[blindkid] Identify yourself please

Sat Nov 22 14:09:19 UTC 2008

that's cool! I think I'll try that one next time.
Bonnie
----- Original Message ----- 
From: "Mike Freeman" <k7uij at panix.com>
To: "NFBnet Blind Kid Mailing List,(for parents of blind children)" 
<blindkid at nfbnet.org>
Sent: Saturday, November 22, 2008 12:24 AM
Subject: Re: [blindkid] Identify yourself please

I agree that the guessing game is rude. However, I contend that people
play this game because they are uncomfortable around a blind person and
can't think what else to say or do. Whatever the outcome, it doesn't
threaten his/her (the person who wants the blind person to guess who
s/he is) paradigm of blindness and the person is vindicated and doesnt'
have to confront his/her prejudices regarding the blind: if the blind
person doesn't guess correctly, he/she is deemed at the least awkward
and at most stupid. If the blind person guesses correctly, he/she is
deemed miraculous for having rememberd.

It strikes me that the simple answer to the "guess who I am!" gambit
would be to ask: "Why? Haven't you figured out who you are yet?" That
oughtta stop 'em dead in their tracks! (grin)

Mike

----- Original Message ----- 
From: "kala hjelle" <khjelle at hotmail.com>
To: "blindkid list" <blindkid at nfbnet.org>
Sent: Friday, November 21, 2008 5:17 PM
Subject: Re: [blindkid] Identify yourself please

Not sure if you are directing that at me or not, but I absolutely don't
scorn her for being inquisitive and wanting to know who she is talking
to-- I feel the exact opposite and think it is great that she feels
confident enough to ask for their name... I just feel it is rude of
people to make her guess after she has specifically asked them who they
are.

