[nabs-l] food courts and counter restaurants

[Kirt Manwaring]

Ashley,
  I think most of us have experienced this frustration, to a certain
degree.  We all have our own ways of dealing with it; I'll tell you
what I try and do because, mostly, it works for me.  I'm not trying to
shove "rebellious independence" down your throat, I'm not saying what
works for me will necessarily work for you, but I am saying that I've
learned I don't need to have someone there every step of the way
guiding me.
  First, I like to hold my tray in one hand and my cane in the other.
This takes practice, I'm still not a pro at it, but after learning and
trying the technique for a while I've figured out how to hold a tray,
a drink, and a cane all fairly comfortably.  LIke I said, it takes
some getting used to and it doesn't come over night; it took months at
a training center for me to become halfway competent doing it, but it
works for me.  This does, however, mean I'm not taking somebody's arm
if I'm doing it that way.  Of course I have someone help me get my
dang drink when I order (I suppose I could just randomly test all the
drinks until I stumbled upon the right one, but I'm having a hard time
fathoming why the hell anybody would want to do that), but I don't
really have to go that far out of the way.  In fact, most of the time,
the person behind the counter offers to just take my drink and fill it
for me; I usually politely refuse and ask the kindhearted worker to
show me what button I have to push to get the drink I want.  In the
rare event the cashier just hands me my cup without offering to help
(very rare indeed), I listen to where I hear ice clinking in to cups
and walk over that way.  Nine times out of ten, (maybe even nineteen
out of twenty) someone is there and I can just ask that person to help
me know what drink is what.
  As for finding a table, I often just walk around until I bump in to
one with my cane.  I can usually hear where people are sitting and
eating, so I'm not just wandering aimlessly.  If I can't find one (or
if someone finds me first), I'll ask to be pointed towards an empty
table and I'll walk in the direction I'm pointed until I find a place
to sit.  If someone decides to grab me and take me to an open seat,
I'll either make a fool of myself telling the person I'm really ok and
I can find it or, sometimes, I just ask them to walk a couple steps in
front of me and guide me that way.  I usually don't like someone
taking my arm unless that person is a close friend who I know I can
trust; there are, however, a few acceptions to this rule.  (I just
showed up to the airport with minutes to spare before my flight home;
I had no problem taking the arm of a stranger because I didn't know
the area and I didn't have the time to figure it out.)
  As far as asking for help goes, I do it all the time!  Usually, if
I'm eating a meal in a food court by myself and I'm done, I'll try and
find somebody if I couldn't hear people throwing things away.  (most
of the time I can't; I'm not that skilled yet! :))  Anyways, that
person could either be someone I hear talking at a table or someone
behind the counter at a restaurant.  I'll say something like "would
you mind pointing me to the nearest garbage?"  If they offer to take
my trash for me, I usually thank them and let them take it.  If they
do what I asked and point me, then off I go, usually with people
giving me directions as I go if I can't find the dang thing.  (which
is happening less and less, thanks to some fantastic training.)
  But, most importantly, don't stress about it!  If you feel really
awkward, chances are it'll show and the people around you will feel
even more awkward in kind.  If, however, you are confident and
enjoying yourself, however you choose to do it, people will generally
be more responsive and helpful.
  Oh, one last thing that I learned in training.  (I feel like an
idiot for not thinking of this before)  If you aren't sure where
someone is directing you, point to where you think it is.  That way
people will be able to confirm that you are right or just move your
hand so you're pointing in the right way.  That also works, sometimes,
when people seem to not feel comfortable giving you directions.
Simply point somewhere (even somewhere random if you have no clue) and
ask, with a smile, "you mean that way?"  Then, all of a sudden, people
know how to explain it to you.
  I hope I'm not coming off as dedactic or self-rightious.  I don't
intend to.  I guess alll I'm trying to say is I've found a way that
works for me, find one that works for you (whatever it is)and enjoy
yourself!  That is, after all, the point.  Right?
  Best,
Kirt

On 8/12/12, David Dodge <daviddod at buffalo.edu> wrote:
> It makes a great deal of sense. However, I would argue that immediate help
> is rarely as valuable or enduring as that help which takes time.
