[blparent] update on our lives.

Gabe Vega theblindtech at gmail.com
Thu Jan 31 20:44:08 UTC 2013 

I'm sorry, Uncle Steve, I really am. taking my employment in to consideration, I should keep myself in better behavior. again, I apologize and I should not act that way. Can I make a donation to the NFB and we can forget all this happened?
Gabe Vega
CEO
Commtech LLC
Web: http://commtechusa.net
FaceBook: http://facebook.com/commtechllc
Twitter: http://twitter.com/commtechllc
Email: info at commtechusa.net
Phone: (623) 565-9357

On Jan 31, 2013, at 1:30 PM, "Steve Jacobson" <steve.jacobson at visi.com> wrote:

> Gabe and all,
> 
> You've already apologized, but clearly this thread has nothing to do with blind parenting.  Your implication that it is either SSI 
> or work is also incorrect.  It isn't your job to determine if another list member is misrepresenting themselves, but if you are 
> concerned that they are doing something that might be inappropriate, write to Dave or me.  If you are smart enough to run your own 
> business, you should not need Dave or me to point out when you are no longer talking about parenting issues but we go through this 
> over and over again.  If you can't help yourself, try unplugging your keyboard for a few hours.  
> 
> Some of the others here are also doing nothing to try to calm things down.  If it is personal, take it up with the person off 
> list.  If you think something is off topic, write to Dave or me.  I didn't look at this list for three hours and things blow up.  
> I am able to trust my teenagers alone for longer than that.  Let's knock this off and attempt, if possible, to limit discussions 
> to blind parenting.  There is a reason this list has that title.  It isn't meant to be a place where blind parents emulate the 
> less desireable bahaviors of kids. 
> 
> On Thu, 31 Jan 2013 12:17:53 -0700, Gabe Vega wrote:
> 
>> now lets be honest here dear, you don't work.
>> Gabe Vega
>> CEO
>> Commtech LLC
>> Web: http://commtechusa.net
>> FaceBook: http://facebook.com/commtechllc
>> Twitter: http://twitter.com/commtechllc
>> Email: info at commtechusa.net
>> Phone: (623) 565-9357
> 
>> On Jan 31, 2013, at 12:13 PM, "Jo Elizabeth Pinto" <jopinto at msn.com> wrote:
> 
>>> Of course not.  That's a stupid comment.  I work and raise my daughter, I've changed plenty of nasty diapers and cleaned up my 
> body weight in barf. Shannon never said she denied her son anything.  She just said it was unsavory, which I'm sure it is.  Most 
> people will deal with body fluids and solids as they have to, but I don't know anybody who likes it.  And you can't say she's 
> complained about every little thing when she hasn't even posted for eons.
>>> 
>>> Jo Elizabeth
>>> 
>>> Truth is tough. It will not break, like a bubble, at a touch; nay, you may kick it about all day like a football, and it will 
> be round and full at evening.--Oliver Wendell Holmes, Sr.
>>> -----Original Message----- From: Gabe Vega
>>> Sent: Thursday, January 31, 2013 11:58 AM
>>> To: Blind Parents Mailing List
>>> Subject: Re: [blparent] update on our lives.
>>> 
>>> not it at all. its just that those of us who live life, while working and raising our kids, some times even as a single parent. 
> don't sit here and complain about the littlest things. there is nothing wrong with changing your own kids no matter how big they 
> get. 2 months or 4 years. if they need changing and they can't do it themselves, who are we as parents to deny them the help? so 
> if your daughter/son, threw up all over you when they had the flue, would you get mad at them? make them clean up their own Barf?
>>> Gabe Vega
>>> CEO
>>> Commtech LLC
>>> Web: http://commtechusa.net
>>> FaceBook: http://facebook.com/commtechllc
>>> Twitter: http://twitter.com/commtechllc
>>> Email: info at commtechusa.net
>>> Phone: (623) 565-9357
>>> 
>>> On Jan 31, 2013, at 11:35 AM, "Dianna Alley" <dianna24 at earthlink.net> wrote:
>>> 
>>>> Well it is disgusting I mean we love our kids but as they get older it gets harder to change and nastier that does not mean 
> she has an issue with her child or his body.  He should be trained by now accept for maybe an accident or two.  I think some of 
> you all just like to find issue with people.
>>>> ----- Original Message ----- From: "Gabe Vega" <theblindtech at gmail.com>
>>>> To: "Blind Parents Mailing List" <blparent at nfbnet.org>
>>>> Sent: Thursday, January 31, 2013 12:19 PM
>>>> Subject: Re: [blparent] update on our lives.
>>>> 
>>>> 
>>>>> I'll be honest, I kind of scratched my head in wonder about that statement as well, about her not liking changing her son. 
> yes, I understand he's big, and yes I understand the potential underlining issues, but, just weird to here a mother say that. 
> thats all.
