[blparent] How do you know you're a mother? (time to lighten up and laugh)

Wed Jan 11 05:15:50 UTC 2012

Jo Elizabeth,

This was great. So, if these are indications that you are a mother, than I 
guess I'm one too. ;)

Best,
-Mark

Jo Elizabeth Pinto writes:

> Yup, that would be true.  I could really relate to the pooping without an 
> audience thing.
> 
> Jo Elizabeth
> 
> "How far you go in life depends on you being tender with the young, 
> compassionate with the aged, sympathetic with the striving, and tolerant of 
> the weak and the strong.  Because someday in life you will have been all of 
> these."--George Washington Carver, 1864-1943, American scientist
> 
> --------------------------------------------------
> From: "Pipi" <blahblahblah0822 at gmail.com>
> Sent: Tuesday, January 10, 2012 9:32 PM
> To: "NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List" <blparent at nfbnet.org>
> Subject: Re: [blparent] How do you know you're a mother? (time to lighten 
> upandlaugh)
> 
>> hahaha thanks for this.
>> i can relate to so many of these.
>> mine would be when a 10 minute shower became equivalent to the luxury of a 
>> weekend at a spa.
>> ----- Original Message ----- 
>> From: "Jo Elizabeth Pinto" <jopinto at msn.com>
>> To: "NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List" <blparent at nfbnet.org>
>> Sent: Tuesday, January 10, 2012 6:37 PM
>> Subject: [blparent] How do you know you're a mother? (time to lighten up 
>> andlaugh)
>>
>>
>>>I saw this and thought I'd share.  A little gross, don't read if you're 
>>>squeamish, but it never hurts to laugh.
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>> Jo Elizabeth
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>> A few months ago, I was in the grocery store roaming the bread isle. 
>>> Wheat, white, pita, English muffins ... Boring, boring, boring. And, then 
>>> I spotted it: Goldfish Sandwich Bread. There, right in between the milk 
>>> and the exotic food aisle, I squealed. Bread, in the shape of a giant 
>>> Goldfish cracker?! My kids would be psyched!! This was the best trip to 
>>> Safeway EVER!!! Wooo-hooo!
>>>
>>> And, then it hit me: I am such a mother.
>>>
>>> I asked my friends for their "motherhood moments" and the answers made me 
>>> laugh -- I can relate to every single one ... What about you?
>>>
>>> 25. Your new accessories consist of boogers, spit up and pieces of food 
>>> on your outfit.  -- Monica
>>>
>>> 24. Your kid starts to throw up and you hold out your hands to catch it 
>>> because you're no where near the toilet. Then you hold the crying child, 
>>> getting barf in your hair and that's the least of your concerns. -- Amy
>>>
>>> 23. When going grocery shopping alone is considered "Me time" -- Lizette
>>>
>>> 22. You quietly wipe a butt (and remember to not flush!) while on a 
>>> business call. --- Laura
>>>
>>> 21. Your six year old daughter has more shoes and a cuter wardrobe than 
>>> you. -- Patti
>>>
>>> 20. You pick someone else's boogers and it's no big deal. -- Melissa
>>>
>>> 19. You actually like driving a mini van. -- Jody
>>>
>>> 18. When you know 1 million things to clean with BABY WIPES! -- Diana
>>>
>>> 17. When you feel the need to stick a bottle in the mouth of anyone 
>>> upset. -- Michelle
>>>
>>> 16. You carry human teeth in your purse.  -- Penny
>>>
>>> 15. You just forced them into bed and you've had enough then an hour 
>>> later you're bawling your eyes out at their baby pics. -- Nermeen
>>>
>>> 14. You hold your poop till 11 p.m. so that you can go without an 
>>> audience... -- Evin
>>>
>>> 13. ?"What kind of poop was it?" counts as stimulating conversation.  --  
>>> JoAnna
>>>
>>> 12.  When you jam out to the Mickey Mouse Clubhouse song while driving 
>>> and realize you just dropped off the little one at daycare. -- LeKisha
>>>
>>> 11. When you have extra underwear and leggings and emergency fruit snacks 
>>> stashed in your purse and glove compartment at all times! --- Kathryn
>>>
>>> 10. You can do 6 different things at the same time.  -- Donna
>>>
>>> 9. You hear a kid going bananas in public and as soon as you see it's not 
>>> yours, you're thrilled.  -- Stacey
>>>
>>> 8. Walk out of the house, realize there's poop on your shirt, and scrape 
>>> it off with your nail instead of going back inside to change. -- Erin
>>>
>>> 7. When you hear someone else's newborn do her little gurgle cry and you 
>>> think "awww, I wish I could hold her" rather than "OMG make it stop!" --  
>>> Brandy
>>>
>>> 6. You are more likely to find cheese sticks, diapers and yogurt in your 
>>> purse than a mirror. -- Liana
>>>
>>> 5. You spent half the day with a "You Went Potty!!!!" sticker in your 
>>> hair and no one told you. -- Tiffany
>>>
>>> 4. You have embraced the fact that an uninterrupted nap excites you more 
>>> than uninterrupted sex. -- Kimberly
>>>
>>> 3. You clench your nether regions just before a sneeze so you don't 
>>> pee. -- Kelly
>>>
>>> 2. You eat a rogue Froot Loop off the floor and never think twice. And 
>>> you don't even look around to see if someone's watching. -- Susan
>>>
>>> 1. The last thing you do on a vacation is relax.  -- Kimberly
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>> How did you know you were a mother?
>>>
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>>
>>
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