[nabs-l] People are weird when it comes to blindness

[Christina Mitchell]

When someone says they admire what I do or that I'm doing great, I
just take it as a compliment and thank them.  I don't get upset about
it.  I would be more upset if they start asking me why am I walking
when I can't see where I'm going.  At least they know I'm trying,
hence the reason why they say I'm doing great or they admire me.  In
this case, I don't think these people were doing this in an attempt to
be mean, they're simply trying to help but don't know the best way
how, hence the reason why they react in ways we don't consider
helpful.  Just my 2 sense.

On 6/22/09, Jim Reed <jim275_2 at yahoo.com> wrote:
> Hey all,
>
> Me and my cane took a walk last night, and my walk just happened to coincide
> with the end of a festival at the park, so allot of people were out.
>
> First, I was working on non-visual travel, and as usual, I got myself lost,
> so I st oped where I was and I was trying to listen for traffic or anything
> else that might give me a clue, then this guy started yelling from his porch
> "are you OK, do you need any help, do you know where you are, where are you
> going..." I yelled back that "I was fine, that I did not need any help, and
> that I was trying to figure it out for myself". I continued to stand there,
> trying to figure it out,  and trying to listen for traffic, and this guy
> continued to stand there and yell. It got to the point where he was being so
> distracting that I just said "F This",  and moved on, thus a learning
> opportunity was lost.
>
> Then, a little later, I was crossing the footbridge that borders campus, and
> I stopped walking because I thought I heard a footstep, and I did not want
> to whack anyone with my cane. Then, this lady approaches me, introduces
> herself, shakes my hand, tells me that she had been following me for a block
> or two, and then she tells me that "you are doing great", and that "I admire
> you". I politely said thanks; I didn't have the heart to tell her that I
> really wasn't blind (in the way she expected me to be blind, anyway). But
> really, I was thinking, "First of all, why is this lady admiring me? All I
> am doing is taking a walk, which nearly every human on the planet can do."
> Then, I thought, "how does this lady know I am "doing great"? She has no
> clue where I started, or where I was going. She has no clue if I am lost two
> miles in the wrong direction, nor does she know whether or not I fell off of
> half a dozen curbs in the process of getting to school."
>
>  I guess I should be proud of the fact that after only one or two weeks of
> cane travel experience, that I already put off a vibe that tells others "I
> know what I am doing".
>
> I guess this lady struck me as odd because her views on blindness are so
> much different than mine. This lady is willing to assume, after observing a
> blind stranger travel two blocks, that I am fully competent and capable. I
> would not be willing to make that assumption. Why is this lady making such
> assumptions about me? I am not complaining that this lady thinks I am
> capable,  I am complaining because this lady feels she has all the
> information she needs to make such a decision after watching me walk only
> two blocks. My point is, by walking two blocks, I have not proven anything,
> this lady has no basis by which to judge me, be it positive or negative
> judgments. Let me prove myself, let me earn your complements and your
> admiration; don't just give them to me.
>
> Thoughts?
> Jim
>
> "From compromise and things half done,
> Keep me with stern and stubborn pride,
> And when at last the fight is won,
> ... Keep me still unsatisfied." --Louis Untermeyer
>
>
>
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-- 
Christina