[blparent] Please, Please Read: Parenting Questions the Court Will Want Me To Answer:Any Advice?

[melissa R green]

Have you been in touch with the nfb chapter or the state affilliate?
this way you can get more blind parents to help you and answer these 
questions.
I know here in colorado a few weeks ago the nfb had to step in and have a 
meeting to help a blind couple keep their child.
The father said to me, I can't believe that this is still happening.  I said 
that its happening everyday.
Good luck, and I hope I have been some help.
Blessings,
Sincerely,
Melissa and Pj
Find me on:
Twitter melissa5674
facebook Melissa R Green
Linkedin www.linkedin.com/in/melissagreen5674



----- Original Message ----- 
From: "Si" <sieradream at gmail.com>
To: "Blind Parents Mailing List" <blparent at nfbnet.org>
Sent: Friday, April 19, 2013 4:27 PM
Subject: [blparent] Please,Please Read: Parenting Questions the Court Will 
Want Me To Answer:Any Advice?


Hey everyone, it's Si. I've been on digest mode for awhile now and have been 
pretty out of the loop. So if any of the following questions have already 
been answered, please, please bear with me.

A Little About My Situation:

As some of you may remember, I had a little girl in December. Ayla Rose. 
(Side Note: Breast feeding was finally worked out and we're seasoned pros at 
it now.)

Anyway, I'll cut to the chase. Her father is fighting me for primary 
custody. We were never married or anything like that, so that particular 
stresser isn't a factor. He lives out of state, which is why shared custody 
won't work.

He's basing my quote-unquote "incompetence" largely on the fact that I am 
blind.

This leads me to the following questions. I have ideas for answers, but I'd 
like all the advice and suggestions you all can give me from your personal 
experience. My lawyer wants me to gather all the ammo I can with these 
questions, not because I'm incompetent. I have professionals working with me 
who can vouch for that. But because I want to have all these answers ready 
when the "How will you do this?" questions come flying at me in the upcoming 
depositions. Which are the 29th, so any advice before then will be really, 
really, really appreciated.

Questions:

I'll put down the question, then I'll put down my own answers so you guys 
know what I'm thinking. Please feel free to add to my answers with any and 
all advice.

Please forgive me if these come off as biased. I'm blind too, so I mean no 
insult. I know our safety precautions are much the same as those of sighted 
parents, but let's face it, some things are different and those are the 
things I need to focus on.

Q: What were some of the blindness-related safety precautions you took when 
your little one began to crawl / walk?

A: When Ayla begins to be mobile, I plan on attaching bells to her shoes and 
clothing. I also plan on attaching a child locater to her so that if I don't 
hear her moving, I can hit a button and locate her.

I have also started to baby proof my home like any other sighted parent.

I don't keep dangerous objects on a level which she can get to.

I don't have a lot of extra items such as knick-knacks, lamps, end tables, 
etc that she can grab hold of and pull down on herself.

I search the floor on my hands and knees for any small objects that may have 
fallen and that could provide a choking hazard.

Q: How did you teach your child his or her colors?
This is another reason he's claiming I'm unfit. He claims I won't be able to 
teach Ayla her colors.

A: Seedlings provides many print-braille books that have both a picture of a 
specific color or object that bears the color and the braille captioning so 
that I will know what object and color is being shown. I can teach Ayla her 
colors with the following:
Seedlings color books
Real life objects such as a red tomato, yellow banana, orange carrot or 
green apple.

I can purchase toys such as plastic fruit, plastic blocks, etc and label the 
different colors in braille.

I can create a fabric color book that will not only teach her texture, but 
colors as well. This book can also be labeled in braille.

How did you teach your child that pointing at objects and saying "What's 
that?" don't work for you?
This question is something specific the father wrote down. He feels it's 
detremental to Ayla for me to raise her because when she points at something 
and says "What's that?" I won't be able to answer.

A: Children know what they are taught. They also mimick what they observe. 
As she grows, Ayla will observe that pointing at objects holds no meaning 
for me. Even now, when I talk to her and teach her what objects are, I put 
my hand on the object, say the name, then put her hand on the object and 
repeat its name. This will teach her that in order to show mommy something, 
I need to be touching it.

Granted, I know this won't work for absolutely everything, so any 
suggestions here will really, really help.

Q: How do you know when the baby has a bruise or abbrasion? How do you treat 
the area without being able to see it?

Q: How would you respond in an emergency?

A: Same as anyone else. 911 then CPR or whatever a first aid class says to 
do. I'll be registering for one shortly.

Q: Are there any special devices or adaptive technology you use to make 
caring for your child easier? If you guys can provide any links, that would 
be so awesome.

Q: How do you measure your child's liquid medicine when they are ill?

A: I have a standard syringe that has been marked in both CC's as well as 
teaspoons. Any other methods would be appreciated though.

This is all I can think of for now. If I didn't address anything and you 
guys think it's important, please let me know. I'm open to any and all 
advice.

Yours,
Si
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