[nabs-l] learning independent living

[Christina Mitchell]

My mom is just like your mom.  She wants nobody in the kitchen with
her helping her cook.  She's the type of person who's into doing her
own cooking and cleaning.  I never was taught life skills when I was
little so I had to catch up with it later when I turned an adult.  I
remember when I was little, I tampered with the stove just to see how
a stove worked and my mom scolded me for it.  She didn't want me near
a stove whatsoever.  If I got burned, she would have a fit.  When I
was 9, I was away from my mom for an issue I won't get into and was
placed in my aunt's care.  I wasn't as independent with her either.
My sister and I both had chores but they were simple ones.  We mainly
had to keep our room cleaned and after dinner, I would take out the
trash and put away dishes while my sister washed the dishes.  Then
when I got older I learned to wash the dishes.  My aunt figured that
because I was too young that I would be more proned to breaking the
dishes so that's why she had my sister wash them.  I would put away
the plastic bowls and she would put the plates away.  I learned to
cook simple things as boiling eggs, making hotdogs ETC, but not
preparing big meals because she would do all of that.  So as I got
older, I then went to training centers and had ADL lessons at my own
apartment.  I still need help with some things I'm still not too keen
on.  My fiance and I live together and he's also blind.  He was taught
life skills when he was younger so he's a big help to me in showing me
things I still don't know how to do.  We help out each other.
Whatever he doesn't know I teach him and whatever I don't know he
teaches me.  I too wish I had patient parents and an aunt who would've
taught me more then what I did.

On 5/24/09, Ashley  Bramlett <bookwormahb at earthlink.net> wrote:
> Hi all,
>
> I know we can attend centers to learn life skills as adults.  But I think
> its better to learn skills growing up at age appropriate times.
> Unfortunately, while I recieved great academic services like braille
> handouts and alternative formats for texts, I did not get much independent
> living training. I plan to do something about that of course.
> I think parents should take an active role in teaching skills so you're not
> catching up later on and learning skills you could have learned at age 9.
>
> For me, my mom did not want us kids in the kitchen with her.  She wanted to
> do things her way on her own.  So this isn't a totally blindness thing.  My
> brothers were older.  The extent of their cooking was microwaving food or
> preparing cereal.
> My brothers didn't do many house chores probably for the same reasons.  They
> did more than me though.
>
> I learned braille and had some O/M in school.  I learned computers and my
> technology through tutors at the department for the blind and reading the
> mannual.
>
> I was sent a rehab teacher as a teen after school at home.  I had two.  They
> taught me some basics.  They labeled the appliances, showed me how to do
> laundry and labeled it and more.  They showed me dimo tape and how to label.
>
> We did some cooking  and cleaning.
> This was helpful.
> I'd like to hear what you learned at home since I shared mine.
> So my questions are:
> 1. Did you do cooking at the age appropriate times?
> Were you able to do as much as your siblings if you have them?
> 2.  Did you participate in doing chores or other tasks as part of the
> family?  I actually met a blind teen who did house work and recieved
> allowance.  So I know some parents do this.  This girl, Amanda, was not a
> federationist but her family raised her with nfb philosophy.
>
> 3. What do you wish your parents or family had done differently.
> For me I wish I had more opportunity and a patient mom to help me learn and
> then I would help her fix dinner.
> I met a few blind peers at camp who said their mothers let them make a dish
> for dinner such as a salad or dessert.  I wish I had done that.
> Unfortunately many of us are  protected and in reality we were pretty
> capable.  I guess most of you went to centers to rectify any deficits or
> learned on your own.
>
> Ashley
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-- 
Christina