[nagdu] Get control of that dog

Sat Feb 20 18:29:26 UTC 2010

Wow, lots of things on this topic. Well, first off, Michelle, if
you've explained to the offending party several times what not to do
and they still haven't gotten it, then, IMO, don't ride with them
anymore. If they're your only ride option, then this might be
something to consider.

Next, though this kind of thing hasn't happened to me in a long while,
I did have a police officer of all people grab my dog's leash. For
explanation, this was 13 years ago and shortly after I had fallen from
an unbarracaded ledge on the junior college campus where I was.
Fortunately, a good friend was standing nearby and when the cop
grabbed the leash and then wondered why I gave him a stern look, as
much as I could while my left leg was bent in an awkward angle, my
friend spoke up and politely but firmly told the officer that it's
considered rude to grab onto the leash or harness of a guide dog, to
which he let go. Sure, he was offering his help, but my friend and I
both knew that I wasn't about to give up my dog to someone I didn't
know, even with the circumstances.

I did experience another similar issue but with my cane about 11 years
ago. When coming out of a storewith a bag of purchases, I started to
walk through a parking lot. Someone, which I gradually figured out was
a woman of some age but likely young, then reached out and grabbed my
cane in order to stop me. I kindly pulled my cane back out of her
grasp and politely explained that this was not the best way to try and
redirect me, that instead of grabbing my cane she should talk to me if
she wanted to tell me something. The same series happened a second
time, and I gave the same explanation in a calm but firm voice. When I
stepped forward a third time and she firmly grabbed my cane, I decided
to take a differnet approach, which went something like, "Okay, I can
see that my words aren't making much difference, so let's try this.
How would you feel if I were to do this?" And while i was speaking I
had set my cane down and then reached out with my hand toward where I
thought that she was standing, and gripped her leg. When i asked her
how she would feel if I were to do this, I had lifted her leg up and
started pulling it toward me. She then startled, tried to pull her leg
away from me, and said, "Hey!" To which I replied, "Oh, you've got a
problem with that? I can't understand why, since you were essentially
doing the same to me." She skittered back a few steps, not saying
anything, and then I started forward yet again, this time without her
intervention, and my cane hit somethihng, probably a car, to which I
said out loud, "Oh, there's something there, well, then I'll just go
around it like this. See, that wasn't so hard." And I went on my way.
To this day, I never talked with her or came across her again, not
that I would know anyway since she really didn't say anything, just
stepped forward and grabbed my cane wordlessly. Ah well, you meet all
types in this world of ours, :)

Wayne

On 2/20/10, Tamara Smith-Kinney <tamara.8024 at comcast.net> wrote:
> I like the lamp bit.
>
> And I agree, there comes a time when the only way to deal with breathtaking
> rudeness from others is to be rude yourself.  I have come to the conclusion
> that in a case like that whatever response I'm using that I would consider
> much too rude to comtemplate in normal situations does not amount to my
> being actively rude in order to deal with another's bad manners.
>
> I also have learned to put on an attitude if it appears I'm in danger of
> being helped.  /smile/  It took me awhile to adapt a 'tude that would work
> for me as a blind woman with cane or dog, but I seem to have gotten it
> worked out.  Either that or I've just managed to avoid the worst offenders
> lately.  Whew!
>
> Tami Smith-Kinney
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: nagdu-bounces at nfbnet.org [mailto:nagdu-bounces at nfbnet.org] On Behalf
> Of Julie J
> Sent: Friday, February 19, 2010 5:54 AM
> To: NAGDU Mailing List,the National Association of Guide Dog Users
> Subject: Re: [nagdu] Get control of that dog
>
> Michelle,
>
> I would probably stop riding with this person.
>
> I almost always leave the harness on.  I will take the handle off if it's a
> tight squeeze or he's going to be lounging for a good bit, like at work.  I
> find if I put the handle under my purse that no one will touch it.  Touching
>
> other ladies purses seems to be a pretty strong social no-no.
>
> My family and close friends are very good with respecting my wishes in
> regard to the dog.  Every now and then we have to have a reminder.   Before
> I got Monty we had a lengthy discussion about what was acceptable and what
> wasn't.  My analogy was to treat the dog like a lamp.  You can admire the
> lamp, but you wouldn't pet it, talk to it  or make goofy faces at it.  the
> kids thought this was incredibly funny.  Now if there is an issue all I need
>
> to say is "lamp" and they know.
>
> In the very rare circumstance that someone in the public gives a command to
> Monty he will ignore it.  It frustrates them to no end and amuses me
> greatly.  *smile*
>
> If all else fails, rudeness does work.  It's probably not politically
> correct to say that, but hey it's the truth.
>
> Hope you can get it figured out,
> Julie
>
>
>
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