mom or dad.
>
> As I got older though, my vision began deteriorating.
> So my dad modified the washer and dryer because I wanted to do my own
> laundry, plus my dad shrunk some of my shirts, lol.
> I would vaccume, dust, have KP occasionally.
> I was only able to make simple things to eat, like, grilled cheese, mac and
> cheese, soup, microwavable things.
> I used to make cookies with ease.
> Now, I have trouble cutting bread, spreading PB, jelly, or mayo on bread,
> when it used to be not a problem.
> I have trouble with putting in and taking out cookie trays from the oven,
> now, so I don't bake as much as I used to.
>
> Now, I can just hear my dad saying, "why do you feel like you have to do
> that when you have me here to help you."
>
> Um, I couldn't say anything because my dad is quick, sometimes I feel...
> um... can't think of the word, it's like I have be as quick or quicker even
> to meet my son's wants and because I can't, it leaves me feeling not
> worthless, but... that word...
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: Amanda Winkler
> Sent: Tuesday, August 23, 2011 5:23 PM
> To: NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List
> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
>
> Nikki,
> In response to your dad pouring the glass of milk for you.  you might have
> said"Well I guess I'll have to clean up any mess I make and keep cleaning
> until I get it clean to your standards."  I am wondering have you ever taken
> Independent Living Skills at a learning center for the blind before?
>
> Amanda
>
> --------------------------------------------------
> From: "Nikki" <daizies304 at comcast.net>
> Sent: Tuesday, August 23, 2011 2:59 PM
> To: "NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List" <blparent at nfbnet.org>
> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
>
>>            Hi Debbie.
>> I feel as though I shouldn't have to prove my capabilities to my parents.
>> It is MY son, isn't it?
>> I shouldn't feel like I'm being controlled just because I live in their
>> house, you know?
>>
>> Rebecca.
>> I have a laptop and my parents respect my privacy, so no worries there.
>> If anything were to come up, you can be certain I'll make sure they hear
>> about it.
>> I am the youngest of 2. My older brother lives with his family.
>> As far as friends, I have a couple, but not going to talk to them about my
>> feelings.
>>
>> V, my son constantly reminds me and my parents that I'm the boss.
>> So, if he wants something and asks my mom, she tells him, "go ask your
>> mom."
>> I'm the one in charge.
>>
>> As far as my dad doing everything, I'm ashamed and embarrassed.
>> I get frustrated when we're both in the kitchen, I get the milk and a
>> glass.
>> In the midst of what he's doing, stops and takes these items from me and
>> pours the glass for me.
>> Now, I'm able to do this myself and today, I told him, "what are you
>> doing?
>> I can do this myself."
>> IDK what exactly he said, but I think he said,"I know." I asked him, "then
>>
>> why aren't you letting me do it myself?
>> His response told me he has little or no confidence in me. He said, "I
>> just washed the counter. I don't want to clean it again."
>> Do you know what that does to someone's self esteem?
>>
>> So, it's not so much me letting him do everything. His stress he has, is
>> brought on by himself.
>> I may need to fix some things with myself, but God and I are working on
>> it.
>>
>>
>>
>>
>>
>>
>>
>>
>>
>>
>> -----Original Message-----
>> From: Deborah Kent Stein
>> Sent: Tuesday, August 23, 2011 12:12 PM
>> To: NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List
>> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
>>
>>
>>
>> Dear Nikki,
>>
>> Great news!  The more you take control, the more your folks are likely to
>> see how capable you are.
>>
>> Debbie
>>
>> ----- Original Message -----
>> From: "Nikki" <daizies304 at comcast.net>
>> To: <blparent at nfbnet.org>
>> Sent: Tuesday, August 23, 2011 10:03 AM
>> Subject: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
>>
>>
>>> Just an update...
>>>
>>>        Hi all.
>>> I want to thank you all for the confidence boost.
>>> My dad, son, and I went to meet the teacher yesterday.
>>> I asked her if she could email me the handouts and I was very pleased to
>>> find out that she would be happy to do it for me.
>>> But my dad still requested the paper handouts for himself.
>>> IDK why, but it was rather upsetting that he feels he has to be involved.
>>>
>>> Anyway, success!
>>> Oh and I?m going to pick my son up from school, give my dad a break, lol.
>>>
>>> It?s confusing to me that my parents complain, mainly my dad, about
>>> having
>>> to do everything, but when I take a stand, it back fires.
>>> Meaning, it?s hard for him to accept me being independent.
>>>
>>> Nikki
>>> _______________________________________________
>>> blparent mailing list
>>> blparent at nfbnet.org
>>> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
>>> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
>>> blparent:
>>> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/dkent5817%40att.net
>>>
>>
>>
>> _______________________________________________
>> blparent mailing list
>> blparent at nfbnet.org
>> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
>> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
>> blparent:
>> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/daizies304%40comcast.net
>>
>> _______________________________________________
>> blparent mailing list
>> blparent at nfbnet.org
>> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
>> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
>> blparent:
>> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/awcactuscat1%40hotmail.com
>>
>
> _______________________________________________
> blparent mailing list
> blparent at nfbnet.org
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
> blparent:
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/daizies304%40comcast.net
>
>
> _______________________________________________
> blparent mailing list
> blparent at nfbnet.org
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
> blparent:
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/poetlori8%40msn.com
>
>
> _______________________________________________
> blparent mailing list
> blparent at nfbnet.org
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
> blparent:
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/daizies304%40comcast.net
>
>
>
>
> ------------------------------
>
> Message: 24
> Date: Wed, 24 Aug 2011 12:49:28 +0000
> From: "Pickrell, Rebecca M (TASC)" <REBECCA.PICKRELL at tasc.com>
> To: 'NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List' <blparent at nfbnet.org>
> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
> Message-ID: <AAE38548E198F64B8E345439B68CCC7832E7EAE1 at TSEAMB02>
> Content-Type: text/plain; charset="utf-8"
>
> Dads are like that.