>
> David
> ----------------------------------
> David Dodge
> Diversity in Disability Planning Committee Chairperson
> English Major
> University at Buffalo
> 306 Clemens Hall
> Buffalo, NY 14260
> daviddod at buffalo.edu
>
>
> On Sun, Aug 12, 2012 at 8:37 PM, Carly Mihalakis
> <carlymih at comcast.net>wrote:
>
>> Hi, David,
>>
>> It is true, we do help  when we are able, like by widening people's
>> threshholds, and convictions, and expanding what is believed to be
>> possible, yet, the ways in which we are able to help, often are not as
>> immediate as the kind of momentary,  on-the-spot,help from which we are
>> likely to benefit. Does that happened to make any kind of sense?wrote:
>>
>>> Thanks, Carly. But, I would even say our chances to help others are more
>>> than just few. Everyone has talents and knowledge and we are responsible
>>> for using them to help ourselves and others just like anyone else.
>>>
>>> David
>>> ------------------------------**----
>>> David Dodge
>>> Diversity in Disability Planning Committee Chairperson
>>> English Major
>>> University at Buffalo
>>> 306 Clemens Hall
>>> Buffalo, NY 14260
>>> daviddod at buffalo.edu
>>>
>>>
>>> On Sun, Aug 12, 2012 at 8:10 PM, Carly Mihalakis <carlymih at comcast.net
>>> >wrote:
>>>
>>> > Glad to see David's approach to giving, and receiving, assistance
>>> > seems
>>> a
>>> > bit healthier. Because, it is true, Ashley, in cases in which we are
>>> able
>>> > to help which granted, are few, we do it gladly. When sighted people
>>> > see
>>> > the blind person struggling o do what he routinely takes for granted,
>>> > instinctively, a first thing they wanna do is lend a hand. It's part
>>> > of
>>> > being a member of society.
>>> > Fact is, you are lacking same access to the senses as everyone else,
>>> > that's a fact. So, one would argue, there's nothing whatsoever wrong
>>> with
>>> > accepting help, once in a while. Remember, ol' Sighty cares not about
>>> your
>>> > motives for proving yourself by being completely, solo in this here
>>> world.
>>> > Dodge wrote:
>>> >
>>> >> Try to feel grateful and not bad about asking people for help when
>>> >> they
>>> >> give it to you. After all, people ask you for help in different
>>> situations
>>> >> and you kindly give it to them too right?
>>> >>
>>> >> David
>>> >> ------------------------------****----
>>> >> David Dodge
>>> >> Diversity in Disability Planning Committee Chairperson
>>> >> English Major
>>> >> University at Buffalo
>>> >> 306 Clemens Hall
>>> >> Buffalo, NY 14260
>>> >> daviddod at buffalo.edu
>>> >>
>>> >>
>>> >> On Sun, Aug 12, 2012 at 7:33 PM, Ashley Bramlett
>>> >> <bookwormahb at earthlink.net>****wrote:
>>> >>
>>> >> > true, I find other customers help me. I kind of feel bad about
>>> >> > asking
>>> >> > though and like it when they ask me first.
>>> >> > I feel by asking, I'm kind of obligating them to help before going
>>> >> > to
>>> >> > their table or carrying their food away.
>>> >> > Oh, well, I need the help.
>>> >> >
>>> >> >
>>> >> > -----Original Message----- From: Carly Mihalakis
>>> >> > Sent: Sunday, August 12, 2012 7:23 PM
>>> >> > To: National Association of Blind Students mailing list ; National
>>> >> > Association of Blind Students mailing list
>>> >> > Subject: Re: [nabs-l] food courts and counter restaurants
>>> >> >
>>> >> > Hi, Ashley,
>>> >> >
>>> >> >         If the personel behind the counter are
>>> >> > too busy to help, other customers are often also
>>> >> > more than happy to grab you a napkin or throw
>>> >> > away your garbage./12/2012, Ashley Bramlett wrote:
>>> >> >
>>> >> >> Hi carley, In food courts, that is not always my experience.
