[blparent] (no subject)
Alomi Parikh
alomiparikh24 at gmail.com
Tue May 16 18:18:44 UTC 2017
Yes I think I have concluded that as well.
I am so glad I reached out and got these responses from all of you, it
really widened my views.
Thank you!
On Tue, May 16, 2017 at 7:01 PM, Judy Jones via BlParent <
blparent at nfbnet.org> wrote:
> Blind parents just don't do that many things differently, so if you are
> looking for that premise, it won't work.
>
> Judy
>
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: BlParent [mailto:blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org] On Behalf Of Alomi
> Parikh via BlParent
> Sent: Monday, May 15, 2017 9:45 PM
> To: Blind Parents Mailing List
> Cc: Alomi Parikh
> Subject: Re: [blparent] (no subject)
>
> Hi
>
> Thank you for choosing to reply to my questions
>
> Well I don't do surveys for people usually, but like it or not we do things
> differently sometimes and sometimes it is related to being blind and other
> times it is just what we choose to do as people.
>
> Could you please elaborate on what you do differently based on your
> blindness? If you don't mind that is. It would really help me out a lot.
>
> Thank you
>
> Alomi Parikh
>
>
> On May 16, 2017 6:01 AM, "DiannaAlley via BlParent" <blparent at nfbnet.org>
> wrote:
>
> Well I don't do surveys for people usually, but like it or not we do things
> differently sometimes and sometimes it is related to being blind and other
> times it is just what we choose to do as people. I see no harm in the
> survey. You either help or you don't. I don't worry about people
> stereotyping me as a blind parent because they are going to do what they
> want to do. I don't have time to worry about that stuff. I am too busy
> just trying to be a parent in general and it ain't easy especially being a
> single parent and that has nothing to do with my blindness in my opinion.
>
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: BlParent [mailto:blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org] On Behalf Of Steve
> Jacobson via BlParent
> Sent: Monday, May 15, 2017 7:22 PM
> To: 'Blind Parents Mailing List' <blparent at nfbnet.org>
> Cc: Steve Jacobson <steve.jacobson at visi.com>
> Subject: Re: [blparent] (no subject)
>
> I probably should explain that this person did write to mee asking that I
> forward the original note to the list. I suggested that she or he just
> subscribe. I did not expect there would be so many notes, but it seemed to
> be from our correspondence that there was a genuine interest to learn. I
> will be honest, I tend not to take most surveys that come my way because
> there are so many, but I know that many people don't mind. Therefore, I
> feel it is reasonable to let each of you decide. I think there is a fine
> line between biases and simply not thinking things through rationally. For
> example, it always winds me up a little when people wonder how we detect
> that a child is choking when we can't see the visual effects. It seems odd
> to me that it never occurs to people that by the time a child exhibits
> behavior or starts turning a different color it is because the child has
> already been choking for a few seconds. If one is in tune with their
> child,
> they may well hear their child stop breathing well before visual effects
> are
> even noticed. People tend to have a perspective that is based upon what
> they are familiar with. It doesn't occur to them that there may well be
> auditory indications that become apparent before the visual ones. That is
> not to say that having the ability to see what is happening would not be
> useful, but there are other ways to deal with most problems.
>
> Since I don't know the details of the person's background who is doing the
> surveying, I think it makes sense to be respectful and participate in the
> survey if one has the time and the inclination. If this process dominates
> the list too long, we'll figure something out.
>
> Best regards,
>
> Steve Jacobson, List Moderator
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: BlParent [mailto:blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org] On Behalf Of Judy
> Jones
> via BlParent
> Sent: Monday, May 15, 2017 4:26 PM
> To: 'Blind Parents Mailing List' <blparent at nfbnet.org>
> Cc: Judy Jones <sonshines59 at gmail.com>
> Subject: Re: [blparent] (no subject)
>
> I do question that she is a design student, yet doing this research on
> parenting. She did not mention in the original e-mail that she is asking
> both blind and sighted parents. I guess I'm one of the suckers that
> answered her questions, but did it in the interest of, as always, debunking
> myths and stereotypes about blind persons. (smiles)
>
> Interesting observations.
>
> Judy
>
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: BlParent [mailto:blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org] On Behalf Of Star
> Gazer
> via BlParent
> Sent: Monday, May 15, 2017 3:20 PM
> To: 'Blind Parents Mailing List'
> Cc: Star Gazer
> Subject: Re: [blparent] (no subject)
>
> If you are interested in
> Sharon's course, why not sign up? You are free to do that as is anybody
> else
> who is interested.
> Is it just me, or do we have a college kid who is trying to take the
> "barely
> legal" way out of doing an assignment?
> Think about it, all she needs to do is copy and paste any responses she
> gets
> and hand them into her professor. She doesn't even have to hand key the
> responses.
