[Faith-talk] forgiveness Re: developmental delay among the blind

[Vejas Vasiliauskas]

Hi Maureen,
I'm so glad you found the Lord.
Your statement about not considering yourself the victim really hit
home with me. It's hard, but even if you ARE the victim, you shouldn't
think of yourself as one.
The truth is that not everyone whom you tell your hardships to is
going to feel sorry for you. An example is that I was bullied
(verbally) for a while at school from someone who should have known
better a couple of years ago. I was upset but, for the first few
months, also felt that, as the victim, everyone should feel sorry for
me. I was shocked when not everyone automatically said "Wow, that
person (the bully) sounds like a a jerk, so let's act like he doesn't
exist!"
Also, by considering myself the victim, I would be allowing the person
who did the bullying to win, since they got what they wanted.
So I feel like we have the right to be sorry for ourselves for a
little bit, but not too much. I'm still in the forgiving process but
I'm kind of glad that I don't tell people anymore what happened just
so that they can feel sorry for me. What I really want to do now is
help others who have been bullied and be a support for them.
I'd really like to ask you all how you went about forgiving people who
did harm to you in life. You don't need to share your full story, but
I'd really appreciate some strategies you used to forgive the person
even if they never apologized. Or is it just time?
Vejas

On 12/30/14, Maureen Pranghofer via Faith-talk <faith-talk at nfbnet.org> wrote:
> Hi
> I was also chosen last, alone much of the time as a child and I was
> partially sighted but didn't have enough vision to be like sighted kids and
> with physical disabilities as well I stuck out like a sore thumb.  It wasn't
> until I was found by the LOrd when I was 16 and was contemplating suicide
> that I started very gradually to be not so full of insecurity and self pity.
> I used to see myself always as the victum which was not helped by remarks
> from people saying "Oh you poor thing."  I'm so glad that is in the past.
>
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: Brandon A. Olivares via Faith-talk
> Sent: Tuesday, December 30, 2014 11:22 AM
> To: justin williams ; Faith-talk,for the discussion of faith and religion
> Subject: Re: [Faith-talk] developmental delay among the blind
>
> It doesn't help we often don't have as many opportunities to socialize. I
> don't know how it was for everyone else here, but I know in grade school, I
> was often chosen last for groups, simply because others didn't know what to
> make of me. For me I didn't really start becoming comfortable in social
> situations until college, when I joined a fraternity of all things. They
> helped me to loosen up and treated me like just another person.
>
>> On Dec 30, 2014, at 11:35 AM, justin williams via Faith-talk
>> <faith-talk at nfbnet.org> wrote:
>>
>> A lot of it is putting the child in position to experience the world
>> through
>> their other senses.  If I am sitting in a group of people, and something
>> totally visual is on a TV screen, and I don't react to it, I can come off
>> as
>> developmentally delayed; if the child doesn't stack the blocks, because
>> they
>> don't see the other kids doing it, they may come off developmentally
>> delayed
>> even with no mental disabilities.  Anytime you are not quite on what
>> everyone else is doing, it can seem like that.
>>
>> -----Original Message-----
>> From: Faith-talk [mailto:faith-talk-bounces at nfbnet.org] On Behalf Of Debby
>> Phillips via Faith-talk
>> Sent: Tuesday, December 30, 2014 9:39 AM
>> To: Timothy Clark Ministries; Faith-talk, for the discussion of faith and
>> religion; programmer2188 at gmail.com; faith-talk at nfbnet.org
>> Subject: Re: [Faith-talk] developmental delay among the blind
>>
>> From the time I was very small, I was taught to look in people's direction
>> when they talked, to reach out and shake hands, things like that.  Plus I
>> grew up with brothers and I had to be rough and tumble to get along with
>> them.  Plus I tried and still try to be observant.  I am blind from birth,
>> too.  A lot of my life I have been mainly with sighted folks.  But in the
>> last couple years, it's been more with blind folks.  I think that perhaps
>> we
>> can't really generalize about blind from birth versus becoming
>> blind later on.  It really depends on so many factors.
>> Blessings,    Debby and Neena
>>
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>
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