>>>>> Gabe Vega
>>>>> CEO
>>>>> Commtech LLC
>>>>> Web: http://commtechusa.net
>>>>> FaceBook: http://facebook.com/commtechllc
>>>>> Twitter: http://twitter.com/commtechllc
>>>>> Email: info at commtechusa.net
>>>>> Phone: (623) 565-9357
>>>>> 
>>>>> On Jan 31, 2013, at 8:09 AM, "Pickrell, Rebecca M (TASC)" <REBECCA.PICKRELL at tasc.com> wrote:
>>>>> 
>>>>>> Shannon,
>>>>>> I'm concerned when you say you are disgusted by your son's diapers. You're his mother and of all people his body shouldn't 
> disgust you.
>>>>>> I get that you wish he'd be potty trained already.  I get that he's probably produced some nasty poops. What I don't get is 
> continual disgust. I would understand if you said "Wow that diaper sure was gross" or "that poop should go into the toxic waste 
> disposal system" but not continual disgust.
>>>>>> 
>>>>>> I'm wondering if some of your disgust is due to other issues, or if you haven't learned techniques to deal with his diapers 
> effectively.  You say your vision is very limited. I'm wondering if you thought "My kid will be out of diapers, I don't need to 
> even think about how to change a diaper and not see while I do it".
>>>>>> You have many other issues in your post. Your sitter needs to go if she's not behaving appropriately. Don't excuse her 
> behavior.  Your son will learn boundaries, though his boundaries may not be boundaries you like. That's ok, he's his own person. 
> Convey to him that he can always tell somebody to stop what they are doing, and that you will always have his back.   You won't 
> convey this if you view his body as a disgusting thing that you shouldn't have to deal with.
>>>>>> 
>>>>>> -----Original Message-----
>>>>>> From: blparent [mailto:blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org] On Behalf Of Jennifer Jackson
>>>>>> Sent: Wednesday, January 30, 2013 12:10 AM
>>>>>> To: 'Blind Parents Mailing List'
>>>>>> Subject: Re: [blparent] update on our lives.
>>>>>> 
>>>>>> I think it is time to get a doctor involved. The toileting thing by itself
>>>>>> should be addressed because something is wrong. You can not move forward
>>>>>> with any kind of training or addressing it from an emotional or
>>>>>> psychological stand point until you rule out some kind of physical problem.
>>>>>> 
>>>>>> Please also talk to your doctor about getting a developmental evaluation for
>>>>>> your son. I know my youngest son's audiologist has been using the blocks in
>>>>>> the bucket with his testing since he was about two. I do not want to worry
>>>>>> you, but you should move forward on this right away. Developmental problems
>>>>>> are most easy to address with younger children.
>>>>>> 
>>>>>> I do have a thought on making living with the current toileting situation
>>>>>> easier to live with though. Perhaps you could routinely spend some time with
>>>>>> him just sitting on the toilet several times a day. Maybe singing or
>>>>>> listening to music to entertain him? If he goes in the toilet that is an
>>>>>> extra blessing because it is one less mess for someone else to clean up. A
>>>>>> little time learning to relax on the toilet may also encourage him to
>>>>>> physically relax and be able to go. My thought is that whatever the problem
>>>>>> is that is keeping him from becoming trained, this kind of routine will aid
>>>>>> the situation. If you know what time he normally goes in his pull up then
>>>>>> try to do this around that same time with the idea of perhaps preventing
>>>>>> having to clean it yourself.
>>>>>> 
>>>>>> 
>>>>>> Jennifer
>>>>>> 
>>>>>> -----Original Message-----
>>>>>> From: blparent [mailto:blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org] On Behalf Of Shannan
>>>>>> Zinck
>>>>>> Sent: Wednesday, January 30, 2013 5:50 PM
>>>>>> To: blparent at nfbnet.org
>>>>>> Subject: [blparent] update on our lives.
>>>>>> 
>>>>>> Hi all, it's been a long time. due to the condition with my eye (which is
>>>>>> still ongoing) I have had to really limit my computer time as I use large
>>>>>> print and not screen readers though if this goes on much longer I may have
>>>>>> to consider that possibility just to keep in touch. Anyway a couple
>>>>>> questions.
>>>>>> 
>>>>>> I'm wondering if anyone has struggled with a much older child with potty
>>>>>> training. Myles just turned 4 yesterday and is still not trained. We
>>>>>> thought originally that he might just be stubborn but, now I'm not so sure.
