[blparent] Beware those sharp little eyes!
Deborah Kent Stein
dkent5817 at att.net
Wed Nov 9 23:50:41 UTC 2011
On the topic of bending the truth, what is Santa Claus, after all?
----- Original Message -----
From: "Pipi" <blahblahblah0822 at gmail.com>
To: "NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List" <blparent at nfbnet.org>
Sent: Wednesday, November 09, 2011 4:25 PM
Subject: Re: [blparent] Beware those sharp little eyes!
> honestly I find it a very interesting subject and hope it continues. i
> hope a few more people chime in with their answers. it's interesting to
> see how everyone handles the situations that we all will have to deal with
> at some point.
> Jo Elizabeth, I applaud you for the way that you handled the bus situation
> with Sarah. As I think of what I've done in the past, I think that your
> way wasn't a lie yet let her know that even though she found it she'd have
> to wait. Plus the cardboard box bus idea. :)
> I think i'm done rambling for now.
> Pipi
> ----- Original Message -----
> From: "Jo Elizabeth Pinto" <jopinto at msn.com>
> To: "NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List" <blparent at nfbnet.org>
> Sent: Wednesday, November 09, 2011 4:14 PM
> Subject: Re: [blparent] Beware those sharp little eyes!
>
>
>> Okay, retract the claws and take a deep breath. I didn't mean to imply,
>> or say in any way, that you fixing your husband's coffee a certain way
>> had anything to do with people putting weird things into my food. I was
>> replying to Sheila's post, and that's all. Maybe we should just drop
>> this whole thing?
>>
>> Jo Elizabeth
>>
>> "How far you go in life depends on you being tender with the young,
>> compassionate with the aged, sympathetic with the striving, and tolerant
>> of the weak and the strong. Because someday in life you will have been
>> all of these."--George Washington Carver, 1864-1943, American scientist
>>
>> --------------------------------------------------
>> From: "Erin Rumer" <erinrumer at gmail.com>
>> Sent: Wednesday, November 09, 2011 3:06 PM
>> To: "'NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List'" <blparent at nfbnet.org>
>> Subject: Re: [blparent] Beware those sharp little eyes!
>>
>>> Okay, stop making it sound like I'm sneaking funny things into my
>>> husband's
>>> food, but rather I'm simply trying to help take the best care of him and
>>> look out for his health. I just called my husband at work since he's on
>>> break to talk to him about this and see if it's ever really bothered him
>>> and
>>> he told me that he reminded me that I told him back at the start that I
>>> was
>>> going to do that to his coffee if I had to make it because I was against
>>> him
>>> drinking caffeine so late at night. He also told me not to get caught
>>> up
>>> with the accusations some are making because he knows that I'm not being
>>> controlling in the least, but love him so much I just want him to be as
>>> healthy as possible. My husband then thanked me for looking out for him
>>> so
>>> much and we came to an agreement that he'll drink coffee like that only
>>> on
>>> the weekends since he knows that's not the best for him. I had siblings
>>> that did strange things to my food as a kid and I'd never do that to
>>> anyone
>>> so don't blow things out of proportion and compare me trying to cut my
>>> husband's caffeine intake to that.
>>>
>>> Erin
>>>
>>> -----Original Message-----
>>> From: blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org [mailto:blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org]
>>> On
>>> Behalf Of Jo Elizabeth Pinto
>>> Sent: Wednesday, November 09, 2011 2:52 PM
>>> To: NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List
>>> Subject: Re: [blparent] Beware those sharp little eyes!
>>>
>>> Now, that I hate. My brother and sister and even my dad used to do
>>> weird
>>> things to my food, like putting cheese or sour cream on when they knew I
>>> didn't like it, or slipping gummy bears into my pot pie. To this day, I
>>> I'm
>>> really careful about who serves me a plate if we go to a party and it's
>>> a
>>> buffet kind of thing. And that bit about open your mouth and close your
>>> eyes, here it comes, your big surprise--forget it! I won't do that for
>>> anybody, ever.
