[Faith-talk] thank you all

[Poppa Bear]

Hello Debbi, I have had something like that happen to me as well over the
last two months. My mother in law has not been happy about the way that her
grandson, my 17 year old step son is being raised. He has been kicked out of
almost every school he has ever attended and when he has attempted to live
with other family members including her, his grandma he was even kicked out
after a couple months. Well we ended up having a long talk and she basically
became hysterical and started making completely insane accusations against
me and started bringing up my past life from almost 20 years ago when I was
not much older than him. I wasn't even part of the family then, but she just
slammed me over and over and it hurt so much. I didn't even try to defend
myself or bring up her past of being an alcoholic or how she allowed her
children to be abused by their step father, I just tried to be calm because
the whole interaction was so painful to me. Her words cut me like knives, I
felt that we were really close.
We haven't talked since then, not even at family events. I can tell that her
husband was really hurt by the way she acted as well, but he wouldn't dare
to try and defend me at that point. I am trying to give it time and just let
God's will be done in the matter. For a while I would be laying in bed and I
could feel my heart racing when I thought about the stuff she had said to me
because it hurt so bad, but I just kept giving it over to God and now it is
much more bearable. I hope that over time you will find the needed closure
to be able to move on.  

-----Original Message-----
From: Faith-talk [mailto:faith-talk-bounces at nfbnet.org] On Behalf Of Debby
Phillips via Faith-talk
Sent: Friday, April 03, 2015 8:16 AM
To: Vejas Vasiliauskas; Faith-talk, for the discussion of faith and
religion; faith-talk at nfbnet.org
Subject: Re: [Faith-talk] thank you all

Perhaps you just need distance.  I'm going to tell you about 
something that happened to me recently, and I'll try not to be 
too long-winded.  It's still a bit emotionally raw for me, and 
has not been resolved.  My husband's brother's wife and I have 
had a rocky relationship.  I think it's perhaps that in some ways 
we are alike, so we butt heads.  Or we are so opposite, maybe? I 
don't know.  Anyway, we were dealing with some issues regarding 
our mother-in-law, and I asked a question that obviously she 
didn't like.  Now, I thought that it was a good question, and one 
that needed to be asked.  Now my husband who was observing all of 
this told me that as soon as I asked the question her body 
language changed, and she became angry.  We both said things that 
we shouldn't have said, and when I tried to walk away, she made 
one last comment, which made me so angry that I really lost it.  
That led to some very nasty emails.  Did I act in a Christian 
way? No.  But for now, there is really nothing I can do to fix 
it.  I don't know if I ever will be able to.  I am very sorry 
about what happened, and wish that things could be different.  
But they can't.  Not yet anyway.  Sometimes we need time and 
distance.  My guess is that you'll meet some time, maybe years 
from now, and things will be better.    Blessings,    Debby

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