[Blindtlk] the meaning of confidence

[Gary Wunder]

Hi Julie. I like your post--the humor and the serious parts.

For me confidence is composed of two parts--having the belief in myself to
try, and practicing what I find difficult enough that it becomes less
difficult and hence more doable. An earthy example if you will permit it: I
hate trying to find bathrooms in a public place and used to take foolish
pride in my bladder--how long I could go without going. Well, it's wonderful
that God blessed me with a good bladder, but it is more productive to
address my tension at having to practice structured discovery and just go
find a bathroom. Age has helped me along with this issue, not only because I
believe more in myself, but my bladder doesn't let me ignore it for eight or
ten hours at a time. I've also found that I'm more uncomfortable being
physically uncomfortable than I was being mentally uncomfortable. 

Confidence may be an overused word on this list, but for me it really
represents two very important areas of growth: knowing I can safely venture
forth, and making that trip a minor event rather than something I would
ponder exhaustively before taking it.






-----Original Message-----
From: blindtlk-bounces at nfbnet.org [mailto:blindtlk-bounces at nfbnet.org] On
Behalf Of Julie J
Sent: Tuesday, March 01, 2011 8:03 AM
To: Blind Talk Mailing List
Subject: [Blindtlk] the meaning of confidence

I've noticed that often we toss out the word "confidence" in our
discussions, but I often wonder what exactly is "confidence"?

I've read promotional material for guide dog schools that tell you if you
get a guide dog you'll increase your confidence and independence.  I've seen
claims that if you have good blindness skills, you'll be confident.  Jeeze,
I've even seen deodorant commercials claiming increased confidence if you
use their product. *smile*

But if it was that easy wouldn't we all be confident people?  We aren't and
even those who claim a strong level of confidence still have moments of
insecurity.  What then is confidence and where does it come from?

I would assert that confidence comes from within.  It isn't based on a cane
or a dog or a certain number of skills attained.  I believe it is an
attitude, an inner knowing.  It is being comfortable in your own skin.   I
don't think there is anything or anyone that can give us confidence.  I
believe that it is something we must claim for ourselves.  

Certainly there are extrinsic circumstances that assist us on the road to
claiming confidence for ourselves, like good cane skills or a guide dog, but
I do not believe that those things *give* us anything, except for perhaps
the opportunity for self discovery.

Thoughts?
Julie
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