>>>
>>> Jo Elizabeth
>>>
>>> "How far you go in life depends on you being tender with the young,
>>> compassionate with the aged, sympathetic with the striving, and tolerant
>>> of
>>> the weak and the strong. Because someday in life you will have been all
>>> of
>>> these."--George Washington Carver, 1864-1943, American scientist
>>>
>>> --------------------------------------------------
>>> From: "Sheila Leigland" <sleigland at bresnan.net>
>>> Sent: Wednesday, November 09, 2011 2:32 PM
>>> To: "NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List" <blparent at nfbnet.org>
>>> Subject: Re: [blparent] Beware those sharp little eyes!
>>>
>>>> People do weird things my aunt who has since moved away loved doing
>>>> this kind of stuff like putting sour cream in a baked potato enen
>>>> though I don't like it because she thought I wouldnt Notice because
>>>> I'm blind. Or giving a coffee flavored dessert and I do't like or
>>>> drink coffee and laugh because of course I notice. Very sstrange
>>>> woman.
>>>>
>>>> Sheila Leigland
>>>>
>>>> -----Original Message-----
>>>> From: Pickrell, Rebecca M (TASC) <REBECCA.PICKRELL at tasc.com>
>>>> Sent: Wednesday, November 09, 2011 1:39 PM
>>>> To: 'NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List' <blparent at nfbnet.org>
>>>> Subject: Re: [blparent] Beware those sharp little eyes!
>>>>
>>>> This bothers me re the husband. He's an adult, he can put a legal
>>>> substance into his body without you giving it the okay.
>>>> Now, if he's asked you to do this, then fine but this just seems a bit
>>>> controling to me Sneaking stuff into food or out of food totally
>>>> creeps me out.
>>>> And if he is unaware of what you're doing, he can give inaccurate
>>>> health information to his doctor. Or, do you control that aspect too?
>>>>
>>>>
>>>> -----Original Message-----
>>>> From: blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org [mailto:blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org]
>>>> On Behalf Of Erin Rumer
>>>> Sent: Wednesday, November 09, 2011 3:31 PM
>>>> To: 'NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List'
>>>> Subject: Re: [blparent] Beware those sharp little eyes!
>>>>
>>>> I think we need to be careful not to read too much into these kinds of
>>>> things. My parents could get away with certain things with my sighted
>>>> siblings that they couldn't with me and my sighted siblings aren't
>>>> bitter with them for that at all. We were all treated equally but my
>>>> parents were smart and new what things they could do with each of us
>>>> as individuals.
>>>> For
>>>> example, my sighted younger sister is not very observant so my mom new
>>>> she could sneak veggies into the meatloaf right in front of her
>>>> because she probably wouldn't even be paying attention. With me
>>>> however, I could smell the veggies from a mile away and new right away
>>>> my mom was using them in the meat loaf which I loved, but you get the
>>>> point. Heck, there's things I do in front of my sighted husband that
>>>> he's unaware of, like give him decaf coffee instead of the real stuff
>>>> because I know it's better for him and he's addicted to having too
>>>> much caffeine at night. It's a win-win because he feels more awake
>>>> since he thinks he got the leaded stuff and I know I'm helping his
>>>> health.
>>>>
>>>> Erin
>>>>
>>>> -----Original Message-----
>>>> From: blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org [mailto:blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org]
>>>> On Behalf Of Marla Wertman
>>>> Sent: Wednesday, November 09, 2011 12:50 PM
>>>> To: NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List
>>>> Subject: Re: [blparent] Beware those sharp little eyes!
>>>>
>>>> I think as blind adults though we need to be careful about this. I
>>>> know it is just something as simple is buying a birthday present with
>>>> blind child right there, and it's easy to get away with because they
>>>> can't see it, but I see it is taking advantage of the fact that they
>>>> can't see. To me that is close to lying.Maybe I'm not explaining this
>>>> right, but my parents never did things like this to me. I was treated
>>>> just like my sighted brother, because they wanted me to grow up as
>>>> normal is possible.
>>>> On Wed, 09 Nov 2011 12:43:36 -0700
>>>> "Erin Rumer" <erinrumer at gmail.com> wrote:
>>>>
>>>>> Oh, let me tell you that I was an observant little thing but my mom
>>>>> new just the ways to distract me to keep my mind off what was going
>>>>> in the cart when I was young enough. It probably helped a ton that I
>>>>> have always been super sociable and chatting with her and others in
>>>>> the store was way more fun than items being pulled off the shelves.
