[nfb-talk] New THOUGHT PROVOKER #152- The Cursed
cedarwoman1965 at neb.rr.com
Fri Dec 25 23:40:31 UTC 2009
My ex husband had this same type of experience with my parents.
They weren't keen on the idea of my marrying a blind man. In the Native
American culture, at least in mine, my family assumes the role of caring for
their family members with disabilities. Some families assume that that
particular family member cannot find or hold onto a job which is
We both had to work very hard to make my parents understand that we
could make it in the world and that we didn't need to be cared for. Until
they were able to reach the point of their understanding, it was very
difficult for both of us because they tended to hover more than necessary.
Lincoln NE US
From: nfb-talk-bounces at nfbnet.org [mailto:nfb-talk-bounces at nfbnet.org] On
Behalf Of Robert Leslie Newman
Sent: Sunday, December 20, 2009 9:40 AM
Subject: [nfb-talk] New THOUGHT PROVOKER #152- The Cursed
RE: The Cursed
Here is my #152nd THOUGHT PROVOKER. It is a study in how various religious
factions will view the blind; from near sainthood to being cursed. If you
have not read the PROVOKER, it follows. Recall that I collect responses and
post them upon my web site for all the WWW to read and learn from and that
URL is- Http://thoughtprovoker.info <http://thoughtprovoker.info/> If you
wish to receive THOUGHT PROVOKERS sent directly to you, just write me and
ask, at- newmanrl at cox.net
THOUGHT PROVOKER 152
"Hi, I'm Robert. Your accent, if I am reading it correctly, places you from
somewhere in the Middle East?"
The attractive dusky-skinned, dark-haired woman looked quizzically at the
guy approaching. He was about her age, nice looking, using a long white
cane. She had first noticed him upon her arrival in the hotel lobby, and
later in the registration line and reception area for those attending the
two-day conference. He had impressed her with his poise as he maneuvered
about independently, responding charmingly as he dealt with the awkward
reception his presence sometimes elicited. Without hesitation, she spoke up,
"Hello, and, yes. To put a finger or two on the map, Cairo originally, but
most recently, right here in Philly. My name is Dara --- I'm the only one
sitting in this row." A realization was blossoming within her; this guy's
disability didn't make her feel uncomfortable.
Anticipation fueling his every stride, Robert moved into the row. He hadn't
expected such a provocative seatmate at a conference where he knew there
wouldn't be anyone he'd know. Her voice is so beautiful, he thought.
Feeling at ease and maybe too much so, he couldn't believe his next words,
"Well, guess I'll sit by you and fill up the row so it's just ours."
They didn't have the entire row to themselves. Yet throughout the morning's
presentations, they indulged in periodic soft-spoken exchanges. Some
concerning the information being presented, some purely personal, and
sometimes, sharing some stifled laughter.
At the end of the morning session, they decided to have lunch together.
Later, they had dinner, then the next morning, breakfast, and then lunch
again. The conference was over at 4:00 PM.
"I've got to see you again. How about tomorrow lunch or dinner somewhere?"
"Yes, me too. Ah --- how about you come over to my apartment and I make
dinner --- you bring a refreshment."
The night of their date, dinner finished, with more wine, soft music, and a
deep lingering kiss, Dara said, "I once heard that it was very disconcerting
to look into a blind person's eyes. But ah --- being this close and looking
--- I'm not sure I know what they are referring to."
"Well I'm told --- good art work on non-scratch plastic like I have, can
"Ha! Oh Robert my dear man," Dara snuggled closer, "you are so full of
surprises and delights. I must tell you that I feel that I am falling in
love with you. "Fingertips caressing his cheek, "Before we get more
serious, we must go to my father. He must meet and pass his judgment on my
"Woo, You mean we have to get your father's permission to fall in love?"
"No, it's not that way. I have my own heart and feelings. I respect you for
who you are, my dear. Just that, my father is the --- head of the family. It
is the way within my culture. The man oversees the affairs of the family.
You will like him. He is a generous, loving, and God fearing man. And his
being judgmental; well --- it goes along with the position "
The day came for their trip to Dara's family home and her introduction of
Robert to her father came. Her mother served them tea and sweets. They
talked, drank tea, talked some more, and though her family were very polite,
they were nevertheless very curious about how this blind man lived.
After dinner, in her father's study, Dara and Robert spoke of their feelings
for one another. And her father answered. "My dear daughter, I do not give
my permission. Let me make this very clear, Robert, though you are a fine
fellow, I must oppose this marriage. I do not want my daughter to be fated
to the life she would have to live if she is betrothed to you. You are
blind, a condition which greatly, how should I say it --- blindness severely
impacts your life--you are stigmatized; you have reduced independence and,
therefore, your prospects to financially care for my daughter are
handicapped. No. I forbid this union. You are one of God's cursed."
Robert Leslie Newman
Email- newmanrl at cox.net
THOUGHT PROVOKER Website-
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