[blparent] New blind parents

[Jo Elizabeth Pinto]

When my daughter was in the first grade, she had experienced some teasing, so I did a class presentation. I was hoping it would make the kids more comfortable about blindness so they wouldn't tease her anymore. (It turned out they teased her because she and I walked lots of places instead of me driving her everywhere, not directly because I was blind, and that slowed down but didn't stop once kids met my guide dog.)

Anyway, at the end of the presentation, the teacher, in a somewhat rehearsed question, asked my daughter what it was like having a blind mom.

My daughter, in a completely unrehearsed answer, said, "Oh, it's just like having a regular mom, except Daddy doesn't let her drive his car."


Jo Elizabeth Pinto

"The Bright Side of Darkness"
Is my award-winning novel,
Available in Kindle, audio, and paperback formats.
http://www.amazon.com/author/jepinto

-----Original Message-----
From: BlParent <blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org> On Behalf Of Michael Bullis via BlParent
Sent: Monday, June 25, 2018 7:31 AM
To: 'Blind Parents Mailing List' <blparent at nfbnet.org>
Cc: Michael Bullis <bullis.michael at gmail.com>
Subject: Re: [blparent] New blind parents

My daughter was born in 2002.  The only advice I can give is that when you think that something requires sight, there is usually a way to do it without sight.  People around you will have their opinions and as with most things, they're trying to be helpful but have no real information about the alternative ways blind people do things.  It doesn't usually pay to fight about it at the moment but just wait until they go home and figure it out yourself.  I think it helped that I'd been a farmer and had pretty much found solutions as I went along, so, having a daughter was just another problem solving opportunity.  When my daughter was three years old I decided I should tell her I was blind.  She asked what that meant and I explained that my eyes didn't work.  She thought about that for a couple of days and came back to say, "You're not blind."  When I asked her why, she said, "Because you do everything for me that mama does."  Although I might wonder at that early age why she had already decided that not seeing was a disadvantage, I chose to take it as a compliment, because my goal had been to do everything for our daughter that my sighted wife did and I had apparently succeeded.
All in all it was a fun experience, finding new ways to do things I had never done.
Kids are wonderful.  Enjoy the experience.  They'll only be kids once and the time goes very quickly, but, you're setting the pattern for their life and how they will regard you.  I never asked my daughter to be my eyes for anything when she was done.  Probably carried it a bit far, but, I didn't want her to feel like she had that role.  
Enjoy!


-----Original Message-----
From: BlParent [mailto:blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org] On Behalf Of Tony Malykh via BlParent
Sent: Sunday, June 24, 2018 4:31 PM
To: Blind Parents Mailing List <blparent at nfbnet.org>
Cc: Tony Malykh <anton.malykh at gmail.com>
Subject: Re: [blparent] New blind parents

Thank you all for your replies! It's so nice to see so much support here.
Probably we will have a lot of concrete questions a few months later. But in the mean time, me and my wife are going to study all these materials that you guys recommended.

Tony

On 6/23/18, Tony Malykh <anton.malykh at gmail.com> wrote:
> Hi all,
>
> Both me and my wife are visually impaired and we have a baby on the way.
> We don't have any experience, but we'd like to learn how to do it right.
> I don't have any specific questions at this moment, but I am wondering 
> if you guys have any advice on how to be a blind parent in general? Is 
> there any tutorial on how to be a blind parent?
>
>
> Thanks
>
> Tony
>
>
>
>

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