> And while you live in his house, he does have control.
> If you lived alone, you'd have to buy things like food and toilet paper.
> Your dad buys that stuff now and it's not as if he's going to make a
> hamburger for himself and not one for his child and grandchild. Ditto for
> toilet paper, he's not going to say "This is mine, you're on youro wn".
>
> Living with people has all kinds of complexities.
>
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org [mailto:blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org] On
> Behalf Of Nikki
> Sent: Tuesday, August 23, 2011 10:21 PM
> To: NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List
> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
>
>     Yes!
> I appreciate all the boosts of confidence, thank you.
> I will definitely be taking control, putting my foot down.
> And Yes, my mom steps in and does things for me, but she's different about
> it each time.
>
> Some days she'll ask and other days she won't realize what she did until
> after it's done, then she apologizes.
> But since I don't see her much, she can't really do anything for me.
> Besides, she wants me to be independent.
> It's my dad that has a hard time letting go.
>
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: Erin Rumer
> Sent: Tuesday, August 23, 2011 5:31 PM
> To: 'NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List'
> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
>
> Yes Nikky, tell your dad, "Haven't you heard the saying don't cry over spilt
> milk?" SMILING!
>
> Erin
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org [mailto:blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org] On
> Behalf Of Veronica Smith
> Sent: Tuesday, August 23, 2011 3:28 PM
> To: 'NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List'
> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
>
> Nikki, I have faith in you and if I were you, I would say, "even sighted
> peeps make messes."  Next time, say no thank you to the glass and reach over
> and take control.  If you always let him, he will always be the same.
> Remember though, I am not perfect nor do I claim to be.  I know how parents
> are, my mom and dad tried to do it all for me, but I finally started just
> doing it and they finally saw that  I could.
> How abut your mom, does she try to do it all for you as well?  Like I said,
> Nikki, you can take control.  Tell dad thanks, but no thanks and if you do
> spill the milk, you and only you should be the one to clean up after
> yourself. V
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org [mailto:blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org] On
> Behalf Of Nikki
> Sent: Tuesday, August 23, 2011 4:00 PM
> To: NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List
> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
>
>             Hi Debbie.
> I feel as though I shouldn't have to prove my capabilities to my parents.
> It is MY son, isn't it?
> I shouldn't feel like I'm being controlled just because I live in their
> house, you know?
>
> Rebecca.
> I have a laptop and my parents respect my privacy, so no worries there.
> If anything were to come up, you can be certain I'll make sure they hear
> about it.
> I am the youngest of 2. My older brother lives with his family.
> As far as friends, I have a couple, but not going to talk to them about my
> feelings.
>
> V, my son constantly reminds me and my parents that I'm the boss.
> So, if he wants something and asks my mom, she tells him, "go ask your mom."
> I'm the one in charge.
>
> As far as my dad doing everything, I'm ashamed and embarrassed.
> I get frustrated when we're both in the kitchen, I get the milk and a glass.
> In the midst of what he's doing, stops and takes these items from me and
> pours the glass for me.
> Now, I'm able to do this myself and today, I told him, "what are you doing?
> I can do this myself."
> IDK what exactly he said, but I think he said,"I know." I asked him, "then
> why aren't you letting me do it myself?
> His response told me he has little or no confidence in me. He said, "I  just
> washed the counter. I don't want to clean it again."
> Do you know what that does to someone's self esteem?
>
> So, it's not so much me letting him do everything. His stress he has, is
> brought on by himself.
> I may need to fix some things with myself, but God and I are working on it.
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: Deborah Kent Stein
> Sent: Tuesday, August 23, 2011 12:12 PM
> To: NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List
> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
>
>
>
> Dear Nikki,
>
> Great news!  The more you take control, the more your folks are likely to
> see how capable you are.
>
> Debbie
>
> ----- Original Message -----
> From: "Nikki" <daizies304 at comcast.net>
> To: <blparent at nfbnet.org>
> Sent: Tuesday, August 23, 2011 10:03 AM
> Subject: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
>
>
>> Just an update...
>>
>>        Hi all.
>> I want to thank you all for the confidence boost.
>> My dad, son, and I went to meet the teacher yesterday.
>> I asked her if she could email me the handouts and I was very pleased to
>> find out that she would be happy to do it for me.
>> But my dad still requested the paper handouts for himself.
>> IDK why, but it was rather upsetting that he feels he has to be involved.
>>
>> Anyway, success!
>> Oh and I?m going to pick my son up from school, give my dad a break, lol.
>>
>> It?s confusing to me that my parents complain, mainly my dad, about having
>> to do everything, but when I take a stand, it back fires.
>> Meaning, it?s hard for him to accept me being independent.
