[nfb-db] Social situations with normal people

[Janice Toothman]

I hope I didn't offend you. I was merely trying to explain something 
that as a new deaf-blind person I had been struggling with. This desire 
to fit in like you; but don't. The everyday experience of either being 
pitied for being thought as disable (i.e. helpless) or some sort or 
disabled superwoman because I am taking graduate counseling classes and 
desire to be self-supporting as a counselor. I want to be seen for who I 
am and not what my disabilities are.
On 7/27/2012 11:34 AM, Gerardo Corripio wrote:
> I think the wanting to appear as normal as possible; all my life I've grown
> up with blindness being the only disability since with my hearing aids I'm
> able to hear OK.
>
> -----Mensaje original-----
> De: nfb-db-bounces at nfbnet.org [mailto:nfb-db-bounces at nfbnet.org] En nombre
> de Janice Toothman
> Enviado el: Jueves, 26 de Julio de 2012 17:27
> Para: NFB Deaf-Blind Division Mailing List
> Asunto: Re: [nfb-db] Social situations with normal people
>
> Gerardo,
> If I may ask, were you afraid of the stigma of being labeled hearing
> impaired or deaf? or was if something else that prompted you to refrain
> from using your FM receiver. I know that for me it is always a struggle
> not wanting to appear different from others yet having a desire to not
> only learn but also to be heard. Because of the stigma of deaf-blindness
> I often did not want draw attention to my needs in a classroom. The
> result was that I could not fully participate in the class and the
> teacher did not know why so I was graded down with respect to
> participation. It is an awful responsibility to be the counseling
> departments first deaf-blind student. This means I must educate my
> professors and classmates not only about deaf-blindness and what we can
> do with the proper training and technology.
> Janice
> On 7/26/2012 2:41 PM, GERARDO CORRIPIO FLORES wrote:
>> Wow! what a great topic! Though I'm not deafblind (I have 70% hearing
>> loss and use hearing aids) I prefer small social gatherings of two
>> three or up to five people at most. ABout fm transmiters, I used to
>> use one some years ago but only used it in school since I'd like to
>> appear as most regular as possible. Keep on this great topic!
>>
>> 2012/7/26, Scott Davert <scottdavert at gmail.com>:
>>> Hi janice.
>>> I've had the same struggles as you have, and my social life has
>>> suffered greatly. I've become an intravert because of this.
>>> I understand also not being able to always hear or see someone when
>>> they say hello to me, and wish that I could offer some suggestions as
>>> to ways of dealing with this. But these are other people we're talking
>>> about, people who have their own actions, thoughts, and assumptions.
>>> All you can do is explain it to them and hope they understand. No
>>> matter what audiological equipment you use, it's never going to be as
>>> good as what would be considered normal hearing. The only way I've
>>> found to deal with my extrovertedness, is to have small gatherings of
>>> like 2 or 3 others, which makes it easier as long as you're not in a
>>> noisey environment. But I fit in nowhere. I have a hard time with
>>> speech and don't know enough sign language. I'm trying to learn sign
>>> language now, but the politics and all the bs surrounding it is making
>>> that difficult. So I just keep pushing on and do the best I can and
>>> live with it. What other choice do I have?
>>>
>>> Scott
>>>
>>> On 7/26/12, Janice Toothman <janice.toothman at verizon.net> wrote:
>>>> I get frustrated by those people who knew me growing up and assume I am
>>>> being rude to them when I don't say "Hi" to them after they have said
>>>> "Hi" to me. Do I always have to explain to people that I am not being
>>>> rude or trying to brush them off but that I honestly didn't hear them
>>>> because I am deaf and that I didn't see them because I am blind. How do
>>>> you go to social events where the majority are sighted and your the only
>>>> deaf-blind person and you can't make sense of the person your having a
>>>> conversation with because of all the other noises/conversions going on
>>>> in the room?
>>>>
>>>> I feel very isolated from my peers because I cannot hear conversations
>>>> in a classroom when others are talking as well. Similarly family
>>>> gatherings do not have usual anticipation at going to these events has
>>>> diminished greatly due to my deaf-blindness.
>>>> This is a challenge for me when I go back to school. The University
>>>> offers me transcribers for my class but they write the "gist" of what is
>>>> said and often leave out important dates and names of authors. Also, I
>>>> do not receive this transcription in real time but within 24-36 hours
>>>> after the class has ended.
>>>> Unfortunately, when I go to conventions I have to rely on my FM system
>>>> and a digital recorder.
>>>> Has anyone else had problems problems in social situations.
>>>>
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