[Faith-talk] FW: [thefamilyoffaith] No Fear in the New Year

[Eric Calhoun]

Original Message: 
From: "revjoe2701 at comcast.net" <revjoe2701 at comcast.net>
To: "-???---Rev. Joe Diaz---???" <revjoe2701 at comcast.net>
Subject: [thefamilyoffaith] No Fear in the New Year
Date: 
Sat, 31 Dec 2011 10:10:02 -0800 (Pacific Standard Time)

 

 


Thought for Today 

 

"As we grow older in life, years somehow seem to shorten and New Year's
Day
approaches with an ever increasing tempo. The more mature we get, the
more
we realize that time is only relative; how we live means more than how
long
we live. Haply also we do not live by years, but by days. In His wisdom
God
does not show us all that lies ahead. So we enter a new year to live it
day
by day. What is past is past. Today we start anew, and what we do today
will
make our life for tomorrow. Chin up, shoulders straight, eyes agleam, let
us
salute the New Year, and each day let us follow more faithfully, more
courageously, more daringly the lead of our great Captain who bids us
follow
Him." - William Thomson Hanzsche 

 


The Lift 

 

No Fear in the New Year 

(by Chek Phang Hia, from Our Daily Bread 12/30/08) 

 

Hours before 2007 began, some friends of ours in the UK were aboard their
boat, anticipating the arrival of the new year, when a violent storm
struck.
But they were able to send us this reassuring note: "John and Linda are
sitting on board the good ship Norna, and happy to say that we are secure.
.
. . The wind is storm force ten [48-55 knots]. Hope that all of you have
a
happy and prosperous new year." 

 

Jesus' disciples also encountered a stormy experience. They were on the
Sea
of Galilee when a windstorm whipped up (Mark 6:48). The storm was so
violent
that despite being experienced fishermen who knew the lake well, they
feared
for their lives. But Jesus walked out to them and saved them. 

 

No one can predict with certainty how stormy the new year will be. We do
know, though, that everyone will face storms. But we who have Jesus have
our
future securely moored to Him. Jesus, who did not fail us in the past,
will
not fail us in the future. 

 

Lewis Edgar Jones aptly described our situation in his old hymn: 

 

I've anchored in Jesus, the storms of life I'll brave; 

I've anchored in Jesus, I'll fear no wind or wave. 

I've anchored in Jesus, for He hath power to save; 

I've anchored to the Rock of Ages! 

 

How will you fare in the storms of the new year? If you're anchored in
Jesus
 you have nothing to fear. 

 

Faith in Christ will keep us steady in the stormy sea of change. 

 

 


The Laugh 

 

Letter to a Bank 

[Edited] 

>From Laugh and Lift

 

This is an actual letter sent to a Bank in the United States. The Bank
Manager thought it funny enough to have it published in the New York
Times. 

 

Dear Sir: 

 

I am writing to thank you for bouncing my check with which I endeavored
to
pay my plumber last month. By my calculations some three nanoseconds must
have elapsed between his presenting the check and the arrival in my
account
of the funds needed to honor it. I refer, of course, to the automatic
monthly deposit of my entire salary, and arrangement which, I admit, has
only been in place for eight years. You are to be commended for seizing
that
brief window of opportunity, and also for debiting my account by $50 by
way
of penalty for the inconvenience I caused to your bank. 

 

My thankfulness springs from the manner in which this incident has caused
me
to rethink my errant financial ways. You have set me on the path of
fiscal
righteousness. No more will our relationship be blighted by these
unpleasant
incidents, for I am restructuring my affairs in the new year, taking as
my
model the procedures, attitudes and conduct of your very bank. I can
think
of no greater compliment and I know you will be excited and proud to hear
it
 

 

To this end, please be advised about the following changes: I have
noticed
that whereas I personally attend to your telephone calls and letters,
when I
try to contact you, I am confronted by the impersonal, ever-changing,
prerecorded, faceless entity which your bank has become. From now on I,
like
you, choose only to deal with a flesh-and-blood person. My mortgage and
loan
repayments will, therefore and hereafter, no longer be automatic, but
will
arrive at your bank, by check, addressed personally and confidentially to
an
employee at your branch whom you must nominate. You will be aware that it
is
an offense under the Postal Act for any other person to open such an
envelope. 

 

Please find attached an Application Contact Status which I require your
chosen employee to complete. I am sorry it runs to eight pages, but in
order
that I know as much about him or her as your bank knows about me, there
is
no alternative. 

 

Please note that all copies of his or her medical history must be
countersigned by a Notary Public, and the mandatory details of his/her
financial situation (income, debts, assets and liabilities) must be
accompanied by documented proof. In due course I will issue your employee
with a PIN number which he/she must quote in dealings with me. I regret
that
it cannot be shorter than 28 digits but, again, I have modeled it on the
number of button presses required to access my account balance on your
phone
bank service. 

 

As they say, imitation is the sincerest form of flattery. Let me level
the
playing field even further by introducing you to my new telephone system,
which you will notice, is very much like yours. My Authorized Contact at
your bank, the only person with whom I will have any dealings, may call me
at any time and will be answered by an automated voice service: Press
buttons as follows: 

 

1. To make an appointment to see me. 

2. To query a missing payment. 

3. To transfer the call to my living room in case I am there. 

4. To transfer the call to my bedroom in case I am sleeping. 

5. To transfer the call to my toilet in case I am attending to nature. 

6. To transfer the call to my mobile phone if I am not at home. 

7. To leave a message on my computer, a password to access my computer is
required. Password will be communicated at a later date to the Authorized
Contact. 

8. To return to the main menu and to listen to options 1 through 7 

9. To make a general complaint or inquiry. The contact will then be put
on
hold, pending the attention of my automated answering service. While this
may on occasion involve a lengthy wait, uplifting music will play for the
duration of the call. This month I've chosen a refrain from "The Best of
Woodie Guthrie: "Oh, the banks are made of marble, With a guard at every
door, And the vaults are filled with silver, That the miners sweated for."


 

On a more serious note, we come to the matter of cost. As your bank has
often pointed out, the ongoing drive for greater efficiency comes at a
cost
which you have always been quick to pass on to me. Let me repay your
kindness by passing some costs back. First, there is a matter of
advertising
material you send me. This I will read for a fee of $20 per page.
Inquiries
from the Authorized Contact will be billed at $5 per minute of my time
spent
in response. Any debits to my account, as, for example, in the matter of
the
penalty for the dishonored check, will be passed back to you. 

 

My new phone service runs at 75 cents a minute. You will be well advised
to
keep your inquiries brief and to the point. Regrettably, but again
following
your example, I must also levy an establishment fee to cover the setting
up
of this new arrangement. 

 

May I wish you a happy, if ever-so-slightly less prosperous, New Year? 


 






 

CONTACT / FINAL INFO 

 

Do you disagree with something in today's issue? Before writing me, read
this. 

 

To contact me, Chris Long, simply reply to this email and type your
message
to me just as you would reply to any other email. Or you can contact me
via
the web at http://www.laughandlift.com/contact.html 

 

May you have a WONDERFUL day today! :) 

 

Your Brother in Christ, 

 

Chris Long 

Laugh & Lift Ministries 

http://www.laughandlift.com