[nagdu] people who persist in petting

Tue Feb 26 22:39:49 UTC 2013

Yahooo, Robert!!!
You hit the nail on the head - it is plain old DISRESPECT when people think 
they can just go up to a person and pet their dog.  Believe it or not, I've 
encountered SIGHTED people with pets getting annoyed about people just 
walking up to pet their dog!

I've gotten mad at times.  I've said, "How would you like it if you were 
calmly crossing a street when someone sneaks up behind you and puts their 
hands over your eyes?  Would you like that???"  The person usually says, 
"No."  and I say, "Well, why do you think you can do that to me - playing 
with my dog is doing just that."  That's on a nice day.  Mostly, I correct 
my dog as if a squirrel crossed the street as well and Landon distracted on 
it.  Hahaha!  People with squirrel brains!

Lyn and Landon
"Asking who's the man and who's the woman in an LGBT relationship is like 
asking which chopstick is the fork" - Unknown
----- Original Message ----- 
From: "Larry D. Keeler" <lkeeler at comcast.net>
To: "NAGDU Mailing List,the National Association of Guide Dog Users" 
<nagdu at nfbnet.org>
Sent: Monday, February 25, 2013 1:17 PM
Subject: Re: [nagdu] people who persist in petting

> You got that right!  I have a psychology degree as well and find most 
> human behavior fascinating!  It would be fun to explore this topic more 
> but unfortunately I think its beond the scope of this list!
> ----- Original Message ----- 
> From: "Robert Hooper" <hooper.90 at buckeyemail.osu.edu>
> To: "NAGDU Mailing List, the National Association of Guide Dog Users" 
> <nagdu at nfbnet.org>
> Sent: Monday, February 25, 2013 1:36 PM
> Subject: Re: [nagdu] people who persist in petting
>
>
>> Alright, I'm going to indulge in a bit of acidity regarding certain 
>> people, certain dogs, and certain behaviors.
>> As a student of psychology, peoples' perceptions of those with 
>> disabilities is a great interest of mine. I particularly enjoyed the 
>> scenario referenced in the initial email on this subject: "I know I'm not 
>> supposed to, but I'm going to anyway."
>> That is blatant disrespect. Period. I often find that what I say to 
>> someone often carries less weight than what a sighted person says. I 
>> firmly believe that if I were with a sighted person, and somebody asked 
>> to pet my dog, and the sighted person said "yes" and I said "no," the 
>> sighted person would be more likely to commit an indescression. You see 
>> this sort of thing in the way sighted people use one's sighted companions 
>> as a buffer when asking questions. For example, it's not, "How old is 
>> your dog?"; it's "How old is his dog? What does he think about X. Does he 
>> mind if I pet his dog?"
>> Some of these things can be attributed to awkwardness on the part of 
>> somebody unfamiliar with communication with an individual with a 
>> disability, but some things are little forms of discrimination. There is 
>> a phenomenon in gender studies called benevolent or hostile sexism.
>> The following was an actual experiment. An job interview for a position 
>> at a warehouse was taped. The potential employer was a man, and the 
>> potential employee was a young woman. There were two versions of the 
>> interview. In the one demonstrating hostile sexism, the man made comments 
>> about his doubts that a "woman" could lift the requisite weight. He also 
>> made comments about the way she would need to dress, etc. In the video 
>> demonstrating benevolent sexism, the man was very nice to the woman--he 
>> said something to the effect of, "I'm sure that the guys around here 
>> wouldn't mind helping out a pretty young woman such as yourself" in 
>> reference to the weight lifting requirement. The subjects who watched 
>> these videos rated the man as more likeable and the female less likeable 
>> in the video demonstrating benevolent sexism, and the man less likeable 
>> and the woman more so in the video demonstrating hostile sexism. So, it 
>> can be concluded that benevolent sexism can cause greater harm than 
>> hostile sexism.
>> My point in bringing up this study is that I believe something similar 
>> goes on when those with disabilities interface with the public. The 
