[nagdu] ranting
Tamara Smith-Kinney
tamara.8024 at comcast.net
Wed Oct 21 19:28:20 UTC 2009
Well, it should suffice. But it doesn't always. Sad, but true. So then
you have to figure out a different strategy. With some people, even strong
firmness doesn't work, so you're left with militance. Or, if you're fast on
your feet and willing to go the extra mile, causing the offender public
humiliation can go a long way. /evil grin/
Like you, I am new to blindness. A tad over four years, when it comes to
needing to use adaptive skills more than sight, although I did wear my
glases for another year before they became totally useless. When I stopped
wearing the stupid things was when I started getting The Treatment. I
didn't know people acted like that! Good grief! Also, I couldn't work at
all any longer without adaptive tech, at which point I discovered that the
Oregon Commission for the Blind will go to great lengths to avoid spending
money to keep their clients from working -- even if they already are. So
that created some changes in my life for sure, since I couldn't live where I
was on SSD. Ugh!
So, in the past 4 years, I had two incidents of bullying at work, even when
I was still wearing glasses, since I had to read (the headaches!), while
using my cane and hands for most things. The second time -- same person --
the situation became dangerous and I had to move quick to keep myself from
getting hurt. So I talked to my boss, and my employer took care of the
problem. The same person had nearly pushed a wheelchair user down the
stairs about that time, so that was a no brainer for them!
In the past three years, I have been physically assaulted -- with injuries
requiring extensive medical treatment -- and have found myself dealing with
the most obnoxious rudeness I have encountered in my adult life! Well, the
actual physical assault was from state employees who seem to believe that
physical force is a good way to teach independent living skills while
instilling confidence... I'm not the only one to come out of that program
with injuries to my hands and arms. I used passive self-defense then, but
have since rethought the issue. I have not had to think of self-defense
against physical attack in my adult life, except as a matter of
preparedness, just in case.
Now I'm blathering, but the point is that some people can be just plain ugly
in their dealings with those with obvious disabilities (as they see it).
The vast majority of people aren't that way, of course, though the
percentages vary by culture and geography. If someone cannot see you as a
person, then normal, rational communication gets you exactly nowhere -- or
it even worsens the behavior in the few really bad ones.
Me, I'm polite first, then firm, then -- if I can't simply get away from the
person for some reason, I move on to snarly with attitude.
My poodle guide is a heinous flirt, so I take that into acount, too. Even
on days when she absolutely does *not* want to be touched, she looks people
in the eye and does her grin and flirty dance (I can hear it even when I
can't see her at all; even her feet are expressive). I feel I can't be too
hard on folks when they're getting that kind of come hither, so we do a sort
of controlled greet while I remind Mitzi's new best friend/prisoner that
most guide dog users don't allow petting at all. /smile/ Even with all the
flirt going on, even totally strangers generally ask, and I thank them
profusely for that. So it's all good, and Mitzi can generally get back to
work without a hitch. I start feeling a little frazzled when she really has
her flirt on, though. She's old enough now that I'm started to inhibit it
more, and she is not so distractible. Whew! /grin/
Tami Smith-Kinney
-----Original Message-----
From: nagdu-bounces at nfbnet.org [mailto:nagdu-bounces at nfbnet.org] On Behalf
Of Albert J Rizzi
Sent: Tuesday, October 20, 2009 2:58 PM
To: 'NAGDU Mailing List,the National Association of Guide Dog Users'
Subject: Re: [nagdu] ranting
Well then it is up to each handler to effectively communicate their wishes
effectively, clearly and without confusion. If this is happening in places
she frequents then perhaps she needs to better communicate her wishes to her
immediate circle rather then, as some do, militantly punish the dog for
being a dog, I am on my first dog and refuse to have the type of
relationship with my dog other then one of complete and utter respect. It
is the people who enter our paths who need to be educated which is what I am
doing with my blind spot, perhaps one day this will be a moot point once we
get to be people who happen to be blind rather then that blind person.
Social paradigms need to shift both within the blind and sighted
communities and it is up to us to show others how powerful and integral we
are as a community and how valuable each of us are dog included. So while
you may have taken offense to my use of the word militant I stand by it in
as much as I would like to think that a softer tone and a clearly
communicated directive would and should suffice.
Albert J. Rizzi
CEO/Founder
My Blind Spot, Inc.
90 Broad Street - 18th Fl.
New York, New York 10004
www.myblindspot.org
PH: 917-553-0347
Fax: 212-858-5759
"The person who says it cannot be done, shouldn't interrupt the one who is
doing it."
