[Stylist] poem feedback welcome

[Ann Chiappetta]

Hi all-

My email for Feedback  is anniecms64 at gmail.com <mailto:anniecms64 at gmail.com>


 

This is a modified ghazal poem. It uses couplets  independent from one
another and a strong repetitive word. Originally I read it was also rigid
regarding the meter and syllabic style but those written in English  aren’t
adhered to as strictly.

Read more here: 

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ghazal#:~:text=A%20ghazal%20commonly%20consist
s%20of,those%20of%20the%20Petrarchan%20sonnet.

 

I played with it a bit and this is the result.

 

Mileage 

Ann Chiappetta

 

rain blows east

wind pushes east

 

chalet slopes west

high rise     faces east

 

90° of north 

Going home is east

 

The dog star howls

summer bright in the east

distance dilutes Love   

>From west  to east

 

Ann, said the loved boy 

Return to me

I wept in the west

and faced east

 

 

2023

 

 

 

 

Ann Chiappetta, MS

President, Friends In Art, Inc.

 <mailto:president at friendsinart.org> president at friendsinart.org
<http://www.friendsinart.org> www.friendsinart.org 

914.393.6605 

 <http://www.annchiappetta.com> www.annchiappetta.com

Trust your dreams. Trust your heart and trust your story. Neil Gaiman

 

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