[nagdu] Why, or why not?

Buddy Brannan buddy at brannan.name
Fri Jun 19 20:02:17 UTC 2015


For me, there is one huge overriding negative to using a guide dog. It's the one thing that, both times I went back, made me question whether I really wanted to do this again. Obviously, since I did do it again and am in the process of working on raising #4, then training #4, the positives outweigh for me, but it doesn't take this one aspect away. 

Cleaning up after? Don't care about that, it's just a thing. Hair? We've got other pets too, and if people don't like animal hair, stay the hell away from my house, because there will be some. Vet expenses, food expenses, inconvenient surprises? Don't care about those. 

No, the one disadvantage to working with a guide dog is other people. I don't like having pleasant meals with friends interrupted by random strangers who feel they must know immediately my dog's lineage, life story, and vital statistics. For some reason, I don't find socially fulfilling hearing about the dog you had that was just like mine, only smaller, black, and female. No, really, I don't find that my dog is a "social icebreaker" when random people feel the need to come and admire my dog while I'm crossing the street or waiting for a bus or running late for something. And I really don't care that you think I'm a complete ass because I said that, no, really, you can't pet my dog right now. Funny thing, I got my dog to help me get from where I am to where I'm going more efficiently. I'd really like to do that. 

Here's a blog post that sums this up brilliantly, from a twitter pal in the UK. Apparently, she's gotten some grief for this from other guide dog users who don't believe she is properly grateful. Count me as also not properly grateful, though the issue doesn't rise quite to the level it does for her with me.

From http://catchthesewords.com/i-am-not-my-dog/

I am not my dog

Having a dog can be a good thing. For some, it is a smoother, more effective way of travel. For others the cane is by far the better option. Both are perfectly valid experiences, what works for one blind person doesn’t for another. I have come to loathe the perception that my life must have been awful before getting Isla. I think the media is partly responsible for this, feeding the mentality that guide dogs are always best. Cane users are seen as incompetent, or desperately lonely blind people who must be longing for a dog. That quite simply isn’t true. And just because a person might find guide dog travel better for them doesn’t mean they had no life before getting a dog.

I’ve been thinking about this a lot recently. I’ll be going to university in September and I’m concerned that people will choose to speak to me because I’m holding onto a very cute looking dog, not because I’m a genuinely interesting person…though that’s debatable I suppose! I know some guide dog owners love the extra attention they receive, they feel like they are connecting with more people and it gives them the opportunity to make friends, however for me it’s been a miserable experience. I would rather two people come up to me directly in a week and ask me about the band shirt I’m wearing and whether I’ve seen them, than 200 who want to know my dogs life story. I’m not my dog and I’m desperately trying to break free of that perception. I’m also not public property, I’m a real girl with feelings who would like to be shown the same basic respect others deserve.

To illustrate this, I want to talk about several interactions I’ve had this past week.

On Tuesday I went to the dentist, the guy is new and he was very nice to me. However, he didn’t ask me any questions about my life, besides the obligatory medical history. Our brief conversation revolved around my dog, and how I must find things easier now I have her. The problem I find with this isn’t that people ask, it’s how they phrase it.

“So, your life must be so much better now you have her.”

They aren’t actually asking me if I prefer using a dog or a cane, instead they assume that it is the case. I know people don’t mean it, or probably don’t even think about it. Perhaps it seems like I’m being overly sensitive and it’s a simple issue, however I hear this day in day out. I know that it is how people think, they have this idea that a dog is best for everyone. Canes are seen as your training wheels, after which you progress to a dog. And I always want to tell people no, that isn’t true. But no matter how nicely you explain it many get upset, or even offended. They have this view that a dog is best and telling them no goes against everything they have ever seen in the media. Yes, a person may prefer guide dog travel but that doesn’t mean before they got a dog they sat at home and cried into their pillow.

I did however have a very nice talk with a lady who worked in a shop whilst I was looking for a dress to buy. She was far more interested in describing me the dresses and helping me look for them than asking me personal questions. I shouldn’t have to find experiences like this refreshing, but I do.

However for the rest of the day most questions I received from shop assistants whilst I was paying involved the following:

How old is your dog?
Is it a boy or a girl?
What’s its name?
How long have you had it?
Is it your first dog.

I don’t mind that people ask exactly, but I always get asked this set of questions. I know people don’t realise that I’ve had to answer them hundreds of times before. It honestly gets tiring and boring, and I wish their attention could be diverted elsewhere.

