[Ncabs] I need your help

sharon_newton sharon_newton at bellsouth.net
Fri Dec 7 16:23:18 UTC 2012


These are all great suggestions.  One situation that drives me crazy is when I am with 
someone, and they grab my arm and pull me this way or that, for example we  are standing 
there talking and someone comes up directly behind me, and us two talkers need to move so 
that the person behind me can get around us.  Just being grabbed and pulled this way or 
that makes me feel inhuman and like a sack of potatoes.  What is wrong with the person I 
am talking to saying "Sharon, there is someone behind us that needs to get by us. Let us 
both move to the right or left two steps.  Many sighted people do not seem to know how to 
give clear directions verbally.  Or, if they are verbal, it comes in the form of "this way 
or that way"  Even in exercise class, the teacher expects us to just follow her example by 
just looking at her - she does not seem to know how to verbalize or, if she says anything, 
it is "Do this, not this".  Even 20/20 people don't catch when she switches to the other 
arm or leg because they are concentration on doing the exercise.   A 50 minute exercise 
class with minimal instruction is not good teaching.

Sharon Newton
----- Original Message ----- 
From: "Currin, Kevin" <kwcurrin at live.unc.edu>
To: "North Carolina Association of Blind Students List" <ncabs at nfbnet.org>
Sent: Thursday, December 06, 2012 11:26 PM
Subject: Re: [Ncabs] I need your help


Hi Cindy and Daria,

Those are great points. Cindy, I would like a copy of the list if you can get one. Daria, 
that's actually the main reason I decided to undertake this project. I was walking with 
one of my friends through the pit (a central place on Carolina's campus) and we were 
stopped by someone campaigning for a student body candidate. The person told my friend in 
reference to me "tell him to vote for this person," as if I couldn't hear her. People have 
this idea that we have super hero hearing, but they also feel like they can say things in 
front of us, and because they are not making eye contact with us, that we won't hear them.

Its also pretty easy to pick up on the non-verbal communication between sighted people 
trying to say things about me without wanting me to know.

Everyone else, please keep sending ideas.

Thanks,

Kevin

________________________________________
From: Ncabs [ncabs-bounces at nfbnet.org] on behalf of Daria Bannerman 
[daria.bannerman at gmail.com]
Sent: Thursday, December 06, 2012 11:17 PM
To: North Carolina Association of Blind Students List
Subject: Re: [Ncabs] I need your help

Hi, all,

The one misconception I have on my mind is we are not invisible. Stop
talking to us in the third person; we are right here.
Daria

On 12/6/12, Cindy Bennett <clb5590 at gmail.com> wrote:
> Great idea! Here are a bunch of mine. And, if you want a good what to
> do when you see a blind person list, I think the NFB has one. I know
> that a version was drafted at BLIND, Inc., and I could get it if you
> wish. I'm glad that you're doing this, and I think it will bring forth
> some great discussion!
>
> If you see me using a white cane, and if I am not following the
> straightest/most efficient path, or if I do not engage in direct eye
> contact, please do not assume that I have lessened cognitive
> abilities. I may, and I may not. Please do not speak to me
> unreasonably loudly or use endearing terms such as "sweetheart" and
> "honey." I am a competent adult, and I would prefer to be addressed as
> such. We have all learned not to judge people by their appearance.
>
> My hearing does not compare to that of a superhero.
>
> If you feel that I may need help or if there is visual information
> that I may wish to know about, please ask me, with verbal language, if
> I would like help or to know such information. Getting my attention by
> physically grabbing me is inappropriate and I may think that you are a
> dangerous person.
>
> If you do ask me if I need help, and if I say no, please do not get
> offended. You probably could be very helpful, but I am making the
> choice to figure out something on my own, and I would prefer if that
> choice was respected. I would award you the same respect.
>
> I am not offended by certain language such as the word "blind" or
> "see." I am blind, and if others have other opinions, then they will
> correct you. Also, I "watch" TV and I "look" at the sunset, not
> "listen." I prefer to use words that align with the rest of society.
>
> My dog is not a compass. I direct it where to go; it does not direct me.
>
> I have interests just like you. Not all of us are weirdly obsessed
> with the stereotypes you see in the movies such as music, massage
> therapy, or guide dogs. If someone does like these things, it is
> doubtful that blindness is the sole reason for such a fascination.
>
> Yes, I am a blind guy, but I am aware that my partner is attractive.
> In fact, that may have been one of the things that drew me to him/her.
> So please don't "let me know" as a stranger in public. That might make
> him/her or both of us uncomfortable. We all have strategies for
> knowing if people are physically attractive or intelligent regardless
> of the presence of sight. And no, for guys especially, it is not by
> inappropriately touching women and blaming it on blindness like you
> see in the movies.
>
> Helen Keller is not my hero. I respect the role that she played in our
> society, but I look up to a lot of other famous people who were/are
> not blind.
>
> I may have blind friends, but I also enjoy interacting with all types of
> people.
>
> My abilities are not limited to intellect. Some blind people are quite
> talented tradesmen, and I am happy to get my hands dirty along with
> everyone else if the job that needs to be done requires physical
> labor.
>
> If I am hanging out with a sighted person, they are not my "worker."
> We are just friends who hang out like everyone else. Sometimes, my
> friend might help me with something, but I assist them as well.
>
> There are a variety of alternative techniques that I incorporate into
> my work. So when I apply for a job, please do not look for the reasons
> why I may not be able to do the job that have to do with blindness and
> immediately dismiss me as a candidate. I would not waste your time
> applying for something I could not foresee myself doing, so try to
> break away from your fears of unfamiliarity and get to know how I do
> things. You never know, some of my techniques might be helpful for
> sighted people too.
>
> If you treat me with respect, I am happy to answer any questions you
> have about blindness. I enjoy educating people. I probably don't have
> an hour to stop and talk in the street though. So if you really want
> to get to know me, then introduce yourself, and maybe we can get
> coffee. And, as much as I can teach you about not only blindness, but
> about myself, I'm sure you'll have plenty to contribute about yourself
> that I can learn as well. There is no set manual for how to interact
> with blind people nor should there be. We are just people. We just
> want the basic respect that you would award anyone else.
>
> Cindy
>
> On 12/6/12, Currin, Kevin <kwcurrin at live.unc.edu> wrote:
>> Hello fellow blind students of North Carolina,
>>
>> As some of you may remember, I am trying to put together a presentation
>> to
>> give to sighted people about blindness. I want to get as much good
>> information as I can from as many people as possible. Therefore, I would
>> greatly appreciate it if each of you could write down a misconception
>> that
>> you think sighted people have about blind people (or blindness in
>> general)
>> and tell me on the call. If you cannot make the call, please email me
>> your
>> ideas.
>>
>> A few examples that I have are:
>> Just because someone uses a cane doesn't mean that they are totally
>> blind.
>> There are different levels of blindness.
>> Blind people don't walk around feeling bad about being blind all the
>> time.
>>
>> These are just a few of mine.
>>
>> Thanks and happy studying,
>>
>> Kevin
>>
>>
>> _______________________________________________
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>> Ncabs at nfbnet.org
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>>
>
>
> --
> Cindy Bennett
> B.A. Psychology, UNC Wilmington
>
> clb5590 at gmail.com
>
> _______________________________________________
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