[stylist] The Golgotha Tarot

[Chris Kuell]

Hey Bill,

 

This was actually a fairly longish short story, in my opinion. For future
reference, you might want to mention that.

        I.            Having said that, I think you have a very entertaining
story here. Sure, it needs a lot of editing, but I think it's worth the
trouble. Plus, you learn a lot by doing many edits (less likely to make
those same mistakes again). 

I didn't mind the POV shift, as I understood when the protagonist was
speaking/thinking, and when Klinghoffer was. But, Bridgit was right in
saying you could make that clearer and smoother. I love the sense of humor,
the irony, the cockiness of the piece. And I actually found the ending
satisfying. Without looking, the student saw the teacher as someone he
didn't want to be, and left. There's your change.

 

Take some time to rework this, and I think you could find someone to publish
it. Bewildering Stories, perhaps.

 

Chris

 

 

 

Bridgit already gave you an excellent critique, so I won't take the time to
do the same. However, you should definitely appreciate the time she put in
to it, and realize that writing quality fiction is an art, and takes a lot
of work.