>>> >> >> Perhaps
>>> >> its
>>> >> >> where I live. Like you, I may plan ahead about the menu thing. For
>>> the
>>> >> >> drinks thing, they do help me if I ask for it, but they seem busy
>>> and
>>> >> I may
>>> >> >> have to wait a few minutes. The staff are busy taking orders,
>>> filling
>>> >> them,
>>> >> >> and taking money from customers. Often, they just seem too busy to
>>> help
>>> >> >> out; so, a friendly customer in line offers to assist me and I
>>> >> >> take
>>> it.
>>> >> >> They read the drink options and I pick one I want. Some places
>>> >> >> have
>>> >> bottle
>>> >> >> drinks and I find these easier. In this case, they can just hand
>>> >> >> me
>>> the
>>> >> >> bottle as they hand me the food too. I'm glad you have found the
>>> staff
>>> >> >> helpful because they should be as an accomodation. Ashley
>>> -----Original
>>> >> >> Message----- From: Carly Mihalakis Sent: Sunday, August 12, 2012
>>> 7:02
>>> >> PM
>>> >> >> To: National Association of Blind Students mailing list Subject:
>>> >> >> Re:
>>> >> >> [nabs-l] food courts and counter restaurants Hi, Ashley, If I know
>>> >> >> I
>>> >> will
>>> >> >> be visiting a particular restaurant who has their menu Online, I
>>> >> definitely
>>> >> >> read it, selecting what sounds good ahead of time. If such a menu
>>> >> >> is
>>> >> not
>>> >> >> available I just ask the folks behind the counter, or on the floor
>>> to
>>> >> read
>>> >> >> it. As for the food court, the host personnel who seat me, are
>>> usually
>>> >> more
>>> >> >> than happy to help out by carrying, even getting the drink. After
>>> all,
>>> >> >> that's what there there for right? CarHi all, Food courts are
>>> crowded
>>> >> noisy
>>> >> >> places. They hand you the food on a tray. But often the customer
>>> >> >> has
>>> >> to get
>>> >> >> their own drink from a row of drink spickits. I am talking about
>>> >> >> the
>>> >> row of
>>> >> >> them where the cups are at the end and the drinks are gotten by
>>> >> pressing
>>> >> >> something to release the liquid. So any tips on them?  How do you
>>> deal
>>> >> with
>>> >> >> these drink areas? Does someone help you? I suppose you could
>>> memorize
>>> >> it
>>> >> >> if you went there before. How do you find an empty table since
>>> >> >> your
>>> >> hands
>>> >> >> are full with the tray, unless you ask someone to carry it for
>>> >> >> you.
>>> >> Then,
>>> >> >> how do you find the trashcan? Do you explore where the trashcans
>>> >> >> are
>>> >> before
>>> >> >> you get your food? Do you ask someone to read the menu to you
>>> >> >> while
>>> in
>>> >> >> line, or do it beforehand? Some venues have their menu online
>>> >> >> which
>>> I
>>> >> use
>>> >> >> if possible; other times they don̢۪t. Next, how do you deal with
>>> >> >> restestaurants requiring you to order at the counter and pick it
>>> >> >> up
>>> at
>>> >> the
>>> >> >> counter? A fast food place usually gives you the food right there
>>> >> >> at
>>> >> the
>>> >> >> counter. You do not  sit and wait. So that isn̢۪t an issue. If I
>>> >> have to
>>> >> >> say, waiwait for fries, I do so right at the counter, as anyone
>>> >> >> else
>>> >> would.
>>> >> >> Restaurants where you do this include: Johnny Rockets in some
>>> locations
>>> >> >> deli places such as Philadelphia mikes Fudruckers Corner Bakery
>>> >> >> How
>>> do
>>> >> you
>>> >> >> find the counter and locate your seat? For me, I̢۪m not good at
>>> >> >> revreversing routes, and all tables look the same! I̢۪m am
>>> >> >> asking
>>> >> since I
>>> >> >> may order at such a restaurant with a blind friend and could use
>>> some
>>> >> tips
>>> >> >> on this. Thanks. Ashley ______________________________****
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