[blparent] blparent Digest, Vol 92, Issue 35

[Nikki]

I sent a note to the teacher asking her to email me. I haven't done anything 
but spank him. I speak firm to let him know I'm unhappy with his behavior. 
He really wants to go bowling. In the midst of all the yellows, he was able 
to get a green, but then went back to yellow. Last week he got an orange. 
I'm going to ask the teacher what the circumstances were when he got these 
great days, but then the next day wasn't so good. She said in yesterday's 
note that she's concerned about his disruptive behavior. his behavior is 
somewhat embarrassing because it reflects home life, don't you think?

I'm wondering if he's just bored, not challenged enough, IDK. This question 
has been brought up before.

-----Original Message----- 
From: Jennifer Bose
Sent: Tuesday, January 31, 2012 1:21 PM
To: blparent at nfbnet.org
Subject: Re: [blparent] blparent Digest, Vol 92, Issue 35

Hi, Nikki.

I agree with Veronica here. Now granted, my daughter isn't six yet,
but I was around my stepdaughter a lot when she was six, seven and
eight. I suspect Veronica's got good advice about attending your son's
class and trying to see what might be going on. If there's a counselor
at school you and your son could go to, that might also be a good
idea. In order to listen to you, he needs to know that you're
basically a calm but firm parent, not one who just loses control,
calls him a brat and wants to spank him or wash his mouth out. (Maybe
you were just letting steam off on the list). Anyway, if you're angry
and losing control, he'll probably be angry too.

A thought about punishment: What about leaving all his toys in the
room and taking them away or giving them back as his card colors get
worse or better. Maybe starting from a positive place rather than a
negative one might help him to see that if he's good, you're perfectly
happy to let him have all his toys, but that bad behavior will mean
removal of a toy.

Jen

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