[nabs-l] Security in ourselves, acceptance in others

Mike Freeman k7uij at panix.com
Sat May 28 16:16:40 UTC 2011


Darian:

Ask Primo Foyanini (if he's still alive) about being beaten up by a janitor
at a Utah sheltered shop because he was/is a Federationist? While perhaps
not in the same league as Rodney King, the beating *did* result in
hospitalization. If you can find it, listen to the 1981 presidential Report.

Mike


-----Original Message-----
From: nabs-l-bounces at nfbnet.org [mailto:nabs-l-bounces at nfbnet.org] On Behalf
Of Darian Smith
Sent: Saturday, May 28, 2011 8:54 AM
To: National Association of Blind Students mailing list
Subject: Re: [nabs-l] Security in ourselves, acceptance in others

I think I understand what you both are communicating.
 I don't believe (nor am I terribly sure that either Mike or Briley are
actually saying)  that there is a close comparison so much to we as blind
people and  the african/black american expirience in this nation.  I just
feel like we, as blind people will find a difficult time finding our own
versions of  Rodney King Or Oscar Grant, that would clearly underscore  the
same  emotions, concerns and the like that as an ethnic grou  blacks face.
So in a way, I  wonder if we arn't  approachingan "apples and Oranges"
situation?
 Best,
  Darian