kala
> From: kah-az at cox.net> To: blindkid at nfbnet.org> Date: Fri, 21 Nov 2008
> 17:40:41 -0700> Subject: Re: [blindkid] Identify yourself please> >
> I'm going to add my 2-cents to all the other comments made. I've heard
> all > kinds of blind people, in ALL kinds of situations, at all kinds
> of > places....and they've all handled it about the same. It's either
> by asking > the person's name, or saying, "who's this?"...or "who's
> that?" It's pretty > simple, but it takes all kinds of personalities
> to pick what is right for > them. I know I wouldn't want to have
> someone say "Guess who?" at all, nor > would I like to try to figure
> out who was behind a door all the time. But > please don't scorn your
> child for being inquisitive enough to want to know > exactly who that
> person is....whether he's familiar with that person or not. > I've
> often said myself, "I'm sorry, but what is your name?" to people I >
> don't know, and I'm sighted.> > One issue that is totally different
> here is if someone is talking to your > child through you. At a
> restaurant, maybe a waiter asks you what your child > wants, instead
> of asking them. Or a teacher directly asks you about a way > that is
> best for him to get around, rather than asking HIM. That is >
> something you may have to get involved with until your child is old
> enough > to handle these situations best. I know it still happens that
> when I'm with > my daughter, someone will answer ME instead of
> answering HER. She'll often > respond as I've learned to just let THEM
> feel uncomfortable for a minute > rather than she or I feeling
> awkward. And....they eventually get it, and > direct their questions
> or comments then directly to her. And my daughter is > a grown up
> woman, not a child. So, it's never to early to start that lesson > in
> having your child definitely speak up...ask who they're talking to,
> and > if they're feeling ignored, make a 2nd. attempt at expressing
> their > issues.....it might not change the waiters of the world, but
> it'll give them > more self-esteem.> > Kathy> President> POBC - AZ> >
>  > > > ----- Original Message ----- > From: "kala hjelle"
> <khjelle at hotmail.com>> To: "blindkid list" <blindkid at nfbnet.org>>
> Sent: Friday, November 21, 2008 8:13 AM> Subject: Re: [blindkid]
> Identify yourself please> > > >> > I only have a few seconds to write,
> but wanted to add a question quick > > that ties into this one...> >>
>  > SO many people that Lily (8 years old) has met before (some only
> once or > > twice) come up to her and say hi. If she doesn't know who
> it is, she very > > politely says "hi! What's your name?" Sometimes
> they tell her right away, > > but sometimes they do something that
> irritates me to no end and I don't > > know how to ask them in a
> polite way to stop or explain to them why I > > don't like it.> >> >
> People who don't know her very well think she is amazing and they love
>  > > that she can remember voices well. It makes them feel good if they
> say > > hi, and she knows who they are. So if she doesn't know right
> away and > > asks what their name is, they will say something like
> "You know me, Lily, > > listen to my voice and try to guess..."> >> >
> I HATE THIS! What if every time you started talking to someone you had
> to > > guess who they were?!?> > How have other people handled this
> one?? I need some suggestions. I have > > said things in the past to
> people about it, and about not treating her > > like she is a baby, or
> like she is AMAZING just because she can do the > > simplest little
> things, (which feels so insulting to me becasue she can do > > so much
> more that they have no idea about) etc. and about countless other > >
> things, but I always get a look back like I am such a mean mom or just
> a > > rude person in general. Does this just come with the territory
> of being a > > parent of a blind child? Help please :)> >> > Sorry for
> the spelling and grammar errors...I have to go, but wanted to > >
> quick get this in.> > kala> >> >> >> From: carrie.gilmer at gmail.com>
> To: blindkid at nfbnet.org> Date: Fri, 21 Nov > >> 2008 08:45:28 -0600>
> Subject: [blindkid] Identify yourself please> > Hi > >> All,
> Especially to our blind colleagues and friends.> > > > I have one > >>
> thing with Jordan that has improved but still is an "issue". I> think
> it > >> bugs me way more than him, and likely that is why it is still
> an> > >> "issue".> > > > Jordan often does not ask people to identify
> themselves. > >> It is one thing,> and understandable to me, when he
> is in the very > >> crowded school hallways and> some voice calls out,
> "hey Jordan!" in a > >> passing greeting and he simply> calls back
> hey-but has no idea who that > >> hey came from and to not yell out
> in> a crowd "hey who are you?",> > > > > >> But there are many times.>
>  > At the state fair, in a store, even at a > >> lunch room table!,
> where he THINKS> he is talking to one person and > >> discovers
> mid-conversation that is not who> he is talking with (and never > >>
> says anything or finds in the end who it was),> or we walk away from
> the > >> teen working the register or who has come up in> Best Buy and
> said > >> "hello" and I ask "Who was that?" and he says I have no>
> idea. I know > >> that sometimes because he is one of 3,000 at
> school-and> because he has > >> the one and only thing, a lot more
> people know who he is than> vice versa > >> and sometimes he really
> doesn't know who they are, but not> uncommonly it > >> is evident the
> kid who is greeting him, he should know, but he> doesn't > >> ask. I
> know that sometimes he thinks it is rude, if the other kid> thinks >
>  >> Jordan should know who they are.the same way if I forget someone's>
> name > >> and I should definitely know it, and I am thinking how can I
> ask> without > >> offending?...But many times he is just too "shy"
> about it. I have> seen > >> on the student list before threads where
> lots of kids are somewhat> > >> uncomfortable with this one. Any
> strategies that you blind folks have > >> come> up with to gain the
> confidence or decide when to do it? Is it just > >> a> personality
> thing, because I know many blind folks who are not shy > >> about it>
> and simply say, "Who are you?"> > > > Should I just let this > >> one
> go now as a mom-especially since he is now a> senior in high school? >
>  >> > > > > Carrie Gilmer, President> > National Organization of
> Parents of > >> Blind Children> > A Division of the National
> Federation of the Blind> > > >> NFB National Center: 410-659-9314> >
> Home Phone: 763-784-8590> > > >> carrie.gilmer at gmail.com> >
> www.nfb.org/nopbc> > > > > >>
> _______________________________________________> blindkid mailing
> list> > >> blindkid at nfbnet.org> > >>
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blindkid_nfbnet.org> To > >>
> unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for >
>  >> blindkid:> > >>
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blindkid_nfbnet.org/khjelle%40hotmail.com> >
> _________________________________________________________________> >
> Access your email online and on the go with Windows Live Hotmail.> >
> http://windowslive.com/Explore/Hotmail?ocid=TXT_TAGLM_WL_hotmail_acq_access_112008> >
> _______________________________________________> > blindkid mailing
> list> > blindkid at nfbnet.org> >
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blindkid_nfbnet.org> > To
> unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for > >
> blindkid:> >
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blindkid_nfbnet.org/kah-az%40cox.net> >
>  > -------------------------------------------------------------------------------->
>  > > > No virus found in this incoming message.> Checked by AVG -
> http://www.avg.com> Version: 8.0.175 / Virus Database: 270.9.9/1803 -
> Release Date: 11/21/2008 > 9:37 AM> > >
> _______________________________________________> blindkid mailing
> list> blindkid at nfbnet.org>
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blindkid_nfbnet.org> To
> unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
> blindkid:>
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blindkid_nfbnet.org/khjelle%40hotmail.com
_________________________________________________________________
Get more done, have more fun, and stay more connected with Windows
Mobile®.
http://clk.atdmt.com/MRT/go/119642556/direct/01/
_______________________________________________
blindkid mailing list
blindkid at nfbnet.org
http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blindkid_nfbnet.org
To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
blindkid:
http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blindkid_nfbnet.org/k7uij%40panix.com

_______________________________________________
blindkid mailing list
blindkid at nfbnet.org
http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blindkid_nfbnet.org
To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for 
blindkid:
http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blindkid_nfbnet.org/lucas.bonnie%40gmail.com 