[blparent] how to handle a baby while you multi task

[Pickrell, Rebecca M (TASC)]

Hena,
We all make rookie mistakes. I don't judge you for that. What does concern me is that you didn't mention how your baby is doing after the fall. You just said "it was a mistake" and that sighted people would blame you.  They probably won't, but what will give everybody pause is your lack of detachment and your priorities being in the wrong place.
What did your husband say about the fall?

-----Original Message-----
From: blparent [mailto:blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org] On Behalf Of hina altaf
Sent: Wednesday, November 14, 2012 3:46 PM
To: Blind Parents Mailing List
Subject: Re: [blparent] how to handle a baby while you multi task

and also I do not like the car seats because my baby does not like to
sit in them during the time we are at home and would like to move
around and explore. yesterday my husband put him in the car seat and
left. he asked me to watch him but I had to take care of something I
was cooking and the baby fell on the hard wood floor. Then you know,
the sighted people blame that it is the blind parent's fault. yes, I
should have strapped him in, but we all make mistakes.
hina.

On 11/14/12, hina altaf <hinaaltaf1983 at gmail.com> wrote:
> hi everyone,
> Thanks for the advise on how to handle the baby. I liked your options
> about a rug,  play pen, swing and jumping seat but these are things I
> wish I could afford. My husband has other responsibilities as well and
> he helps alot with the baby when I am at work. I am not a citizen, so
> I can't afford the day care and i do not prefer to keep my child in
> day care but when you are the only person running the household
> financially, you have no choice but to work.
> But I appreciate the suggestions in regards to handling the baby and
> will see if I could get any of these items. but if anyone has any of
> these things that they are no longer using them, I would appreciate
> them.
> Thanks.
> Hina.
>
> On 11/14/12, Bernadetta <bernadetta_pracon at samobile.net> wrote:
>> Rebecca,
>> Woe, aren't you overstepping the line here a little? Don't answer that;
>> I don't think you'll agree that you are.
>> But unless you know hina and hina's situation on a more personal level
>> than the rest of us, who are you to make assumptions on her
>> relationship with her husband? While you may have one valid point, that
>> parents might find that spending time together with their baby is more
>> enjoyable than separately, you went ahead and made a bunch of comments
>> about being miserable, about separation, etc.
>> Correct me if I'm wrong here, but Hina asked us for suggestions on how
>> to handle her child when she needs to multitask. She didnt' ask for a
>> marriage councelor. There's no reason to be sticking one's nose into
>> someone else's marital life when they haven't asked anyone to do so.
>> Perhaps you think you're being helpful, but in case you haven't
>> considered this, not everyone can afford to have one parent stay at
>> home from work. Also, not everyone can afford to invest in daycare. In
>> this case, both parents have to work alternating schedules, and there
>> may be no way around it. Some people don't have certain luxuries, no
>> matter how much they can benefit from them.
>> So unless you know something I dont' know, let's not pit a new mother
>> against her husband and tell her what she should and shouldn't do about
>> her marriage and lifestyle. Let's instead support her as a parent and
>> if she asks us for advice on her relationships and how her free time
>> should be spent, then we can perhaps dispense that sort of advice.
>> My partner and I are lucky enough to both work from home, and so we do
>> have that cherrished time with our baby together, but even partners who
>> are both with the baby constantly have to alternate responsibilities.
>> Sometimes I feel like we're doing shifts and we both have two other
>> jobs in conjunction with our paying jobs; Our home and our baby. Often
>> we can enjoy time together as a family, but sometimes our household
>> runs more eficiently and smoothly when we take turns.
>> So it's nice that you have this wonderfully idealistic view of how co
>> parenting should work, but as we all know, being a parent is a tough
>> job. And while we're on the topic of tough jobs, a marriage wouldn't be
>> a genuine partnership without a few tough times now and then. Anyone
>> who feels they might disagree with me, please feel free to do so, but
>> every relationship, no matter how good it is, is a work in progress.
>> Even the best of them have occasional kinks.
>> Again, as I said previously, the nature of your last message suggests
>> that you know more about hina's situation than the rest of us do. If
>> that's true, then that's nice of you to offer her advice, but  if
>> you're just assuming, well... you know the old saying. when you assume,
>> you make an ass out of you and me.
>> Had to put my two cents worth in.
>> Rant over now.
>> And I sincerely hope we haven't scared Hina off with our tendencies to
>> get too personal on here.
>>
>> Bernadetta
>>
>> _______________________________________________
>> blparent mailing list
>> blparent at nfbnet.org
>> http://nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
>> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
>> blparent:
>> http://nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/hinaaltaf1983%40gmail.com
>>
>

_______________________________________________
blparent mailing list
blparent at nfbnet.org
http://nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for blparent:
http://nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/rebecca.pickrell%40tasc.com
CONFIDENTIALITY NOTICE: This message and any attachments or files transmitted with it (collectively, the "Message") are intended only for the addressee and may contain information that is privileged, proprietary and/or prohibited from disclosure by law or contract. If you are not the intended recipient: (a) please do not read, copy or retransmit the Message; (b) permanently delete and/or destroy all electronic and hard copies of the Message; (c) notify us by return email; and (d) you are hereby notified that any dissemination, distribution or copying of the Message is strictly prohibited.