>>
>> Nikki
>> _______________________________________________
>> blparent mailing list
>> blparent at nfbnet.org
>> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
>> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
>> blparent:
>> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/dkent5817%40att.net
>>
>
>
> _______________________________________________
> blparent mailing list
> blparent at nfbnet.org
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
> blparent:
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/daizies304%40comcast.net
>
>
> _______________________________________________
> blparent mailing list
> blparent at nfbnet.org
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>
> ------------------------------
>
> Message: 25
> Date: Wed, 24 Aug 2011 08:44:17 -0500
> From: "Nikki" <daizies304 at comcast.net>
> To: "NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List" <blparent at nfbnet.org>
> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
> Message-ID: <E246F448B5E94912A5EB2EB474013CFD at NicolePC>
> Content-Type: text/plain; format=flowed; charset="utf-8";
> 	reply-type=original
>
>     Well, I help pay for groceries.
> My parents, especially my mom, say, "what's mine is yours."
> They aren't selfish.
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: Pickrell, Rebecca M (TASC)
> Sent: Wednesday, August 24, 2011 7:49 AM
> To: 'NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List'
> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
>
> Dads are like that.
> And while you live in his house, he does have control.
> If you lived alone, you'd have to buy things like food and toilet paper.
> Your dad buys that stuff now and it's not as if he's going to make a
> hamburger for himself and not one for his child and grandchild. Ditto for
> toilet paper, he's not going to say "This is mine, you're on youro wn".
>
> Living with people has all kinds of complexities.
>
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org [mailto:blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org] On
> Behalf Of Nikki
> Sent: Tuesday, August 23, 2011 10:21 PM
> To: NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List
> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
>
>     Yes!
> I appreciate all the boosts of confidence, thank you.
> I will definitely be taking control, putting my foot down.
> And Yes, my mom steps in and does things for me, but she's different about
> it each time.
>
> Some days she'll ask and other days she won't realize what she did until
> after it's done, then she apologizes.
> But since I don't see her much, she can't really do anything for me.
> Besides, she wants me to be independent.
> It's my dad that has a hard time letting go.
>
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: Erin Rumer
> Sent: Tuesday, August 23, 2011 5:31 PM
> To: 'NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List'
> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
>
> Yes Nikky, tell your dad, "Haven't you heard the saying don't cry over spilt
> milk?" SMILING!
>
> Erin
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org [mailto:blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org] On
> Behalf Of Veronica Smith
> Sent: Tuesday, August 23, 2011 3:28 PM
> To: 'NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List'
> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
>
> Nikki, I have faith in you and if I were you, I would say, "even sighted
> peeps make messes."  Next time, say no thank you to the glass and reach over
> and take control.  If you always let him, he will always be the same.
> Remember though, I am not perfect nor do I claim to be.  I know how parents
> are, my mom and dad tried to do it all for me, but I finally started just
> doing it and they finally saw that  I could.
> How abut your mom, does she try to do it all for you as well?  Like I said,
> Nikki, you can take control.  Tell dad thanks, but no thanks and if you do
> spill the milk, you and only you should be the one to clean up after
> yourself. V
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org [mailto:blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org] On
> Behalf Of Nikki
> Sent: Tuesday, August 23, 2011 4:00 PM
> To: NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List
> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
>
>             Hi Debbie.
> I feel as though I shouldn't have to prove my capabilities to my parents.
> It is MY son, isn't it?
> I shouldn't feel like I'm being controlled just because I live in their
> house, you know?
>
> Rebecca.
> I have a laptop and my parents respect my privacy, so no worries there.
> If anything were to come up, you can be certain I'll make sure they hear
> about it.
> I am the youngest of 2. My older brother lives with his family.
> As far as friends, I have a couple, but not going to talk to them about my
> feelings.
>
> V, my son constantly reminds me and my parents that I'm the boss.
> So, if he wants something and asks my mom, she tells him, "go ask your mom."
> I'm the one in charge.
>
> As far as my dad doing everything, I'm ashamed and embarrassed.
> I get frustrated when we're both in the kitchen, I get the milk and a glass.
> In the midst of what he's doing, stops and takes these items from me and
> pours the glass for me.
> Now, I'm able to do this myself and today, I told him, "what are you doing?
> I can do this myself."
> IDK what exactly he said, but I think he said,"I know." I asked him, "then
> why aren't you letting me do it myself?
> His response told me he has little or no confidence in me. He said, "I  just
> washed the counter. I don't want to clean it again."
> Do you know what that does to someone's self esteem?
>
> So, it's not so much me letting him do everything. His stress he has, is
> brought on by himself.
> I may need to fix some things with myself, but God and I are working on it.
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: Deborah Kent Stein
> Sent: Tuesday, August 23, 2011 12:12 PM
> To: NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List
> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
>
>
>
> Dear Nikki,
>
> Great news!  The more you take control, the more your folks are likely to
> see how capable you are.
>
> Debbie
>
> ----- Original Message -----
> From: "Nikki" <daizies304 at comcast.net>
> To: <blparent at nfbnet.org>
> Sent: Tuesday, August 23, 2011 10:03 AM
> Subject: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
>
>
>> Just an update...
>>
>>        Hi all.
>> I want to thank you all for the confidence boost.
>> My dad, son, and I went to meet the teacher yesterday.
>> I asked her if she could email me the handouts and I was very pleased to
>> find out that she would be happy to do it for me.
>> But my dad still requested the paper handouts for himself.
>> IDK why, but it was rather upsetting that he feels he has to be involved.
