[nabs-l] Need more help...Navigating The Football Game Saturday

Thu Nov 11 00:34:58 UTC 2010

Kerry,
I'm not into sports and the few outside games I have been with a sighted 
person.
>From my limited experience crowds at games do the same thing.  They all go 
through security if needed and check in at a ticket counter and proceed to a 
seat.  They mass exit at the end.

What a tough one.  You have to decide if you want to do this alone.  Will 
you really have fun with this anxiety and fear?  I know how you feel because 
its hard for me to make friends too.  I can be intriverted.  Rarely did 
someone ask me to go out and like you during college I missed out on events 
like concerts just because I didn't have anyone to go with.  So
like you I got up the courage to just do more things.   I decided to go 
where I wanted and when.  It helped that I had a great mobility instructor 
at the time who showed me the metro nearest my college and you can get there 
via the campus shuttle.
She also showed me a few places across the street like 711 and restaurants. 
There was a mall nearby to the metro station too.
I usually just went shopping and out to eat and joined a gym.
Like you if I go out to eat, a game, or whatever I don't want it to be to 
take me somewhere I want it to be for social reasons like they would do with 
anyone else.

Anyway, you can either go with your aunt or go alone.  I mean its your aunt 
not your mother.  If you go with your aunt maybe she will let you do some 
things on your own such as buying a beverage at half time or something.

Alternatively go alone.  No don't tell security to follow you.  You could 
introduce yourself to them if you want but don't ask them to help you as I 
think that looks weird to have an escort like that.
Just follow the crowd and ask directions.
For safety bring a cell phone and know who to call if you get stranded or 
something happens.  Don't you have a roommate or neighbor?  Check in with 
them every so often.
Yes you might want to bring a whistle.  If someone grabs you just yell and 
use your whole body to get away if they grab you.  Taking aikido or judo may 
help you learn self defense.
Maybe you could get a police officer to teach you some self defense perhaps. 
I took aikido, a martial art briefly.

Let me try and describe a move.  If your grabbed around the neck you want 
them to let go.
You raise your shoulders and bring both arms out and up.  This forces their 
arms to let go.
Also I'd recommend having two ways to get back home so if one way fails you 
have another.  Have the cab company numbers with you.

Good luck.
Ashley
----- Original Message ----- 
From: "Kerri Kosten" <kerrik2006 at gmail.com>
To: "National Association of Blind Students mailing list" 
<nabs-l at nfbnet.org>; "k-r" <k-r at atlanticbb.net>; "Darren Burton" 
<dburton at afb.net>
Sent: Wednesday, November 10, 2010 5:24 PM
Subject: [nabs-l] Need more help...Navigating The Football Game Saturday

> Hey All:
>
> Sorry to post another message about this but I figured I'd change the
> subject line a little.
>
> As most of you know, yesterday I decided to do the basketball game
> independently and just find a friend for the football game Saturday to
> be on the safe side with such a massive stadium, parking lot area,
> tons of steps everywhere, and all the drunks.
>
> Well, to make a long story short, I can't find anyone to go with.
>
> I honestly don't have very many friends around here. The reasons for
> this are debatable but I think it comes down to the fact that the
> sighted people feel sorry for me, and see me as a child and don't want
> to be "responsible" for me. I don't have that forward-thinking sighted
> person to go to or that cool friend and there aren't any other blind
> people around here.
>
> I called one of the friends I have Loray...but she is working Saturday.
>
> I posted on Facebook yesterday that I have an extra ticket to go to
> the game on the 50 yard line but noone responded. I posted another
> status update earlier today and someone responded asking if I was
> selling the ticket and how much and they may be interested...I
> explained the situation, that the ticket wasn't for sale but I was
> looking for someone to go with because as a female it probably
> wouldn't be the best idea to go alone with all the drunks. The person
> agreed, and asked how I was but did not say anything about going to
> the game with me.
>
> My aunt may be going but heres the thing...I want to be careful with
> who I ask and select to go with. I don't want to just go with someone
> as a tag-along or invite myself into a group or worst of all have
> someone feel sorry for the poor blind girl and take her to the game
> because she doesn't have anyone to go with...and if she doesn't go
> with me how will she go to the game? Poor thing...then the whole time
> ask me about where my mother is, and how my mother should be taking
> me, and so on.
>
> It's my birthday...I want to do this and have fun and I want to go
> with a person who wants to go with me because of me not because they
> feel sorry for the poor blind girl or the poor blind girl doesn't have
> anyone else to go with, or the poor blind girl's mother is too busy
> for her. I try to point out that 'm 23 years old and don't need my
> mother and they say "I know," but it infuriates me.
>
> So, what should I do if I don't end up finding someone to go with?
>
> This not getting to do things because of not having people to do
> things has gone on long enough. As of a couple of months ago I decided
> enough was enough, and to stop feeling sorry for myself, and that from
> now on I would do what I wanted when I wanted whether I had people to
> go with or not.
>
> So far, until this football game I've been doing pretty well.
>
> I have already missed out on several festivals here and a concert that
> was held here featuring Maroon 5, Ludacris, and Kris Allen (Maroon 5
> is one of my favorite artists and I love Ludacris) because of not
> having people to go with and being afraid to go because of being a
> female with all the rowdy drunks.
>
> I want to show these feel sorry people that I don't need them, and
> that I do what I want when I want whether they want to take me or not,
> and that my mother doesn't need to be around...I don't want my
> birthday to be ruined too and not get to go to something I want
> because of stupid people!
>
> I don't need these people...I'm determined to show them and overcome
> this...but I want to be safe too and keep what Kimberly said in her
> message yesterday in mind.
>
> If I don't end up finding anybody and have to do it alone would it be
> best  to do the call ahead, have someone from security help me to my
> seat then help me out of the stadium afterwords? Would that be safe
> enough?
>
> I love the idea of gong to the stadium to check things out on a day
> when the fans are not there...but this is the last of two home games
> so this will most likely be the only football game I go to.
>
> I have to pick up my ticket for the basketball game so I definitely
> will check out that areena but I don't know if I'll get to check out
> the football stadium before Saturday.
>
> What to do?
>
> Thanks so much,
>
> Kerri
>
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