[stylist] critique this story please if you have time

[vejas]

Hi,
For all you writers-chat folks, I think I said I liked writing 
for teens, but this story is an acception.  It's supposed to be 
somewhat based on the "It's Beginning to Look a Lot like 
Christmas" song (meaning you'll find a lot of reference to it in 
this story.)
Enjoy.
Thanks anybody who is willing to look this through real quick.
Vejas
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