>>
>> Anyway, success!
>> Oh and I?m going to pick my son up from school, give my dad a break, lol.
>>
>> It?s confusing to me that my parents complain, mainly my dad, about having
>> to do everything, but when I take a stand, it back fires.
>> Meaning, it?s hard for him to accept me being independent.
>>
>> Nikki
>> _______________________________________________
>> blparent mailing list
>> blparent at nfbnet.org
>> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
>> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
>> blparent:
>> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/dkent5817%40att.net
>>
>
>
> _______________________________________________
> blparent mailing list
> blparent at nfbnet.org
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
> blparent:
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>
>
> _______________________________________________
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> blparent at nfbnet.org
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> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
> blparent:
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>
> _______________________________________________
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> blparent at nfbnet.org
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
> blparent:
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>
>
> _______________________________________________
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> blparent at nfbnet.org
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
> blparent:
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>
> _______________________________________________
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> blparent at nfbnet.org
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
> blparent:
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/rebecca.pickrell%40tasc.com
> _______________________________________________
> blparent mailing list
> blparent at nfbnet.org
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
> blparent:
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/daizies304%40comcast.net
>
>
>
>
> ------------------------------
>
> Message: 26
> Date: Wed, 24 Aug 2011 07:55:26 -0600
> From: Sheila Leigland <sleigland at bresnan.net>
> To: NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List <blparent at nfbnet.org>
> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
> Message-ID: <auto-000060882305 at fe-3.cluster1.bresnan.net>
> Content-Type: text/plain; charset="utf-8"
>
> Hi nikki it is difficult to control corcumstances when you live at home with
> parents. I know in my situation a long time ago now i felt like I really
> didn't have the right to speak up. It was their house not mine in the same
> way. There was so much that I didn't know about blindness skills. Parents
> don't intend to be mean or controling. They believe they are being helpful.
> I wanted to grow up and felt that I had the right to do so but didn't know
> how to proceed. My vr counselor at the time talked to me about getting an
> apartment and I was so hesetant to talk to my parents about it that an
> apartment was found before I discussed it and my parents found out. They
> were verry upset and hurt. It wasn't my intention to hurt them but that
> happened at least in part because I didn't have enough confidence in myself
> to take the necessary stands. Then I found out that they didn't feel I was
> capable of independence and I became hurt and angry. There was plenty of
> blame to go around. I'm totally blind and I couldn't watch my parents do
> things and learn that way. I needed hands on instruction. I got my apartment
> and worked for around six weeks with a rehab teacher and it helped alot.
> Your dad will come around when he sees that you can do the things that you
> need to do.
>
>
>
> ------------------------------
>
> Message: 27
> Date: Wed, 24 Aug 2011 14:07:00 +0000
> From: "Pickrell, Rebecca M (TASC)" <REBECCA.PICKRELL at tasc.com>
> To: 'NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List' <blparent at nfbnet.org>
> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
> Message-ID: <AAE38548E198F64B8E345439B68CCC7832E7ECD3 at TSEAMB02>
> Content-Type: text/plain; charset="utf-8"
>
> Right but you do live with them so they do have some control. You can't have
> it both ways. And even if you didn't pay for groceries, it's not as if
> they'd let you starve.
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org [mailto:blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org] On
> Behalf Of Nikki
> Sent: Wednesday, August 24, 2011 9:44 AM
> To: NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List
> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
>
>     Well, I help pay for groceries.
> My parents, especially my mom, say, "what's mine is yours."
> They aren't selfish.
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: Pickrell, Rebecca M (TASC)
> Sent: Wednesday, August 24, 2011 7:49 AM
> To: 'NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List'
> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
>
> Dads are like that.
> And while you live in his house, he does have control.
> If you lived alone, you'd have to buy things like food and toilet paper.
> Your dad buys that stuff now and it's not as if he's going to make a
> hamburger for himself and not one for his child and grandchild. Ditto for
> toilet paper, he's not going to say "This is mine, you're on youro wn".
>
> Living with people has all kinds of complexities.
>
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org [mailto:blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org] On
> Behalf Of Nikki
> Sent: Tuesday, August 23, 2011 10:21 PM
> To: NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List
> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
>
>     Yes!
> I appreciate all the boosts of confidence, thank you.
> I will definitely be taking control, putting my foot down.
> And Yes, my mom steps in and does things for me, but she's different about
> it each time.
>
> Some days she'll ask and other days she won't realize what she did until
> after it's done, then she apologizes.
> But since I don't see her much, she can't really do anything for me.
> Besides, she wants me to be independent.
> It's my dad that has a hard time letting go.
>
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: Erin Rumer
> Sent: Tuesday, August 23, 2011 5:31 PM
> To: 'NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List'
> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
>
> Yes Nikky, tell your dad, "Haven't you heard the saying don't cry over spilt
> milk?" SMILING!
>
> Erin
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org [mailto:blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org] On
> Behalf Of Veronica Smith
> Sent: Tuesday, August 23, 2011 3:28 PM
> To: 'NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List'
> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
>
> Nikki, I have faith in you and if I were you, I would say, "even sighted
> peeps make messes."  Next time, say no thank you to the glass and reach over
> and take control.  If you always let him, he will always be the same.
> Remember though, I am not perfect nor do I claim to be.  I know how parents
> are, my mom and dad tried to do it all for me, but I finally started just
> doing it and they finally saw that  I could.