>>>>> Obviously this was easier than if I had sight and could see exactly
>>>>> what
>>>> was going into the cart.
>>>>>
>>>>> Erin
>>>>>
>>>>> -----Original Message-----
>>>>> From: blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org
>>>>> [mailto:blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org]
>>>>> On Behalf Of Pickrell, Rebecca M (TASC)
>>>>> Sent: Wednesday, November 09, 2011 12:25 PM
>>>>> To: 'NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List'
>>>>> Subject: Re: [blparent] Beware those sharp little eyes!
>>>>>
>>>>> Thank you for this.
>>>>> I may disagree with you that a child who is blind would be unaware of
>>>>> stuff longer, that sure didn't work with me from what my parents tell
>>>>> me That may depend on the child/person though, some of us just like
>>>>> to observe and pay attention and there are many ways to do this
>>>>> without being
>>>> obvious about it.
>>>>>
>>>>>
>>>>> -----Original Message-----
>>>>> From: blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org
>>>>> [mailto:blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org]
>>>>> On Behalf Of Erin Rumer
>>>>> Sent: Wednesday, November 09, 2011 2:18 PM
>>>>> To: 'NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List'
>>>>> Subject: Re: [blparent] Beware those sharp little eyes!
>>>>>
>>>>> Rebecca, I totally agree with what you're saying but please let me
>>>>> clarify since we're talking about two different things. I'm
>>>>> referring to parents cutting corners with kids young enough to be
>>>>> totally unaware of what's going on. Naturally, this would last a
>>>>> little longer with a blind child because the parent has the advantage
>>>>> of the kid not being able to see what's in the cart. I guess why it
>>>>> really didn't bother me was because I didn't know it was happening
>>>>> since I was young enough and didn't find out that my folks were doing
>>>>> this until I was much older. My folks didn't do this with me as an
>>>>> older child and I think that's where the difference lies. It's like
>>>>> getting something for your baby because they're a baby and don't know
>>>>> the difference and no one would think any different about cutting
>>>>> that corner and that's all I mean. If you're old enough to be aware
>>>>> of it happening and parents are still doing it then that is wrong for
>>> sure.
>>>>> When it came to wrapping the gifts my mom had me help her with
>>>>> wrapping everyone's gifts for years before I even thought about my
>>>>> own gifts being placed into my own little paws which was always a
>>>>> very special privilege that the other kids didn't get. When I was
>>>>> getting older and came across one that I felt might be mine my mom
>>>>> would say, "You don't want to spoil your fun for Christmas do you?"
>>>>> and I smiled sheepishly and continued wrapping since it was such a
>>>>> fun thing to share with mom and didn't bother me. If my mom saw at
>>>>> all that I was bothered by this and felt taken advantage of then she
>>>>> would have stopped for sure. Every kid's different as we all know
>>>>> and some things
>>>> bother one that don't bother another and that's where it's important
>>>> to be receptive parents and treat each kid as an individuals.
>>>>>
>>>>> Thanks,
>>>>>
>>>>> Erin
>>>>>
>>>>> As far as kids finding gifts in hidden places goes, I'd just do what
>>>>> my parents would do which was tell me that Santa can't store
>>>>> everything for all the children in the world at the North Pole and so
>>>>> they have parents store some gifts ahead of time to help him out.
>>>>>
>>>>> -----Original Message-----
>>>>> From: blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org
>>>>> [mailto:blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org]
>>>>> On Behalf Of Pickrell, Rebecca M (TASC)
>>>>> Sent: Wednesday, November 09, 2011 11:38 AM
>>>>> To: 'NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List'
>>>>> Subject: Re: [blparent] Beware those sharp little eyes!
>>>>>
>>>>> It matters if it hurts the person who is having the corners cut.
>>>>> I don't recall my parents doing this, they went to great lengths to
>>>>> keep stuff a surprise which I do appreciate.
>>>>> Cutting corners is say, skipping a bath or having PB&J for supper
>>>>> every now and then.
>>>>> Would you feel this way if somebody planned a party for you and said
>>>>> "f*** it, I didn't decorate because I knew you couldn't see it"? Or
>>>>> "I could have gotten you a really neat kick with something you love
>>>>> on it, but since you can't see it, I just picked one up at Giant?"
