[blparent] Introduction and a question
Star Gazer
pickrellrebecca at gmail.com
Wed Feb 17 16:44:09 UTC 2016
She gets paid to be on the list Judy.
Remmber that. Lots of us don't like all aspects of our jobs but we deal with
them. If she is repelled by the list, she needs a new job.
-----Original Message-----
From: BlParent [mailto:blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org] On Behalf Of Judy Jones
via BlParent
Sent: Wednesday, February 17, 2016 9:32 AM
To: Blind Parents Mailing List <blparent at nfbnet.org>
Cc: Judy Jones <Judy.Jones at icbvi.idaho.gov>
Subject: Re: [blparent] Introduction and a question
I hope the professional was not repelled away from the list by some of the
negativity.
I totally get what Rebecca is driving at. I just think we have too little
information.
I know our rehab instructor from our office visits clients all the time
where the other spouse is not involved, but she has to have a release signed
by the client with consent to interact with spouse as well, so not
surprising that this client was the only one mentioned in the adult family
dynamic.
I do agree, though, if anyone does not like posts on the list, to correspond
with the individual off-list and to keep this list a courteous and
informative resource.
Judy
-----Original Message-----
From: BlParent [mailto:blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org] On Behalf Of Star Gazer
via BlParent
Sent: Tuesday, February 16, 2016 4:18 PM
To: 'Blind Parents Mailing List'
Cc: Star Gazer
Subject: Re: [blparent] Introduction and a question
Thank youSteve. This is all I was getting
at. It seemed odd that this lady wasn't on the list herself, and didn't seem
to have any plans to get here.
Also, the professional described her situation as "helping a blind mom and
her toddler" not "a family where the mom is blind".
The approach and advice given is different based on the configuration. It
also works differently if the father is involved but they are not
functioning as a family unit. Say what you all will, the world treats
married families very differently then it treats other configurations. The
professional isn't doing her client any favors by presenting her as a single
mother if she isn't. The advice we and others give will be different and
that needs to be taken into account.
Finally, you do all realize that the professional has not responded adding
more detail. It makes me think I'm not too far off my mark. The fact that
everybody jumped on me means something I said resonated in a way nobody
likes, and that is also worth thinking about. Nobody has to like what I or
anybody says, so why read and respond?
-----Original Message-----
From: BlParent [mailto:blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org] On Behalf Of Steve
Jacobson via BlParent
Sent: Tuesday, February 16, 2016 6:05 PM
To: 'Blind Parents Mailing List' <blparent at nfbnet.org>
Cc: Steve Jacobson <steve.jacobson at visi.com>
Subject: Re: [blparent] Introduction and a question
Everyone,
As the list moderator, please allow me to urge that we try to remember that
all of us come from different backgrounds, not just those who come to the
list as a new member. Notes such as Tammy's below should not go to the
entire list but, if written at all, be directed to the individual to which
the comments were aimed. Generally, you can do a "reply to all" and then
delete the list addresses to get the address of the individual.
Some of us here have had negative experiences where a well-intentioned
professional attempted to play a role in our lives that went beyond the role
that was prescribed. Of course, this does not mean that all professionals
do that, nor does it mean that it is happening in this case. However, our
roles, in my opinion, on this list are twofold. Certainly we need to try to
provide accurate answers to questions that arise. We are a very good
resource for information needed by blind parents. In addition, though, it
seems reasonable to me that we also watch out for our fellow blind parents.
It does not seem unreasonable to me to suggest that this person be
encouraged to seek out information on her own. By the same token, we also
must realize that there could be reasons she cannot connect with us
directly, and that it could be a violation of confidentiality for an
involved professional to share such reasons with the list. It needs also to
be said that if we are asked questions and we do not know all of the facts,
our advice could be incorrect in some cases.
I have to think that a trained professional is going to have the ability to
analyze the information that is provided and also consider whether the
suggestion that the parent be encouraged to contact the list directly is
worth pursuing. Parenting is a challenge, but as much as possible, we need
to be collecting our own information as blind parents, and we need to be
learning how to handle issues that come our way ourselves. Some times we
need help getting to that point, and the professional in this case may
simply be trying to do that. However, not every professional automatically
knows about the kinds of things many of us deal with every day as blind
adults and as blind parents. The experience with blind people that many
professionals have is with blind children or with clients who are learning
to deal with blindness. Therefore, we need to encourage the asking of
questions by list members and by professionals who may come to us for
information. Let's be careful in our communication and consider that a
carefully raised question can create a sense of security that can make this
list even more useful.
