[nabs-l] Mentoring a younger student; when enough is enough

Tue Feb 11 16:19:06 UTC 2014

Hi, everyone.
Regarding Kaiti's question about the tour, I think I might have an answer.
I'm not sure if the mobility instructor is or is not taking the initiative
and helping with the tour, but they might have the mind-set that a student
giving the tour would be more beneficial since that student is the one who
attends that school on a daily basis. Heck, when Lillie was starting high
school, I offered to walk around with her and our O&M instructor one of the
first times she visited the building. I was really excited to show her some
of the routes I took, introduce her to teachers, and the like. Besides, I
knew my sister wouldn't turn into some crazy stalker chick. Haha. At any
rate, I agree with everything that's been said: you can help this girl, but
it's not your job to serve as TVI, O&M instructor, teacher, and so on and so
forth.

Emily

-----Original Message-----
From: nabs-l [mailto:nabs-l-bounces at nfbnet.org] On Behalf Of Joshua
Hendrickson
Sent: Tuesday, February 11, 2014 9:38 AM
To: National Association of Blind Students mailing list
Subject: Re: [nabs-l] Mentoring a younger student; when enough is enough

Hi Katy and all.  I completely agree with you.  I hope you didn't let that
girl use your notetaker when she forgot hers at home.  That wasn't your
fault.  The girl should have gotten all hjer school stuff ready the night
before so she didn't forget anything.  I also agree about getting your
parents or O-M instructor to help get you oriented when it comes to figuring
out your classes.  My mom used to run through with me my class schedule for
each semester of college all the time.  Granted, I didn't always pay as
close attention as I should have, but that was my fault.  The older I get,
the more I learn how importatant it is to learn your routes to your classes
as soon as you can, and as well as you can.  The sooner you can find your
way to your classes the better off you'll be.  This will give you much
needed independence and help you in the long run.  Good luck to Lily and the
rest of you in your schooling.  I just received my associates degree a
couple weeks ago.

