[nabs-l] Sociaolizing Part2

[Jewel S.]

Quick note...if you are at a restaurant, it is perfectly acceptable to
order food cut prior to reaching the table. The cooks have a quick and
easy way of cutting meat and such, and it is not a burden nor is it a
rare request. So if you're out at a restaurant, just ask for the cook
to have the food cut before it comes to the table. No one will think
anything of it. This is good for while you are learning how to cut
your food, and even for after you learn if at a fancy restaurant and
you don't trust yourself to keep food on the plate (sometimes, because
of my nerve pain and shaking, I have a lot of trouble cutting food, so
I still get it pre-cut at times).

As for rides, yes, you should be the one to ask. However, if you have
other transportation, such as city buses, paratransit services, or
your two feet, you should consider thesese as well. Don't put all the
weight of your transportation on your friends and family. Learn the
bus routes to the places you go most, and learn about other
transporation options. There is a book called "How to Live Well
Without Owning a Car." It is available from the NLS BARD website in
digital audio format, and is very useful. It is written for anyone who
doesn't have a car, so ignore the section about car-sharing, since
obviously you can't share a car you can't drive. But the rest of it is
pretty relevant, and I found it useful. Ride-sharing and chipping in
gas money or bartering (You could do your laundry at my house, if I
could get a ride to the grocery store once a month when you go).
Another book, "Finding Wheels" (also available from NLS) is intended
more for adolescents with special needs, but I found it relevant to my
life as well. Being independent enought to get places without relying
on your friends or family will make it easier to go wherever you want,
when you want. And your friends will be more likely to give you a ride
if it's not every time you want to go somewhere.

My two cents,
Jewel

On 5/12/10, Ashley  Bramlett <bookwormahb at earthlink.net> wrote:
> Gerardo,
>
> Just like with Carrie's question, you need to decide based on the situation
> and balance independence with help.
>
> 1. If you cannot cut food and you have no other disability you should take
> time to learn.  Ask a friend to show you.  Is there someone you trust in
> your nfb chapter that can show you privately and not gossip?  I could not do
> this for years.  Finally a rehab teacher came to my home and one thing she
> showed me was cutting food.  Would it be possible to get a teacher from the
> department for the blind to help you do such tasks?  Also you may consider a
> center if your skills overall need improvement.
> For now just ask someone to cut your food up that's next to you.
> Did you go away to college?  I wonder how you managed without someone there
> to cut your food?
>
> 2. Regarding rides, yes do ask if you need it.  Your friends don't know your
> needs;
> they may not automatically ask; in other cultures that might be more the
> case but not here.
> Some close friends may offer you a ride though.  If you do ask for rides
> offer something in return such as a meal or paying for gas.
> Also have alternative modes of transit so your friends don't always have to
> pick you up.  What is the public transit like?  Unfortunately in many areas
> of America it has a lot to be desired.  Is there a door to door service for
> people with disabilities?  Here its called metro access.
> For short distances cabs are an option too.
>
> I think getting help is alright but you need a way to do it more
> independently because the same people will not always be there to help you.
> For now I get a lot of rides from family because I'm at home.  When I have a
> job I can afford to move out on my own.  But I also have the door to door
> paratransit service, metro access.
>
> Ashley
>
> ----- Original Message -----
> From: "Gerardo Corripio" <gera1027 at gmail.com>
> To: "BlindStudents" <nabs-l at nfbnet.org>
> Sent: Wednesday, May 12, 2010 11:35 AM
> Subject: [nabs-l] Sociaolizing Part2
>
>
>> Hi guys: More questions:
>> 1.-I unfortunately don't know how to cut food or meat. is it fine to ask
>> whoever is next to me to do the favor without letting them feel like I'm
>> more burden then a regular person?
>> 2.-Regarding rides and the like is it my initiative to ask for it or
>> should
>> my friends offer them when they know I'm blind and don't have a car? For
>> now
>> all but surely more in the days to come.
>> Gerardo
>>
>>
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