> How abut your mom, does she try to do it all for you as well?  Like I said,
> Nikki, you can take control.  Tell dad thanks, but no thanks and if you do
> spill the milk, you and only you should be the one to clean up after
> yourself. V
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org [mailto:blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org] On
> Behalf Of Nikki
> Sent: Tuesday, August 23, 2011 4:00 PM
> To: NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List
> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
>
>             Hi Debbie.
> I feel as though I shouldn't have to prove my capabilities to my parents.
> It is MY son, isn't it?
> I shouldn't feel like I'm being controlled just because I live in their
> house, you know?
>
> Rebecca.
> I have a laptop and my parents respect my privacy, so no worries there.
> If anything were to come up, you can be certain I'll make sure they hear
> about it.
> I am the youngest of 2. My older brother lives with his family.
> As far as friends, I have a couple, but not going to talk to them about my
> feelings.
>
> V, my son constantly reminds me and my parents that I'm the boss.
> So, if he wants something and asks my mom, she tells him, "go ask your mom."
> I'm the one in charge.
>
> As far as my dad doing everything, I'm ashamed and embarrassed.
> I get frustrated when we're both in the kitchen, I get the milk and a glass.
> In the midst of what he's doing, stops and takes these items from me and
> pours the glass for me.
> Now, I'm able to do this myself and today, I told him, "what are you doing?
> I can do this myself."
> IDK what exactly he said, but I think he said,"I know." I asked him, "then
> why aren't you letting me do it myself?
> His response told me he has little or no confidence in me. He said, "I  just
> washed the counter. I don't want to clean it again."
> Do you know what that does to someone's self esteem?
>
> So, it's not so much me letting him do everything. His stress he has, is
> brought on by himself.
> I may need to fix some things with myself, but God and I are working on it.
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: Deborah Kent Stein
> Sent: Tuesday, August 23, 2011 12:12 PM
> To: NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List
> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
>
>
>
> Dear Nikki,
>
> Great news!  The more you take control, the more your folks are likely to
> see how capable you are.
>
> Debbie
>
> ----- Original Message -----
> From: "Nikki" <daizies304 at comcast.net>
> To: <blparent at nfbnet.org>
> Sent: Tuesday, August 23, 2011 10:03 AM
> Subject: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
>
>
>> Just an update...
>>
>>        Hi all.
>> I want to thank you all for the confidence boost.
>> My dad, son, and I went to meet the teacher yesterday.
>> I asked her if she could email me the handouts and I was very pleased to
>> find out that she would be happy to do it for me.
>> But my dad still requested the paper handouts for himself.
>> IDK why, but it was rather upsetting that he feels he has to be involved.
>>
>> Anyway, success!
>> Oh and I?m going to pick my son up from school, give my dad a break, lol.
>>
>> It?s confusing to me that my parents complain, mainly my dad, about having
>> to do everything, but when I take a stand, it back fires.
>> Meaning, it?s hard for him to accept me being independent.
>>
>> Nikki
>> _______________________________________________
>> blparent mailing list
>> blparent at nfbnet.org
>> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
>> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
>> blparent:
>> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/dkent5817%40att.net
>>
>
>
> _______________________________________________
> blparent mailing list
> blparent at nfbnet.org
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
> blparent:
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/daizies304%40comcast.net
>
>
> _______________________________________________
> blparent mailing list
> blparent at nfbnet.org
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
> blparent:
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/madison_tewe%40spinn.net
>
>
> _______________________________________________
> blparent mailing list
> blparent at nfbnet.org
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
> blparent:
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/erinrumer%40gmail.com
>
>
> _______________________________________________
> blparent mailing list
> blparent at nfbnet.org
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
> blparent:
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/daizies304%40comcast.net
>
>
> _______________________________________________
> blparent mailing list
> blparent at nfbnet.org
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
> blparent:
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/rebecca.pickrell%40tasc.com
> _______________________________________________
> blparent mailing list
> blparent at nfbnet.org
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
> blparent:
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/daizies304%40comcast.net
>
>
> _______________________________________________
> blparent mailing list
> blparent at nfbnet.org
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
> blparent:
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/rebecca.pickrell%40tasc.com
>
> ------------------------------
>
> Message: 28
> Date: Wed, 24 Aug 2011 09:21:19 -0500
> From: "Nikki" <daizies304 at comcast.net>
> To: "NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List" <blparent at nfbnet.org>
> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
> Message-ID: <C696469873DF48ECA0E7D422959A64B7 at NicolePC>
> Content-Type: text/plain; format=flowed; charset="iso-8859-1";
> 	reply-type=original
>
>     It's a question of him letting me.
> Sometimes I feel like I'm just there.
>
> Like this morning. Walking home from dropping the kid off at school.
> My son's friend's mom was walking with my dad and I. My dad talking about
> how he might need help on MWF's to get the boy from school because he has to
> pick up the cousin's from their school and then drive back here to pick up
> my son.
> They were talking about a way for her to be there for my son in case he's
> late or something.
> I had already said that I was going to pick him up.
>
> I just don't think he has enough confidence in me to walk up to the school
> and get my son.
> I guess it's going to take me doing the task to get him used to it.
> But my point is my dad was talking to her like I don't exist or it's his
> responsibility.
> Or like my son is his kid. Ugh!
