[blindkid] New Member with lots of questions...

Wed Nov 12 15:40:28 UTC 2008

Dear Jessica,
I am sure some others will chime in. But here is an oldie but goodie from
our magazine, in 1995. As an added bonus dressing self is also addressed in
the article. For my own blind son, typical positive reinforcement was used.
For all my kids a special jar of m an m's was used which at the time was the
only way to get M and M's; they received also lots of verbal praise and I
also tried to anticipate times and we went in before it was too late (they
could barely hold it) to "try". I personally had no unordinary difficulties
with it for any of my four so that is about all I can personally speak to.

Future Reflections Fall 1995, Vol. 14 No. 3 

EARLY INDEPENDENT SKILLS
Toilet Training ** Dressing
The following material is reprinted from Guide for Parents of Pre-School
Visually Handicapped Children a booklet written by Dorothy Bryan.

Editor's Note: There is nothing mysterious or especially complicated about
teaching blind children early independent skills. Parents who have
toilet-trained a sighted child will notice, for example, almost no
difference between the description below and the process they followed.
There are a few adaptations and special considerations, but otherwise the
process is the same. 

It would be great if this were all we needed to say on the subject. It would
save parents a lot of anxiety and fear not to mention the money, paper, and
time which goes into this magazine for the benefit of parents. But the
stereotypes of blindness die hard and besides, humans are contrary
creatures. We want to be shown how something works, not just told it is so.
Don't be surprised then if your reaction after you read the following
article is, "But that's not so different. It's just what you'd do with a
sighted kid!" That's the point!

Toilet Training

Ideas about when to start toilet training have changed from time to time.
Most people concede that it is wise to wait until the child is old enough to
understand what is expected of him. Regardless of when you start such
training, you must guard against urging and pressuring your child if you
want to avoid a long, drawn out training period. A child can easily develop
a stubbornness about going to the bathroom if he is scolded for mistakes.

In preparation for training, you should let the child learn about the
bathroom and how it is used. He will not observe others going and coming
from the bathroom, or be in it with them incidentally, unless you make a
point of giving him the experience. Let him go into the bathroom with you.
Show him the fixtures. Flush the toilet (with the lid closed since it will
be less noisy and less startling to him than when left open). Then let him
flush the toilet as you tell him how the water carries away refuse. Explain
that hands are washed after going to the toilet and help him learn how to
turn on the tap, find the soap, and wash his own hands. Provide a stool upon
which he can stand to be at the right height to do this. Speak of bodily
functions in simple terms. Let him realize that people go to the bathroom to
take care of bodily elimination.

If your child has fairly regular bowel movements, you can try putting him on
his toilet seat about the time he usually appears to have need of it. A
toilet chair that allows the child's feet to rest on the floor is considered
better than a seat so high that his feet have no support. Do not leave him
seated too long. Make no fuss over whether or not he has had a movement, but
comment that it is good when he has had success.

Even after a child learns about the use of the bathroom, he will not be able
to let you know he needs to go in time to avoid accidents. This is
frustrating and requires patience, but is a normal part of training. He will
learn to control his bowel movement before he gains bladder control. When he
has an accident, put him on the toilet for a short time before changing him
and explain that this is where he should go for elimination. Also, promptly
put on dry underwear so he will realize how much more comfortable they are
than the wet ones. Do not scold or punish him for accidents, but praise him
when he tells you in time to use the toilet and does not have to be changed.

Toilet training for all children is a slow process with spurts of success
and periods of regression. The more you can accept this calmly, the quicker
and easier the training will be. Remember, learning to use the toilet does
not require sight. The visually handicapped child is not slowed down through
lack of vision. He is simply following the same pattern as other children.
It requires time and patience to teach any child to remember to get to the
bathroom in time to take care of his needs.

