[blParent] having major problems with grandson

[joanne]

Hi. I have watched children pretty regularly since 1981, practically raising my nieces and nephew and regularly watching their relatives. I had 2 children who are moms, so I am pretty experienced and truly haven't had any major problems. Between my kids and nieces and nephews and grandkids they all seem to want to be around me and I love it.

I'm helping my daughter by taking care of her toddler while she works. I also live with them and there's also an older grandson. I have never in my life come up against such a strong-willed and often defiant child. He's a sweetheart but he can switch to a little terror, complete with blind tricking me. He runs so fast and grabs anything he wants to with lightning speed. I try to catch him and take whatever his busy hands found, but when my daughter comes home it's obvious I didn't get it all and he gets into everyone's stuff but his own. Telling him no and putting him in time-out doesn't seem to work. He knows not to do this, but he'll do it anyway and tell me there's nothing in his hand (as I hear him messing with a candy wrapper and have to intercept it). My daughter wants me to put this harness on him and walk with him like he's a dog on a leash. She is gone around 10-12 hours a day, and she thinks I'm gonna hang onto this thing that whole time? I see why she wants me to use it; never have I dealt with such a sneaky and strong-willed little one. But isn't a harness just plain wrong? His grandpa used one, which is where my daughter got the idea. But he was watching him a couple hours and his health just isn't up for trying to chase the child around. But I don't know ... isn't there a better way to deal with this than a harness? Often what I'll do is put it on him but not hold on, so I can hear the end of it moving as he walks ... kind of like putting bells on shoes. It's a lot easier to follow him because it does make a sound as he walks, but I just wondered if anyone here has dealt with a pretty unruly child who knows how to blind trick and doesn't listen to anything you tell him to do. My daughter says watch super nanny; she said that when I told her I'm done and want to quit. I didn't want to do this full-time in the first place and she knows it. But the other people who watch him are his grandparents and unfortunately their grandfather fell pretty ill. I just dread every day and watch the clock for nap time, I kid you not. Just really stuck here. If this was my first attempt at watching a kid that'd be one thing, but I've done this for years and this is my first failure.

Please help.

Joanne


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