[stylist] More on article showing what parents and kids arefacing

Sun Feb 17 20:14:00 UTC 2013

Lynda,
I've had the same experiences, mainly at the Guide Dog Foundation. Last time
I was there, we had 4 teens who were all brilliant, well-adjusted kids, and
it was a joy to be around them. I've also met those with the poor table
manners and those stuck in a rut.

I would just ask you to consider how defeated a person can get when they
grow up with no support and are being brainwashed about how limited they are
and how worthless. I had an old friend decades ago who went to the Overbrook
School for the Blind outside of Philadelphia back in the '30s. She told me
it was common for parents to drop off babies once they learned that they
would be blind for the rest of their lives. I don't know if this happens
nowadays; I'm guessing it does at least in the cases of multi-handicapped
children.

One woman I heard of in the past five years had a blind daughter who was
over 15 before learning how to tie her own shoes. Her mother sincerely
thought she was doing the right thing by helping her with everything. She
learned better -- imagine what a road that was. Some parents are so ashamed
of their blind kids that they can't even allow them to have a momentary spot
in the sun for an achievement. For instance, when I talked to a couple of
the parents of our writing contest winners about getting a little article in
their local paper, they actually verbalized that they and their child were
ashamed about their blindness and didn't want to draw attention to it.

The point is that it is very difficult for a human being to survive
spiritually when the formative years of their lives have been characterized
by this kind of oppression. I'm not saying it isn't surmountable, just that
it takes more than most of us have. Also, I personallly believe that the
scars never go away. The importance of being a part of a family,
neighborhood, school community as a young child cannot be overstated. It's
like having a beautiful hand-made quilt that gets horribly ripped. A gifted
and patient seamstress can mend it, and some of the original beauty can
shine through, but the marks of the damage will always be there.

Some people have no other way of expressing their frustration and anger than
to act like the gal who thought she was on vacation. Some are so defeated
that, even though they know they are being socially inappropriate, they
figure, "what's the point?" This isn't to say we are unjustified in being
put off by them, just some observations.
Donna

-----Original Message-----
From: stylist [mailto:stylist-bounces at nfbnet.org] On Behalf Of Lynda Lambert
Sent: Sunday, February 17, 2013 9:02 AM
To: Writer's Division Mailing List
Subject: Re: [stylist] More on article showing what parents and kids
arefacing

I am not "out and about" in the blind mileau at all, so I only know things
from my own contacts, which have been minimal. I observed a few things when
I was in that rehab place for 15 weeks though, which really made me get some
insight about this.

First, there are people who are blind that seem to circle about from one
place to another, doing "rehab" at various places in the country. It was
fairly clear to me that these folks were really in no way ever going to be
seriously working.  I mean, if you have been blind since birth, or have been
blind for a lot of years, why would you still be in technology classes and
doing personal adjustment to blindness programs for years and years?

Some had such bad table manners and lack of social skills they would be
unemployable anywhere. You would not even want to sit at the same table at
lunch with some of them.

Then, I met  one woman in her mid-40s who told me " I am here for a
vacation." She was going through the motions as though she really wanted to
get a job, but behind the faces of  the rehab people, she openly joked about
her vacation there and how she was enjoying it and had no intention of going
to school or working - she was a housewife and that is all she wanted to be,
yet to get her "vacation" she had to pretend to want something more. I told
her one day, "I really do know what a vacation is, and this is not it."

On the positive side, though, I was there when the high school seniors came
in for their program and they were all college bound. I stayed on to help
with them a little, and did some classes with them to help them understand
what going to college would be like. Those students were so sharp and
winsome, and it was very clear to me that they would be doing anything they
would ever want to do - they had the drive to do it.  Someone was doing
something absolutely right with those young students and I know their life
will be great.

Lynda

----- Original Message -----
From: "Bridgit Pollpeter" <bpollpeter at hotmail.com>
To: <stylist at nfbnet.org>
Sent: Saturday, February 16, 2013 11:05 PM
Subject: [stylist] More on article showing what parents and kids are facing

> Donna,
>
> The missing factor is that of that reported 70% unemployed, it includes
> children too young for employment and retired seniors not to memention
> people who are blind plus some other disability making it less simple to
> work. So when you actually just look at blind people who are of working
> age and able to work, it is less than 70%. So yes, to a degree, we are
> exaggerating, but as you mention, it's still too high a number, and I
> also might add, how many are working regular jobs, for lack of a better
> term, and how many are working sheltered workshop jobs or something
> similar. Many states boast high employment rates among blind graduates
> of training centers, but often, many are employed by sheltered workshops
> or something akin to a sheltered workshop. Work is work, but we also
> have to consider how many blind people are being encouraged and expected
> to achieve their full potential, and how many are just deemed well off
> because they are working regardless that employers like this expect very
> little giving blind employees menial jobs and paying even less. Sorry,
> someone had to say it.
>
> Bridgit
> Message: 1
> Date: Sat, 16 Feb 2013 22:07:56 -0500
> From: "Donna Hill" <penatwork at epix.net>
> To: "'Writer's Division Mailing List'" <stylist at nfbnet.org>
> Subject: Re: [stylist] more on : Article showing what parents & kids
> arefacing
> Message-ID: <4ECC685BBD634B04962D293E130064BB at OwnerHP>
> Content-Type: text/plain; charset="us-ascii"
>
> Robert,
> I'm confused. Shouldn't we be using the Dept. of Labor's formula for
> figuring unemployment? If that's what they use for everyone, and they're
> getting a much lower unemployment rate than we've been led to believe
> ... Well, it doesn't sound right. I mean, 38% is still terrible and way
> worse than the general unemployment numbers, but we've been telling
> people it's 70%. If we're using a non-standard method of calculating it,
> aren't we opening ourselves up to the criticism that we're exaggerating
> the problem? What am I missing here? Donna
>
>
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