[blparent] when children get hurt

Wed May 30 00:25:40 UTC 2012

How awful!  Hands on Tummies is going to happen with us from now on, just in 
case.  I had no idea a little hand could get caught, I thought the doors 
would open up again by themselves if they contacted anything.

Jo Elizabeth

"A bird doesn't sing because it has an answer, it sings because it has a 
song."  Maya Angelou

--------------------------------------------------
From: "Erin Rumer" <erinrumer at gmail.com>
Sent: Tuesday, May 29, 2012 6:22 PM
To: "'Blind Parents Mailing List'" <blparent at nfbnet.org>
Subject: Re: [blparent] when children get hurt

> Gosh, we just went through our son getting his hand stuck in the elevator
> door last night and it was horrifying for him and us.  Thankfully, he did
> stop crying after a minute or so and his fingers were just bruised but 
> it's
> a miracle that huge metal door didn't bust his hand.  These little guys 
> are
> so quick and even though I was right there holding his hand, he through 
> his
> other hand out at the last second and there went his hand.  After that, we
> are now playing a game when boarding and unboarding the elevator called,
> "hands on tummies" where my son puts his free hand on his tummy so to
> hopefully prevent this from happening again.
>
> Erin
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org [mailto:blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org] On
> Behalf Of Lisamaria Martinez
> Sent: Tuesday, May 29, 2012 4:10 PM
> To: Blind Parents Mailing List
> Subject: Re: [blparent] when children get hurt
>
> Great question. I've wondered the same thing now that Erik is walking,
> running, climbing and totally being a toddler. He falls a lot and crashes
> into things a lot. He has already gotten so many bruises, scrapes, bumps 
> and
> marks on his arms, legs, face and head.
>
> Even though he pushes my hands away I try very hard to calm him down and
> tell him that he should get over it. I say it jokingly and try to distract
> him from the pain. I hold him and try to check him out for injuries after 
> he
> calms down. I try looking in areas I think he might be hurt based on what 
> he
> is doing.
>
> A month or two ago he was at my job and was so excited to be standing up 
> in
> the elevator on his own that when the doors opened he rushed out. He put 
> his
> forearms on the door, at least I think he did, and as the doors opened he
> got his entire forearm stuck in the door frame of the elevator.
>
> He screamed and cried and I soothed him. He had big fat tears and
> everything. I thought it was his arm, and my coworkers checked out his arm
> after I did and found a little red mark. It wasn't until I got home that
> night and put him to bed that I noticed the last three fingers of his hand
> were puffy and bruised. He didn't seem to have pain anymore and stopped
> crying after a few minutes. so ... the end.
>
> I think the one big thing to remember is that even sighted care givers 
> don't
> always know where the hurt is. Joe, and Erik's daycare provider, have both
> seen Erik fall and injure himself and can't always tell what hurts. Or, 
> they
> see a bump later and have no clue how he hurt himself.
> Just stay cool and calm. My mom ran a home daycare and I noticed that if 
> you
> reacted, the kid would react too.
>
> Hope that helps.
>
> On 5/29/12, Ronit Ovadia Mazzoni <rovadia82 at gmail.com> wrote:
>> Hi Jo Elizabeth,
>> My son is only 13 months old. Your tips are helpful, although I think
>> my son's personality is much more dramatic than your daughter's. :)
>> Even when I know he has not hurt himself badly he will scream and I
>> always calmly tell him he's ok and that it's no big deal, etc etc but
>> it never helps him calm down. We call him a "drama king." :) I think
>> that must be part of my worry, because when he is crying and screaming
>> like crazy, it could be for something very little or for something
>> much more serious and he would react the same.
>> Thanks for your tips.
>> Ronit
>>
>> On May 29, 2012, at 1:58 PM, Jo Elizabeth Pinto wrote:
>>
>>> Hi, Ronit.  How old is your son?
>>>
>>> One of the things I've done, which has seemed shocking to some people
>>> till I explain it, is that I've discouraged the hysterical crying and
>>> flailing that sometimes happens when a child gets hurt.  I've sat
>>> down with my daughter and held her on my lap so she couldn't flop
>>> around and wave her arms.  Then I've insisted that she take slow,
>>> deep breaths.  I did this even when she was less than two years old,
>>> so that after a while it became almost automatic for her to calm
>>> down.  Then, when she was old enough to talk, if she wasn't bleeding
>>> when I inspected her, I'd always say, "No blood, no foul."  Like in
>>> basketball.  After a while, she started saying it herself. And the
>>> few times that she has been bleeding, she has showed me, and said,
> "There's blood this time, Mommy!"
>>>
>>> A month or two ago, Sarah and I were in Sam's Club with her dad, and
>>> she was standing on the front of the shopping cart.  Yes, yes,
>>> dangerous, I know, we talked about that in another thread.  Anywayy,
>>> she fell, and the cashier and the door greeter gasped, thinking she
>>> was going to start wailing.  She got up, dusted herself off, and said,
> "No blood, no foul."
>>> They were very surprised.
>>>
>>> I think overall, my approach has taught Sarah that hurting herself
>>> isn't something to be terrified of.  Some in my family have
>>> complained that I didn't allow Sarah to express her emotions in the
>>> moment.  Maybe I didn't, but I believe fear feeds fear, and calm
>>> feeds calm.  I figured I needed calm so I could inspect for injuries,
>>> or, as Sarah has gotten older, let her show me where she's hurt.
>>> I've seen other kids who get a small scratch or bump, and scream and
>>> cry like they're being drawn and quartered, and I've been glad I
>>> showed Sarah another way to handle things.
>>>
>>> I hope this helps.
>>>
>>> Jo Elizabeth
>>>
>>> "A bird doesn't sing because it has an answer, it sings because it
>>> has a song."  Maya Angelou
>>>
>>> --------------------------------------------------
>>> From: "Ronit Ovadia Mazzoni" <rovadia82 at gmail.com>
>>> Sent: Tuesday, May 29, 2012 2:41 PM
>>> To: "Blind Parents Mailing List" <blparent at nfbnet.org>
>>> Subject: [blparent] when children get hurt
>>>
>>>> Hi list,
>>>> I have a question which may seem silly to many of you but I would
>>>> appreciate any tips you may have. Whenever Alex falls down or gets
>>>> hurt somehow and I am not right there to see what happened, I am
>>>> having a hard time knowing how he hurt himself and the severity of
>>>> the injury. I know this will be happening more once he learns to
>>>> walk and I'd love your ideas on how to handle this. Whenever I know
>>>> he has hurt himself, I always inspect as best I can with my hands to 
>>>> see
> if I feel any blood.
>>>> Often times, however, he doesn't let me check him out thoroughly
>>>> because he is crying and he pushes my hands away. HE is not old
>>>> enough to tell me what hurts. We had an incident at the park a few
>>>> weeks ago when he cut his lip on a wooden rocking horse and luckily
>>>> my husband was there to help figure out how bad it was and to put
>>>> water on it etc, but I am terrified that he will get more seriously
>>>> hurt when I am by myself and I may not know what he hurt and how bad it
> is. What have you all done?
>>>>
>>>> Thanks in advance for your comments.
>>>> Ronit
>>>>
>>>>
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>>
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