[nabs-l] Blindness and body contact

[Katie Wang]

Hi Arielle and all,

I have definitely had similar experiences with strangers and
acquaintances, and I too find such uninvited physical contact to be
quite uncomfortable. I would usually try to shift my body or take a
few steps away from the person - This usually gets the message across,
though I often find it somewhat awkward especially if the person in
question is  a family friend or distant relative (as it was in your
case). While I obviously can't speak to the motivation behind this
type of behaviors, I would venture to guess that this has something to
do with sighted people's tendency to treat blind people like children.
Given that people generally find it acceptable to ruffle a little
kid's hair or give him/her a hug, It seems that some sighted people
feel it's OK to do the same with those who are blind. It is also
possible that some sighted people are unsure about how to communicate
with us - Given that we can't see their facial expressions, they might
assume that the only way to let us know they are happy to see us/like
something we did is to use physical contact. Just my thoughts!

Katie


On 10/15/14, Carly Mihalakis via nabs-l <nabs-l at nfbnet.org> wrote:
> Good morning, Arielle,
> -American studies class at the local junior college, the instructor
> much to my appreciation would engage my body in much a same way as
> you described while talking to me, AI must say it made me feel like
> teach was particularly engaged with me as well as the subject matter
> at hand. So, I dug it, would look forward to our chats.
> I'm talking also, totally non-sexual and  non-erotic, just laying a
> hand on my shoulder, arm or hand. I really appreciated it!
> Have a good day, Arielle!
> for today, CCar
>
>          As a matter of fact, one semester, I was taking an Afrikan
> At 09:51 PM 10/14/2014, Arielle Silverman via nabs-l wrote:
>>Hi all,
>>So the feeling faces thread reminded me of something and I'm curious
>>what your experiences are with this kind of thing. My sister got
>>married last weekend and I gave a toast at her rehearsal dinner and a
>>short reading during the ceremony. At the cocktail reception a woman
>>approached me and introduced herself as the aunt of my sister's new
>>husband. She then went on for a while about how beautiful my speeches
>>were. The entire time she had her arm kind of around the side of my
>>back and was stroking my shoulder. It made me a bit uncomfortable
>>because we had just met and I am not a very touchy-feely person except
>>with very close family and friends. This is also not the firsttime
>>people I don't know, or barely know, have interacted with me in this
>>way. I have always wondered if the touching is somehow because of my
>>blindness and if so, why do people feel driven to be so physically
>>affectionate with me? Or, is this a typical way people interact, and
>>being blind my whole life, I just haven't noticed how other people
>>physically interact during conversation? If you guys have experienced
>>this sort of thing, how do you usually respond? I'm not talking about
>>being grabbed by over-helpful people; I'm talking about people making
>>physical (nonsexual) contact during a conversation. And not just the
>>occasional shoulder tap, but something more hug-like.
>>Best,
>>Arielle
>>
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