[blparent] New Parent Introduction

[Jo Elizabeth Pinto]

I agree wholeheartedly with Bernadetta about the birth plan.  It's important 
to educate yourself and write down your ideal wishes so the doctors and 
nurses will know how you would like everything to go.  But try not to be 
disappointed or down on yourself if your birth doesn't go as expected.  I 
was adamant that I wanted to deliver naturally, no drugs, and immediate 
breastfeeding after birth.  But I ended up having an urgent C-section after 
about twenty-one hours of labor because my daughter got her head turned in 
an awkward position and never would have made it out that way.  Still, my 
daughter was born with only some minor complications, an that was what 
really mattered.

During the birthing classes, the nurse who was teaching us gave us each ten 
cards.  The following things were written on each card:

C-section
Forceps
boy or girl
healthy baby
suction during delivery
breaking the waters
fetal monitor during delivery
epidural
episiotomy
IV during labor

She asked each of us to turn over four cards, signifying things we could be 
flexible about as we made up our birth plans.  Then we turned over two more 
cards, signifying things that would be harder to give way on.  After that, 
we turned over two more cards.  I'll never forget it; when we were done with 
the activity, the nurse said, "If all of you don't still have 'healthy baby' 
face up, I don't even want to hear about it."

Anyway, I wish you all the best during your pregnancy.  Enjoy it as much as 
you can.  At no other time in your life will naps be all but prescribed. 
*Smile.*

Jo Elizabeth

Truth is tough. It will not break, like a bubble, at a touch; nay, you may 
kick it about all day like a football, and it will be round and full at 
evening.--Oliver Wendell Holmes, Sr.
-----Original Message----- 
From: Bernadetta Pracon
Sent: Wednesday, September 19, 2012 4:44 PM
To: blparent at nfbnet.org
Subject: Re: [blparent] New Parent Introduction

Hi tracy
How exciting!! Congratulations on your pregnancy and of course, welcome
to the list. My name is Bernadetta and I am a mommy of a little guy who
just turned seven months today. Do you know what you're having?
It looks like you're covering all your bases during your pregnancy and
that you're becoming well aware of what to expect both during birth and
afterword. Please feel free to come to this list with any concerns or
questions you might have, or just to share and update us. We have a
diverse bunch of parents here, with all kinds of oppinions and
parenting styles, and everyone is always eager to help.
I had a guide dog, Kipp for years, but I ended up having to retire him
during my pregnancy due to the fact that he developed oral cancer. He
still lives with us, so I understand where you're coming from regarding
the introduction of your baby to your dog. We also have my boyfriend's
dog (my boyfriend and I are both totally blind) who is still working.
We chose not to bring either dog to the hospital because we decided it
would be too chaotic an environment for everyone. I know you'd think it
might be great to bring yorr pup into the delivery room with you to
witness your little one's birth, but I'm pretty confident that your dog
would rather not be there  herself. (smile). The doctors and nurses
might also become a little flustered, and there's no need to add any
more frustration into an already high-energy situation. You also have
to consider the possibility in which you might have to have a CSection.
I say this because I was ademant about giving birth naturally, but I
ended up having to undergo an emergency CSection, because I wasn't
dialated enough to give birth and my son's heart rate  was decreasing.
Ultimately, it's best to give birth naturally, but when it comes to the
safe delivery of your child, you throw all the ideals aside and do what
a good mom does: You go for what's best for your little one.
In any event, I doubt they'd let you bring your guide into the
opperating room, regardless of the discrimination laws. Doctors are
firm on keeping things steril--They usually want one person, and one
person only with you in the opperating room, and they wouldn't have
much of a problem firmly insisting that your dog cannot be there. And
with an impending CSection that has to happen in  as short a time as
possible in some situations, it's really best not to argue.
I read in another email that you have a birthing plan set up. Birthing
plans are great--they're a great precaution but please dont' be
disappointed if things don't go according to your plan. I had one of
those too, and everything that could go differently did. I developed
preeclampsia the last week of my pregnancy and had to be induced, and
while I wanted to give birth naturally, as I said, that just couldn't 
happen.
You shouldn't have an issue with people doubting yrou abilities as a
blind parent as long as you're patient with answering questions as well
as asking them. You're a new parent, so don't hesitate to ask for help
from Maternity ward nurses and doctors alike--They would rather you
seek a little help here and there instead of playing the "I'm blind but
very very independent" card. That's what makes people nervous, when a
person insists on no help at all. Because blind or sighted, a new
parent needs some help at least. You might run into a lemon here and
there--For us, it was a social worker who was rude, ignorant and
assumed things rather than educating herself. She asked us some
questions about bathing, changing and feeding our child, as well as how
we'd know if we were dealing with a sick baby--her tone made us a bit
nervous, but ultimately, there were people who were confident in our
abilities, who vouched for our becoming capable new parents.
Besides, you mentioned that your fiance is sighted, so that should
relieve some of the ignorant ones who assume that you as a blind mom
won't be able to handle your child. That's not right, but it's probable
in some cases--You don't have to prove as much to the skeptics.
All in all, have fun during your pregnancy, enjoy it as much as
possible, and take it easy. Make sure to rest as much as you can--make
it into a vacation, because once Baby comes, it's a nonstop marathon of
changing, feeding and little snags of restless sleep here and there.

Good luck and please keep us posted.

Bernadetta

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