[blparent] Therapist seeking help

[Bridgit Pollpeter]

	`Peggy,

First, I applaud you for having such an open mind and progressive view.
Blindness certainly can create unique challenges in life, but in my
experience, there's a way to meet these challenges.

When discussing disability, I encourage people to not look at it as a
negative but a positive. Instead of thinking one is limited and focusing
on what you think you can not do, consider a different way in which to
accomplish something. Many people with disabilities have discovered
different ways in which to manage life. I don't believe in limitations,
but I believe new ways can be created to allow people with disabilities
to truly be equal in society.

My husband and I are both blind. We have a three-year-old and a newborn,
two-month-old baby. My husband and I both have college degrees and are
pursuing masters, Ross in computer science and I'm pursuing an MFA in
creative writing. My husband works full-time. We live on our own in our
new house. My biggest problem right now with the kids is making sure
clothes are organized properly so they don't leave the house mismatched,
grin. When considering the scope of parenting, this is a very minor
issue.

Our son has an implanted feeding tube as he had a delay in oral eating,
so though he can consume food orally, it's only so much at a time; hence
the feeding tube. A button is on his tummy. Tubing attaches to this
button, and his food is delivered via a pump. What he can not bottle, we
deliver through the pump. We worked with hospital staff to make sure we
were able to independently manage this, and we have been able too. We
are home now, independently using this pump and feeding our son. This
certainly was a unique situation that Ross and I had to navigate, making
sure others were confident in our ability, and that we could in deed
operate this pump. We were very blessed as we had a team of doctors,
nurses and educators who didn't doubt our ability to parent. No qualms
were present as we prepared to leave the NICU and bring our son home.

I also am type one diabetic, and I have been diabetic for almost 30
years. I didn't lose my vision until I was 22, and it wasn't from my
diabetes, but I have independently managed my diabetes even after losing
sight. I have never found this overly difficult though inconvenient at
times.

The Federation is a great resource, and in fact, there's a booklet
addressing this very issue you bring up. I always forget the name of it,
but I'm sure others have already mentioned it.

If you need answers to specific questions, this is the place to be, and
I, along with many others, are more than willing to assist and provide
any answers, material and resources you need.

Sincerely,
Bridgit Kuenning-Pollpeter
Read my blog at:
http://blogs.livewellnebraska.com/author/bpollpeter/
 
"History is not what happened; history is what was written down."
The Expected One- Kathleen McGowan

Message: 1
Date: Tue, 30 Oct 2012 17:11:42 +0000
From: Peggy Taylor <ptaylor at tfifamily.org>
To: "blparent at nfbnet.org" <blparent at nfbnet.org>
Subject: [blparent] Therapist seeking help
Message-ID:
	
<F557C33D6979064198E8FE184AF90456AAECB686 at KSTOPVS-EX1.Agency.local>
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I am a family therapist working with a father with limited vision.  His
son is in foster care because of issues related to the mother's care of
the boy.  The father has not been an active parent because of the
relationship with the mother.   He is hoping to have his son
reintegrated into his home.

The first case manager involved with the family dismissed him as a
primary caretaker for the child.  Fortunately, the current case manager
is open to this outcome.   My concern is that other parties involved in
deciding on reintegration for this family may not see him as a viable
parent.  I hope to be prepared to counter that skepticism with  solid
information to the contrary.

I joined your list serve in the hope that you will share information
about the strengths of blind parents and about how blind parents are
able to effectively parent their children.  I know this happens
regularly as a close friend in grade school was the daughter of two
blind parents and their home was one of my favorite hang outs.  But I
would like to have more than  my anecdotal experience to counter any
resistance this father may face from uninformed skeptics.

I really appreciate any help you can offer!!

Thanks!

Peggy