> I also don't believe for a minute that you asked these same questions of
> sighted parents, and that you approached them with the same bias you have
> approached blind parents. You knew you would get the type of responses you
> did when you coupled it wht a bias that you may believe, or you may not
> believe. Point is, you just got a few nice ladies, and probably a lot of
> suckers to do your homework for you.
> You do realize that some of your questions apply to women who experience
> postpardum depression and/or anxiety, and that sight or lack thereof has
> nothing to do with it? You do realize that there are a boat load of
> industries that exist to support and assist families with infants. And, you
> do realize that there are not enough blind people having children to
> sustain
> these industries, right?
> You need to grow up, have some experiences, have children (because that's
> when you will discover you don't know what you think you know) and come
> back
> in a few years. Your homework is due soon, so I doubt you will do this.
>
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: BlParent [mailto:blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org] On Behalf Of Alomi
> Parikh via BlParent
> Sent: Monday, May 15, 2017 3:06 PM
> To: Blind Parents Mailing List <blparent at nfbnet.org>
> Cc: Alomi Parikh <alomiparikh24 at gmail.com>
> Subject: Re: [blparent] (no subject)
>
> Hi Sharon,
>
> Yes, I came across your course on your website and am extremely interested
> in knowing what and how you teach in this course. I completely understand
> if
> you cannot disclose details but a brief explanation would be a great start!
> I will definitely try and work on the perspective aspect that you
> mentioned.
>
> Thank you so much for replying and getting back to me!
>
> Regards,
> Alomi Parikh
>
> On Mon, May 15, 2017 at 10:55 PM, Sharon Howerton via BlParent <
> blparent at nfbnet.org> wrote:
>
> > Alomi, thank you for your questions. I work for the Hadley Institute
> > for the Blind and Visually Impaired and teach a three course parenting
> > series. We have students from all over the world, and I have had one
> > or two students from India who have taken the parenting courses with
> > me. I think the lifestyle in India may be different from what we
> > experience in the US where Indian parents may live with extended
> > family, for example, and some blind people in India may live
> > differently than we do as well. I would encourage you to get a lot
> > more information about blind parenting from both the American and
> > Indian perspective, for example, but first you might want to learn
> > about perceptions of blind individuals as this may be impacted by the
> > culture of one's country.
> > Good luck.
> > Sharon Howerton
> >
> > -----Original Message-----
> > From: BlParent [mailto:blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org] On Behalf Of Alomi
> > Parikh via BlParent
> > Sent: Monday, May 15, 2017 11:06 AM
> > To: Blind Parents Mailing List
> > Cc: Alomi Parikh
> > Subject: Re: [blparent] (no subject)
> >
> > Hi Judy,
> >
> > First of all, I'd like to heartily thank you for contacting me.
> > Secondly, I am extremely sorry if my assumptions hurt you in any way,
> > it was not my intention.
> >
> > I am also sorry I didn't make this clear, but no, I am not blind. I
> > have contacted the list to get a better insight and first hand reports
> > that would help me in my project. And yes, I am not a parent.
> >
> > I spoke to a couple of Blind Parents from India and they indicated
> > that they often had the help of their sighted friends and neighbors
> > and I made the mistake of generalizing this.
> >
> > Thank you for the rest of your answers, they were really helpful. But
> > I wanted to clarify a few things.
> >
> > The same set of questions were sent out to both Blind and Sighted
> parents.
> >
> > For example, my intention was not to imply that there is a problem
> > providing safety but to inquire if you faced any safety issues
> > personally.
> > They are multiple safety hazards to infants in general and my aim was
> > to find out if there is any major difference between the way Blind
> > Parents and Sighted Parents take care of their infants.
> >
> > As for the question about the most worrisome part of raising an
> > infant, I was just aiming at the psychology of the parent and not
> > attacking a problem in any way. For example, several sighted parents
> > replied with various answers such as Communication Gap, Making sure
> > they are healthy, Facing the unknown, Night shifts etc. Hence, it was
> > just a question to see how you as a parent (irrespective of being
> > Blind or not) felt while raising your kids.
> > I am sure you had some anxieties as well and that is what I was hoping
> > to understand.
> >
> > Nonetheless, I am sorry if I hurt your sentiments in anyway by making
> > any assumptions. But I am so glad that you replied as now I have a
> > more clear picture of my topic. Thank you so much for taking out the
> > time to read this long email and patiently reply to all my queries.
> >
> > I am eagerly waiting for more responses.
> >
> > To the other readers,
> >
> > I would like to reiterate to the others that personally I strongly
> > believe that Blind Parents are 100% capable to raise their infants. I
> > am just reaching out to understand if there are any problems or not
> > and want to clear out any assumptions.
