[blparent] The maid wants to go on strike!

Wed Jun 6 17:25:53 UTC 2012

Nice idea with the cups and can.

The boy is trainable you just need to make him feel the pain.
Thing is these are life skills he's learning. You need food, and you need clean dishes to eat that food with.  Not serving him the next meal makes logical sense. You can calmly explain to him that since he didn't care enough to wash the dishes, then he must not care about dinner and why fix food for someone who can't be bothered to enjoy it?

-----Original Message-----
From: blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org [mailto:blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org] On Behalf Of Jo Elizabeth Pinto
Sent: Wednesday, June 06, 2012 1:19 PM
To: Blind Parents Mailing List
Subject: Re: [blparent] The maid wants to go on strike!

Little pizzas might be a good idea.  The dishes thing is interesting--I did
stop him from leaving half full drinks sitting around where they could be,
and were often, knocked over.  I said if I had to clean up one more spill I
was going to take all the cups and glasses out of the kitchen and leave only
sippies.  I would have done it, too, but so far I haven't had to.  Also, I
have an empty Pringles can in my utensil drawer, and all of the steak knives
go into that can so I don't reach into the drawer and grab one of the blades
by accident.  I did take all of the knives and put them in a hiding place,
and when I returned them to the drawer, I haven't had any more trouble with
the blades not going into the Pringles can.

Jo Elizabeth

"A bird doesn't sing because it has an answer, it sings because it has a
song."  Maya Angelou

--------------------------------------------------
From: "Pickrell, Rebecca M (TASC)" <REBECCA.PICKRELL at tasc.com>
Sent: Wednesday, June 06, 2012 11:04 AM
To: "'Blind Parents Mailing List'" <blparent at nfbnet.org>
Subject: Re: [blparent] The maid wants to go on strike!

>        To put a more positive spin on this, maybe his mom enjoys waiting
> on him or maybe she's got some control issues and he's gotten yelled at
> for not doing things exactly as she would do them?
>
> Not that you need to put up with this, but you may not know what went on
> or goes on when he's with his mom.
> If he was living with me, I'd first tell him what I expect. Then if he
> ignored me, I'd make him feel the pain.  If dishes don't go where they
> need to, well, he must not care so he doesn't get a place set at the next
> meal because that requires clean dishes.  If his clothes are everywhere,
> well he must not need them clean.
>
> Also, I'd probably have made Sarah a nonpizza lunch and explained to her
> that you're trying to train her silly stepbrother.  I say this because
> he's just figured out that if Sarah wants something you'll do it.  That's
> not technically fair to Sarah but it also isn't fair that you fee like the
> maid and all of you need to realize you live as a group.
>
> If you just can't say no to pizza, can you get little pizzas, only big
> enough for one so Sarah can have hers and stepson can go without?
>
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org [mailto:blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org] On
> Behalf Of Jo Elizabeth Pinto
> Sent: Tuesday, June 05, 2012 5:12 PM
> To: NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List
> Subject: [blparent] The maid wants to go on strike!
>
> Hi.  Summer vacation is just beginning around here, and my stepson is
> living with us during the weeks and going home to his mom on the weekends.
> It's a workable arrangement, except for one thing.  I think my stepson is
> used to his mom pretty much waiting on him.  Like today, he wanted a
> frozen pizza for lunch, but he made no move to get up and make it.  I
> finally did the job because Sarah wanted some too.  He doesn't put dishes
> in the dishwasher, or if he does, they're not rinsed first.  He doesn't
> see a problem with clothes all over the floor.  The maid wants to go on
> strike!
>
> Any tips for how to deal with older kids?  Sarah's young enough that she
> pretty much does what I tell her, and she already knows she has to put
> dishes in the sink and clothes in the hamper.  But my stepson is driving
> me crazy, and I just don't have the energy to keep my house from getting
> to look like Hurricane Katrina has taken up residence.
>
> Run ragged,
> Jo Elizabeth
>
> "A bird doesn't sing because it has an answer, it sings because it has a
> song."  Maya Angelou
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