[NFB-Krafters-Korner] Off topic: if you feel like a computer idiot…

[Ericka]

I found this today in my email. Several people have asked computer related questions here this week and I thought we all needed a good laugh.

Ericka Nelson

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> From: Madison Martin via BlindTlk <blindtlk at nfbnet.org>
> Date: August 6, 2021 at 12:35:25 PM CDT
> To: Blind Talk Mailing List <blindtlk at nfbnet.org>
> Cc: madisonmartin463 at gmail.com
> Subject: [BlindTlk] FW: [blind-t] FW: [blind-techies] FW: [TechTalk] Don't Feel Stupid About Using Your Computer, Read On, Humor
> Reply-To: Blind Talk Mailing List <blindtlk at nfbnet.org>
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Hi All,
> 
> Just thought some of you would get a kick out of this.
> 
> 
> Don't feel stupid about using your computer, read on.
> 
> This is an  excerpt from a Wall Street Journal article:
> 
> 1. Compaq is considering changing the command "Press Any Key" to "Press Return
> Key" because of the flood of calls asking where the Any Key is.
> 
> 2. SAT technical support had a caller complaining that her mouse was hard to
> control with the dust cover on.  The cover turned out to be the plastic bag
> the mouse was packaged in.
> 
> 3. Another SAT customer was asked to send a copy of her defective diskettes. A
> few days later a letter arrived from the customer along with photocopies
> of the floppies.
> 
> 4. Another Dell customer called to say he couldn't get his computer to fax
> anything.  After 40 minutes of troubleshooting, the technician
> discovered the man was trying to fax a piece of paper by holding it in front of
> the monitor screen and hitting the "send" key.
> 
> 5. A Dell technician received a call from a customer who was enraged because
> his computer had told him he was "bad and an invalid," The
> tech explained that the computer's "bad command" and "invalid" responses
> shouldn't be taken personally.
> 
> 6. A confused caller to IBM was having troubles printing documents.  He told
> the technician that the computer had said it "couldn't find printer." The
> user had also tried turning the computer screen to face the printer but that his
> computer still couldn't "see" the printer."
> 
> 7. An exasperated caller to Dell Computer Tech Support couldn't get her new
> Dell Computer to turn on.  After ensuring the computer was
> plugged in, the technician asked her what happened when she pushed the power
> button. Her response, "I pushed and pushed on this foot pedal and nothing
> happens." The "foot pedal" turned out to be the mouse.
> 
> 8. Another customer called Compaq tech support to say her brand-new computer
> wouldn't work. She said she unpacked the unit, plugged it in and sat there
> for 20 minutes waiting for something to happen. When asked what happened when
> she pressed the power switch, she asked "What power switch?"
> 
> 9. Another IBM customer had troubles installing software and rang for support.
> "I put in the first disk, and that was OK. It said to put in the second
> disk, and I had some problems with the disk. When it said to put in the third
> disk, I couldn't even fit it in...." The user hadn't realized that "Insert
> Disk 2" meant to remove Disk 1 first.
> 
> 10. In a similar incident, a customer had followed the instructions for
> installing software. The instructions said to remove the disk from its cover and
> insert into the drive. The user had physically removed the casing of the disk
> and wondered why there were problems.
> 
> 11. True story from a Novell NetWare Sysop:
> 
> Caller: "Hello, is this Tech Support?"
> 
> Tech: "Yes, it is. How may I help you?"
> 
> Caller: "The cup holder on my PC is broken and I am within my warranty period.
> How do I go about getting that fixed?"
> 
> Tech: "I'm sorry, but did you say a cup holder?"
> 
> Caller: "Yes, it's attached to the front of my computer."
> 
> Tech: Did you receive this as part of a promotional at a trade show?  How did
> you get this cup holder? Does it have any trademark on it?"
> 
> Caller: It came with my computer. I don't know anything about a promotion. It
> just has '4X' on it."
> 
> At this point, the Tech Rep had to mute the caller because he couldn't stand
> it. He was laughing too hard. The caller had been using the load drawer of
> the CD-ROM drive as a cup holder and snapped it off the drive.
> 
> 12. A woman called the Canon help desk with a problem with her printer. The
> tech asked her if she was running it under "Windows." The woman responded,
> "No, my desk is next to the door. But that is a good point. The man sitting in
> the cubicle next to me is under a window and his  printer is working fine."
> 
> 13. Tech Support: "O.K. Bob, let's press the control and escape keys at the
> same time. That brings up a task list in the middle of the screen.
> Now type the letter "P" to bring up the Program Manager."
> Customer: "I don't have a 'P'."
> Tech: "On your keyboard, Bob."
> Customer: "What do you mean?"
> Tech: "'P' on your keyboard, Bob."
> Customer: "I'm not going to do that!"
> 
> Now don't you feel better about your skill level?
> 
> 
> 
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