> >
> > The following questions were sent out to both Blind and Sighted
> > Parents and in no way are singling out Blind Parents by assuming that
> > they will definitely have problems. These questions are to understand
> > more about your Psychology as a parent more than anything else.
> >
> >
> >
> >
> >
> >
> >
> >
> >
> >
> > *3. What are some of the other problems regarding safety that you
> > facedwhile raising your infant?4. What are some unconventional methods
> > you use to keep your infant safe?5. What is/was the most worrisome
> > part of raising an infant?6. What are some solutions you would
> > suggest?7. Would you like to say anything apart from the questions?*
> >
> > Thank you once again for your valuable time.
> >
> > Alomi Parikh
> >
> > On Mon, May 15, 2017 at 9:09 PM, Judy Jones via BlParent <
> > blparent at nfbnet.org> wrote:
> >
> > > Hello,
> > >
> > > Thank you for contacting this list.
> > >
> > > First of all, are you blind? I also take it that at your age, you
> > > are not yet a parent possibly?
> > >
> > > You are making assumptions too many times that others make, that the
> > > blind parents do need some sighted assistance. Not so.
> > >
> > > My blind husband and I raised two happy and healthy girls, who are
> > > now successful adults, and we had no outside sighted assistance. I
> > > will qualify that by saying that we have lots of sighted friends.
> > > We are very social, and our girls have been also. As a natural part
> > > of friendships, we would do things for each other. I would bake
> > > cookies, or watch other sighted friends' kids, for instance. The
> > > sighted parents might take my kids somewhere, because they could
> > > drive. But we also took our kids places on the bus. We did not
> > > have sighted help based on our blindness. We would do things for
> > > each other as a natural result of being friends and filling a need.
> > >
> > > We only used a baby sitter, believe it or not, once. Most of the
> > > time we hung with other parents who had kids, and we all would
> > > congregate in kid-friendly places, because we wanted to. We were
> > > very independent with our kids, using either cabs or buses to get
> > > them where they needed to go, and we took other sighted parents'
> > > kids with us, if their parents did not have the time or ability to
> > > drive
> them.
> > >
> > > To address your issues. Child safety is always of concern to
> > > parents, not just to blind parents. Providing that safety is not
> > > visual, but common sense. Again, you are making some underlying
> > > assumptions that are not necessarily true. Blind or sighted, you
> > > need to be aware of your environment, your child's environment, and
> > > be in tune with your child. We were aware of safety precautions we
> > > would need to take, and took them. A child who is choking is not
> > > going to just sit there and choke. He will be moving and showing
> > > other signs of distress, making some noises, breathing changes.
> > > Granted, blind parents cannot see skin pallor, but there are so many
> > > other symptoms that go along with what
> > is going on with the child.
> > > I'm
> > > speaking from experience.
> > >
> > > The answer to your second question is obvious. I would resolve the
> > > first-aid situation with steps that need to be taken at the time of
> > > the incident. It is good advice for parents to know CPR and take
> > > that and first aid classes that are offered in communities.
> > >
> > > The only unconventional things we did, but I got this idea from
> > > seeing a sighted parent do this, is we put bells on our toddlers'
> > > shoes so we could hear where they are. Another thing we did, if we
> > > called for the child and they did not respond, we would take it on
> > > ourselves to go find them. When we did, we would be very
> > > matter-of-fact and say something like, Oh, there you are, and not
> > > make a
> big deal out of it.
> > > We took control by finding the child ourselves, and not giving child
> > > the control to come to us when they felt like it. A great behavior
> > > to practice. By the way, I learned that one at guide dog school
> > > years before we had children. (smiles)
> > >
> > > Your next question, again, assumes there have to be problems in
> > > providing safety. There are not. The answer is prevention. There
> > > are priorities of providing safety. As a blindparent of a toddler,
> > > you cannot just sit in a chair, and tell toddler to come to you.
> > > You need to be on your feet with that toddler when he is exploring,
> > > when not by your side. That alone will eliminate a lot of safety
> issues.
> > > Your child is your responsibility, not someone else's.
> > >
> > > Any successful blind person becomes a problem-solver, and this is
> > > true of blind parents as well as sighted parents. We all do what we
> > > can to make any hazards nonissues by taking preventative steps in
> > > the first place and thinking ahead.
> > >
> > > Your next question, again you are assuming wrongly, in our case,
> > > that it was worrisome raising kids. It was not. It was delightful,
> > > lots of hard work, but we enjoyed it.
> > >
> > > Parenting skills have more to do with parenting, and not the fact
> > > that the parents are blind. I can tell you also from my experience
> > > of grown sighted kids that they will tell you the same thing.