The same happened when I went to get my hair cut. People came and sat next to me while I was waiting, asked me their questions about Isla and that was it. And this is why I hate it. People don’t talk to me because they actually have an interest in who I am, they just want to know about my dog. I would rather people didn’t speak to me at all in that case. Perhaps I’m in the minority, but it is something I think about a lot. I don’t want to put people off approaching guide dog owners but I wish they would think about why they are actually doing it first. If you think that person might need help, and you go up to them to ask that’s fine, if they say yes, by all means help and if they say no, please respect their decision. But if the only reason you speak to a person is to quiz them about their dog and then effectively ignore them…what’s the point?

I understand that for some dog owners the interactions are welcome but personally I don’t enjoy it. I want to go to university and meet people who like the same things I do, who want to spend time with me because they see something that interests them. I don’t want people to spend time with me because they get access to a very friendly dog. I don’t know how I can ensure this, besides trying to figure out why people are actually talking to me. I don’t want to become popular on campus because everyone loves my dog. Ultimately in that situation I mean nothing, it is Isla who people are interested in. It’s the reason why I’m so sure I won’t be getting another dog. I travel well with a cane, yes, dog travel has its benefits but for me the attention I receive because of it is far more negative than any of the positives can add up to be. I wish I didn’t feel this way, but I know it won’t change. I don’t like huge amounts of attention being placed upon me, and I would rather receive very small amounts and be valued as a human.

Dog handlers are real people. Their dogs may look very friendly, but please remember that there is a person holding onto that harness and we all deserve to be valued for the people we are.

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--
Buddy Brannan, KB5ELV - Erie, PA
Phone: 814-860-3194 
Mobile: 814-431-0962
Email: buddy at brannan.name




> On Jun 19, 2015, at 3:08 PM, S L Johnson via nagdu <nagdu at nfbnet.org> wrote:
> 
> Hi,
> 
> Personally I don't find any negatives about having a guide dog.  There are 
> so many positives that nothing is too much work in order for me to have a 
> dog.  , I always ask for a golden so I have lots of hair.  I brush her every 
> night to keep the shedding down.  It is possible your dog had a medical 
> issue that contributed to her excessive shedding.  Also if she were under a 
> lot of stress that could have also caused her to shed more.  Stress for 
> working dogs can cause all kinds of problems.   If people don't want dog 
> hair, then maybe a dog isn't for them.  If people don't want my dog hair in 
> their car, then I don't go anywhere with them.  My dog is more important 
> than that inconsiderate person.  I suppose you could say high vet bills 
> could be a negative but, even that is worth it because the dog gives you so 
> much more independence.  It is a tough question to answer because what you 
> see as a negative might not mean anything to someone else who will do 
> absolutely anything to have a guide dog.  As for access issues, I don't have 
> any problems with it and feel it is just one of the responsibilities of 
> having a guide dog.  It is a personal decision and only you will be able to 
> weigh the positives against the negatives n the end to make your decision. 
> Whatever you decide, good luck.
> 
> Sandra and Eva
> 
> -----Original Message----- 
> From: daniel via nagdu
> Sent: Friday, June 19, 2015 12:05 PM
> To: nagdu at nfbnet.org
> Cc: daniel
> Subject: [nagdu] Why, or why not?
> 
> Hey guys, I haven't posted to the list in a while mainly because I don't
> have my dog anymore; she was terrified of cars and couldn't do work properly
> because of it. I know this is going to come off a bit negatively but I don't
> mean it that way: I feel as if, guide dog users we have a tendency to extol
> the greatness of using a guide dog, we always say how amazing it is and
> wonderful having one by our side is but I feel that the cons aren't ever
> really discussed. I retired my dog roughly a year ago and, at the time, it
> was pretty tramatic (I literally cried for like an hour at a time). I'm now
> really contemplating going back to The Seeing Eye again and am really
> honestly wondering what kind of cons or negative things yall have ran into
> while using a dog? I know there is a huuuge range of people from just
> starting out to have had a dog for the past 20 years so I feel like I can
> get some really good feedback. I know one for me was (and this may sound odd
> or vain) was excessive shedding. I could brush and comb Irene for 30-45
> minutes every evening and morning and yet, every time I got in a car there
> would be fur everywhere and when I vacuumed I could've probably made a
> pillow every time. I have literally never in my life seen a dog shed as much
> as that and am quite frankly not sure where all the fur came from off a 45
> pound dog. However, I think I could deal with it again if I were to get
> another guide dog; I would just have to get even better at managing. I have
> a few others but I'm wondering what are some for yall?
> 
> Again, I really am not trying to be negative just really trying to get the
> whole story.again.
> 
> I'm also (obviously) trying to decide if I want to go back again (that's a
> whole other post though, I think). I'm also not really trying to say (nor do
> I want yet another debate) that canes are better than dogs or vice versa.
> 
> Thanks,
> 
> Dan.
> 
> 
> 
> P.s: This is a sort of spinoff from "would I ever give up having a dog?"
> 
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