Finally, remember that if you have a gripe with someone, take it up with
them off the list. If you think something isn't on topic or appropriate for
the list, then write to me about it, not the whole list. If you forget to
whom you should write, the moderator is listed on the web page for this
list. Let's get back to helping each other.
Best regards,
Steve Jacobson
-----Original Message-----
From: BlParent [mailto:blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org] On Behalf Of Tammy via
BlParent
Sent: Tuesday, February 16, 2016 2:14 PM
To: Blind Parents Mailing List <blparent at nfbnet.org>
Cc: Tammy <tcl189 at rogers.com>
Subject: Re: [blparent] Introduction and a question
Hi,
You're opinion was based on what exactly? She asked for help for her
client, someone we know nothing about aside from the fact that she is a
mother with a toddler. Why is it that most of the time you seem not to be
able to help without being critical? It's not your business whether the
person is paying for services, and it's not your business whether the woman
is in a relationship with the father or whether she got knocked up in a back
alley somewhere and knows nothing about the sperm donor as you call him.
That's neither here nor there at the moment and doesn't concern us unless
Liz or her client brings it up on the list for us to answer questions about
etc. She asked for help re baby and toddler issues. So if you don't have
anything nice or posative to add, please do us all a favour and shut up!
I'm sorry all for the harshness of this post. I will say no more on the
subject unless help is needed. I've made my point and will take my own
advice and shut up now. lol
Thanks,
Tammy
-----Original Message-----
From: Star Gazer via BlParent
Sent: Tuesday, February 16, 2016 1:29 PM
To: 'Blind Parents Mailing List'
Cc: Star Gazer
Subject: Re: [blparent] Introduction and a question
We all have the right to express our oppinions. I think something isn't
right here and I'm going to call it out especially if the personis being
paid to help someone.
-----Original Message-----
From: BlParent [mailto:blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org] On Behalf Of Annely Rose
via BlParent
Sent: Tuesday, February 16, 2016 1:25 PM
To: Blind Parents Mailing List <blparent at nfbnet.org>
Cc: Annely Rose <annely53r at yahoo.com>
Subject: Re: [blparent] Introduction and a question
Thank you Tammy. People make too many assumptions. We don't know whether
or not Elizabeth has told her client about this list. And if she has and
her client is seeing these negative posts, it would be a shame. People
should remember: If you can't say something nice or positive, don't say
anything at all. God bless you all.
Annely
--------------------------------------------
On Tue, 2/16/16, Briley O'Connor via BlParent <blparent at nfbnet.org> wrote:
Subject: Re: [blparent] Introduction and a question
To: "Blind Parents Mailing List" <blparent at nfbnet.org>
Cc: "Briley O'Connor" <brileyoc at gmail.com>
Date: Tuesday, February 16, 2016, 11:57 AM
Hi there!
Baby wearing seems like the
best solution. Encourage her to find a local baby wearing group and find
Baby Wearing International resources very helpful.
Thanks,
Briley
On Feb 14, 2016, at 5:55
PM, Elizabeth Bowden via BlParent <blparent at nfbnet.org>
wrote:
Hello Wendy,
Thanks so much for the encouragement I really hope all that will happen is
well.
Sent from my iPhone
> On Feb 14, 2016, at 4:07 PM, Wendy Meuse via BlParent
> <blparent at nfbnet.org>
wrote:
>
> hi
Elizabeth: I am sure that there are car seats that can fit in strollers.
However I am a grandmother now, and the strollers and > car seat I used
are probably long gone. I found a back pack very useful though. I just
loved mine. I hope you will get some good
> information from folks on this list
that are using or have used more modern strollers and car seats then I had.
Perhaps she would > like to get hold of people on this list to get some
good ideas and to have lots of support.
>
----- Original Message -----
> From:
"Elizabeth Bowden via BlParent" <blparent at nfbnet.org> > To:
<blparent at nfbnet.org> > Cc: "Elizabeth Bowden" <bowdenelizabeth5 at gmail.com>
> Sent: Sunday, February 14, 2016 12:35 PM > Subject: [blparent]
Introduction and a question > > > Hello Little, > My name is Liz
Bowden. I am a blind independen Living instructor instructing the mother
of a toddler. The mother would like to > take her child around in her
community, but will have difficulty with a cane, stroller, and a car seat.
She primarily uses cabs for > her transportation. Do any of you use
anything like a stroller car seat combination for your toddler, and if so,
what make and > model. I have investigated options, and find them
overwhelming. Other solutions for the problem would be welcome.
> Thanks In Advance.
> Sent from my iPhone
>
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