> -----Original Message-----
> From: Sheila Leigland
> Sent: Wednesday, August 24, 2011 8:55 AM
> To: NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List
> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
>
> Hi nikki it is difficult to control corcumstances when you live at home with
> parents. I know in my situation a long time ago now i felt like I really
> didn't have the right to speak up. It was their house not mine in the same
> way. There was so much that I didn't know about blindness skills. Parents
> don't intend to be mean or controling. They believe they are being helpful.
> I wanted to grow up and felt that I had the right to do so but didn't know
> how to proceed. My vr counselor at the time talked to me about getting an
> apartment and I was so hesetant to talk to my parents about it that an
> apartment was found before I discussed it and my parents found out. They
> were verry upset and hurt. It wasn't my intention to hurt them but that
> happened at least in part because I didn't have enough confidence in myself
> to take the necessary stands. Then I found out that they didn't feel I was
> capable of independence and I became hurt and angry. There was plenty of
> blame to go around. I'm totally blind and I couldn't watch my parents do
> things and learn that way. I needed hands on instruction. I got my apartment
> and worked for around six weeks with a rehab teacher and it helped alot.
> Your dad will come around when he sees that you can do the things that you
> need to do.
>
> _______________________________________________
> blparent mailing list
> blparent at nfbnet.org
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
> blparent:
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/daizies304%40comcast.net
>
>
>
>
> ------------------------------
>
> Message: 29
> Date: Wed, 24 Aug 2011 09:24:45 -0500
> From: "Nikki" <daizies304 at comcast.net>
> To: "NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List" <blparent at nfbnet.org>
> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
> Message-ID: <F38B4DFC5380482989D0A6965FA80610 at NicolePC>
> Content-Type: text/plain; format=flowed; charset="utf-8";
> 	reply-type=original
>
>     bottom line is I need to get out of here!
> But still accept the help and support that is offered or given.
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: Pickrell, Rebecca M (TASC)
> Sent: Wednesday, August 24, 2011 9:07 AM
> To: 'NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List'
> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
>
> Right but you do live with them so they do have some control. You can't have
> it both ways. And even if you didn't pay for groceries, it's not as if
> they'd let you starve.
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org [mailto:blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org] On
> Behalf Of Nikki
> Sent: Wednesday, August 24, 2011 9:44 AM
> To: NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List
> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
>
>     Well, I help pay for groceries.
> My parents, especially my mom, say, "what's mine is yours."
> They aren't selfish.
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: Pickrell, Rebecca M (TASC)
> Sent: Wednesday, August 24, 2011 7:49 AM
> To: 'NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List'
> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
>
> Dads are like that.
> And while you live in his house, he does have control.
> If you lived alone, you'd have to buy things like food and toilet paper.
> Your dad buys that stuff now and it's not as if he's going to make a
> hamburger for himself and not one for his child and grandchild. Ditto for
> toilet paper, he's not going to say "This is mine, you're on youro wn".
>
> Living with people has all kinds of complexities.
>
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org [mailto:blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org] On
> Behalf Of Nikki
> Sent: Tuesday, August 23, 2011 10:21 PM
> To: NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List
> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
>
>     Yes!
> I appreciate all the boosts of confidence, thank you.
> I will definitely be taking control, putting my foot down.
> And Yes, my mom steps in and does things for me, but she's different about
> it each time.
>
> Some days she'll ask and other days she won't realize what she did until
> after it's done, then she apologizes.
> But since I don't see her much, she can't really do anything for me.
> Besides, she wants me to be independent.
> It's my dad that has a hard time letting go.
>
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: Erin Rumer
> Sent: Tuesday, August 23, 2011 5:31 PM
> To: 'NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List'
> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
>
> Yes Nikky, tell your dad, "Haven't you heard the saying don't cry over spilt
> milk?" SMILING!
>
> Erin
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org [mailto:blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org] On
> Behalf Of Veronica Smith
> Sent: Tuesday, August 23, 2011 3:28 PM
> To: 'NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List'
> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
>
> Nikki, I have faith in you and if I were you, I would say, "even sighted
> peeps make messes."  Next time, say no thank you to the glass and reach over
> and take control.  If you always let him, he will always be the same.
> Remember though, I am not perfect nor do I claim to be.  I know how parents
> are, my mom and dad tried to do it all for me, but I finally started just
> doing it and they finally saw that  I could.
> How abut your mom, does she try to do it all for you as well?  Like I said,
> Nikki, you can take control.  Tell dad thanks, but no thanks and if you do
> spill the milk, you and only you should be the one to clean up after
> yourself. V
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org [mailto:blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org] On
> Behalf Of Nikki
> Sent: Tuesday, August 23, 2011 4:00 PM
> To: NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List
> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
>
>             Hi Debbie.
> I feel as though I shouldn't have to prove my capabilities to my parents.
> It is MY son, isn't it?
> I shouldn't feel like I'm being controlled just because I live in their
> house, you know?
>
> Rebecca.
> I have a laptop and my parents respect my privacy, so no worries there.
> If anything were to come up, you can be certain I'll make sure they hear
> about it.
> I am the youngest of 2. My older brother lives with his family.
> As far as friends, I have a couple, but not going to talk to them about my
> feelings.
>
> V, my son constantly reminds me and my parents that I'm the boss.
> So, if he wants something and asks my mom, she tells him, "go ask your mom."
> I'm the one in charge.
>
> As far as my dad doing everything, I'm ashamed and embarrassed.