On 5/28/11, Briley Pollard <brileyp at gmail.com> wrote:
> I think it is not always an appropriate comparison to say our struggle 
> for civil rights isn't completely parallel with the black American 
> experience, but we have struggled for civil rights. Go read some 
> history on how blind people have been treated by families and 
> institutions over the years. Blind children were targets for sexual 
> assault in extremely high numbers because they were considered to be 
> vulnerable. They were placed in horrific living conditions throughout 
> history in institutions because families believed that blindness was 
> equal to ineffectiveness, and that they'd never be able to succeed or 
> help out their relatives. As a people group, we have suffered many 
> indignities that I don't think the current generation of blind people even
come close to realizing.
>
> Best,
> Briley
> On May 28, 2011, at 1:23 AM, Darian Smith wrote:
>
>> Mike:
>> African-Americans/blacks (however one choosses to term 
>> themselves)would not have been too keen on the idea based upon how 
>> they were treated by whites  up to that time.
>>  It is curious that how    african-americans were treated is always
>> one of the first ways we as blind  people choose to make our 
>> comparisons in our struggle  for first-class citizanship.  I wonder, 
>> were blind people  beatin and hosed down when they peacefully protest 
>> the unjust ways they were treated? Were  they lybnched?  Can we 
>> safely make those  comparisons?  unless  I am missing something (I 
>> could be, and it wouldn't be the first or last time I have), we  have 
>> some similarities with regards to civil rights, but largely our 
>> histories were quite different and  the scars, deaths,risks were felt 
>> on largely different levels.
>> Just  some thoughts on  the matter,and I very much appreciate the 
>> question.
>>  Respectfully,
>>  Darian
>>
>> On 5/26/11, Mike Freeman <k7uij at panix.com> wrote:
>>> Darian:
>>>
>>> What do  you think African-americans would have said during the 
>>> 1950's and 1960's had one of their number said he/she would rather 
>>> date a Caucasian person because of the concern for two black persons 
>>> dating?
>>>
>>> Mike
>>>
>>>
>>> -----Original Message-----
>>> From: nabs-l-bounces at nfbnet.org [mailto:nabs-l-bounces at nfbnet.org] 
>>> On Behalf Of Darian Smith
>>> Sent: Thursday, May 26, 2011 5:49 PM
>>> To: National Association of Blind Students mailing list
>>> Subject: Re: [nabs-l] Security in ourselves, acceptance in others
>>>
>>> Jedi,
>>>  Sure-let me see...
>>> We as federationests have certain ways that we like to deal with 
>>> situations, ways that we see life or phrase things in life. For 
>>> example We like to use  the term "blind"  as opposed to "visually 
>>> impaired" or any variant there of. We also like if a person uses 
>>> products with Braille  on them (braille watches, braille compass, 
>>> braille books and the like, but somehow we tend to make people who 
>>> don't utilize these things seem lesser for not.
>>>  I have a friend who would much rather date a sighted  gentleman 
>>> than a blind gentleman because she is concerned about the idea of 
>>> two blind people dating.
>>>  Personally I may feel a certain way about  these things, but I 
>>> would like to think that  it's  huge to  consider where each person 
>>> is in
>>> their life and  accept them into the  fold as they are.    I am fine
>>> with educatinn,  so long as  we arn't critical and that we are 
>>> accepting, because  seems to me that weas people hate to be told that we
are "wrong"
>>> for thinking like we do.
>>>  Does that make sense?
>>>  Respecgfully,
>>>  Darian
>>>
>>>
>>> On 5/26/11, Darian Smith <dsmithnfb at gmail.com> wrote:
>>>> Very good points.
>>>>  We as blind people are a minority, and I think it's  good to 
>>>> remember that  there are other minorities out there.  How does one 
>>>> member of a minority group address another member of that same 
>>>> group if they don't feel that this person is acting like they 
>>>> should in public?  Don't feel like this person is projecting a 
>>>> positive image of the rest of that group to society?
>>>>    I believe that we all face that problem and how we deal with it
>>>> varies, but I would hope that we know enough to not  take  it   upon
>>>> ourselves to change the worlds opinions.  I think we can model  
>>>> that positive image that is with in our grasp to become, that 
>>>> probably is the  healthiest way to approach this  idea of 
>>>> perception-changing that we  think about alot,  Does that make sense?
>>>>  thoughts?
>>>>
>>>> On 5/26/11, Jedi <loneblindjedi at samobile.net> wrote:
>>>>> Excellent points.
>>>>>
>>>>> I'm going to add to that some.
>>>>>
>>>>> I've noticed that we also tend to judge a person's actions when 
>>>>> they attempt to handle a vexing situation like overhelpfulness or 
>>>>> discrimination. I've been doing some research on the effects of 
>>>>> such judgment and have concluded that it creates an invisible 
>>>>> audience for the blind person in question. This audience is made 
>>>>> of both the blind and the sighted community and creates thoughts 
>>>>> like "What will my blind friends and colleagues think of me if I react
this or that way?
>>>>> What will the sighted person I'm talking to think? What will 
>>>>> sighted bystanders think?" What this does is create a win/lose 
>>>>> situation where the stakes are high. Aside from causing stress 
>>>>> that limits problem-solving ability, this high stakes situation 
>>>>> also creates a greater likelihood of negative response to 
>>>>> perceived threats to the blind person's self-concept and sense of
efficacy in the interaction.
>>>>> So for example, an overly helpful person might cause a blind 
>>>>> person to feel ineffective as it is. But the invisible audience 
>>>>> concept boosts that feeling considerably because of the stress 
>>>>> involved with feeling like they have to show themselves as both 
>>>>> effective and graceful in handling both the offers of help and the 