On 2/11/14, Kaiti Shelton <crazy4clarinet104 at gmail.com> wrote:
> Hi all,
>
> I totally agree.  You come first, so do what you can to be helpful but 
> not at the expense of your academics or other school-related 
> obligations.
>
> As competent blind students we often are asked to help those students 
> who are younger, could use more independence skills, etc.  I've been 
> asked to do it several times with several students in my school 
> district as well, and the requests have ranged from reasonable things 
> like braille tutoring and understanding tactile diagrams when the 
> student came from a school district with really horrible VI services, 
> to absurd things that jeopardized my schooling.  Heck, one time 
> another girl in my school forgot her notetaker on the day of a state 
> exam, so I was asked to give her mine and go through my classes 
> without access to my notes or textbook files.  Helping is not truly 
> helping if it is at anyone's expense.
>
> I do have one question though.  I may just not understand because I 
> was always either the only blind kid in my school, or the oldest one 
> without multiple disabilities, but why exactly does the VI want you to 
> give the tour?  I can see why she might want to connect the two of 
> you, but I personally have always done campus orientations and run 
> through my class schedule with my mobility instructor or my parents 
> once it became silly to call in the instructor when my mom and I could 
> get it done in 15 minutes.  I'm just curious as to why the mobility 
> instructor who's job it is to familiarize this student with a new 
> school layout isn't involved in this, or if he isn't for some good 
> reason why her parents aren't taking initiative.
>
> On 2/11/14, Ryan Silveira <ryan.l.silveira at gmail.com> wrote:
>> Hi Lillie,
>>
>> I agree with what has been said thus far.  The only thing I would add 
>> to the above advice would be that, when you have the conversation 
>> with the TVI and the other girl's para, make sure that you convey the 
>> message that you are perfectly willing to help out, but that the 
>> student is not your responsibility.  The other thing would be just to 
>> be careful giving out your contact information.  This girl may 
>> somehow think you're her "BFF" and want to constantly hang out with 
>> you--I've seen it happen to some friends, so it's just something to 
>> watch out for.  Hope this helps.
>>
>> Ryan
>>
>> On 2/11/14, Joshua Hendrickson <louvins at gmail.com> wrote:
>>> Hi Lily.  I would tell your VI teacher, that you don't mind helping 
>>> out htis student a little if your schedule per mits.  But, you don't 
>>> want to hinder your schooling, if helping this student is going to 
>>> be difficult because of having a lot of class work ETC.  It also 
>>> really depends on the student and if they genuinely accept your help 
>>> if you offer it.  When I was in college, a blind girl I knew called 
>>> my house and asked me if I could show her a couple routes on campus 
>>> that she was having trouble with.  The next day, I waited for her to 
>>> meet me where we had discussed so we could go the couple routes, and 
>>> she never showed up.  This happened another time as well.  If this 
>>> new student accepts your helping, just showing them a couple things 
>>> might be ok, but again, it really depends on them.
>>>
>>> On 2/11/14, Lillie Pennington <lilliepennington at fuse.net> wrote:
>>>> Thank you both.
>>>> I basically plan on waiting and seeing what happens with the tour. 
>>>> I also asked my vi when it was mentioned to have her write me a 
>>>> list of questions so I can gauge her position. I will also make 
>>>> sure she has my contact information so she can ask more questions 
>>>> at
>>>>
>>>> Sent from my iPhone
>>>>
>>>>> On Feb 11, 2014, at 12:26 AM, Darian <dsmithnfb at gmail.com> wrote:
>>>>>
>>>>> Hi Lilly,
>>>>> I think the easiest thing to do is to just have that conversation.
>>>>> Think that it is okay to have a conversation with your teacher 
>>>>> that says that you are happy to show them around campus, (You were 
>>>>> once the one who was trying to figure out campus) but that because 
>>>>> of your schedule, you will be unable to do anything else beyond 
>>>>> that.
>>>>> I'm sure that your teacher will understand.
>>>>> Hope that helps,
>>>>> Darian
>>>>>
>>>>> This electronic message has been brought to you by my mobile device.
>>>>>
>>>>>> On Feb 10, 2014, at 9:17 PM, Lillie Pennington 
>>>>>> <lilliepennington at fuse.net> wrote:
>>>>>>
>>>>>>
>>>>>>
>>>>>> Hello all
>>>>>> I know my subject and message may sound heartless, and I apologize.
>>>>>> There is a blind student a few years younger than me in my school 
>>>>>> district that will be attending my high school next year. I have 
>>>>>> helped this student by serving as a guide in going to middle 
>>>>>> school programs.
>>>>>> My
>>>>>> vi asked if I would do a tour of the high school and answer 
>>>>>> questions.
>>>>>> This is fine with me.
>>>>>> My fear is that I will be asked to help with some sort of 
>>>>>> tutoring. I do not feel I can do this. This student has multiple 
>>>>>> disabilities, I am not a teacher, and I will have a rigorous 
>>>>>> class schedule plus dealing with responsibilities with junior 
>>>>>> year. I have mentioned this to my parents and parra, who i feel 
>>>>>> are supporting me. However, I am afraid my vi will not understand 
>>>>>> my reasons or misconstrue them for me being rude, which I do not 
>>>>>> want to do. I do not want to say this to early and be 
>>>>>> presumptuous, but I do not want to be misleading. Thank you for 
>>>>>> any advice.
>>>>>> _______________________________________________
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>>>>>
>>>>> _______________________________________________
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>>>>> on%40fuse.net her leisure. I am just afraid my vi will not 
>>>>> understand my scheduling problems since he is kind of out of the 
>>>>> loop with my scheduling and classes, or that I need additional 
>>>>> help with time management and such.
>>>>
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>>
>>
>> --
>> Ryan L. Silveira
>>
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>
>
> --
> Kaiti
>
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