[Pibe-division] Eating with a Fork-Emily G.

Wed Jan 7 14:48:32 UTC 2009

Dear List,

Regarding the 11 year who doesn't know how to eat with a fork, I think
it was obvious to everyone that there is other things going on in this
situation.   I didn't mention this student's other issues because every
child I serve is so unique and complicated I often find that I need to
separate the issues in order to get a picture of what is really going
on.   If I don't mention any addition disabilities, you all are great in
giving me an idea of what I should expect from a typical blind child.
In this situation, I was more curious how I should handle it.   I KNOW
that my student should be eating with a fork, I KNOW that it's not
really my job to teach her how to do so, but I also KNOW that sometimes
I get roped into to doing things.   Here's how I handled it.

-I've put more responsibilities on the classroom teacher and aides.  

            She is in a self-contained classroom and I've put a lot of
emphasis on independence.   How she should know where her materials are
and be able to retrieve and replace them on request as well as find her
way around the classroom and to the restroom and that, most importantly,
she was doing this last year with no problem.   She moved to the Middle
School this year and she is being coddled.

-I emailed her mother a selection of Future Reflections articles talking
about independence, manners and eating skills and told her to let me
know what else I could do for her.   I've received no response but I
will follow up again.

-I'm planning on going in at lunch one day next week and demonstrate for
the classroom teachers how they should insist that she uses utensils
while eating at school.   I think that just having the expectation that
she use them will be a nice first step.

Can you think of anything else I should do?

,Emily ,Gibbs

Emily L Gibbs M.Ed. NCLB

Teacher of Blind Students

586.489.6017

979.730.7155 x11594

-----Original Message-----
From: pibe-division-bounces at nfbnet.org
[mailto:pibe-division-bounces at nfbnet.org] On Behalf Of Carrie Gilmer
Sent: Tuesday, January 06, 2009 10:25 PM
To: 'Professionals in Blindness Education Division List'
Subject: Re: [Pibe-division] Eating with a Fork-Emily G.

Dear Emily,

I have come back to this thread in "cleaning out" my inbox and read it
more carefully. I am interested to know what has come of it as this is
not the first time I have seen blind children (no other disability also)
this age being age inappropriate in eating and all it entails (salt and
pepper, opening cartons or juice box straws). 

My thought would be (if it was me) in this case to make a home visit
even just to find out if this was the tip of an ice berg (which I fear
it is). I guess also the question would be why the OT has no other
concerns (if the parent doesn't)-did you think she should? Was the OT
trying to pass off something to you or was it genuine and maybe even
surprising to you that this student (given performance in other areas)
was not eating with a fork. Anyway I'd like to know the rest of the
story...

I am concerned about finding better or stronger ways to reach that group
of parents who seem to think they must do everything for their blind
child and have really low expectations. Some feel so overwhelmed they
can't imagine what to do or how to do it and are ashamed to ask. They
have more fears and false ideas about blindness than the determination
to have their child do normal things. They are more afraid of their
child doing than not doing. I notice it in educated economically
well-off families and in uneducated and low income and everything
in-between. They think like the rest of the world that it is amazing or
inspirational when their child can do the simplest of things that they
wouldn't think twice about their sighted child doing. 

 I also sometimes find really "good" parents think some daily living
things must be taught by a professional too. In my experience, no one
ever told me what clearly was the TBS "job", they seemed to want to
control everything at school and never gave me any information about the
how or why or what of academics or what to look for or think about when
integrating in a regular classroom. They also made no inquiry about home
even academically or to ensure he had books, they never once offered any
suggestions for social or lunch or playground at home or school, for all
they knew I was still cutting his meat or handing him shampoo when he
was 11 (I wasn't)- waiting for the checklist for transition or the three
year eval is too long and too late! My son's teachers all knew of Future
Reflections but never gave me a copy or told me about it, or talked with
me about "blindness" itself or what to expect or what kind of commitment
it took or what a blind adult needed for home or work everyday. He had
had five different teachers of blind students by ninth grade-not one of
them gave us anything. Obviously the doctors aren't telling parents (and
don't know) and if they don't find us (NFB)-who is there to tell them
but the teacher? 

I know you are not like the teacher's my son had Emily (and the same for
most if not all on this list I am sure), but I think it important to not
assume that a parent knows anything or most things and could be doing
much more for the student than is realized. There are ways to "check"
and to give the parent info without "threatening" or appearing to tell
them they are bad parents (which they might very well feel once they
find out how "off" they have been). It is also one thing to realize you
have made big mistakes in teaching or your job and to correct, I think
it is a much harder thing to face you have made mistakes in parenting. I
know that just like there are a few teachers who will never believe and
shouldn't be teaching there are a few parents who will never believe and
maybe shouldn't be parenting; but for the most part these
over-protective or low-expecting parents I have found want their fears
calmed-they want a reason to believe; they just need some evidence and
some "how to's" and empowering to believe it is not rocket science and
they can do it.

Anyway I'd like to hear what has come of the situation if you don't mind
sharing more. 

 Best Regards,

Carrie Gilmer, President

National Organization of Parents of Blind Children

A Division of the National Federation of the Blind

NFB National Center: 410-659-9314

Home Phone: 763-784-8590

carrie.gilmer at gmail.com

www.nfb.org/nopbc

________________________________

From: pibe-division-bounces at nfbnet.org
[mailto:pibe-division-bounces at nfbnet.org] On Behalf Of Gibbs, Emily
Sent: Monday, December 15, 2008 2:36 PM
To: aernet at lists.aerbvi.org; Professionals in Blindness Education
Division List
Subject: [Pibe-division] Eating with a Fork

I was just contacted by the OT in my school district and she is
apparently dismissing one of my blind students from service.   She had
just discussed this with the parent and the parent's only concern was
the fact that this 11year old can not eat with a fork.   The OT wanted
to know if I would be willing to do a home visit in order to help them
teach this student to eat with a fork at home. 

What would you do in this situation?   

,Emily ,Gibbs

Emily L Gibbs M.Ed. NCLB

Teacher of Blind Students

586.489.6017

979.730.7155 x11594

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