[nagdu] Why so hard?

Larry D. Keeler lkeeler at comcast.net
Wed Aug 22 20:57:19 UTC 2012


Well, because they spend there lives pleasing us!  Dogs are all qabout that! 
Sometimes even more than our spouses are!  I'm this big tough dude but when 
its time to retire Holly, I'll have to buy some extra clean-exx!
----- Original Message ----- 
From: "Marsha Drenth" <marsha.drenth at gmail.com>
To: "the National Association of Guide Dog Users NAGDU Mailing List" 
<nagdu at nfbnet.org>
Sent: Wednesday, August 22, 2012 12:41 PM
Subject: [nagdu] Why so hard?


> Hi List,
>
> Although I have been writing that Emma is retired, or semi-retired for 
> weeks. And although she hasn't been able to work in a good while. Its 
> official now. She is officially retired. I just continue to say that over 
> and over in myhead, and its not real. *sigh* Why is retiring a guide so 
> hard? I have cried over this so much, and then I think to myself how can I 
> be so attached to this puppy. I feel stupid for crying. But how can one 
> retire a pup without. I know its for the best, for her health, for me, for 
> our stress level. She has not been happy working in several months, and I 
> hate to see her tense because of it. currently she is here with me, and 
> hasn't gone to her retirement home. But to think I'll never leave this 
> house, with her in harness, with her next to me, her protecting me, 
> watching out for me, guiding me. It just makes my heart hurt. This 
> beautiful German Shepard, who has lived in three different states with me, 
> who has traveled on three different college campuses, traveled to numerous 
> cities and places, was in my life at the hardest and the happiness times 
> of my life. She has always been there. My Emma girl, my emmalena. My emma 
> girl who will let babies crawl all over her and not bat an eye lash, who 
> will run, play and jump with my older kids. The girl who has saved my life 
> on numerous occasions, and probably more times that I didn't know about. 
> It just hurts so very very much. Its like you know something in your 
> heart, but your mind hasn't kept up with that thought, and vice versa. 
> Every time I have a birthday I will remember my Emma and the day that we 
> met. It was my present, best one ever. A part of my grief is that I feel 
> like I failed her. Yes she got sick. Which changed her in so many ways. 
> But couldn't I do more, I could have done this or that. Why did I wait so 
> long to to take her to the vet with her EPI. She was a perfect dog for me. 
> This girl had so much energy, so much spunk, she fit me to the T. She 
> absolutely loved working, and now she doesn't. I want that happy, go 
> lucky, spunky girl back!
>
> The why is it so hard question, wasn't one really I needed an answer to. 
> And over the years on this list I have seen lots of pups being retired and 
> their handlers go through the same thing I am now. Yes I have a class date 
> for another pup, but up until then, my mind and heart are going to be with 
> Emma.
>
> Sorry for the rambling.
>
> Marsha drenthSent from my iPhone
> _______________________________________________
> nagdu mailing list
> nagdu at nfbnet.org
> http://nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/nagdu_nfbnet.org
> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for 
> nagdu:
> http://nfbnet.org/mailman/options/nagdu_nfbnet.org/lkeeler%40comcast.net 





More information about the NAGDU mailing list