[blparent] troubled parent

[Nikki]

    OMG! He has it bad. We've tried talking to him, reminding him of 
consequences,
but it doesn't seem to do justice. Yes, he goes to Kindergarten for 2 1/2 
hours everyday. He only goes for half a day because he's very smart. The 
teacher has to warn him more often than other kids. He's your regular bouncy 
ball. The teacher gave him a special chair to sit in because he can't sit 
still. Doesn't seem to be working. My dad, his papa, said that he should sit 
in one of our wooden chairs quietly all day or unless he's at school. He 
also said that if this doesn't change his behavior, he's going to fulfill 
his threats on spanking.



Hi,

OH sorry to hear about his dad.  As to the time outs,It might drive him nuts 
to have to sit still for 5 minutes, and that might just be the insentive he 
needs to behave.  Does he go to school at all?  I know that when my son 
started school his whole attitude changed because he was more stimulated at 
school, so he was tired when he came home.  He’s one of those never sit down 
kids too, and nothing else worked except the time outs for him because of 
that.  He hates not being part of the action all the time, so he behaves 
better when we remind him what happens when he doesn’t.


Tammy
From: Nikki
Sent: Thursday, March 24, 2011 12:15 AM
To: NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List
Subject: Re: [blparent] troubled parent

    His daddy abandoned him. He doesn't call or write. Time out, huh? Well,
I don't think it would work with my gremlin. He can't sit still. He's gotta
be constantly moving and that's trouble for me because I fatigue easily.

-----Original Message----- 
From: Tammy
Sent: Wednesday, March 23, 2011 10:50 PM
To: NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List
Subject: Re: [blparent] troubled parent

Hi,

Have you tried time outs?  My son is 6 and they work well for us.  Your son
sounds like mine, that is to say that what you describe sounds very typical
of children of that age group.  Also, you say you’re divorced, and I don’t
mean to get too personal, but does your son’s behaviour esculate around
visits from or to his father’?  If so, this might be a trigger, and you may
want to talk to your son about how he feels about being with his dad, verses
being with you.  Don’t make it stressful for him, but just talk to him about
his favourite things at both places, and whatever you do, don’t say anything
negative about his father, even though that’s very hard at times.  He may be
confused about why he has to go back and forth, or even why you’re living
with your parents.  You never know what little kids are thinking and talking
to them can open doors for the two of you that will allow for bonding, and a
closer relationship.  I don’t know if any of this will help, but I’m
divorced from my son’s father, and he has a step-father now, but it’s been a
bumpy road for him.  This may not be the case for you, but talking and
timeouts might just help smooth the bumps a little.

hth

Tammy

From: Nikki
Sent: Wednesday, March 23, 2011 11:26 PM
To: blparent at nfbnet.org
Subject: [blparent] troubled parent

        Nikki here and very distressed. Divorced mother of a 5 year old boy.
Live with parents, ugh!

I need behavioral modifacations other than spanking. He doesn’t listen well,
follow directions, stay focused, and talks when he’s not supposed to.

Wanting to stay away from spanking for punishment. Anyone have any advice
for me?
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