Dressing

Instinctively a child begins undressing, pulling off socks and clothes
before she is interested in putting them on. Even so, you can start
preparation for learning to dress by telling her about her clothes (their
color and use) as you put them on her, and handing her a sock or shoe to
hold until you are ready for it. While telling her about each item, let her
examine it by touch and by use of any sight she may have. From this, you can
move into showing her how to do the simple things. Help her learn the right
opening for each foot so that pants will pull up into the right place. Let
her learn to hold up her arms for you to start over her head and guide her
arms into the armholes. After you get her head and arms through her shirt or
undershirt, let her pull it down.

When you start teaching her to put things on for herself, be sure to choose
the simple, easy to manage clothes instead of the complicated ones that look
attractive, but are not designed for the child to handle without your help.
Place her clothes on a chair seat or the foot of a bed where she can reach
them and help her learn which to put on first. She will have to be shown how
to get her arms into the armholes and the different ways to do this when the
garment opens, as compared with the one that goes over the head. They must
learn how to find the front and back of pants so that they will fit as they
should, then how to fit one foot and then the other into the legs before
standing up to pull the garment into place. In the beginning, you may want
to hand the pants to your child with the top toward her and turned in the
right direction. Later, you can lay them out with the top facing the child
so that she will pick them up in the easiest way for handling. 

Choose socks that fit loosely so your child will not have to struggle to get
them on. Show her how to feel the heel and be sure she gets it to the
underside of her foot. Help her recognize the difference in the feel of the
shape of the soles of her shoes so that she can tell which goes on which
foot. This is not easy for a child who sees well, so you will need to work
at this task for some time. Talk about which is right and which is left, and
help her learn her right foot and hand from her left ones. Show her how she
can place her hand on the bottom of her shoe when she is putting the shoe on
to help get it in place by pushing as she shoves her foot forward.

While she is mastering the art of dressing, you should fasten things for
her. Later, she can learn to tie, button, zip, and snap her clothes. Too
many procedures at one time can be confusing for a child. Also, at this
stage she is not ready for small muscle control required in fastening as
much as she will be a little later. Teach her each thing as she appears to
be ready for it if you want the learning to be as easy as possible.

When you note that some step in dressing seems particularly difficult for
her, calmly give her suggestions as to how to do it. Break the process down
into a step-by-step procedure so that she can learn the order in which she
needs to attack the job. She is going to need much repetition before she
gains the ability to dress and undress alone. Consistently see that she does
what she can independently, and lend her a hand with the other areas of
dressing. Tell and show her the way she can manage by herself next time.
Praise her when she succeeds and do not show impatience when she fails. She
is going to be frustrated by not getting into and out of things as quickly
and easily as she would like to. Both of you will grow weary of the
repetition essential to all of this learning. 

You, however, must remember, that to gain respect for herself and have a
feeling of worth, your child must become independent and able to rely upon
herself. It would be simpler and easier for you to dress her than to try to
show her how to do it herself. When time is at a premium, it is a temptation
to take over. Remind yourself that when you do this, you retard her
learning. Instead of saving time, you are wasting it. Later, you will be
rewarded for your patience when you see your child grow evermore eager and
able to manage for herself.

Carrie Gilmer, President
National Organization of Parents of Blind Children
A Division of the National Federation of the Blind
NFB National Center: 410-659-9314
Home Phone: 763-784-8590
carrie.gilmer at gmail.com
www.nfb.org/nopbc

-----Original Message-----
From: blindkid-bounces at nfbnet.org [mailto:blindkid-bounces at nfbnet.org] On
Behalf Of Jessica Stewart
Sent: Tuesday, November 11, 2008 9:25 PM
To: blindkid at nfbnet.org
Subject: [blindkid] New Member with lots of questions...

Hello All:

      My name is Jessica and I have a 4 year old whom is visually impaired.
She is my first child and the most important thing in the world to me. Aside
from the educational issues that I have been having, I am having so much
trouble trying to potty train her. So I was wondering if anyone had any tips
that would help me in helping her reach this goal? I would really appreciate
it. Thanks and I look forward to speaking with everyone and learning new
things. 

             Sincerely,
                 Jessica
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