-----Original Message-----
From: nagdu-bounces at nfbnet.org [mailto:nagdu-bounces at nfbnet.org] On Behalf
Of Linda Gwizdak
Sent: Tuesday, October 20, 2009 4:02 PM
To: NAGDU Mailing List,the National Association of Guide Dog Users
Subject: Re: [nagdu] ranting
Hi Albert,
No, not militant - it's called respecting another person's wishes. In
regards to Dar's problem with people interacting with her dog at church, she
knows her dog and what it can handle. Inhumane??? No, smart. Our dogs are
not pets for the public to play with at will. These are WORKING dogs. All
of my dogs have had their share of attention from their human friends and
they also get to interact with their dog friends.
Landon has many friends who he gets to visit with while off duty. He is a
certified Therapy Dog and we work with wounded warriors as well as adult
daycare, nursing homes, etc. He gets a once-a-month chance to romp with his
guide dog friends in a safe fenced in area..
I don't know how many guide dogs you've had as you are new to the list.
Wwelcome!
I personally let people interact with my dog when appropriate. My dog can
handle it. I do have a friend who's dog is very distractable. If someone
pets his dog he has a tough time in getting his dog back under control and
focused on his work. Dogs differ just as people do.
I'm on my eighth dog and I did have one who I couldn't let people pet
because she would then pay more attention to getting petted rather than her
work.
I think each guide dog handler needs to respected for how they want people
to interact with their dog. they know their dog the best.
Linda and Landon
----- Original Message -----
From: "Albert J Rizzi" <albert at myblindspot.org>
To: "'NAGDU Mailing List,the National Association of Guide Dog Users'"
<nagdu at nfbnet.org>
Sent: Sunday, October 18, 2009 1:50 PM
Subject: Re: [nagdu] ranting
> That seems to be a bit militant and not at all humane. My guide is always
> on point and always is in need of attention and acknowledgement. I do not
> think that there is great risk for danger in a church. Now, pet my dog as
> I
> am crossing a street or on a train platform then I would appreciate your
> position in total. Perhaps next time you get a dog you should request the
> ugliest one possible so that no one would want to pet him or her. They are
> not beasts they are companions without whom we would not get anywhere as
> quickly or as safely as we do. Let them bask in their glory and be
> honored
> for the great work they do, especially in a house of worship. I unlike
> others have utter enjoyment when people appropriately acknowledge
> doxology for the beautiful and competent animal he is.
>
> Albert J. Rizzi
> CEO/Founder
> My Blind Spot, Inc.
> 90 Broad Street - 18th Fl.
> New York, New York 10004
> www.myblindspot.org
> PH: 917-553-0347
> Fax: 212-858-5759
> "The person who says it cannot be done, shouldn't interrupt the one who is
> doing it."
>
>
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: nagdu-bounces at nfbnet.org [mailto:nagdu-bounces at nfbnet.org] On Behalf
> Of Linda Gwizdak
> Sent: Sunday, October 18, 2009 4:28 PM
> To: NAGDU Mailing List,the National Association of Guide Dog Users
> Subject: Re: [nagdu] ranting
>
> Dar, I'd say to the people at church , "You don't like my dog wearing the
> head collar, well, he'll be wearing it as long as you guys keep petting
> him!" So, the people are the meanies who make your dog wear the head
> collar.
>
> If someone says something to me about correcting my dog after they
> distracted him, I just tell them,"What's your fuss about - you caused him
> to
>
> be distracted and I had to correct him".
>
> Linda and Landon
> ----- Original Message -----
> From: "d m gina" <dmgina at samobile.net>
> To: <nagdu at nfbnet.org>
> Sent: Sunday, October 18, 2009 7:32 AM
> Subject: Re: [nagdu] ranting
>
>
>> My boy had to wear his be good collar as I call it.
>> He was visiting on the way up to communion.
>> when he gets so many pets then he thinks he can sniff anyone.
>> when I put it on him, this made folks mad.
>> Whispering,
>> "the dog wasn't doing anything.
>> You correct and the dog is OK.
>> I said out loud he isn't OK.
>> How would they feel if we corrected their children.
>> Trust me, we walked to the stairs and he did his job like he should.
>> He didn't want to visit the dogs on the way home like he does all of the
>> time.
>> He was full business.
>> So I took it off put it back into my fanny pack for next time.
>> Ttrust me I had a dog who was wearing this, and wanted to go to other
>> dogs
>
>> anyway.
>> It didn't matter.
>> The dog jerked out of my hands.
>> I sent the beast back to the school.
>> Wasn't going to put up with that.
>>
>> --
>> --Dar
>> skype
>> dmgina23
>> every saint has a past
>> every sinner has a future
>>
>> Email services provided by the System Access Mobile Network. Visit
>> www.serotek.com to learn more about accessibility anywhere.
>>
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