>>>>> person who's offering it. Is any of this making sense? So the 
>>>>> bottom line is that by trying to be the perfect ambassador for the 
>>>>> blind, we may be shooting ourselves in the foot by creating such a 
>>>>> high stakes situation in our mind that the stress lowers our 
>>>>> ability to present the cool, calm, and effective image we want to
offer to the public.
>>>>>
>>>>> On that note, I've noticed that our community seems to have it in 
>>>>> our heads that we're responsible for how the sighted feel about 
>>>>> us. The truth is that there are limits to that responsibility. 
>>>>> Sure, we want to set a good impression in all areas, but so does 
>>>>> everyone else. The sad truth is that we are judged based on the
actions of one person.
>>>>> But the thing is, there's nothing that we can really do about that 
>>>>> except to expose a given sighted person to the diversity of our 
>>>>> population. Even if we set the perfect impression, it's likely 
>>>>> that the sighted person will still stereotype by saying that we're 
>>>>> all amazing or that the one individual in question is the 
>>>>> exception to a rule. It seems to me that the only people who 
>>>>> really get that we're as diverse as they are are those who know 
>>>>> how to deconstruct society's grand narrative or are those who have 
>>>>> seen enough diversity in our population to realize that they can't 
>>>>> judge all of us based on one
>>> person.
>>>>>
>>>>> Respectfully,
>>>>> Jedi
>>>>>
>>>>> Original message:
>>>>>> That makes perfect sense, but we should not fall into the trap of 
>>>>>> taking responsibility for others' actions. When we do that, we 
>>>>>> lose sight of our own goals and direction in life. Unless you're 
>>>>>> a therapist, or a rehab teacher working with people like that, it 
>>>>>> is not your job to fix them. Even as a therapist or teacher, your 
>>>>>> place is to be a mentor and an instructor. As I previously said, 
>>>>>> if that person, after being shown compassion and alternative ways 
>>>>>> of thinking, doing and living chooses to fall back into old 
>>>>>> patterns as soon as the instructor's back is turned, that shows a 
>>>>>> lack of respect for everyone around them, including themselves. 
>>>>>> So if a person wants to wallow in misery and self-pity, let them! 
>>>>>> That person will either fall hard when they find out their 
>>>>>> parents/family members/significant other or what have you can't 
>>>>>> take care of them forever, and then they'll realize what needs to 
>>>>>> happen in due time, or they will get sick of the status quo and 
>>>>>> want to change it. And if people hold it against a decent blind 
>>>>>> person because they've met a person like that in the past, it's 
>>>>>> not worth it to try and make them feel any differently. They will 
>>>>>> either come around in time or they
>>> won't. Choice is the key word here.
>>>>>> Everyone is free to think as they choose so long as it's not 
>>>>>> hurting anyone. So, while it might temporarily sting a bit to 
>>>>>> lose out on a potential friendship due to someone's ignorance, as 
>>>>>> soon as you meet someone who's worth your time, you forget about 
>>>>>> that other person real quick
>>>>>
>>>>>> On 5/26/11, Daniel Romero <djdan567 at gmail.com> wrote:
>>>>>>> I think the reason why this might go down is because of the view 
>>>>>>> that we get from the public in general. Most people who are 
>>>>>>> sighted are not used to a blind person. You have to understand 
>>>>>>> that one blind person being seen is a huge thing. They're now 
>>>>>>> reliable for what a person thinks about blind people. They are 
>>>>>>> the ones setting an example. So if you have a blind person who 
>>>>>>> smells bad, rocks, pokes their eyes or just do not have the 
>>>>>>> proper skills, the outside person will make an assumtion and say 
>>>>>>> that all blind people are like that. i'm not saying it's right 
>>>>>>> for blind people to call out other blind people with a skills 
>>>>>>> set that is lower then theirs, they're just calling them out 
>>>>>>> because they are representing blind people. It puts a bad label 
>>>>>>> on us blind people who do take care of ourselves, have the 
>>>>>>> skills to be independent and succeed. like i said, i'm not 
>>>>>>> saying it's right but I don't think us who do have the skills 
>>>>>>> want to have a negative conotation. Not all blind people poke 
>>>>>>> their eyes, rock, hop, twitch,bump into everything, smell bad, 
>>>>>>> do not clean their own clothes, or anything like that. So to be 
>>>>>>> part of a group that's going to display such a view that is negative
to the public, we fall right behind that. Am I making sense?
>>>>>
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>>>>>
>>>>>
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>>>>>> jed
>>>>>> i%40samobile.net
>>>>>
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>>>>>
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>>>>
>>>>
>>>> --
>>>> Darian Smith
>>>> Skype: The_Blind_Truth
>>>> Windows Live: Lightningrod2010 at live.com Follow me on twitter:
>>>> http://twitter.com/goldengateace
>>>>
>>>> "The purpose of life is a life of purpose.
>>>>
>>>> - Robert Byrne
>>>>
>>>
>>>
>>> --
>>> Darian Smith
>>> Skype: The_Blind_Truth
>>> Windows Live: Lightningrod2010 at live.com Follow me on twitter: 
>>> http://twitter.com/goldengateace
>>>
>>> "The purpose of life is a life of purpose.
>>>
>>> - Robert Byrne
>>>
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>>
>>
>> --
>> Darian Smith
>> Skype: The_Blind_Truth
>> Windows Live: Lightningrod2010 at live.com Follow me on twitter: 
>> http://twitter.com/goldengateace
>>
>> "The purpose of life is a life of purpose.
>>
>> - Robert Byrne
>>
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--
Darian Smith
Skype: The_Blind_Truth
Windows Live: Lightningrod2010 at live.com
Follow me on twitter: http://twitter.com/goldengateace

"The purpose of life is a life of purpose.

- Robert Byrne

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