[stylist] interesting Background info for a good blindness story

Thu Apr 5 12:58:47 UTC 2012

Linda do you know the Authors name, although I'm not looking for a wife, it 
sounds like a great read. Thank you Paul E Baver
----- Original Message ----- 
From: "Lynda Lambert" <llambert at zoominternet.net>
To: "Writer's Division Mailing List" <stylist at nfbnet.org>
Sent: Thursday, April 05, 2012 8:09 AM
Subject: Re: [stylist] interesting Background info for a good blindness 
story


> Have you read the book _Cock Eyed_? It is the story of the author who was 
> blind. It is hilarious as we are taken into his situations with women and 
> dating. He is married now and is a college professor - an English Prof. 
> and has a great life.  I think you would enjoy this book and might just 
> get some tips for finding your lady, too.  Happy hunting!  Lynda
>
> Lynda Lambert
> 104 River Road
> Ellwood City, PA 16117
>
> 724 758 4979
>
> My Blog:  http://www.walkingbyinnervision.blogspot.com
> My Website:  http://lyndalambert.com
>
>
>
>
>
>
> ----- Original Message ----- 
> From: "justin williams" <justin.williams2 at gmail.com>
> To: "'Writer's Division Mailing List'" <stylist at nfbnet.org>
> Sent: Thursday, April 05, 2012 12:30 AM
> Subject: Re: [stylist] interesting Background info for a good blindness 
> story
>
>
>> That's rough.  In the south, I encounter a lot of closed minded people; 
>> more
>> than in any other part of the country.  All the classy women, you know 
>> the
>> ones who have college degrees and who are close to our level of skilled 
>> and
>> intelligence, don't seem to want you because they know they can get a man
>> who can see; including the ones on Match.com, and they all say there so 
>> open
>> minded; isn't that a joke.  I nearly choke every time I hear it.  I 
>> refuse
>> to settle.  Not only have I tried the dating web sites, I have traveled 
>> all
>> over the city; frequenting a number of different settings such as house
>> parties, churches,  and other social establishments; seemingly to no 
>> avail.
>> I have found very few instances where a woman was interested.  I get 
>> treated
>> as more of a curiosity.  My best conversations seem to be with married 
>> women
>> probably because neither they, nor their husbands consider me a threat;
>> isn't that uplifting.  We already know that most women don't consider us
>> viable mates already; I mean, that is what the article said right! It 
>> just
>> agreed with my own findings didn't it.  I hope I'm wrong.  I am black, 
>> and I
>> know very few blind men married to sighted women; especially amongst my
>> race, though race to me is no object; a good thing, for I can truly 
>> claime
>> the open minded trait that seems to be so elusive to most.  Now I realize
>> that you guys are a captive audience, so if you wish to get at me for
>> venting just a little, then please, feel free.  Understand however, that 
>> I
>> am really sending this to God; though he already knows.
>>
>> -----Original Message-----
>> From: stylist-bounces at nfbnet.org [mailto:stylist-bounces at nfbnet.org] On
>> Behalf Of Robert Leslie Newman
>> Sent: Wednesday, April 04, 2012 9:42 AM
>> To: writers nfb
>> Subject: [stylist] interesting Background info for a good blindness story
>>
>> I got this article from the NFBTalk list: the subject line read- 
>> Blindness
>> and sexuality
>>
>>
>>
>> Blindness and Sexuality: Researching Myths and Facts Summary Report:
>>
>>
>>
>> Distributed by: National Data Distribution Center (NDDC)
>>
>>
>>
>> April 1, 2009
>>
>>
>>
>> Atlanta Georgia
>>
>>
>>
>>
>>
>> The two hundredth anniversary of the birth of Louis Braille is being
>> celebrated by the US mint with the production of a silver coin 
>> commemorating
>> the man who created the modern reading system used by many blind people.
>>
>> Unfortunately, although blind people work and live normal lives, they are
>> still different in many ways and their experiences are a matter of 
>> curiosity
>> amongst the sighted population.  For most of us, the question, "What is 
>> it
>> like to be blind?," has entered our minds more than once.
>>
>>
>>
>>
>>
>> Research, some of it useful and much of it not, about how people who are
>> blind perceive the world, abounds.  One of the more interesting topics of
>> study is sexuality among the blind.  The story, goes that blind people 
>> are
>> incredible sexual partners--somehow being extremely sensitive to their
>> partners and, being able to stimulate them far more than the average 
>> person.
>>
>>
>>
>>
>>
>>
>>
>>
>>
>> Masters and Johnson were so intrigued by this subject that they collected
