[blparent] Beware those sharp little eyes!

[Pipi]

honestly I find it a very interesting subject and hope it continues. i hope 
a few more people chime in with their answers. it's interesting to see how 
everyone handles the situations that we all will have to deal with at some 
point.
Jo Elizabeth, I applaud you for the way that you handled the bus situation 
with Sarah. As I think of what I've done  in the past, I think that your way 
wasn't a lie yet let her know that even though she found it she'd have to 
wait. Plus the cardboard box bus idea. :)
I think i'm done rambling for now.
Pipi
----- Original Message ----- 
From: "Jo Elizabeth Pinto" <jopinto at msn.com>
To: "NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List" <blparent at nfbnet.org>
Sent: Wednesday, November 09, 2011 4:14 PM
Subject: Re: [blparent] Beware those sharp little eyes!


> Okay, retract the claws and take a deep breath.  I didn't mean to imply, 
> or say in any way, that you fixing your husband's coffee a certain way had 
> anything to do with people putting weird things into my food.  I was 
> replying to Sheila's post, and that's all.  Maybe we should just drop this 
> whole thing?
>
> Jo Elizabeth
>
> "How far you go in life depends on you being tender with the young, 
> compassionate with the aged, sympathetic with the striving, and tolerant 
> of the weak and the strong.  Because someday in life you will have been 
> all of these."--George Washington Carver, 1864-1943, American scientist
>
> --------------------------------------------------
> From: "Erin Rumer" <erinrumer at gmail.com>
> Sent: Wednesday, November 09, 2011 3:06 PM
> To: "'NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List'" <blparent at nfbnet.org>
> Subject: Re: [blparent] Beware those sharp little eyes!
>
>> Okay, stop making it sound like I'm sneaking funny things into my 
>> husband's
>> food, but rather I'm simply trying to help take the best care of him and
>> look out for his health.  I just called my husband at work since he's on
>> break to talk to him about this and see if it's ever really bothered him 
>> and
>> he told me that he reminded me that I told him back at the start that I 
>> was
>> going to do that to his coffee if I had to make it because I was against 
>> him
>> drinking caffeine so late at night.  He also told me not to get caught up
>> with the accusations some are making because he knows that I'm not being
>> controlling in the least, but love him so much I just want him to be as
>> healthy as possible.  My husband then thanked me for looking out for him 
>> so
>> much and we came to an agreement that he'll drink coffee like that only 
>> on
>> the weekends since he knows that's not the best for him.  I had siblings
>> that did strange things to my food as a kid and I'd never do that to 
>> anyone
>> so don't blow things out of proportion and compare me trying to cut my
>> husband's caffeine intake to that.
>>
>> Erin
>>
>> -----Original Message-----
>> From: blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org [mailto:blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org] On
>> Behalf Of Jo Elizabeth Pinto
>> Sent: Wednesday, November 09, 2011 2:52 PM
>> To: NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List
>> Subject: Re: [blparent] Beware those sharp little eyes!
>>
>> Now, that I hate.  My brother and sister and even my dad used to do weird
>> things to my food, like putting cheese or sour cream on when they knew I
>> didn't like it, or slipping gummy bears into my pot pie.  To this day, I 
>> I'm
>> really careful about who serves me a plate if we go to a party and it's a
>> buffet kind of thing.  And that bit about open your mouth and close your
>> eyes, here it comes, your big surprise--forget it!  I won't do that for
>> anybody, ever.
>>
>> Jo Elizabeth
>>
>> "How far you go in life depends on you being tender with the young,
>> compassionate with the aged, sympathetic with the striving, and tolerant 
>> of
>> the weak and the strong.  Because someday in life you will have been all 
>> of
>> these."--George Washington Carver, 1864-1943, American scientist
>>
>> --------------------------------------------------
>> From: "Sheila Leigland" <sleigland at bresnan.net>
>> Sent: Wednesday, November 09, 2011 2:32 PM
>> To: "NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List" <blparent at nfbnet.org>
>> Subject: Re: [blparent] Beware those sharp little eyes!
