[blparent] How to tell when your child is smiling or looking at something

[Lisamaria Martinez]

Hello,

Great question and great answers.

It is definitely nice to know when your baby smiles at you. My husband
and friends who are sighted often tell me whether or not my baby is
smiling at me, looking at me or just looking around for me. Although
it is nice to know, I don’t think it is absolutely essential to know
whether your baby is smiling at you to know that you are doing your
job as a mommy.

In the beginning, I definitely did not know when Erik would be smiling
at me or really engaging with me whenever I attempted to play with
him. And, sometimes it makes me a little sad to know I can't see his
beautiful little mouth smiling at me or his two dimples flashing at
me.  I keep hearing about these wonderfully cute dimples. Recently,
daddy got him to smile and I was able to stick my finger in Erik's
dimple. That was pretty cool.

I think though the important thing to really focus on is just playing
with him regardless if you know whether or not he is smiling or
looking at you. In fact, Erik often looks at corners and anywhere but
you unless you really dangle brightly colored things in front of him.
And he does that for everyone. Also, remember you are going to
interact with your baby in a totally unique way that know one else can
duplicate. I feel pretty special when I know I'm one of the few people
who can make my baby smile, laugh, or calm down. And, I feel extra
loved when I am told that little Erik is turning his head all sorts of
way to try and track my voice.

Here are a few things I’ve noticed in my short time as a mommy that
seem to correspond with baby engagement/involvement. Maybe they will
help you too. Also, at the bottom of this email, I’ve included a link
to the Baby Center website. I recently got an email with a link to 20
great games to help boost your baby’s development. I really like what
the article says at one point, “Now that we both know a lot more about
babies — or at least our baby — we know not to expect a lot of
interaction from a newborn. But that doesn't mean playing with your
brand-new baby isn't important.” The author of this quote is sighted.

•	I think body language is really important. If you play with your
baby, and he turns his head to the side he might be over stimulated or
not interested in what you are doing with him.
•	Again body language. If he moves his arms and legs after or during a
funny face he probably is engaged. Is he smiling. Maybe not but you
can imagine it. Or, stick your finger near his mouth. I’ve noticed
that smiling often means a wide open mouth on a baby.
•	Listen. Does he take short breaths? Does he pant? Does his breathing
change at all during or after you play peek-a-boo, make a funny face,
make silly sounds? Chances are he’s engaged if you hear his breathing
change. Eventually, short coos and gurgles will come. And later,
you’ll get a great little laugh.


20 games to boost your baby’s development:
http://www.babycenter.com/0_20-fun-silly-development-boosting-games-to-play-with-your-ba_1479310.bc?scid=momsbaby_20110607:2&pe=MlVBZGhDVnwyMDExMDYwNw..



On 6/8/11, Hai Nguyen Ly <gymnastdave at sbcglobal.net> wrote:
> Hi everyone,
> I have kind of a silly question but I hope someone can help. My two month
> old is definitely interested in being interactive some of the time during
> the day and when I am alone with him, I find it hard to know when he is
> smiling or looking at something. I have rattles and toys and I make faces at
> him but he's not really making a whole lot of sounds to let me know he is
> happy or interested. When my sighted husband is around or my mom is around,
> they tell me when he is smiling or when he is looking at me or a toy, but I
> find it frustrating that when I am alone, I don't feel like I know how to
> effectively interact with him. Any tips on this, or is this something silly
> to be worried about?
> Thanks.
> Ronit
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