> I get frustrated when we're both in the kitchen, I get the milk and a glass.
> In the midst of what he's doing, stops and takes these items from me and
> pours the glass for me.
> Now, I'm able to do this myself and today, I told him, "what are you doing?
> I can do this myself."
> IDK what exactly he said, but I think he said,"I know." I asked him, "then
> why aren't you letting me do it myself?
> His response told me he has little or no confidence in me. He said, "I  just
> washed the counter. I don't want to clean it again."
> Do you know what that does to someone's self esteem?
>
> So, it's not so much me letting him do everything. His stress he has, is
> brought on by himself.
> I may need to fix some things with myself, but God and I are working on it.
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: Deborah Kent Stein
> Sent: Tuesday, August 23, 2011 12:12 PM
> To: NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List
> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
>
>
>
> Dear Nikki,
>
> Great news!  The more you take control, the more your folks are likely to
> see how capable you are.
>
> Debbie
>
> ----- Original Message -----
> From: "Nikki" <daizies304 at comcast.net>
> To: <blparent at nfbnet.org>
> Sent: Tuesday, August 23, 2011 10:03 AM
> Subject: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
>
>
>> Just an update...
>>
>>        Hi all.
>> I want to thank you all for the confidence boost.
>> My dad, son, and I went to meet the teacher yesterday.
>> I asked her if she could email me the handouts and I was very pleased to
>> find out that she would be happy to do it for me.
>> But my dad still requested the paper handouts for himself.
>> IDK why, but it was rather upsetting that he feels he has to be involved.
>>
>> Anyway, success!
>> Oh and I?m going to pick my son up from school, give my dad a break, lol.
>>
>> It?s confusing to me that my parents complain, mainly my dad, about having
>> to do everything, but when I take a stand, it back fires.
>> Meaning, it?s hard for him to accept me being independent.
>>
>> Nikki
>> _______________________________________________
>> blparent mailing list
>> blparent at nfbnet.org
>> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
>> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
>> blparent:
>> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/dkent5817%40att.net
>>
>
>
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>
>
> ------------------------------
>
> Message: 30
> Date: Wed, 24 Aug 2011 09:27:56 -0500
> From: "Barbara Hammel" <poetlori8 at msn.com>
> To: "NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List" <blparent at nfbnet.org>
> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
> Message-ID: <SNT139-ds21FEACE58C8764B3A5EA01EB110 at phx.gbl>
> Content-Type: text/plain; format=flowed; charset="utf-8";
> 	reply-type=response
>
> That may be but is it really done well?
> When I hear that said it makes me feel like there's an "but it could be
> better" or "but I should have just done it myself" silently being added but
> what was done is okay for this moment.
> Barbara
>
>
>
>
> Let every nation know whether it wishes us well or ill, that we shall pay
> any price, bear any burden, meet any hardship, support any friend, oppose
> any foe, in order to assure the survival and the success of liberty.--John
> F. Kennedy
> -----Original Message-----
> From: Nikki
> Sent: Tuesday, August 23, 2011 10:50 PM
> To: NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List
> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
>
>     It means, it's good enough for them.
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: Barbara Hammel
> Sent: Tuesday, August 23, 2011 10:43 PM
> To: NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List
> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
>
> The same feelings one gets when one asks their sighted spouse how the floor
> looks after you ran the vacuum and the response is "It'll do."  What the
> heck does that mean?
> Needless to say, vacuuming doesn't get done near enough.
> Barbara
>
>
>
>
> Let every nation know whether it wishes us well or ill, that we shall pay
> any price, bear any burden, meet any hardship, support any friend, oppose
> any foe, in order to assure the survival and the success of liberty.--John
> F. Kennedy
> -----Original Message-----
> From: Nikki
> Sent: Tuesday, August 23, 2011 4:59 PM
> To: NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List
> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
>
>             Hi Debbie.
> I feel as though I shouldn't have to prove my capabilities to my parents.
> It is MY son, isn't it?
> I shouldn't feel like I'm being controlled just because I live in their
> house, you know?
>
> Rebecca.
> I have a laptop and my parents respect my privacy, so no worries there.
> If anything were to come up, you can be certain I'll make sure they hear
> about it.
> I am the youngest of 2. My older brother lives with his family.
> As far as friends, I have a couple, but not going to talk to them about my
> feelings.
>
> V, my son constantly reminds me and my parents that I'm the boss.
> So, if he wants something and asks my mom, she tells him, "go ask your mom."
> I'm the one in charge.
>
> As far as my dad doing everything, I'm ashamed and embarrassed.
> I get frustrated when we're both in the kitchen, I get the milk and a glass.
> In the midst of what he's doing, stops and takes these items from me and
> pours the glass for me.
> Now, I'm able to do this myself and today, I told him, "what are you doing?
> I can do this myself."
> IDK what exactly he said, but I think he said,"I know." I asked him, "then
> why aren't you letting me do it myself?
> His response told me he has little or no confidence in me. He said, "I  just
> washed the counter. I don't want to clean it again."
> Do you know what that does to someone's self esteem?
>
> So, it's not so much me letting him do everything. His stress he has, is
> brought on by himself.
> I may need to fix some things with myself, but God and I are working on it.
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: Deborah Kent Stein
> Sent: Tuesday, August 23, 2011 12:12 PM
> To: NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List
> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
>
>
>
> Dear Nikki,
>
> Great news!  The more you take control, the more your folks are likely to
> see how capable you are.