>>
>>> People do weird things my aunt who has since moved away loved doing
>>> this kind of stuff like putting sour cream in a baked potato enen
>>> though I don't like it because she thought I wouldnt Notice because
>>> I'm blind. Or giving a coffee flavored dessert and I do't like or
>>> drink coffee and laugh because of course I notice. Very sstrange
>>> woman.
>>>
>>> Sheila Leigland
>>>
>>> -----Original Message-----
>>> From: Pickrell, Rebecca M (TASC) <REBECCA.PICKRELL at tasc.com>
>>> Sent: Wednesday, November 09, 2011 1:39 PM
>>> To: 'NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List' <blparent at nfbnet.org>
>>> Subject: Re: [blparent] Beware those sharp little eyes!
>>>
>>> This bothers me re the husband. He's an adult, he can put a legal
>>> substance into his body without you giving it the okay.
>>> Now, if he's asked you to do this, then fine but this just seems a bit
>>> controling to me Sneaking stuff into food or out of food totally
>>> creeps me out.
>>> And if he is unaware of what you're doing, he can give inaccurate
>>> health information to his doctor. Or, do you control that aspect too?
>>>
>>>
>>> -----Original Message-----
>>> From: blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org [mailto:blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org]
>>> On Behalf Of Erin Rumer
>>> Sent: Wednesday, November 09, 2011 3:31 PM
>>> To: 'NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List'
>>> Subject: Re: [blparent] Beware those sharp little eyes!
>>>
>>> I think we need to be careful not to read too much into these kinds of
>>> things.  My parents could get away with certain things with my sighted
>>> siblings that they couldn't with me and my sighted siblings aren't
>>> bitter with them for that at all.  We were all treated equally but my
>>> parents were smart and new what things they could do with each of us
>>> as individuals.
>>> For
>>> example, my sighted younger sister is not very observant so my mom new
>>> she could sneak veggies into the meatloaf right in front of her
>>> because she probably wouldn't even be paying attention.  With me
>>> however, I could smell the veggies from a mile away and new right away
>>> my mom was using them in the meat loaf which I loved, but you get the
>>> point.  Heck, there's things I do in front of my sighted husband that
>>> he's unaware of, like give him decaf coffee instead of the real stuff
>>> because I know it's better for him and he's addicted to having too
>>> much caffeine at night.  It's a win-win because he feels more awake
>>> since he thinks he got the leaded stuff and I know I'm helping his
>>> health.
>>>
>>> Erin
>>>
>>> -----Original Message-----
>>> From: blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org [mailto:blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org]
>>> On Behalf Of Marla Wertman
>>> Sent: Wednesday, November 09, 2011 12:50 PM
>>> To: NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List
>>> Subject: Re: [blparent] Beware those sharp little eyes!
>>>
>>> I think as blind adults though we need to be careful about this.  I
>>> know it is just something as simple is buying a birthday present with
>>> blind child right there, and it's easy to get away with because they
>>> can't see it, but I see it is taking advantage of the fact that they
>>> can't see. To me that is close to lying.Maybe I'm not explaining this
>>> right, but my parents never did things like this to me.  I was treated
>>> just like my sighted brother, because they wanted me to grow up as
>>> normal is possible.
>>> On Wed, 09 Nov 2011 12:43:36 -0700
>>> "Erin Rumer" <erinrumer at gmail.com> wrote:
>>>
>>>> Oh, let me tell you that I was an observant little thing but my mom
>>>> new just the ways to distract me to keep my mind off what was going
>>>> in the cart when I was young enough.  It probably helped a ton that I
>>>> have always been super sociable and chatting with her and others in
>>>> the store was way more fun than items being pulled off the shelves.
>>>> Obviously this was easier than if I had sight and could see exactly
>>>> what
>>> was going into the cart.