>>>>>> Though he is strong willed he does listen pretty good to us. He can be
>>>>>> playing along like nothing is happening and all of a sudden he'll tell me
>>>>>> he peed but, that's only when his pullup is full and I mean leaking and
>>>>>> running down his leg full. He can have several pees and not even notice and
>>>>>> same with BM's he doesn't stop for those either. He knows how to use the
>>>>>> toilet and even goes in by himself quite often but, really it's hit and
>>>>>> miss even with a half hourly schedule. He says he can't tell if he needs to
>>>>>> go or not and up until today I didn't believe him but, When he lies he
>>>>>> changes his story constantly so he's easy to catch. He maintains the same
>>>>>> story when it comes to knowing when he needs to go or not and say he
>>>>>> doesn't know. I never know when he's going in his pants and he is a major
>>>>>> people person so is in my space all the time so he is rarely in a different
>>>>>> room then either his father or myself. We've been working on potty training
>>>>>> for over 2 years now and recently even have been making him change his own
>>>>>> pullup when wet. We thought this tactic would encourage him to try harder
>>>>>> but no dice. # 2  he has never tried on the toilet and no future prospect
>>>>>> is in sight for that. I'm beginning to get quite concerned given his age. I
>>>>>> know physically he is a bit behind due to the drugs in his system at birth
>>>>>> but, not enough to cause concern. He always catches up. However at his age
>>>>>> we are getting to the place where babysitters are pretty much impossible to
>>>>>> get because he is huge to begin with and no one wants to change a kid that
>>>>>> age and size. He's 4 like I said and is over 3 feet tall weighing well over
>>>>>> 40lbs. I can't stand changing him and I'm his mom so I can just imagine how
>>>>>> a sitter would feel. When there is a medical issue it's easy to explain it
>>>>>> but, when there's such a gray area to what could be wrong it's not so
>>>>>> simple. I'm just plain discouraged and confused. I'm wondering if it's time
>>>>>> to get a doctor involved or just wait it out and see if the slow
>>>>>> development is the problem. I'd hate to push the issue only to find out
>>>>>> later that there was something wrong but, if it's just laziness on his part
>>>>>> fd hat to let it go. He can't even get involved in group activities yet
>>>>>> because he's not trained, it's down right embarrassing. You know it's funny
>>>>>> that before I had kids of my own I swore I'd never have a child who wasn't
>>>>>> trained by the time they were 2 and now look at us. For all the parents who
>>>>>> struggle with or have struggled with this issue I apologize whole
>>>>>> heartedly. I realize now that you can't choose what life will bring you all
>>>>>> you can do is work through it. Part of this is because with my eye problems
>>>>>> as bad as they have been we decided for a short while to let training go
>>>>>> because I am so limited in what I can do right now but, that lovely issue
>>>>>> has been going on so long almost 2 years now that we can no longer just
>>>>>> leave it alone. This past year has been a strange one for sure.
>>>>>> Also today we discovered that he seems to struggle with putting 2 and 2
>>>>>> together. figuring out simple concepts so we wonder if that has something
>>>>>> to do with potty training as well. We took him for a hearing test and he
>>>>>> can hear fine however when asked to put blocks into a bucket whenever he
>>>>>> heard a beep he couldn't do it for some reason. he wanted to and when I did
>>>>>> it with him he did it fine but, when doing it himself he couldn't. When the
>>>>>> doc asked him if he heard the beeps he said yes but, the blocks never went
>>>>>> into the bucket. He knew he had to put them in the bucket and he knew he
>>>>>> could hear the sounds but, he couldn't put the 2 things together unless
>>>>>> some one was doing it with him which isn't a true test since he was copying
>>>>>> me. Now he has to go back again in a few months. I would have thought at
>>>>>> his age he'd have been able to figure out how the do this. I'm wondering
>>>>>> what kids at his age should know how to do. average kids that is. It's been
>>>>>> a long few months though I finally have a follow up appointment for my eye
>>>>>> and am hoping they will finally tell me when they will get around to
>>>>>> removing it. About the babysitter thing also I'm concerned about privacy.
>>>>>> He is older now and though he is not trained I not so sure about how
>>>>>> comfortable I am with babysitters changing him. Maybe I'm being paranoid
>>>>>> but, he is my son and I want to protect him. We are very careful about who
>>>>>> babysits but, some people have different boundaries then others He's
>>>>>> getting to an age where he needs to understand boundaries and that hard to
>>>>>> do when everyone who looks after him has to change his butt. One of the
>>>>>> only sitters we have due to his age that is willing does things that make
>>>>>> me uncomfortable. She isn't intentionally doing wrong things and nothing
>>>>>> alarming just concerning like the way she tickles him and things like that.
>>>>>> She has little concept of proper boundaries and I'm not sure how to deal
>>>>>> with this. She's the only sitter I've got yet I'm not so sure she's good
>>>>>> for him. Don't get me wrong she not molesting him or anything like that
>>>>>> she's too childlike herself for that but, she is too touchy feely and
>>>>>> clingy for my liking. Just so you are aware I'm a VERY private person
>>>>>> overly so, so some of this could be my own paranoia as well but, I'm having
>>>>>> a hard time discerning this situation. I'm not willing to have my son put
>>>>>> in harms way so I am really stomped on what to do here. I've expressed this
>>>>>> to my husband and he isn't sure what to do either. She is 23 but, seems to
>>>>>> act like a 14 year old. not very mature at all. any ideas sorry for the
>>>>>> book it's been a while. I'll try to keep in touch better.
>>>>>> 
>>>>>> 
>>>>>> --
>>>>>> Shannan Zinck
>>>>>> Survival is letting GOD take over!!!
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>>>>>> 
>>>>>> 
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