>
> Debbie
>
> ----- Original Message -----
> From: "Nikki" <daizies304 at comcast.net>
> To: <blparent at nfbnet.org>
> Sent: Tuesday, August 23, 2011 10:03 AM
> Subject: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
>
>
>> Just an update...
>>
>>        Hi all.
>> I want to thank you all for the confidence boost.
>> My dad, son, and I went to meet the teacher yesterday.
>> I asked her if she could email me the handouts and I was very pleased to
>> find out that she would be happy to do it for me.
>> But my dad still requested the paper handouts for himself.
>> IDK why, but it was rather upsetting that he feels he has to be involved.
>>
>> Anyway, success!
>> Oh and I?m going to pick my son up from school, give my dad a break, lol.
>>
>> It?s confusing to me that my parents complain, mainly my dad, about having
>> to do everything, but when I take a stand, it back fires.
>> Meaning, it?s hard for him to accept me being independent.
>>
>> Nikki
>> _______________________________________________
>> blparent mailing list
>> blparent at nfbnet.org
>> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
>> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
>> blparent:
>> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/dkent5817%40att.net
>>
>
>
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>
>
> ------------------------------
>
> Message: 31
> Date: Wed, 24 Aug 2011 14:30:03 +0000
> From: "Pickrell, Rebecca M (TASC)" <REBECCA.PICKRELL at tasc.com>
> To: 'NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List' <blparent at nfbnet.org>
> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
> Message-ID: <AAE38548E198F64B8E345439B68CCC7832E7ED62 at TSEAMB02>
> Content-Type: text/plain; charset="us-ascii"
>
> Nicky,
> Have you stated this to him calmly? When you do x, I feel y?"
> What has he said about that?
>
> As for the milk, he may have been in a zone, I'm cleaning up the kitchen so
> therefore I own the kitchen at least right now. We all do this. I'd let the
> milk go and focus on the bigger issue which seems to be that he talks about
> you like you don't exist. I'd tell him how this makes you feel and see what
> he says.
> Going back to earlier messages, the list is public so your dad could google
> your name and see your post re needing to get out of there. Not good. I'd
> treat him as you want him to treat you, starting by owning that post and
> appologizing to him.
> Second, if you can't talk to your friends about yourfeelings, you need some
> new friends.
> Lastly, your brother may be just the person you *can* talk to.
> My sister and her husband live with my folks. I understand it's difficult at
> times for all involved. The beauty in talking with each other is that nobody
> knows your parents like a sibling. You can say things that you can't say to
> anybody else and have your sibling understand it. Just because your brother
> is busy with his family doesn't mean he doesn't have time for you. And, I'd
> say that your dad is helping him too re picking up the cousins.  So you two
> have that in common. Take it and bond over it.
>
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org [mailto:blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org] On
> Behalf Of Nikki
> Sent: Wednesday, August 24, 2011 10:21 AM
> To: NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List
> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
>
>     It's a question of him letting me.
> Sometimes I feel like I'm just there.
>
> Like this morning. Walking home from dropping the kid off at school.
> My son's friend's mom was walking with my dad and I. My dad talking about
> how he might need help on MWF's to get the boy from school because he has to
> pick up the cousin's from their school and then drive back here to pick up
> my son.
> They were talking about a way for her to be there for my son in case he's
> late or something.
> I had already said that I was going to pick him up.
>
> I just don't think he has enough confidence in me to walk up to the school
> and get my son.
> I guess it's going to take me doing the task to get him used to it.
> But my point is my dad was talking to her like I don't exist or it's his
> responsibility.
> Or like my son is his kid. Ugh!
> -----Original Message-----
> From: Sheila Leigland
> Sent: Wednesday, August 24, 2011 8:55 AM
> To: NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List
> Subject: Re: [blparent] school teacher - not an issue
>
> Hi nikki it is difficult to control corcumstances when you live at home with
> parents. I know in my situation a long time ago now i felt like I really
> didn't have the right to speak up. It was their house not mine in the same
> way. There was so much that I didn't know about blindness skills. Parents
> don't intend to be mean or controling. They believe they are being helpful.
> I wanted to grow up and felt that I had the right to do so but didn't know
> how to proceed. My vr counselor at the time talked to me about getting an
> apartment and I was so hesetant to talk to my parents about it that an
> apartment was found before I discussed it and my parents found out. They
> were verry upset and hurt. It wasn't my intention to hurt them but that
> happened at least in part because I didn't have enough confidence in myself
> to take the necessary stands. Then I found out that they didn't feel I was
> capable of independence and I became hurt and angry. There was plenty of
> blame to go around. I'm totally blind and I couldn't watch my parents do
> things and learn that way. I needed hands on instruction. I got my apartment
> and worked for around six weeks with a rehab teacher and it helped alot.
> Your dad will come around when he sees that you can do the things that you
> need to do.
>
> _______________________________________________
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>
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>
>
> ------------------------------
>
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>
> End of blparent Digest, Vol 87, Issue 24
> ****************************************
Hi, listers.

I can't tell for sure if my message got through; it doesn't seem to
have. I was trying to thank those who wrote in response to my
questions about managing more than one small child. For the most part,
the people on this list give each other excellent support and help
each other to stay focused on solutions. We haven't made any final
decision, but at least now the issues around blindness are not so
overwhelming and I have a much better perspective on them.

Jen