>>>>>
>>>>>
>>>>>
>>>>> -----Original Message-----
>>>>> From: blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org
>>>>> [mailto:blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org]
>>>>> On Behalf Of Erin Rumer
>>>>> Sent: Wednesday, November 09, 2011 1:07 PM
>>>>> To: 'NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List'
>>>>> Subject: Re: [blparent] Beware those sharp little eyes!
>>>>>
>>>>> My parents got my gifts with me there at the store as well and I've
>>>>> got to say I don't blame them. It's enough work to try and shop and
>>>>> organize holiday details so why not cut corners where you can. Heck,
>>>>> I'd do it if my kid was blind! SMILING My mom would even have me
>>>>> wrap some of my gifts if they were in unidentifiable boxes which
>>>>> killed me and made me laugh all at the same time. With Dawson I'm
>>>>> going to take a trick from my mother-in-law and wrap the gifts inside
>>>>> other things that are totally different shapes from the actual gifts.
>>>>> For example, taking a old blanket that's not being used and wrapping
>>>>> something smaller inside of that or hiding a gift inside a big ball
>>>>> of newspaper. It doesn't have to be pretty, just has to do the trick.
>>>>>
>>>>> Erin
>>>>>
>>>>> -----Original Message-----
>>>>> From: blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org
>>>>> [mailto:blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org]
>>>>> On Behalf Of Lisamaria Martinez
>>>>> Sent: Wednesday, November 09, 2011 10:30 AM
>>>>> To: NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List
>>>>> Subject: Re: [blparent] Beware those sharp little eyes!
>>>>>
>>>>> You know, my parents wrapped my gifts in front of me too. In fact,
>>>>> they'd shop for them in front of me. I thought it was rude and
>>>>> totally unfair to do that just because I couldn't see.
>>>>>
>>>>> LM
>>>>>
>>>>> On 11/9/11, Jo Elizabeth Pinto <jopinto at msn.com> wrote:
>>>>> > Hi. For any of you moms who have little ones starting to run
>>>>> > around and get into things, I thought I'd warn you about something
>>>>> > I just learned the hard way. *Smile.* They'll see everything,
>>>>> > especially what you don't want them to, and they'll remember.
>>>>> > They're smarter than
>>>>> we give them credit for.
>>>>> >
>>>>> > I bought Sarah the Little People school bus because she's really
>>>>> > into buses and planes and the like right now. The package came
>>>>> > from Amazon while she was at preschool about a month ago, and I
>>>>> > threw the boxes in the recycling bin and hid the toy at the top of
>>>>> > my closet, thinking I was
>>>>> pretty slick.
>>>>> > Well, she saw part of a picture on one box sticking out of the bin.
>>>>> > She asked about it, and I glossed over it. We moved on, and I
>>>>> > thought she'd forgotten about the bus.
>>>>> >
>>>>> > So this morning, I went to get a shirt from the closet, and Sarah
>>>>> > wandered in behind me. All at once, she started jumping up and
>>>>> > down, saying, "I see it! Up there! The bus toy really is here! I
>>>>> > want that
>>>>> bus toy!"
>>>>> >
>>>>> > I guess I didn't hide it well enough. She saw the box peeking out
>>>>> > from under a blanket on a high shelf and remembered the picture
>>>>> > from the recycling bin. She had a bit of a meltdown because she
>>>>> > knew the toy was there, but I wouldn't get it off the shelf for
>>>>> > her. I couldn't really explain why, either. Now Santa Claus can't
>>>>> > bring that toy to her, either, because it'll blow his cover. I'll
>>>>> > have to give it to her from Mom and Dad, or maybe from her brother
>>> Stephen.
>>>>> > Anyway, my point is, when I was a kid, my family could (and did)
>>>>> > wrap my presents right in front of me. But obviously, blind
>>>>> > parents of sighted kids have to be very careful about these things.
>>>>> >
>>>>> > Jo Elizabeth
>>>>> >
>>>>> > "How far you go in life depends on you being tender with the young,
>>>>> > compassionate with the aged, sympathetic with the striving, and
>>>>> > tolerant of the weak and the strong. Because someday in life you
>>>>> > will have been all of these."--George Washington Carver, 1864-1943,
>>>>> > American scientist _______________________________________________
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>>>>> > 0g
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>>>>> >
>>>>>
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