[IL-Talk] [EXTERNAL] Re: Where do people get a license to put their hands on us?

Fri Sep 30 05:21:20 UTC 2022

Oh my goodness, that could've been really dangerous! The one thing I can say is with a dog I don't have that problem.

Sent from my iPhone

> On Sep 27, 2022, at 6:40 PM, Patti S Chang via IL-Talk <il-talk at nfbnet.org> wrote:
> 
> Don't get me started about how it was when I was 9 months pregnant with Julia and riding the CTA. 
> 
> 
> Patti Chang
> 2nd Vice President
> National Federation of the Blind of Illinois
> https://www.nfbofillinois.org
> Pronouns: she, her, hers
> 
> -----Original Message-----
> From: IL-Talk <il-talk-bounces at nfbnet.org> On Behalf Of Dale, Yusef (USAILN) via IL-Talk
> Sent: Tuesday, September 27, 2022 5:38 PM
> To: NFB of Illinois Mailing List <il-talk at nfbnet.org>
> Cc: Dale, Yusef (USAILN) <Yusef.Dale at usdoj.gov>; 'Kelly Pierce' <kellytalk at gmail.com>
> Subject: Re: [IL-Talk] [EXTERNAL] Re: Where do people get a license to put their hands on us?
> 
> My friend is blind, if that wasn't obvious from the context.
> 
> -----Original Message-----
> From: IL-Talk <il-talk-bounces at nfbnet.org> On Behalf Of Dale, Yusef (USAILN) via IL-Talk
> Sent: Tuesday, September 27, 2022 5:25 PM
> To: NFB of Illinois Mailing List <il-talk at nfbnet.org>
> Cc: Dale, Yusef (USAILN) <YDale at usa.doj.gov>; 'Kelly Pierce' <kellytalk at gmail.com>
> Subject: Re: [IL-Talk] [EXTERNAL] Re: Where do people get a license to put their hands on us?
> 
> I was not going to post, but, PGC, you made me do it.  I once was lamenting to a friend about this very issue; it's always been a substantial source of irritation/frustration for me.  My friend is a petite white woman, and I'm 6'5, 225 and black.  She remarked to me that if I think I get grabbed a lot, could I imagine how bad it was for her! She said that most days, after arriving home from being out and about, she feels like she needs immediately to wash her clothes, bathe, and go to anger management (or make herself a strong drink).  All I could say was, touché!
> 
> So, yes, I don't think there can be any doubt that it happens more to women, and that's scary, because I feel like it happens a lot to me (it also makes sense that older age would play a role and, too, it's similar to the touching phenomenon described by pregnant women). I'm downtown Chicago, daily, and I feel like it happens to me at least once a week (though it's probably a little less frequent than that).  My method is similar to ones already expressed; I typically stop cold in my tracks and give what I'm hoping is a death stare or exaggeratedly move away from the hand/grab.  I'm usually too irritated/frustrated to be civil, so I typically opt to say nothing rather than say something snarky/nasty.  That's my compromise, as I do try to remember that people think they're helping. But the entitlement that strangers think they have to touch us is a real problem!  
> 
> -----Original Message-----
> From: IL-Talk <il-talk-bounces at nfbnet.org> On Behalf Of Patti S Chang via IL-Talk
> Sent: Tuesday, September 27, 2022 4:00 PM
> To: 'NFB of Illinois Mailing List' <il-talk at nfbnet.org>
> Cc: Patti S Chang <pattischang at gmail.com>; 'Kelly Pierce' <kellytalk at gmail.com>
> Subject: [EXTERNAL] Re: [IL-Talk] Where do people get a license to put their hands on us?
> 
> As an aside, I would love to see some research on this, but I suspect this happens much more with women than men and the older I get the more people seem to grab me too. 
> 
> 
> 
> Patti Chang
> 2nd Vice President
