[nabs-l] Problems with grocery shopping

wmodnl wmodnl wmodnl at hotmail.com
Sun Feb 15 17:38:37 UTC 2015


Sometimes, make small talk with them. Sometimes, some people do things b/c they may like you, etc. That was the case in my situation once. We had a similar situation as you described in both situations. At one point, the individual assisting me came out later after we exchanged numbers and agreed to meet-up and said that, they liked my voice and liked that, I gave them something constructive to do. One lap- dance later, after dinner and ya know I forgot about their miss-haps, etc.  We ended up agreeing to a hit and quit (mutually a one-night stand), b/c, we knew that, it would not go anywhere really; but, it was all good. We still talk and stuff, and I helped them get out of an abusive relationship. We now hang out and have drinks sometimes after work.  Have a good one.


Sent from my iPad

> On Feb 9, 2015, at 4:05 PM, Kaiti Shelton via nabs-l <nabs-l at nfbnet.org> wrote:
> 
> Hi, NABSters,
> 
> Lately I've been having some problems when I've been grocery shopping,
> and I'm wondering if any of you who independently shop for your food
> have had similar situations and/or know how to work around them.
> 
> I'm a very detailed shopper.  I make my lists in advance, plan out a
> rough budget, and also organize all the other logistics like
> para-transit in advance.  All last semester I had great success going
> through my local Kroger and found the staff there to be very helpful
> and friendly.  However, over Christmas break I found out that we had a
> Meijer nearby, and I decided to start going there instead for better
> produce and lower prices on some things I was finding pretty expensive
> at Kroger.
> 
> I've been to the Meijer twice now (I go shopping every other weekend)
> and ping on Saturdays at the times of day that I know the store won't
> be as busy, like before 9:00 in the morning or after 7:00 PM.  The
> first time the shopping assistant I had seemed to have very little
> clue as to how to actually help me.  He did not listen to what I
> wanted, sometimes just took off and left me to look for things I said
> I had on my list, and often had to stop other employees and other
> shoppers to ask questions.  He was very confusing to follow, as he
> would just read off everything instead of specifically look for what I
> said I needed.  For example, we came up to the wall of bagged
> vegitables and the dialog went something like this:
> "Okay, now I need chopped salads.  The kind I usually get are by Dole."
> "Okay... chopped salad.  I see carrots, romaine, Spinach..." (he's at
> least a good 4 feet away from me and moving away down the wall.  I
> have enough vision to see more orange from top to bottom, so I know
> he's going towards the bagged carrot sticks and away from the green,
> leafy things.
> "I think it's somewhere around here."
> "Okay" (he comes toward me."  "Dole Romaine, Dole Spinach lettuce."
> "I don't see it."
> Fellow shopper. "The chopped salad is right there.  (Just to his right).
> 
> This happened at the cheese section as well.  He kept talking about 2
> for 5 deals and such randomly, but since he wasn't just looking at the
> types of cheese I needed it was hard to tell what he was talking about
> and gauge what the best value would be.    At one point he assumed
> that I didn't know how to open my box of Oreos I asked for, so when he
> said to give him my hand and I offered it palm up, he flipped it over
> and gave me unsolicited instruction in the art of opening the
> packaging.
> 
> I wasn't rude to this guy, and I assumed that he was a bit off
> probably due to an intellectual disability.  I chalked it up to that,
> and thought that at worst I might want to talk to the manager about
> educating employees on how to properly and politely work with shoppers
> with disabilities (he was also super grabby and wanted me to hold onto
> him even though I repeatedly assured him I could follow behind).
> 
> I went back to the same Meijer on Saturday and got a different
> assistant.  This lady definitely had some disability.  I think it is
> probably Down Syndrome because she had some of the facial features,
> but I can't be sure.  She presented a different host of challenges;
> she definitely knew her way around the store and politely offered her
> arm but did not continue insistently once I declined, and she
> definitely knew her brands.  She also had a much better handle on
> helping me shop efficiently because she knew, "Dairy is a bit off, do
> you have anything like bread on your list we could get on our way?,"
> that the other guy did not.  Instead of taking double the usual time,
> she got me done in half my usual time.  The only problems with her
> were that sometimes she'd get distracted by items I didn't need and I
> would have to redirect her in order to get the information I really
> needed.  When I asked the question out right, not only based on price
> but also size of package which value was better, she had trouble
> answering that question.  Then in checkout she provided unsolicited
> information that wasn't necessarily socially acceptable.  A lady with
> a wheelchair cart was paying for her food in front of us, and the
> shopping assistant turned and said, not all too quietly, "She's paying
> with WIC, and she's got about the whole store on the conveyor belt."
> I felt myself go red because I didn't know what that other woman's
> reaction would be.  Of course I didn't ask her for this information,
> but I really felt bad for the other lady who was probably buying in
> bulk because it was harder for her to get out to shop for a family.  I
> didn't really know how to respond to the shopping assistant, and when
> I was silent for a few seconds she just repeated herself as if I
> didn't hear her.  Then I asked her to take me to a specific bench I
> knew was there while I waited for my ride to come back for pickup, and
> she stuck me in another location which I was less familiar with to
> wait.
> 
> I am all for placing people with any disability in a job, and I
> understand that positions like greeters (like the lady I worked with
> was before she started helping me) are the positions most likely to be
> pulled by customer service to assist shoppers, but how do you work out
> that situation.  The first guy was particularly frustrating because he
> took so long to find simple things and popular brands like Tyson,
> Sargento, and Dole, but on the flip side you had the other lady who
> wasn't a good judge of value and sometimes would talk my ear off as we
> walked and realize some ways off that we missed what we were going
> for.  I applaud Meijer for employing people who can really use the
> work, but I think they need to consider the needs of customers who ask
> for shopping assistance when pairing them up with employees.  If
> people like the first guy are unable to read the expiration dates on
> meats, that's a problem for me.  If I'm trying to save money and I
> can't get a good judge of value, that's also a problem for me.
> 
> Being a major in a field where I'll eventually have clients with all
> sorts of disabilities, I have learned to be very accepting and patient
> in these situations, but when I only have so long to shop before
> para-transit comes back or am trying to stick to a budget the matter
> can be a bit complicated.  When I went shopping with the Oreo guy I
> had to skip a few items on my list in order to check out and be ready
> on time, and I'll confess my patience was wearing a little thin after
> an hour and a half because he was constantly trying to be custodial.
> I just was a little worried about keeping my budget and a little
> socially uncomfortable with the second employee, although I do know
> she tried to be helpful and was for most of the trip.
> 
> I have never had these issues at the other store, so I'm a little
> unsure of how to best proceed should I have this happen again,
> especially with the first guy.  Thoughts?
> 
> It's a tricky situation because
> --
> Kaiti
> 
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