>> public often does us a disservice by assuming that they are being helpful 
>> and that *we* should be grateful that they are offering said help. In the 
>> same way, when somebody decides to molest our service animals, they are 
>> benevolently showing disrespect by not engaging us first. The respectful 
>> thing to do would be to ask--or even acknowledge that the shmuck with the 
>> dog exists. This reminds me of one particularly bad week I was having a 
>> couple weeks previous. I had just gotten done working out, and I was 
>> waiting on my workout partner to return the lock that we had borrowed. 
>> Somebody walks up and begins to deal Bailey a few strokes. Having had 
>> quite a horrible day, I said the following: "Excuse me, it would be nice 
>> if you could do me the respect and courtesy of treating me like a human 
>> being instead of my dog's [adjective beginning with f] coat stand." I 
>> have to tell you that saying that made me feel like that day had been 
>> salvaged. There is absolutely no reason why we should deal with 
>> *anyone's* lack of disrespect. If somebody molests my dog without 
>> permission, I'm going to be rude about it. Why? Because they didn't show 
>> me the courtesy and respect due another member of society when another 
>> member of society wants to fondle someone's property. They initiated the 
>> rudeness. If Johnny Smith thought that Joey Appleton just had the cutest 
>> set of ears and awesome hair style, does that give Johnny Smith the right 
>> to walk up to Joey Appleton and feel up those ears and that hair while 
>> making cooing noises in his face? Absolutely not. If Johnny Smith asked 
>> Joey Appleton if he could do such, then yay! You have a member of society 
>> who, despite their strange desires, at least has the courtesy to ask. If 
>> somebody exclaimed over the cuteness of your toddler and then proceeded 
>> to fondle them, you'd probably do a lot more than ask them to "stop 
>> petting my child."
>> So, finally, I repeat: I have no tolerance for being ignored or 
>> disrespected. If somebody insists on petting the dog, they will be 
>> physically prevented from doing so, and the police will be summoned. "I 
>> know I'm not supposed to, but I will," isn't cute; it's not exasperating. 
>> It's plainly offensive, insulting, and unacceptable, from any member of 
>> society. Of course, I have no problems with those who don't mind others 
>> petting their dog; however, it's not a bad idea to insist that people at 
>> least acknowledge that you, the human half, have the authority where the 
>> dog is concerned. Don't be your dog's coat stand--you're worth a lot more 
>> respect than that. So, with all that in mind, boys and girls, have a 
>> fantastic day!
>> Lovingly,
>> Robert Hooper
>> Hooper.90 at buckeyemail.osu.edu
>> The Ohio State University, Department of Psychology; Department of 
>> Neuroscience
>> 572 Stinchcomb Drive
>> Apt. 3
>> Columbus, Ohio 43202-3702
>> (740) 856-8195
>>
>> -----Original Message-----
>> From: nagdu [mailto:nagdu-bounces at nfbnet.org] On Behalf Of Eve Sanchez
>> Sent: Monday, February 25, 2013 12:27 PM
>> To: NAGDU Mailing List, the National Association of Guide Dog Users
>> Subject: Re: [nagdu] people who persist in petting
>>
>> It is just the area you are and the people you are around then. My first 
>> dog was a German Shepherd and she was petted all of the time.
>> She was very intimidating looking yet I would have people drop to the 
>> ground in front of her while walking on harness to play kissy face with 
>> her. Those people would then get mad when I would tell them she is a 
>> working dog  and not to be played with. My Golden is absolutely adorable 
>> and has the same issues, but I got her a sign and have gotten a little 
>> ruder to get the point across and not have people ruin her.
>> It helps.I explained to one lady I met who is wheel chair bound, that it 
>> is like somebody pushing her out of her chair. She loved the analogy. My 
>> daughter even recommends that I reply to people who say they want to get 
>> a harness like ours (I hear this all of the time) with something like 
>> "You should try a wheel chair too. They are lots of fun." I wish there 
>> was a wide spread way to let the general population of this country know 