> National Federation of the Blind of Illinois https://protect2.fireeye.com/v1/url?k=c440cca8-9bdbf464-c447e84d-0cc47adca7dc-f4940d24397b4636&q=1&e=7170ef85-a9e5-4154-870b-093eb3c889a0&u=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.nfbofillinois.org%2F
> Pronouns: she, her, hers
> 
> -----Original Message-----
> From: IL-Talk <il-talk-bounces at nfbnet.org> On Behalf Of Kelly Pierce via IL-Talk
> Sent: Tuesday, September 27, 2022 1:55 PM
> To: NFB of Illinois Mailing List <il-talk at nfbnet.org>
> Cc: Kelly Pierce <kellytalk at gmail.com>
> Subject: Re: [IL-Talk] Where do people get a license to put their hands on us?
> 
> Iowa long time Federationist Peggy Pinder Elliot offered some great advice on this topic a long time ago. She says she talks with her feet. First she stops walking when someone grabs her. She then asks to be released from the sighted person’s grasp. If they do not respond immediately, then she sits down in place wherever she is at the time.
> They always release when she sits in place.
> 
> When I am grabbed, which is rare for me, I respond with “I will follow you and take your directions” I have never needed to sit in place.
> 
> Kelly
> 
> 
> 
>> On 9/27/22, Leslie Hamric via IL-Talk <il-talk at nfbnet.org> wrote:
>> Wow! Even more interesting way to look at it.
>> 
>> Leslie Hamric
>> Cello and Braille Music Teacher
>> Board member of National Federation of the Blind Performing Arts 
>> Division
>> 
>> 
>>> On Sep 27, 2022, at 1:43 PM, Deborah Kent Stein via IL-Talk 
>>> <il-talk at nfbnet.org> wrote:
>>> 
>>> 
>>> 
>>> In this day and age, I think most people are learning not to grab 
>>> children.
>>> Somehow that doesn't translate to not grabbing us. We're still fair game.
>>> 
>>> Debbie
>>> 
>>> 
>>> -----Original Message-----
>>> From: IL-Talk [mailto:il-talk-bounces at nfbnet.org] On Behalf Of
>>> dandrews920--- via IL-Talk
>>> Sent: Tuesday, September 27, 2022 1:32 PM
>>> To: 'NFB of Illinois Mailing List' <il-talk at nfbnet.org>
>>> Cc: dandrews920 at comcast.net
>>> Subject: Re: [IL-Talk] Where do people get a license to put their 
>>> hands on us?
>>> 
>>> They think of us as children, so it is OK to grab.
>>> 
>>> Dave
>>> 
>>> 
>>> 
>>> -----Original Message-----
>>> From: IL-Talk <il-talk-bounces at nfbnet.org> On Behalf Of Leslie Hamric 
>>> via IL-Talk
>>> Sent: Tuesday, September 27, 2022 10:54 AM
>>> To: Iltalk <il-talk at nfbnet.org>
>>> Cc: Leslie Hamric <lhamric930 at comcast.net>
>>> Subject: [IL-Talk] Where do people get a license to put their hands on us?
>>> 
>>> Good morning Federationists. Today I was going to an eye doctor 
>>> appointment.
>>> And from the door of the building to the elevator, and then up to the 
>>> office, I had a total of three people grab my arm. Of course, they 
>>> thought they were helping when they really weren't. So I decided to 
>>> try a new approach. Instead of saying, please don't grab, I said, 
>>> please don't grab it's not safe. You should see how they back off 
>>> when they hear the words it's not safe. And then, of course, each one 
>>> got all apologetic. So, of course, I did some educating and then they 
>>> got it. And then, when I got down the elevator back to the main 
>>> entrance, a fourth person said, can I help you and they grab my arm.
>>> So I started the process all over again. All we ask for as blind 
>>> people is an assumption of competence. Where did the cited people get 
>>> off thinking that they can just put their hands on us? I wish I knew.
>>> But until then, I will keep educating.
>>> 
>>> Leslie Hamric
>>> Cello and Braille Music Teacher
>>> Board member of National Federation of the Blind Performing Arts 
>>> Division
>>> 
>>> 
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>> 
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