>>>>
>>>> Erin
>>>>
>>>> -----Original Message-----
>>>> From: blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org
>>>> [mailto:blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org]
>>>> On Behalf Of Pickrell, Rebecca M (TASC)
>>>> Sent: Wednesday, November 09, 2011 12:25 PM
>>>> To: 'NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List'
>>>> Subject: Re: [blparent] Beware those sharp little eyes!
>>>>
>>>> Thank you for this.
>>>> I may disagree with you that a child who is blind would be unaware of
>>>> stuff longer, that sure didn't work with me from what my parents tell
>>>> me That may depend on the child/person though, some of us just like
>>>> to observe and pay attention and there are many ways to do this
>>>> without being
>>> obvious about it.
>>>>
>>>>
>>>> -----Original Message-----
>>>> From: blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org
>>>> [mailto:blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org]
>>>> On Behalf Of Erin Rumer
>>>> Sent: Wednesday, November 09, 2011 2:18 PM
>>>> To: 'NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List'
>>>> Subject: Re: [blparent] Beware those sharp little eyes!
>>>>
>>>> Rebecca, I totally agree with what you're saying but please let me
>>>> clarify since we're talking about two different things.  I'm
>>>> referring to parents cutting corners with kids young enough to be
>>>> totally unaware of what's going on.  Naturally, this would last a
>>>> little longer with a blind child because the parent has the advantage
>>>> of the kid not being able to see what's in the cart.  I guess why it
>>>> really didn't bother me was because I didn't know it was happening
>>>> since I was young enough and didn't find out that my folks were doing
>>>> this until I was much older.  My folks didn't do this with me as an
>>>> older child and I think that's where the difference lies.  It's like
>>>> getting something for your baby because they're a baby and don't know
>>>> the difference and no one would think any different about cutting
>>>> that corner and that's all I mean.  If you're old enough to be aware
>>>> of it happening and parents are still doing it then that is wrong for
>> sure.
>>>> When it came to wrapping the gifts my mom had me help her with
>>>> wrapping everyone's gifts for years before I even thought about my
>>>> own gifts being placed into my own little paws which was always a
>>>> very special privilege that the other kids didn't get.  When I was
>>>> getting older and came across one that I felt might be mine my mom
>>>> would say, "You don't want to spoil your fun for Christmas do you?"
>>>> and I smiled sheepishly and continued wrapping since it was such a
>>>> fun thing to share with mom and didn't bother me.  If my mom saw at
>>>> all that I was bothered by this and felt taken advantage of then she
>>>> would have stopped for sure.  Every kid's different as we all know
>>>> and some things
>>> bother one that don't bother another and that's where it's important
>>> to be receptive parents and treat each kid as an individuals.
>>>>
>>>> Thanks,
>>>>
>>>> Erin
>>>>
>>>> As far as kids finding gifts in hidden places goes, I'd just do what
>>>> my parents would do which was tell me that Santa can't store
>>>> everything for all the children in the world at the North Pole and so
>>>> they have parents store some gifts ahead of time to help him out.
>>>>
>>>> -----Original Message-----
>>>> From: blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org
>>>> [mailto:blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org]
>>>> On Behalf Of Pickrell, Rebecca M (TASC)
>>>> Sent: Wednesday, November 09, 2011 11:38 AM
>>>> To: 'NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List'
>>>> Subject: Re: [blparent] Beware those sharp little eyes!
>>>>
>>>> It matters if it hurts the person who is having the corners cut.
>>>> I don't recall my parents doing this, they went to great lengths to
>>>> keep stuff a surprise which I do appreciate.
>>>> Cutting corners is say, skipping a bath or having PB&J for supper
>>>> every now and then.
>>>> Would you feel this way if somebody planned a party for you and said
>>>> "f*** it, I didn't decorate because I knew you couldn't see it"? Or
>>>> "I could have gotten you a really neat kick with something you love
>>>> on it, but since you can't see it, I just picked one up at Giant?"
