[blindkid] Identify yourself please

Sat Nov 22 01:17:33 UTC 2008

Not sure if you are directing that at me or not, but I absolutely don't scorn her for being inquisitive and wanting to know who she is talking to-- I feel the exact opposite and think it is great that she feels confident enough to ask for their name... I just feel it is rude of people to make her guess after she has specifically asked them who they are.

kala
> From: kah-az at cox.net> To: blindkid at nfbnet.org> Date: Fri, 21 Nov 2008 17:40:41 -0700> Subject: Re: [blindkid] Identify yourself please> > I'm going to add my 2-cents to all the other comments made. I've heard all > kinds of blind people, in ALL kinds of situations, at all kinds of > places....and they've all handled it about the same. It's either by asking > the person's name, or saying, "who's this?"...or "who's that?" It's pretty > simple, but it takes all kinds of personalities to pick what is right for > them. I know I wouldn't want to have someone say "Guess who?" at all, nor > would I like to try to figure out who was behind a door all the time. But > please don't scorn your child for being inquisitive enough to want to know > exactly who that person is....whether he's familiar with that person or not. > I've often said myself, "I'm sorry, but what is your name?" to people I > don't know, and I'm sighted.> > One issue that is totally different here is if someone is talking to your > child through you. At a restaurant, maybe a waiter asks you what your child > wants, instead of asking them. Or a teacher directly asks you about a way > that is best for him to get around, rather than asking HIM. That is > something you may have to get involved with until your child is old enough > to handle these situations best. I know it still happens that when I'm with > my daughter, someone will answer ME instead of answering HER. She'll often > respond as I've learned to just let THEM feel uncomfortable for a minute > rather than she or I feeling awkward. And....they eventually get it, and > direct their questions or comments then directly to her. And my daughter is > a grown up woman, not a child. So, it's never to early to start that lesson > in having your child definitely speak up...ask who they're talking to, and > if they're feeling ignored, make a 2nd. attempt at expressing their > issues.....it might not change the waiters of the world, but it'll give them > more self-esteem.> > Kathy> President> POBC - AZ> > > > > ----- Original Message ----- > From: "kala hjelle" <khjelle at hotmail.com>> To: "blindkid list" <blindkid at nfbnet.org>> Sent: Friday, November 21, 2008 8:13 AM> Subject: Re: [blindkid] Identify yourself please> > > >> > I only have a few seconds to write, but wanted to add a question quick > > that ties into this one...> >> > SO many people that Lily (8 years old) has met before (some only once or > > twice) come up to her and say hi. If she doesn't know who it is, she very > > politely says "hi! What's your name?" Sometimes they tell her right away, > > but sometimes they do something that irritates me to no end and I don't > > know how to ask them in a polite way to stop or explain to them why I > > don't like it.> >> > People who don't know her very well think she is amazing and they love > > that she can remember voices well. It makes them feel good if they say > > hi, and she knows who they are. So if she doesn't know right away and > > asks what their name is, they will say something like "You know me, Lily, > > listen to my voice and try to guess..."> >> > I HATE THIS! What if every time you started talking to someone you had to > > guess who they were?!?> > How have other people handled this one?? I need some suggestions. I have > > said things in the past to people about it, and about not treating her > > like she is a baby, or like she is AMAZING just because she can do the > > simplest little things, (which feels so insulting to me becasue she can do > > so much more that they have no idea about) etc. and about countless other > > things, but I always get a look back like I am such a mean mom or just a > > rude person in general. Does this just come with the territory of being a > > parent of a blind child? Help please :)> >> > Sorry for the spelling and grammar errors...I have to go, but wanted to > > quick get this in.> > kala> >> >> >> From: carrie.gilmer at gmail.com> To: blindkid at nfbnet.org> Date: Fri, 21 Nov > >> 2008 08:45:28 -0600> Subject: [blindkid] Identify yourself please> > Hi > >> All, Especially to our blind colleagues and friends.> > > > I have one > >> thing with Jordan that has improved but still is an "issue". I> think it > >> bugs me way more than him, and likely that is why it is still an> > >> "issue".> > > > Jordan often does not ask people to identify themselves. > >> It is one thing,> and understandable to me, when he is in the very > >> crowded school hallways and> some voice calls out, "hey Jordan!" in a > >> passing greeting and he simply> calls back hey-but has no idea who that > >> hey came from and to not yell out in> a crowd "hey who are you?",> > > > > >> But there are many times.> > At the state fair, in a store, even at a > >> lunch room table!, where he THINKS> he is talking to one person and > >> discovers mid-conversation that is not who> he is talking with (and never > >> says anything or finds in the end who it was),> or we walk away from the > >> teen working the register or who has come up in> Best Buy and said > >> "hello" and I ask "Who was that?" and he says I have no> idea. I know > >> that sometimes because he is one of 3,000 at school-and> because he has > >> the one and only thing, a lot more people know who he is than> vice versa > >> and sometimes he really doesn't know who they are, but not> uncommonly it > >> is evident the kid who is greeting him, he should know, but he> doesn't > >> ask. I know that sometimes he thinks it is rude, if the other kid> thinks > >> Jordan should know who they are.the same way if I forget someone's> name > >> and I should definitely know it, and I am thinking how can I ask> without > >> offending?...But many times he is just too "shy" about it. I have> seen > >> on the student list before threads where lots of kids are somewhat> > >> uncomfortable with this one. Any strategies that you blind folks have > >> come> up with to gain the confidence or decide when to do it? Is it just > >> a> personality thing, because I know many blind folks who are not shy > >> about it> and simply say, "Who are you?"> > > > Should I just let this > >> one go now as a mom-especially since he is now a> senior in high school? > >> > > > > Carrie Gilmer, President> > National Organization of Parents of > >> Blind Children> > A Division of the National Federation of the Blind> > > >> NFB National Center: 410-659-9314> > Home Phone: 763-784-8590> > > >> carrie.gilmer at gmail.com> > www.nfb.org/nopbc> > > > > >> _______________________________________________> blindkid mailing list> > >> blindkid at nfbnet.org> > >> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blindkid_nfbnet.org> To > >> unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for > >> blindkid:> > >> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blindkid_nfbnet.org/khjelle%40hotmail.com> > _________________________________________________________________> > Access your email online and on the go with Windows Live Hotmail.> > http://windowslive.com/Explore/Hotmail?ocid=TXT_TAGLM_WL_hotmail_acq_access_112008> > _______________________________________________> > blindkid mailing list> > blindkid at nfbnet.org> > http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blindkid_nfbnet.org> > To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for > > blindkid:> > http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blindkid_nfbnet.org/kah-az%40cox.net> > > --------------------------------------------------------------------------------> > > > No virus found in this incoming message.> Checked by AVG - http://www.avg.com> Version: 8.0.175 / Virus Database: 270.9.9/1803 - Release Date: 11/21/2008 > 9:37 AM> > > _______________________________________________> blindkid mailing list> blindkid at nfbnet.org> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blindkid_nfbnet.org> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for blindkid:> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blindkid_nfbnet.org/khjelle%40hotmail.com
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