>> data over several years from those who had had sex with blind people.
>>
>> Surprisingly, what they thought would be myths, turned out to be true. 
>> The
>> results were stunning.  On average, women rated their blind partners 9.1 
>> on
>> a scale of 10.  The average rating was five for sighted partners.
>>
>>
>>
>>
>>
>> "This research has been duplicated several times," says Author Mary 
>> Roach,
>> author of, 2008 best seller, Bonk: the Curious Coupling of Science and 
>> Sex.
>>
>> The data hasn't attracted much attention because blindness is such a low
>> incidence event.  "We usually print things that have broad interest. 
>> And,
>> even though this indicates that blind people are incredibly sexual, there
>> aren't really enough of them to go around."
>>
>>
>>
>>
>>
>> Comments from sighted partners were astounding.  "He seemed like he knew 
>> my
>> soul," from a 23 year old female.  "Her tongue knew just how to touch 
>> every
>> part of me if you know what I mean," from a college male.  One woman
>> commented, "The things he could do with his fingers were beyond 
>> description
>> in this survey.  It's not that he was built bigger than other men, it 
>> just
>> seemed like he touched me inside with it all over,"  she said with a shy
>> smile.
>>
>>
>>
>>
>>
>> When William Masters was asked, in a 1971 interview, why he didn't draw 
>> more
>> attention to these findings he said, "I didn't know anything about
>> blindness.  We were publishing information of general interest about
>> sexuality and this just didn't fit that mold.  Perhaps some day 
>> researchers
>> will help us understand why blind people have such incredible sexual
>> capacities and we'll be able to use that information to increase the
>> abilities of others.  Until then, a very few lucky men and women will
>> experience the phenomena of sex with a blind person."
>>
>>
>>
>>
>>
>> There is a down side to this research.  When interviewed, blind people
>> generally expressed frustration about sexuality.  Broadly speaking, they
>> divided sighted people into three groups.  First is the group who simply
>> want to have sex with them for the thrill and experience of it.  "We feel
>> used," was the most common thing reported.  second, was the group who 
>> simply
>> couldn't see themselves with a blind husband or wife.  "They want to be 
>> with
>> us, but don't see us as fathers and mothers, for example,"  was often 
>> heard.
>>
>> the third group were those who "get it" as one blind man put it.  "They 
>> can
>> see beyond blindness and except us for who we are.  Blindness just fades
>> into the background and becomes another characteristic."
>>
>>
>>
>>
>>
>> The sad truth is that although blind people work, raise families, travel
>> independently and generally speaking, live normal lives, the public
>> perception is the opposite.  The image of the helpless beggar still lurks 
>> in
>> our minds.  Sighted people report that the fear of blindness overwelms 
>> their
>> rationality.  "I know that I shouldn't let blindness interfere with how I
>> think about my partner, but, I can't help it," said a young college 
>> student
>> engaged to a blind physicist working at NASA.  "Yes, he has money, and 
>> yes,
>> he's sexy, and oh, my god, can he please me, if you know what I mean. 
>> The
>> hardest thing is getting over this image of him as a helpless blind man. 
>> We
>> sail, bike ride and horse back ride.  I can't think of anything he can't 
>> do
>> except drive, but, I'll admit, the image of a helpless blind man still
>> haunts me.  People look at him with such pity and I just want to scream,
>> "You don't get it you fools.""  But she admits that making the decision 
>> to
>> mary is difficult.
>>
>>
>>
>>
>>
>> Chad, a young blind college student says he finds the whole sex thing a 
>> bit
>> distracting.  "Sure I can please women more than my sighted friends can, 
>> and
>> frankly, it's because they just don't pay attention to women and what 
>> their
>> bodies and hearts are saying.  Women will tell you everything you need to
>> know if you just listen and feel."
>>
>>
>>
>>
>>
>> We give you all of this information with the caviat that perhaps only one 
>> in
>> six thousand people is an eligible blind man or woman, so, happy 
>> searching.
>>
>>
>>
>>
>>
>> Robert Leslie Newman
>>
>> Personal Website-
>>
>> Adjustment To Blindness And Visual impairment
>>
>> http//www.thoughtprovoker.info
>>
>> NFB Writers' Division, president
>>
>> http://www.nfb-writers-division.net
>>
>> Chair of the NFB Communications Committee
>>
>>
>>
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