>>>>
>>>>
>>>>
>>>> -----Original Message-----
>>>> From: blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org
>>>> [mailto:blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org]
>>>> On Behalf Of Erin Rumer
>>>> Sent: Wednesday, November 09, 2011 1:07 PM
>>>> To: 'NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List'
>>>> Subject: Re: [blparent] Beware those sharp little eyes!
>>>>
>>>> My parents got my gifts with me there at the store as well and I've
>>>> got to say I don't blame them.  It's enough work to try and shop and
>>>> organize holiday details so why not cut corners where you can.  Heck,
>>>> I'd do it if my kid was blind! SMILING  My mom would even have me
>>>> wrap some of my gifts if they were in unidentifiable boxes which
>>>> killed me and made me laugh all at the same time.  With Dawson I'm
>>>> going to take a trick from my mother-in-law and wrap the gifts inside
>>>> other things that are totally different shapes from the actual gifts.
>>>> For example, taking a old blanket that's not being used and wrapping
>>>> something smaller inside of that or hiding a gift inside a big ball
>>>> of newspaper.  It doesn't have to be pretty, just has to do the trick.
>>>>
>>>> Erin
>>>>
>>>> -----Original Message-----
>>>> From: blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org
>>>> [mailto:blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org]
>>>> On Behalf Of Lisamaria Martinez
>>>> Sent: Wednesday, November 09, 2011 10:30 AM
>>>> To: NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List
>>>> Subject: Re: [blparent] Beware those sharp little eyes!
>>>>
>>>> You know, my parents wrapped my gifts in front of me too. In fact,
>>>> they'd shop for them in front of me. I thought it was rude and
>>>> totally unfair to do that just because I couldn't see.
>>>>
>>>> LM
>>>>
>>>> On 11/9/11, Jo Elizabeth Pinto <jopinto at msn.com> wrote:
>>>> > Hi.  For any of you moms who have little ones starting to run
>>>> > around and get into things, I thought I'd warn you about something
>>>> > I just learned the hard way.  *Smile.*  They'll see everything,
>>>> > especially what you don't want them to, and they'll remember.
>>>> > They're smarter than
>>>> we give them credit for.
>>>> >
>>>> > I bought Sarah the Little People school bus because she's really
>>>> > into buses and planes and the like right now.  The package came
>>>> > from Amazon while she was at preschool about a month ago, and I
>>>> > threw the boxes in the recycling bin and hid the toy at the top of
>>>> > my closet, thinking I was
>>>> pretty slick.
>>>> > Well, she saw part of a picture on one box sticking out of the bin.
>>>> > She asked about it, and I glossed over it.  We moved on, and I
>>>> > thought she'd forgotten about the bus.
>>>> >
>>>> > So this morning, I went to get a shirt from the closet, and Sarah
>>>> > wandered in behind me.  All at once, she started jumping up and
>>>> > down, saying, "I see it!  Up there!  The bus toy really is here!  I
>>>> > want that
>>>> bus toy!"
>>>> >
>>>> > I guess I didn't hide it well enough.  She saw the box peeking out
>>>> > from under a blanket on a high shelf and remembered the picture
>>>> > from the recycling bin.  She had a bit of a meltdown because she
>>>> > knew the toy was there, but I wouldn't get it off the shelf for
>>>> > her.  I couldn't really explain why, either.  Now Santa Claus can't
>>>> > bring that toy to her, either, because it'll blow his cover.  I'll
>>>> > have to give it to her from Mom and Dad, or maybe from her brother
>> Stephen.
>>>> > Anyway, my point is, when I was a kid, my family could (and did)
>>>> > wrap my presents right in front of me.  But obviously, blind
>>>> > parents of sighted kids have to be very careful about these things.
>>>> >
>>>> > Jo Elizabeth
>>>> >
>>>> > "How far you go in life depends on you being tender with the young,
>>>> > compassionate with the aged, sympathetic with the striving, and
>>>> > tolerant of the weak and the strong.  Because someday in life you
>>>> > will have been all of these."--George Washington Carver, 1864-1943,
>>>> > American scientist _______________________________________________
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>>>> >
>>>>
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