>> that these dogs are working and not play things for their enjoyment. 
>> Children can learn, why not the adults? Eve
>>
>> On Mon, Feb 25, 2013 at 8:26 AM, Tina Thomas <judotina48kg at gmail.com> 
>> wrote:
>>> Hello- I really don't have problems with people petting my dog. I was
>>> just agreeing with Dar about taking a hard line with people when they
>>> have tried to interfere with me and my guide.
>>> Tina and the girls
>>>
>>> -----Original Message-----
>>> From: nagdu [mailto:nagdu-bounces at nfbnet.org] On Behalf Of consuelo
>>> johnson
>>> Sent: Monday, February 25, 2013 4:40 AM
>>> To: 'NAGDU Mailing List, the National Association of Guide Dog Users'
>>> Subject: Re: [nagdu] people who persist in petting
>>>
>>> I don't really have that problem to much, because I'm working a
>>> davenman pitcher,  but when I had my gsd people did approach us to
>>> much because that thought that she was a police dog.  Have you try
>>> using a sign to let people know not to pet your dog.  You can purchase
>>> these sign from gdui or some school offer them for their graduates.
>>> Consuelo and zoey
>>>
>>> -----Original Message-----
>>> From: nagdu [mailto:nagdu-bounces at nfbnet.org] On Behalf Of Tina Thomas
>>> Sent: Monday, February 25, 2013 12:05 AM
>>> To: 'NAGDU Mailing List, the National Association of Guide Dog Users'
>>> Subject: Re: [nagdu] people who persist in petting
>>>
>>> Hello Dar- I too am not polite at a down curb or in the street. I
>>> guess one good thing about having a GSD is that people are not just
>>> coming up and trying to pet my dog.
>>> Tina and the girls
>>>
>>> -----Original Message-----
>>> From: nagdu [mailto:nagdu-bounces at nfbnet.org] On Behalf Of d m gina
>>> Sent: Sunday, February 24, 2013 6:09 PM
>>> To: nagdu at nfbnet.org
>>> Subject: Re: [nagdu] people who persist in petting
>>>
>>> In the street I will not be polite.
>>> I don't have time to explain when I need to find the other curb.
>>> I like the last part you shared
>>> My dog isn't here for you to play with.
>>> to that effect anyway.
>>> When your friend starts to pet the dog in school, I would turn around
>>> and walk away.
>>> Even if you are at the rite place to be.
>>> Just a thought.
>>> Original message:
>>>> Hi guys.
>>>
>>>> I'm curious.  What do you all do when people persist in petting your
>>>> dog.  I do not allow people to pet Brie, and generally, this is not a
>>>> problem.  I just tell whoever is asking (or petting anyway) that she
>>>> is working, which means I do not allow people to pet her.  I can
>>>> usually leave it at that.  But there are a few people who I see at
>>>> church and school who say things like "I know.  I'm going to pet
>>>> anyway."  In fact, one of those lovely people decided to pet Brie
>>>> while we were crossing the street.
>>>
>>>> I don't want to be rude and create a problem, but I'm not sure how to
>>>> tell them in a polite way that I don't want them petting my dog.  I
>>>> am also not sure if they would even listen at that point.  Part of me
>>>> also wonders if it's even a problem, since Brie doesn't generally get
>>>> distracted by this.  She only gets distracted by people she knows,
>>>> and those people know better.  What do you guys do?  I know I'm kind
>>>> of obnoxious when it comes to people petting my dog, but when she is
>>>> working, she is my mobility tool, not a dog on display for others to
>>>> play with.
>>>
>>>
>>>> --
>>>> Julie McG
>>>> National Association of Guide dog Users board member,  National
>>>> Federation of the Blind performing arts division secretary, Missouri
>>>> Association of Guide dog Users President, and Guiding Eyes for the
>>>> Blind graduate 2008 "For God so loved the world that he gave his only
>>>> Son, so that everyone who believes in him may not perish but may have
>>>> eternal life."
>>>> John 3:16
>>>
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>>>> et
>>>
>>> --
>>> --Dar
>>> skype: dmgina23
>>>   FB: dmgina
>>> www.twitter.com/dmgina
>>> every saint has a past
>>> every sinner has a future
>>>
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>>
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>
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