> > >
> > > Judy
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > > From: BlParent [mailto:blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org] On Behalf Of
> > > Alomi Parikh via BlParent
> > > Sent: Monday, May 15, 2017 7:56 AM
> > > To: blparent at nfbnet.org
> > > Cc: Alomi Parikh
> > > Subject: [blparent] (no subject)
> > >
> > > Hello
> > >
> > > Respected Sir/Madam,
> > >
> > > I am Alomi Parikh, a 19-year old Design Student from MIT University
> > > in Pune, India.
> > >
> > > I have chosen to work with Parenting without SIght for a college
> project.
> > >
> > > While I strongly believe that Blind Parents are completely and
> > > wholly capable of raising their own children, society may think
> otherwise.
> > > However, I have researched and observed that while they are fully
> > > capable, they do rely on their sighted friends or family for certain
> > > reasons which curbs their independence slightly. I have also come to
> > > realise that raising an infant is the most difficult part and there
> > > are
> > multiple safety hazards.
> > >
> > > After extensive research, I have narrowed down the topic I want to
> > > work with as the following:
> > >
> > > Choking hazards are one of the most common safety hazards to infants
> > > (0-12 months). The symptoms of suffocation and choking are mainly
> > > visual symptoms.
> > > A totally blind parent, left alone with their child may find it
> > > difficult to diagnose this problem or may require the help of
> > > sighted friends and family.
> > > I want to work towards making them feel independent enough to
> > > realize what is wrong with their child and be able to take the
> > > necessary actions, by themselves or just like any other sighted parent.
> > >
> > > I would like to ask you a couple of questions regarding this and
> > > sincerely hope you can help and guide me through this.
> > >
> > > 1. Do you think this is a genuine problem? Is there anything you
> > > would like to add about this topic?
> > >
> > > 2. How would you tackle a situation where your infant is choking or
> > > suffocating but you cannot see the symptoms?
> > >
> > > 3. Would you like to be completely independent in taking care of
> > > such a situation? If you already are, I would love to know what kind
> > > of solutions or tactics you use.
> > >
> > > 3. What are some of the other problems regarding safety that you
> > > faced while raising your infant?
> > >
> > > 4. What are some unconventional methods you use to keep your infant
> safe?
> > >
> > > 5. What is/was the most worrisome part of raising an infant?
> > >
> > > 6. What are some solutions you would suggest?
> > >
> > > 7. Would you like to say anything apart from the questions?
> > >
> > > I am looking forward to a constructive and positive interaction.
> > >
> > > Thank you for your valuable time and help.
> > >
> > > Alomi Parikh
> > > _______________________________________________
> > > BlParent mailing list
> > > BlParent at nfbnet.org
> > > http://nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
> > > To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info
> > > for
> > > BlParent:
> > > http://nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/
> > > sonshines59%40gmail.co
> > > m
> > >
> > >
> > > _______________________________________________
> > > BlParent mailing list
> > > BlParent at nfbnet.org
> > > http://nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
> > > To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info
> > > for
> > > BlParent:
> > > http://nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/
> > > alomiparikh24%40gmail.com
> > >
> > _______________________________________________
> > BlParent mailing list
> > BlParent at nfbnet.org
> > http://nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
> > To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
> > BlParent:
> > http://nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/shrnhow%40gmail.
> > com
> >
> >
> > _______________________________________________
> > BlParent mailing list
> > BlParent at nfbnet.org
> > http://nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
> > To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
> > BlParent:
> > http://nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/
> > alomiparikh24%40gmail.com
> >
> _______________________________________________
> BlParent mailing list
> BlParent at nfbnet.org
> http://nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
> BlParent:
> http://nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/
> pickrellrebecca%40gmai
> l.com
>
>
> _______________________________________________
> BlParent mailing list
> BlParent at nfbnet.org
> http://nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
> BlParent:
> http://nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/
> sonshines59%40gmail.co
> m
>
>
> _______________________________________________
> BlParent mailing list
> BlParent at nfbnet.org
> http://nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
> BlParent:
> http://nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/
> steve.jacobson%40visi.
> com
>
>
>
> _______________________________________________
> BlParent mailing list
> BlParent at nfbnet.org
> http://nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
> BlParent:
> http://nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/
> dianna24%40earthlink.n
> et
>
>
> _______________________________________________
> BlParent mailing list
> BlParent at nfbnet.org
> http://nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
> BlParent:
> http://nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/
> alomiparikh24%40gmail.com
> _______________________________________________
> BlParent mailing list
> BlParent at nfbnet.org
> http://nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
> BlParent:
> http://nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/
> sonshines59%40gmail.co
> m
>
>
> _______________________________________________
> BlParent mailing list
> BlParent at nfbnet.org
> http://nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
> BlParent:
> http://nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/
> alomiparikh24%40gmail.com
>
More information about the BlParent
mailing list